🧢 Captain's Log

Sun 25 Sep 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Crusaders CC · HomeformLWWWW

Sunday 25 September saw Crusaders CC roll into Linton Park on a pleasant, grey afternoon, and I duly lost the toss — leaving us to field first and, we hoped, keep things respectable. That hope survived about as long as Sanam Pannu's innings, which is to say not very long at all. His unbeaten 78 anchored a Crusaders total of 269/4 from their 40 overs, with Jin Singh (53) and Chand Channa (42) piling on further misery. To our credit, the bowling wasn't without its bright spots — Junaid Mufti was the pick of the attack with 1-19, and Nolan Wilde (1-30) and Sam Boyns (1-39) chipped in gamely, though against that kind of scoring rate it rather felt like bringing a teaspoon to bail out a rowing boat. Poor Aaron Hughes, meanwhile, had a torrid time behind the stumps, shipping 13 byes for his troubles.

Chasing 270 was always going to want something special from the bat, and instead we mustered 120 all out in 32.5 overs, with Theo Clements and John Karassellos both departing for golden ducks to set the tone. It was, in short, not our day — beaten by 149 runs, comprehensively and without much argument.

Still, the season ticks on: Jordan Austin continues to lead our run charts with 421 for the year, and Sam Boyns sits fourth in the wickets list with 11. As for last Sunday — heads up, lessons noted, and back to the nets we go.

Sat 24 Sep 2022 🧢 1st XIv The Mote CC · HomeformWLLLL

Saturday the 24th of September, and The Mote rolled up under a damp, mild sky that promised more than it delivered. I lost the toss — no change there — and they had no hesitation in sticking us in.

It was a funny sort of knock. I found some rhythm early and made 47, the innings that held the thing together, with Alex Wade chipping in a tidy 20 alongside me. But cricket has a habit of humbling you just when you're feeling pleased with yourself, and from a respectable 56 for 3 we contrived to stumble to 62 for 6 in the time it takes to put the kettle on. The Duck Club secretary was rubbing his hands: Nolan Wilde, Theo Clements and Sam King all took that long, lonely walk back for nought apiece. Only the extras column kept its nerve, quietly amassing 25 while the rest of us panicked, and we were all out for 132 in 39.3 overs.

Out we went to defend it, chests puffed, plans laid — and got precisely 0.4 of an over in before the heavens, or the umpires, or simply the afternoon itself decided enough was enough, with The Mote on 4 for none. Not nearly time to find out who'd have won.

So honours shared, a draw manufactured more by the clock than by either side's cricket. Frustrating, but there are worse ways to spend a Saturday than watching your own 47 go begging for a result.

Sun 18 Sep 2022 🧢 Twenty20v Bexleyheath CC · HomeformWWLWW

Sunday 18 September, and the coin let us down before a ball was bowled — Bexleyheath won the toss and, with the sort of confidence that comes from not having to bat first, sent us in.

We made rather a decent fist of it. Toby Hughes played the innings of the day, a crisp 62 that dragged us to a total worth defending, with William Roxburgh (23) and Tobey Castle (21) chipping in to make sure the middle overs didn't go begging. 155/7 from our 20 felt like a total we could bowl at.

And bowl at it we did, for a good while. George Taylor was superb, ripping through with 3-25, and Toby Hughes — evidently not content with a half-century — came back for 2-22, with Anthony Karassellos chipping in a wicket of his own. But Billy Hally (30 not out) and Salman Khan (29) had other ideas, and Bexleyheath crept over the line with 156/7 in 19.5 overs, three wickets and precisely half a ball to spare. Cruel margins, cricket.

Small consolation in the season's bigger picture — Toby Hughes now sits proudly atop the 2022 Twenty20 run charts with 154, and Fred Taylor lurks second in the wicket charts on 6. The engine room is clearly in order; it's just the finishing that let us down.

A defeat, then, but not a disgrace — beaten by three wickets by a side that had to work hard for every one of them. We'll be better for it next week.

Sun 18 Sep 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv TC Tenterden CC · AwayformLLWWW

I'll deliver at 190 all out — no, sorry, force of habit. Here's the report.

Sunday 18 September took us out to Tenterden, under skies the colour of an old flannel and a toss that, predictably, went against us. Put into bat, we ground out 181 all out in 53.1 overs — a total that owed almost everything to Aaron Hughes, whose unbeaten 64 was the innings' one shaft of real sunlight. Sam King chipped in a handy 24, and I managed the same, though anyone tuning in for the middle order after that would have found precious little to admire: Toby Joseph, Theo Clements and Thomas Beeney all made ducks, a trio of golden nothings that rather summed up our afternoon with the bat. We were grateful, not for the first time this season, for 32 extras doing the sort of quiet, uncomplimented work that never makes the scorebook glow.

Defending 181 looked a tall order when Tenterden lost an early wicket at 2, but Nick Waterhouse's fine 55 and Angus Hay's 38 built a 75-run stand that threatened to bury us. Then, mercifully, the innings imploded — 133-4 becoming 139-7 in a hurry, with Joe Sargent, Gordon Potter and Thomas Lloyd all falling for ducks of their own. Sam Boyns was the chief architect, superb figures of 3-7 with four maidens, well supported by Thomas Beeney's 3-26 (a effort that nudged him past Allan Cooper into 17th on the club's all-time wicket list) and Ian Hollingworth's 2-35. Aaron Hughes had a torrid time behind the stumps, 19 byes testament to a pitch with ideas of its own.

We got over the line by 29 runs — scrappy, occasionally comic, but a very good day for the club.

Sat 17 Sep 2022 🧢 1st XIv Linden Park CC · HomeformLWLLL

Saturday 17 September dawned pleasant and cloudy — ideal, I told myself as I called correctly and stuck Linden Park in, for a bit of swing and a tidy afternoon in the field. As so often in this game, the pitch had rather different ideas. Their openers set about us with alarming confidence, putting on 101 before we prised out the first wicket, and though I did manage to have Anand Veerapandian back in the pavilion for a golden duck, the middle order simply carried on regardless — a monstrous 123-run stand for the fourth wicket doing most of the damage. Paul Seldon made merry with 85, Tom Corner chipped in a classy fifty, and Jayaprakash Seluthiyan's 48 rounded out a chastening 246 for 5. I finished with 2-45, ably backed by Sam King's 2-52 and Alex Keeler's 1-31, but 246 was always going to take some chasing.

Chase it we did not. Anthony Karassellos's battling 22 was as good as it got, John Karassellos fell for a duck of his own, and we subsided to 117 all out in 31.2 overs — extras, with 33, our second-highest scorer, which rather tells its own story. Poor Theo Clements had a torrid time behind the stumps too, nine byes going begging as if to underline the theme of the day.

There were small mercies: Alex Keeler sits second in the season's run charts with 410, and my 17 wickets have me third among the bowlers. Cold comfort, though — beaten by 129 runs, we trudge back to the nets, heads bowed but spirits, as ever, unbroken.

Sun 11 Sep 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Teston CC · HomeformLLLWW

Sunday the 11th of September saw us play host to Teston CC beneath a warm if determinedly grey sky, and when the coin fell against us and they invited us to bat, none of us imagined quite how thoroughly we'd make them regret it. Jordan Austin and Thomas Roxburgh set about proceedings with the calm menace of men who had somewhere better to be, putting on 175 for the first wicket before either was parted from the crease. Jordan carried on to a chanceless hundred, unbeaten at the close, while Thomas fell just shy of what would have been a fine century himself for 90. Anthony Karassellos chipped in a brisk 25, and we closed on a formidable 296 for 9 from our 40 — poor Alex Wade the lone sacrifice to the Duck Club, back in the hutch without troubling the scorers.

Defending a total of that size ought to be the easy part, and so it proved. Nolan Wilde was magnificent with the ball, 3 for 15, while Tim Thirkell bowled with the miserly discipline of a man counting every last penny — three maidens and figures of 1 for 4 — and Thomas Beeney chipped in with 1 for 14. Teston mustered a respectable 126 for 7, Graham Smart top-scoring with 40, but it was never enough. Phil Edmonds joined Alex in Duck Club infamy.

Milestones abounded too — Jordan reaching 6,000 career runs and Thomas 1,000 — capping a thoroughly memorable afternoon. A 170-run victory and a red-letter day for the club.

Sat 10 Sep 2022 🧢 1st XIv West Farleigh CC · HomeformLLWLL

Well, the coin gods were against us again — West Farleigh called correctly and stuck us in under a warm, drizzly Kent sky, the sort of afternoon that makes you wonder whether you've brought the right jumper. We knuckled down regardless and posted a very respectable 209 for 8 from our 40, built around Toby Hughes, who tortured himself and the opposition in equal measure with a magnificent 99 — agonisingly, achingly close to three figures, and I suspect he'll be seeing that scoreboard in his sleep. Nolan Wilde chipped in an unbeaten 39 and Richard Piper 27, the pair anchoring a handy 64-run stand for the fourth wicket. Spare a thought, though, for poor Toby Joseph, whose walk back for nought duly earned him a place in the Duck Club ledger.

Defending it, we gave everything. Hughes, not content with his heroics at the crease, ran in and took 3 for 24, backed up nicely by Luke Welsman's miserly 2 for 6 and Tim Thirkell's 2 for 43; I did my bit too, holding down an end for a couple of maidens. Theo Clements had a torrid time behind the stumps, leaking 9 byes, while Kevin Baker and Pat Davis both departed without scoring. But Matthew Davis's 60, with support from Alex Beechey and Marius Van Der Schyff, dragged West Farleigh over the line by the barest of margins — one wicket, in 39.5 overs of pure agony.

There was a silver lining: Richard Piper's 27 lifted him past Daniel Thirkell into 4th on the club's all-time run-scoring list, a fine personal landmark on a losing afternoon. Toby Hughes, meanwhile, continues to lead our 2022 run charts with 437 and sits second among the wicket-takers on 29 — the form of his life, even if the ton keeps eluding him. Not our day, gentlemen — heads up, and back to the nets.

Sun 04 Sep 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Bredgar CC · AwayformWLLLL

We travelled down to Bredgar in good spirits, though the spirits took something of a battering when the coin came down against us and we were sent out to field. Forty overs of leather-chasing later, and I can report Bredgar had rather enjoyed themselves: 268 for 5, built on a second-wicket stand of 123 that Lewis White (73) and Edward Louden (72) constructed with the sort of unhurried menace that has club bowlers reaching for the sunscreen and questioning their run-ups. Jonathan Knight's unbeaten 41 rubbed salt in. Sam King did what he could with 2 for 52, Tim Thirkell chipped away for 1 for 37, and I managed to prise out one for 45 myself — more through persistence than guile. Poor Theo Clements, meanwhile, had one of those afternoons behind the stumps where the ball seemed magnetically drawn past him, 18 byes testament to a wicket with ideas of its own.

Chasing 269 was always going to want something special, and for a while we threatened it. Neill Pennefather (36) and Sam King (35) both got in and got out just when they threatened to cut loose, but I dug in for an unbeaten 48 to at least give the tail something to build the scorebook around. We closed on 210 for 7 — battling, but a good 58 runs shy of the target.

Not our day, then, and a reminder that Bredgar's top order can bat rather better than our attack would like. Richard Piper and Tim Thirkell continue to lead the season's charts with bat and ball respectively, which is some consolation. For the rest of us: heads up, and back to the nets.

Sun 04 Sep 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Stowting CC · HomeformWLLLW

Here's the report:

I'll admit it – when I called correctly at the toss and elected to bat, I did allow myself a small, private smile. Warm, overcast skies, a good surface underfoot, and Stowting CC standing between us and three points: the scene was set nicely. Aaron Hughes then went and set about proving me right, and then some, cracking a superb 147 that also brought up 4,000 career runs for the club – one for the mantelpiece indeed, and thoroughly deserved. He and his opening partner put on 127 for the first wicket before anyone so much as troubled the scorers with a dismissal, and William Roxburgh's classy 56 kept the scoreboard humming along nicely. Thomas Roxburgh's unbeaten 32 rounded things off in style as we posted a formidable 277 for 3 from our forty overs.

Defending that lot should have been the easy part, but Stowting had other ideas, with Bobby Rumley playing a proper captain's-nightmare of an innings – 131 not out, thank you very much – ably supported through a stand of 62 with Kane Wheeler and Steve Jackson, both good for 30 apiece. I did my bit with the ball, picking up 2 for 67, while Anthony Karassellos and Tobey Castle chipped in with a wicket each to keep the required rate honest.

In the end we held our nerve, and them, to win by 14 runs. A proper old-fashioned scrap of a run chase, but the total we set proved just enough. Onwards indeed.

Sat 03 Sep 2022 🧢 2nd XIv LC Locksbottom CC · HomeformWWWWW

From the captain's chair, Saturday 3rd September, and a warm, drizzly afternoon at home to Locksbottom CC. I lost the toss again — my coin-flipping form remains as reliable as an English summer — and they had no hesitation in batting first, leaving us to trudge into the field with sandwiches barely digested.

Locksbottom compiled 155 all out in 39.3 overs, built around a well-made fifty from Minesh Patel (55) and useful support from Jack Thompson (23). Joe Seymour and Joshua Lott both departed for ducks at our hands, which was some consolation. The real story with the ball was Luke Welsman, who simply ran riot, tearing through them with 5-6 — bowling of that quality doesn't come along often on a soggy Saturday. Anthony Karassellos chipped in nicely too, 3-27 with three tidy maidens, and Nick Tromp took 2-33.

With the bat, we never quite got going, bowled out for 102 in 29.3 overs. Laurie Probert stood firm and unbeaten on 39, a genuinely lone hand, while Matthew Carter and Tim Thirkell both fell without scoring. Fourteen byes crept through as well — a testing afternoon behind the stumps for Anthony Karassellos, bless him.

Elsewhere, Richard Piper continues to lead the 2nd XI run charts with 351 for the season, and Anthony Karassellos sits third in the wicket-takers on 14 — small crumbs of comfort on a day we finished 53 runs short. Not our day, lads. Heads up, and back to the nets.

Sat 27 Aug 2022 🧢 2nd XIv SC Sennocke CC · AwayformLWWWW

Skipper's Log — Sennocke CC, away, Saturday 27 August 2022. Warm with the odd shower blowing through, the sort of afternoon that makes you check the sky more than the scorebook.

Batting first, we put together a tidy 196/8 from our 40 overs. Junaid Mufti led the way with a fine 55, and I was pleased to chip in with 38 myself, with Laurie Probert adding a handy 31 alongside. Ian Hollingworth's contribution, sadly, was a golden duck — the sort of dismissal that gets a sympathetic pat on the back in the pavilion and nothing more.

Two hundred looked a fair total to defend, and so it proved, though not without Sennocke making us work for it. Robert Ede played a lovely knock of 67 not out to keep them in the hunt, but the rest of their order simply couldn't build around him — William Sackville West and Alex Bromley both departed without troubling the scorers. Junaid Mufti, having top-scored earlier, then turned his hand with the ball for a superb 3-16, while Anthony Karassellos bowled tightly for 2-43 with two maidens, and Tim Thirkell picked up 1-21. Sennocke fell short on 150/9.

A thoroughly satisfying afternoon all round — runs from the top order, discipline with the ball, and a result to make the drive home feel considerably shorter. A win to savour indeed.

Sat 27 Aug 2022 🧢 1st XIv BC Bidborough CC · HomeformWLLWL

Not our day — down by 16 runs at Bidborough, though I'll always defend the toss decision.

Warm and showery it was at Bidborough on the 27th, the sort of afternoon that makes you wonder whether to bowl in a jumper. I won the toss and stuck us in the field, a call I still stand by, and for long stretches it looked shrewd enough. Bidborough crawled to 139-4 before suddenly finding fifth gear, and the innings closed on 166/7 from their forty overs — Daniel Page top-scoring with 47, well supported by Archie Wells's 37, the pair putting on 53 for the fourth wicket before the middle order wobbled from 147-7 in a hurry. Richard Knowler was superb with the ball, 4-38, backed up nicely by Martin Harris (2-41) and Toby Hughes (1-34), and there was even a duck at our hands for Howard Nankivell — small mercies.

Chasing 167, we never quite found our rhythm. William Roxburgh played a lovely hand for 53, ushered along by Aaron Hughes's 35, and their 77-run stand for the fifth wicket was the innings in miniature — solid, promising, and ultimately not enough. Wickets clattered from 149-7 to all out for 150 in the space of a few deliveries, with Alex Keeler, Toby Hughes and Thomas Beeney all walking the plank for nought, and a generous 26 extras doing more for us than most of the top order. I contributed a workmanlike 17 myself, which felt about right for the conditions.

Sixteen runs the wrong side of it in the end — a match that slipped through our fingers rather than one we were outclassed in. Heads up, chins high, and back to the nets.

Sun 21 Aug 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Borstal CC · HomeformLWLLL

I once had 128 to Will Thew, so I don't want to hear another word about it — Sunday's home fixture against Borstal CC will have to serve as the story of the day I nearly stole the show and still finished second.

Winning the toss on a warm, cloudy afternoon, I had no hesitation in taking first strike, and the lads repaid the faith handsomely. Will Thew played an innings of real substance, a superb 128 that anchored the whole effort, and I was fortunate enough to find some form myself alongside him, chipping in with 88. Between us we helped push the total to a very healthy 253 for 4 from our 40 overs — the sort of score that has you allowing yourself a quiet pint before the tea interval.

Alas, Borstal had other ideas. Sanath Dandeniya set about our bowling with a chanceless-looking century, 142 no less, and found a willing ally in Dylan Solano Nathan, who cruised past his own fifty to 66. A second-wicket stand of 194 did the real damage, and no amount of early promise — they were 4 down for not very many, and poor Saqib Saeed departed without opening his account — could stop the visitors reeling us in. Tim Thirkell toiled manfully for 2 for 57, ably backed up by both Harvey and Ian Lowe, but 256 for 5 in 37.2 overs got them home by five wickets.

There was a silver lining: Tim's brace nudged him past Mark Christmas to 11th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list, a fine achievement on an otherwise chastening day. Not our day, all told — heads up, and back to the nets.

Sun 21 Aug 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Mersham Le Hatch CC · AwayformLWLLL

Here's the match report:

I'll admit the coin toss set the tone for the day — no luck there, and Mersham Le Hatch elected to field, leaving us to make first use of a warm, overcast Sunday afternoon at their ground. Jordan Austin played the innings of the day, a fine 64 that anchored everything, with Luke Welsman's 33 and Benjamin Austin's 32 filling in nicely around him as we posted 236 all out from 37.5 overs — a total that gave us something to bowl at. My own contribution, in the interests of full disclosure, was a golden duck. The walk back to the pavilion felt considerably longer than the walk out.

With the ball, we set about defending it, and Sam Boyns led from the front with a superb 3-41, two of those overs maidens, choking the runs when it mattered most. Anthony Karassellos chipped in admirably with 2-43, and we even had the satisfaction of seeing David Hatton depart for a duck of his own at our hands — misery loves company. Taha Tippu, though, was in no mood to cooperate, compiling an unbeaten 129 that very nearly took the game away from us, well supported by Jeremy Godden's 42. Their innings closed on 218/5 from 40 overs.

In the end, though, 18 runs was enough. A proper away win, built on runs when we needed them and discipline with the ball when it counted — my own duck notwithstanding. Onwards to the next one.

Sat 20 Aug 2022 🧢 2nd XIv GC Groombridge CC · HomeformWLWWW

Skipper's Log — Saturday 20 August 2022. A warm, cloudy afternoon at Linton Park, and Groombridge CC in town. I lost the toss again — my coin-calling form remains as reliable as an English summer — and we were put into the field.

They made a solid fist of it, posting 165/6 from their 40 overs. An early wicket for just 7 had us daring to dream, but Harry Balcombe (53) and Andy Walker (52) steadied the ship and then some, adding a crucial 93 for the fourth wicket while we toiled in the deep field, wondering where that early promise had gone. Gokul Nair chipped in with 24. Credit where due: Junaid Mufti was superb, 2-10 off his three maidens, tight as a drum, with Nick Tromp (2-27) and Richard Knowler (2-51) mopping up either end.

Chasing 166, we had our own wobble — Rajeev Raju departed without troubling the scorers, a proper king pair of a duck to open proceedings. Laurie Probert then played the innings of the day, 44 well-made runs, backed up by Srikrishna Challa (30) and Martin Rivers (24), with a sturdy 60-run third-wicket stand doing the heavy lifting. I added 23 myself, happy to play a supporting hand. Then, as is our club's proud tradition, the wheels came clean off — 139-4 became 144-7 before we'd caught our breath. Somehow, with hearts in mouths and eyes half-shut, we scrambled home by 2 wickets with 168/8 from 38.5 overs.

A proper nerve-shredder, but a win's a win — and on a day like this, we'll take it gladly.

Sat 20 Aug 2022 🧢 1st XIv Bearsted CC · AwayformWWLLW

Saturday 20 August found us on the road at Bearsted, and when I called correctly at the toss I fancied my judgement no end — bowl first, I said, and for a good while it looked the shrewdest decision I'd made all season. Bearsted ground out 196 all out in 39.3 overs, built chiefly on Lewis Bedwell's fifty-plus 53 and useful contributions from Mark Hodges (43) and James West (39). Credit where it's due: Joshua Knowler was magnificent, prising out five for 45, with Toby Hughes chipping in three for 56 and Alex Keeler holding one end in a vice with four maidens on the way to 1-14. We even had Alex Lush and Steven Benjamin back in the hutch without troubling the scorers — small mercies, gratefully received.

So 196 wasn't a disaster, and for an hour or two I still believed. Then we batted. Thomas Roxburgh fought the good fight for 42, but around him the innings folded like a deckchair in a gale, and we were all out for 113 in 28.2 overs — undone, frankly, by our own top order rather than anything especially sinister from theirs.

Eighty-three runs the wrong side of the ledger, then, and no dressing it up. Alex Keeler continues to lead our run charts with 376 for the season and Joshua Knowler tops the wickets with 28 — small consolations on a grim afternoon. Not our day. Heads up, and back to the nets.

Wed 17 Aug 2022 🧢 Midweek XIv Tunbridge Wells Wednesday CC · HomeformLLLTL

I'll host Tunbridge Wells Wednesday for the midweek fixture, and rarely has a toss felt so satisfying to win — I called correctly, elected to bat, and for once didn't spend the rest of the innings wondering if I'd made a dreadful mistake.

Jordan Austin set about the Tunbridge Wells attack with the calm assurance of a man who's clearly enjoying his summer, cruising to a well-made 63 and, in doing so, extending his hold on top spot in the 2022 Midweek XI run charts to a rather imperious 299 for the season. He found the perfect foil in Aaron Hughes, unbeaten on 40, and between them they simply refused to let the bowlers into the game. By the time we'd finished, 121 for the loss of a single wicket had gone up from just 14.3 overs — the sort of scoring rate that has opposition captains quietly recalculating their evening plans.

With that platform, and precious little time left to defend it, honours were shared — a draw that satisfied nobody and offended nobody, cricket's great English compromise. Tunbridge Wells will point out we never really tested them; I'd counter that with Austin and Hughes batting like that, why would we want to bowl at all.

A fine watch, a fair result, and one for the top of the runs table to remember. We'll settle for that, and reach for the tea urn with a clear conscience.

Sun 14 Aug 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Kent Royals (Hollingbourne) CC · HomeformWLWLL

A scorching afternoon, cloud doing nothing to take the sting out of it, as we welcomed Kent Royals (Hollingbourne) CC to Linton Park. The coin fell kindly and I had few qualms about asking the lads to bat first. Jordan Austin set the tone with a fine 63, Richard Piper chipped in a tidy 43 and Aaron Hughes weighed in with 34, but it was the seventh-wicket pair who did the real damage, stitching together a crucial 93 to carry us to a handsome 217 for 7 from our forty overs.

With the ball, we struck early, removing their opener for a single run, and later had both A H Russel and Daniyal Azmat trudging off for ducks — always a pleasing sight from the skipper's end, and I was fortunate enough to have a hand in matters myself, finishing with 3 for 9. Sam Boyns bowled beautifully in support, three maidens among his figures of 2 for 34, and Alex Wade weighed in with 1 for 31. Not a run given away lightly. But Habahd Ali, easing past his half-century to 70, and Moshi Chowdhury, unbeaten on a classy 64, shared 97 for the third wicket, with Kazi Munir's 22 adding polish, and between them they saw Kent Royals home.

Beaten by two wickets in the end — cruel arithmetic after such honest toil. Richard Piper continues to lead our 2022 Sunday 2nd XI run charts with 229, and I find myself second in the wicket standings with nine for the season. We'll be better for it next week.

Sun 14 Aug 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv OC Over the Moonrakers CC · HomeformWLWLL

I'm scorching, up! We won the toss and put them in to bat.

Wait — let me get this right and just write the report as requested.

I won the toss and, with the sky doing its best scorched-overcast impression, had no hesitation in sticking us in. It felt like the right call at tea, and it still feels like the right call now, even if the scoreboard tells a different story.

With the bat we ground out 174 all out in 33.3 overs — not a total to frighten anyone, but a fighting one. Archie Fairfax-Ross led the way with a well-made 44, and I chipped in with 43 alongside him, the pair of us doing what we could to give the total some substance. Spare a thought for poor Luke Welsman, who departed for a golden duck — these things happen to the best of us, and he'll get his day.

Defending 174 was always going to need everything to go right, and for a while it did, with Archie again to the fore, picking up 2-47. But Oliver Whiteley had other ideas, purring to an unbeaten 54, ably supported by Josh Norgrove's unbeaten 45 and Hugo Pike's 38, the pair of Whiteley and Norgrove putting on 57 for the second wicket to take the game away from us. A calamitous 19th over, in which we shipped two wickets but precious little pressure, was really where the match slipped from our grasp, and they cantered home on 175/2 with overs to spare.

Not our day, then — beaten by eight wickets, heads up, and back to the nets we go.

Sat 13 Aug 2022 🧢 2nd XIv SC St Lawrence CC · HomeformWWLWW

On a scorching afternoon we welcomed St Lawrence CC, and I couldn't have asked for a better toss to win. Richard Piper set about the bowling in glorious fashion, cruising to 81 in a proper captain's-dream innings, with Laurie Probert chipping in a tidy 34 and Matthew Carter finishing unbeaten on 26 to steer us to a handsome 249/7 from our 40 overs. It was the sort of total that makes the tea interval taste that much sweeter.

Defending it, though, is always the nervous half of the job, and I'll admit I spent most of it fanning myself in the field rather than doing anything useful — a personal 19 with the bat earlier being about the height of my contribution. Fortunately I had better men than me doing the damage: Nolan Wilde was simply unplayable, spinning his way to 5-36 and turning St Lawrence's middle order inside out, while Junaid Mufti (2-23) and Matthew Carter (1-4) mopped up round the edges. Paul Martin fought hard for his 55, but around him Chris Pedder, Neil Petch-Smith and Henry Gillespie all departed for ducks, and the innings subsided to 121/9 from their 36 overs.

A comfortable, thoroughly deserved win, and a fine advert for Nolan's season — now up to 15 wickets and second in the 2nd XI charts, with Richard's 337 runs still setting the pace at the top. Onwards indeed.

Sat 13 Aug 2022 🧢 1st XIv Meopham CC · AwayformLWWLL

Meopham CC on a scorching, blinding-bright afternoon — the sort where the outfield shimmers and the umpires start looking for shade before lunch is even mentioned. I put us in the field first, and for once the decision looked shrewd rather than merely stubborn. Meopham ground their way to 170/8 from their forty overs, Glyn Fortt top-scoring with a watchful 46, Nick Brown unbeaten on 33 and Ross Tucker chipping in 28. Mick Clark, by contrast, had an afternoon to forget, back in the pavilion for a duck. Thomas Roxburgh was superb with the ball, 3-33 of relentless, disciplined stuff, backed up nicely by Luke Welsman (1-18) and Tobey Castle (1-19) — an attack that kept Meopham honest all afternoon.

Chasing 171, we made light work of it, romping home to 174/6 in just 27 overs. Tobey Castle was magnificent, a chanceless 65 that did the bulk of the damage, with William Roxburgh's brisk 46 keeping the required rate firmly under control. I contributed rather less to proceedings, falling for a duck myself — the least said about that particular passage of play, the better.

Elsewhere in the season's ledger, Tobey Castle now sits fifth in the 1st XI run charts with 245, while Joshua Knowler continues to lead the wicket-takers with 23. As for Saturday: a thoroughly fine win, comfortably and cheerfully earned, ducks and all. Onwards.

Fri 12 Aug 2022 🧢 Midweek XIv The Dragons CC · HomeformDLLLT

Skipper's log, Friday 12 August: The Dragons CC rolled into Linton Park under a sky so blue and a sun so fierce you'd have thought we'd been transported somewhere rather more exotic than the village green. I won the toss and, with barely a cloud to trouble the groundsman, elected to bat — a decision I still maintain was the correct one, even if by the close I'd had cause to wonder.

We posted 160 for 4 from our 32 overs, a total built on the sterling efforts of Aaron Hughes, who made a fine 49 and continues to sit second in this year's Midweek XI run charts with 217 to his name. I chipped in with 29, and Toby Joseph finished unbeaten on 27 to give the innings some late impetus. Spare a thought for poor Jordan Austin, whose golden duck will live on in club folklore rather longer than he'd like.

With the ball, Nick Tromp led the attack superbly, snaring 2 for 19, with good support from Thomas Beeney (1-29) and Nolan Wilde (1-32). But the Dragons had an ace up their sleeve in Josh Mihill, who ground out a well-made unbeaten 73 and, ably assisted by T Pitts's unbeaten 38, saw them home to 161 for 4 with four overs in hand.

Not our day, then — beaten by six wickets, and beaten fairly. Heads up, chins high, and back to the nets we go.

Sun 07 Aug 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Town Malling CC · AwayformLWLWL

A warm one at Town Malling on the 7th, and I'll be honest, it read better on the forecast than it did on the scorecard. We were bowled out for 96 in 21.4 overs, which is the sort of total that has you studying your shoelaces rather than the opposition. My own 24 was as good as it got with the bat, and the Duck Club secretary had a busy afternoon logging Nick Pennefather, Frank Harbord and Anton Bourdillon all back in the hutch without troubling the scorers — three ducks in one innings is a hat-trick nobody wants.

With 96 on the board, we knew we needed something special with the ball, and for a while we had them worried, Anton Bourdillon striking early with figures of 1-5. But James Worrall settled in for an unbeaten 39, well supported by John Burbidge's 27, and Town Malling eased home to 99/1 inside 12 overs with barely a bead of sweat between them.

There was, at least, one moment to make the whole trip worthwhile: Martin Rivers brought up 1,000 career runs for the club, a landmark that deserves rather more fanfare than a soggy defeat allows. Richard Piper continues to lead our 2022 Sunday 2nd XI run charts on 186, and Anton Bourdillon's four wickets keep him ticking over in fifth on the bowling list.

Verdict: a chastening afternoon, but with ducks, milestones and lessons all present, at least there's plenty to write about.

Sun 07 Aug 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Egerton CC, Kent · HomeformWWLWL

There's no scorching sunshine quite like it for lulling a captain into false confidence, and Sunday's home fixture against Egerton CC, Kent gave us plenty of both warmth and hard lessons. Winning the toss and putting them in felt reasonable enough at the time, but Rob Sparks had other ideas, cracking a fine 70, with Steve Wellard (58) and Noah Middleton (45) keeping the scoreboard humming along nicely. We did have our moments in the field — Nick Waterhouse back in the pavilion without troubling the scorers, and I managed to find some rhythm with the ball for figures of 3-56, with Jordan Austin (1-30) and Thomas Beeney (1-36) chipping in dutifully. Even so, 293/7 from their 40 overs was a mighty total to chase, and by the time we walked off I suspect most of us were already doing the mental arithmetic and not liking the answer.

Our reply had genuine class about it, Henry Bourdillon batting beautifully for 90, well supported by Thomas Beeney (35) and Luke Welsman (28), while I added a workmanlike 18 further down. Poor Benjamin Austin will want to forget his golden duck in a hurry, and forget it he shall — these things happen to the best of us, and often at the worst moments. We fell short on 247/9 from 35.4 overs, a spirited effort that simply wasn't quite enough against a total of that size.

Beaten, then, but not remotely disgraced — Bourdillon's innings alone was worth the admission price, and with Jordan Austin second in the run charts and yours truly leading the wickets column this season, there's plenty to be cheerful about. Beaten this time. We go again.

Sat 06 Aug 2022 🧢 2nd XIv PC Pembury CC · AwayformLWWLW

Onwards to Pembury for a Saturday jaunt on 6 August, the skies doing that classic English trick of promising rain without ever quite delivering it. Winning the toss, I had no hesitation in taking first knock, and for once the decision looked as good three hours later as it had at the coin. Matthew Carter set the tone with a fine 45, Richard Piper (27) and Nick Pennefather (26) filled in the middle overs nicely, and the extras column — a generous 46 — did more heavy lifting than some of our specialist batsmen. Not every name will want this report framed and hung in the pavilion: Nick Tromp and Steve Puxty both trudged back for ducks. Still, 195 all out from our forty overs was a total with enough about it to defend.

And defend it we did. Pembury's Rohit Ippakayal batted beautifully for his 61, but around him the innings crumbled, with Madhav Suraj and Tom Mobbs both back in the pavilion without scoring. Nick Tromp, doubtless keen to make amends for his batting, ran through them with a superb 4-29, backed up handsomely by Richard Knowler (3-28) and Matthew Carter, who followed his runs with 2-17. All out for 134 in 30.1 overs — the job done with overs to spare.

A win by 61 runs, then, and a thoroughly satisfying one. Richard Piper continues to top our 2nd XI run charts for the season, with Richard Knowler now second among the wicket-takers — evidence, if any were needed, that Linton Park's engine room is running rather sweetly. Onwards indeed.

Sat 06 Aug 2022 🧢 1st XIv Cudham Wyse CC · HomeformWLWWL

A warm, bright afternoon greeted Cudham Wyse CC at home, and I'd love to tell you it stayed that way for us. We mustered 130 all out in 25.3 overs, which on paper looks respectable until you realise three of us — Jordan Austin, Toby Hughes and Aaron Hughes — contrived to get out without troubling the scorers at all. Thankfully Luke Welsman's 29 gave the innings some backbone, with Tobey Castle (23) and Anthony Karassellos (23) chipping in to drag us to something resembling a total, even if it wasn't quite enough to frighten anyone.

And so it proved. Cudham Wyse strolled to 133/2 in 20.1 overs with time and wickets to spare, Junaid Mohammad the chief architect of our downfall with a fluent 45, well supported by Najaf Abbas (37 not out) and Ahsan Zeb (27). We did what we could with the ball — I managed to have Karassellos back among the wickets too, picking up 1-21 to lead our attack, with Joshua Knowler chipping in with 1-42 — but two wickets simply wasn't enough purchase on a surface that clearly favoured the chasers.

Elsewhere in the season, Alex Keeler continues to top the run charts with 371, and Joshua Knowler leads the wickets with 22 — proof that not everything is going wrong even when the results are. As for Saturday, there's no dressing it up: a defeat, and a fair one, but there's cricket yet to learn from it.

Thu 04 Aug 2022 🧢 Tour XIv Linton Park CC · HomeformWWWTW

Thursday brought Linton Park CC to our ground under skies that couldn't decide whether to rain or simply sulk, warm, drizzly and thoroughly English. The coin fell our way, and I opted to bat, reckoning that runs in the bank were worth more than anything the damp outfield might offer.

We mustered 125 for 6 from our twenty overs, a total that owed most of its shape to Tobey Castle's unbeaten 37, calm and composed while wickets fell around him. I chipped in with 21 of my own, happy to lend a hand before getting out of the way and leaving the rest to the bowlers.

Their reply began shakily, 5 for 1 inside the first few overs had us dreaming of an upset, but a stand of 85 for the third wicket put paid to that, Connor Campbell compiling a fine unbeaten half century with Ollie Marston keeping him honest company on 38 not out. I managed 2 for 18 with the ball, Darrell Houghton-Judge chipped in with 1 for 11, and poor Luke Murray was sent back without troubling the scorers. It wasn't quite enough. They reached 126 for 3 in 15.1 overs and took it by seven wickets.

Elsewhere, Tobey continues to lead our 2022 Tour XI run charts with 126, and I'm quietly pleased to be sitting second in the wicket takers' list with four scalps. As for Thursday, we were beaten fair and square, but there was enough fight on show to suggest we'll be better for it next week.

Wed 03 Aug 2022 🧢 Tour XIv WC Waresley CC · AwayformDWWWT

The lads gathered at Waresley CC on Wednesday 03 August 2022, and for once the coin behaved itself — down it came in our favour, and I had no hesitation in sending us in. It looked a shrewd call once Tobey Castle got going, an assured 77 the backbone of the innings, with Laurie Probert stroking a fine 52 alongside him and Benjamin Austin chipping in with 30. An 84-run stand for the fifth wicket was really the making of our total, and we closed on a handsome 262/7 from our forty overs — the sort of score that has you rubbing your hands together over the tea urn.

Defending it, though, proved rather more nerve-shredding than the arithmetic suggested it should. Waresley found their own gluey partnership, Jamie Fensome unbeaten on a classy 61, well backed by Joseph Barrett's 45 and Martin Harris's 37, the pair adding 124 for the fifth wicket and threatening to make a mockery of our afternoon's work. It took some tight, disciplined bowling to haul it back — Nolan Wilde led from the front with 1-23, and Martin Harris and Benjamin Austin lent stout support with 1-25 and 1-28 respectively — as the visitors were held to 254/5.

Eight runs. That's all that separated the sides at the close, which is either the width of a mistimed slog or the width of a good afternoon's cricket, depending on your nerves. On this occasion I'll take it as the latter — two points, thoroughly earned, and a report I was rather relieved to be writing in the win column.

Tue 02 Aug 2022 🧢 Tour XIv EC Eaton Socon CC · AwayformLDWWW

From the captain's chair, Tuesday 2 August 2022 — we headed out to Eaton Socon CC on a warm, showery afternoon, and having called correctly at the toss, I had no hesitation in sending us in.

Batting first, we posted 208 for 9 from our forty overs, built on a fine second-wicket stand of 63 with Joshua Knowler (32), Martin Rivers (28) and Darrell Houghton-Judge (26) all playing their part. Then, as so often happens on this ground, the wheels came off in alarming fashion — 76 for 2 became 96 for 5 before we knew what had hit us, and I contributed precisely nothing to proceedings, undone for a duck. Mercifully the extras column did more for us than I did, chipping in 34.

In the field we set about defending it, but Eaton Socon matched us blow for blow, reaching 208 for 11 themselves, anchored by Jj Hewitt's 43 and a stubborn eighth-wicket stand of 70 that threatened to win it outright. Sam Boyns was superb with the ball, 4 for 22, well backed by Alex Keeler (3 for 23) and Joshua Knowler, while poor Benjamin Austin endured a torrid afternoon behind the stumps, 10 byes going begging.

And so it finished level — dead level, not a run between us after a full day's honest toil. You cannot manufacture drama like that; cricket simply hands it to you. A tie is no one's idea of glory, but for pure theatre, it will do very nicely indeed.

Mon 01 Aug 2022 🧢 Tour XIv RC Reed CC · AwayformTLDWW

What a way to spend a grey Bank Holiday Monday – off to Reed CC, and by the close I was rather glad we'd made the trip. Winning the toss and batting, we set about assembling something respectable, and Luke Welsman led the charge in fine style with a well-crafted 69. I chipped in with an unbeaten 46 to help us on our way, and with a generous 29 extras thrown in for good measure, we closed on a healthy 198 for 7 from our forty overs. Not a bad platform at all.

Then came the small matter of defending it. Reed CC threatened to make a match of it through Om Dave, whose 38 formed the backbone of their reply, with useful support from Scott Nash (29) and Jacob Vincent (23). But this was the Joshua Knowler show. He turned it square, sending batsmen back to the pavilion in a bewildering blur, finishing with the frankly ridiculous figures of 5 for 20, including two tidy maidens for good measure. Tobey Castle (1-7) and Luke Welsman (1-19) mopped up admirably in support, and Michael Robertson and Will Archer both departed without troubling the scorers. Reed were bowled out for 165 from 38 overs, and the game was as good as up.

A thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work all round – runs on the board, a spinner in irresistible form, and a job done well before the tea urn had cooled. We got over the line comfortably, and that's a very good day for the club.

Sun 31 Jul 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv NC New Ifield CC · HomeformLLWLW

Lost the toss on a warm, damp Sunday and watched New Ifield elect to bat — never the outcome I'm hoping for when I call incorrectly in the middle, but there it is. We took the field with the sun doing its best through the drizzle, and I can't say I greeted 240/4 from their forty overs with much enthusiasm. Gregg Dassrath and Darren McGrath both went past their fifties, 72 and 71 respectively, with George Cranham chipping in 37 to give their innings real substance. Nick Pennefather was the pick of our attack by some distance, 2-23 and metronomic throughout, with Zach Wilde and Alex Holt each picking up a wicket apiece to keep things honest.

Chasing 241 was always going to ask questions of us, and while we found some good answers, we didn't quite complete the sentence. Will Thew played beautifully for his 65, the innings' cornerstone, and got fine support from Trevor Back's unbeaten 33 and Nick Pennefather's busy 30 not out — the same Pennefather earning his corn twice over on the day. Twenty-six extras rounded out a total of 182/3, respectable but ultimately 58 runs light. Elsewhere, Richard Piper continues his fine season, now second in the Sunday 2nd XI run charts.

A defeat, then, but not a chastening one — plenty of encouragement in defeat, and we'll be sharper for it next week.

Sun 31 Jul 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv HC Harbledown CC · AwayformWWWLW

There's a particular flavour of optimism required to trot out onto a warm, damp outfield at Harbledown and call it a good toss to lose, but that's club cricket for you. We were put into the field first, and did rather well to keep the hosts to 226/8 from their 40 — Sudesh Thakur (39), Henry Roberts (39) and Theo Bawtree (38) all threatened to run away with it before our attack hauled things back. Sam King led the way with 2-26, with Tobey Castle (2-48) and Thomas Beeney (2-55) chipping in to keep the total within reach. Reach, as it turned out, was the operative word.

Our reply never quite found its feet. Tobey Castle, having already done his bit with the ball, top-scored with a fine 46, well supported by Sam Boyns's 25, but around them the innings had a habit of collapsing in on itself — Mark Christmas, Sam King and Martin Harris all departed for ducks, three golden nothings in one scorecard being about as English an affliction as the weather. I managed a steady 17 in the middle of it all, though steady wasn't quite the order of the day, and we folded for 141 in 35.1 overs.

A defeat, then, and not one we can dress up as anything else. Elsewhere in the season's ledger there's cheerier reading — Jordan Austin sits second in the Sunday run charts with 237, and Thomas Beeney tops the wicket pile with 13 — proof the summer isn't a total washout even if this particular Sunday was one to file under "lessons learned" and quietly forget.

Sat 30 Jul 2022 🧢 2nd XIv FC Flimwell CC · HomeformLLWWL

Skipper's Log — Saturday 30 July 2022

Overcast skies, a decent covering of cloud, and I'll admit I had a little dart of hesitation at the toss before deciding to field first — happily, for once, the captain's hunch paid off. Flimwell battled to 142/6 from their forty, built around a watchful 41 from Martin Rigby and 37 from Alistair Newson, with Syeed Ansari unbeaten on 22 at the death. Edhan Gemmell will be less keen to relive his afternoon, back in the hutch for a duck. With ball in hand it was Richard Knowler who did the real damage, prising out two for 21, with Tim Thirkell (2-33) and the ever-parsimonious Junaid Mufti (1-17, two maidens and barely a run to be had) chipping in either side of him.

Chasing 143, we made an absolute mockery of the target, cruising home in 22 overs without losing a single wicket — the sort of chase that makes the tea afterwards taste that bit sweeter. Richard Piper set about the bowling with real relish for an unbeaten 72, and I was rather chuffed to play my part alongside him, finishing 59 not out myself. Ten wickets is about as emphatic as club cricket gets.

Quiet note for the scorers: Thirkell's two scalps nudge him past Terry Whittaker into 12th on the all-time list — a fine achievement modestly earned. Two points banked, thoroughly deserved, and a result to make the drive home feel a good deal shorter.

Sat 30 Jul 2022 🧢 1st XIv OC Outwood CC · AwayformWWLWW

Down at Outwood on a warm, grey Saturday, we lost the toss and were sent out to field first – never the news you want to hear when the sandwiches aren't even cut yet. Batting first ourselves was clearly the plan we'd have preferred, but Outwood had other ideas, and so it was pads on and out we trooped.

Our reply with the bat never quite got going. 113 all out in 35.5 overs told its own story, with only Luke Welsman offering any real resistance for his 33. Special mention, in the way one gives special mentions to things one would rather forget, to Joshua Knowler for his golden duck – 🦆 – though he'd more than make amends before the day was out.

Defending 113 was always going to be a stretch, and so it proved. We did threaten briefly, removing the opener for just 6, but a stand of 53 for the second wicket steadied Outwood's ship, and Mark Lane's unbeaten 64 saw them home. Joshua Knowler was magnificent with the ball, 3 for 47 with two miserly maidens thrown in – the one bright thread running through our afternoon. I chipped in with 15 of my own, for what little comfort that provided.

Elsewhere in the season, Alex Keeler continues to lead our run charts with 358, and Joshua Knowler tops the wickets column with 21 – proof, if any were needed, that not all was lost even on a day like this. Beaten by seven wickets, then, and no arguing with it. Heads up, chins up, and back to the nets we go.

Thu 28 Jul 2022 🧢 Twenty20v High Halstow CC · AwayformWWWLW

Between us, we shovelled a full house's tea urn's worth of nerves onto that road to High Halstow, and lost the toss for our trouble — no complaints from me, I've called it wrong enough times to know when to just get on with it. Put in to field on a warm, cloudy afternoon, we watched Adam Whatman play the innings of the day, a composed 51, with Joe Murray chipping in a handy 31 alongside him, and between them they carried High Halstow to a stiff-looking 145/6 from their twenty. Small mercies: we did for Chris Whatman without so much as a run to his name. With the ball, Luke Welsman was the pick of us with 2-32, Tobey Castle chimed in with 1-21, and I managed to prise out one for 23 of my own — proof, if nothing else, that the captain can occasionally do more than just get the field placings wrong.

Chasing 146 was always going to be a proper Thursday-night workout, and so it proved. Nick Tromp led from the front with a fine 41, well supported by Benjamin Austin's 34 — Austin now sitting proudly atop our season's run charts with 93 — but wickets kept tumbling at the other end, Henry Bourdillon and Sam King both departing for ducks, and by the time we reached 148 we had just one wicket, and precious little else, left in hand.

One wicket to spare, two points banked, and several fingernails sacrificed along the way — a win no less sweet for being scrappy, and exactly the sort of nerve-shredder club cricket was invented for.

Wed 27 Jul 2022 🧢 Midweek XIv The Mote CC · AwayformLDLLL

Skipper's Log — Wednesday 27 July 2022. Away at The Mote, and I won the toss for once — didn't waste time thinking about it either, straight into the field we went.

They posted 199/7 from their forty, built largely on a rather chunky 132-run stand for the sixth wicket between Matthew White (75 not out) and Jason White (53), with Matt Sadler chipping in 27. Credit where due — the bowling clawed it back into something respectable. Tobey Castle was superb with 4-18, John Karassellos took 2-31, Nick Tromp 1-26, and Alex Keeler bowled like a man allergic to boundaries, two maidens and barely a run leaked. Daniel Mason and Tobin Thomas both departed without scoring — the kind of ducks nobody puts in the club Christmas card.

Chasing 200, we replied with exactly 199 all out — close enough to taste it, not quite enough to swallow it. Henry Bourdillon top-scored gloriously with 77, Tobey Castle backed up his bowling with 33, and Jordan Austin added 32, the 53-run third-wicket stand the spine of the innings.

Milestones softened the disappointment: Henry brought up 1,000 career runs for the club, and Alex Keeler turned out for his 100th appearance in Linton colours — a proper club man if ever there was one. Jordan still leads our Midweek run charts, Tobey the wickets.

A tie. A whole day's cricket and not a run between us — cricket's way of telling both sides to shake hands and go home unsatisfied together.

Mon 25 Jul 2022 🧢 Twenty20v Headcorn CC · AwayformLWWWL

I chipped in with 20, though on this one it's the top order who deserve the garlands.

A warm, drizzly Monday saw us make the trip to Headcorn, where the toss went our way and we took first use of the ball. Headcorn posted a brisk 141/6 from their twenty overs, built chiefly around Jordan Vine's well-crafted unbeaten fifty, with useful support from Matthew Daniels (24) and Charlie Tresnan (22). Simon Phipps, mercifully for the rest of us, was sent back without so much as a sniff at the scoreboard. With the ball, Luke Welsman was the pick of the attack with 1-13, while Anthony Karassellos and I both chipped in with 1-16 apiece — enough to keep the total within reach, if not within comfort.

Chasing 142, we made rather harder work of it than the final margin suggests, though the drizzle and a soggy outfield can take some of the blame. Jordan Austin held the innings together with a composed 38 not out, Aaron Hughes matched him for calm with 30 not out, and Luke Welsman weighed in with 20. I added my own 20 to the cause, more through good fortune than good judgement, before the pair at the crease saw us home in the seventeenth over.

A six-wicket win, then, and one to file under "professional job, minimum fuss." Elsewhere in the season's charts, Benjamin Austin continues to climb the run-scoring table and Anthony Karassellos the wicket-takers' — both quietly building reputations while the rest of us just try to keep up. All in all, a good day for the club, and one we'll happily take home in the drizzle.

Sun 24 Jul 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv TC Tenterden CC · AwayformWWWWL

A grey, warm Sunday down at Tenterden, and the toss went our way — or rather, I put them in, which on reflection was either shrewd captaincy or blind optimism, depending who you ask by close of play. They batted through their 54 overs to post 205/5, built around a classy fifty from Edward Avann, well supported by Liam Fletcher's 41 and Carlin Smith's 39. It could have got away from us, but Sam King ran through their middle order with 2-37, while Nick Tromp and Tobey Castle chipped in with a wicket apiece, and Luke Welsman strangled the scoring with three tidy maidens. A tick over four an over to chase — stiff, but not silly.

Whatever nerves I harboured about the run chase evaporated early, and in truth I needn't have worried, because Benjamin Austin simply put on a batting clinic — 61 of the finest, and enough to keep him top of our 2022 run charts with 329 for the season. Jordan Austin's 32 and an unbeaten 31 from Luke Welsman, who clearly wasn't content with just bowling maidens, kept the required rate honest, and we cantered home to 208/6 with a full seven-and-a-bit overs unused. I contributed my small part with bat in hand along the way, though the day belonged to others.

A thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work, all told — disciplined with the ball, ruthless with the bat, and Tobey Castle now sitting third in the season's wicket-takers for good measure. Onwards indeed.

Sun 24 Jul 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Sissinghurst CC · HomeformLLLWL

I did the honours with 31 for one, and turned to Ryan Boyns as the pick of the attack.

Sunday 24th, and Sissinghurst CC rolled up on a warm, grey afternoon that promised nothing much either way. It didn't stay that way for long. Aaron Hughes decided this was his day and simply refused to get out, compiling a magnificent 105 not out — three figures, no less, the sort of innings that gets talked about at the bar for weeks. Laurie Probert chipped in a fine 44 and Martin Rivers a tidy 38, and between them we hauled ourselves to 255/4 from our 40 overs. A total, frankly, that felt like a small mountain to defend.

And defend it we did. Sissinghurst fought back gamely through Mike Burgess (39) and Jon Agar (38), but they never quite got the platform they needed. Mark Christmas was superb with 2-2 — and in doing so nudged past Terry Whittaker into 11th on the club's all-time wicket list, which is the kind of thing you only appreciate properly with a pint in hand. I managed to get among the wickets myself, sending one back for 31 runs. But it was Ryan Boyns who did the real damage, ripping through with 4-43 to leave Sissinghurst all out for 175 with overs to spare.

A win to savour, and no mistake. Hughes now sits proudly atop the season's run charts, and the tea urn has rarely tasted sweeter.

Sat 23 Jul 2022 🧢 2nd XIv FC Fordcombe CC · AwayformLLLWW

As Fordcombe put us in on a warm, cloudy afternoon, I can't say I was thrilled, but the lads knuckled down well enough to post 157/9 from our 40 overs. Nick Pennefather batted beautifully for his unbeaten 40, with Matthew Carter (33) and Richard Piper (30) chipping in handsomely around him. Poor Ian Hollingworth, meanwhile, was made to feel thoroughly unwelcome at the crease, departing for a golden duck — these things happen to the best of us, Ian, chin up.

With the ball, we scrapped hard. Hollingworth, clearly with a point to prove after his batting misadventure, led the attack superbly with 2-33, and got fine support from Carter (1-13) and Thirkell (1-21), the latter positively miserly with three maidens to his name. But Max O'Collins had other ideas, guiding Fordcombe home with a composed unbeaten 54, backed up by Zach Webb (25) and Richard Shackleton (21), as they reached 159/4 with seven balls to spare. Spare a thought too for Glen Rawson behind the stumps, who had a torrid time of it and shipped 8 byes for his troubles.

Elsewhere in the season, Martin Rivers continues to lead our 2nd XI run-scorers with 173, while Tim Thirkell tops the wicket charts with 24 — small consolations on an otherwise chastening afternoon.

All told, a six-wicket defeat and not our finest hour. Heads up, though — back to the nets, and on to the next one.

Sat 23 Jul 2022 🧢 1st XIv EC Eynsford CC · HomeformWWWLW

Saturday 23rd July, and Eynsford CC rolled up to Linton Park on a warm, cloudy afternoon that promised runs for somebody. The coin, as is tradition, betrayed me entirely, and the visitors elected to bat. What followed was a lesson in graceful acceptance of one's lot, as Matthew Williamson compiled a really rather elegant 98 not out, with Benjamin Donovan (41) and Johann Pienaar (25 not out) chipping in to see them to 196/4 from their forty overs. Credit where due, though: Alex Keeler was in miserly, metronomic form, returning 3-16 with three maidens, while Tobey Castle chipped away for 1-48.

Chasing 197, we could easily have wobbled, but Toby Hughes played the innings of the day — 53 sound, sensible runs — well supported by Aaron Hughes (40 not out) and Tobey Castle (28), the pair putting on 53 for the first wicket to give us something to build on. Twenty-eight extras arrived like an unexpected round at the bar, gratefully received. I contributed a workmanlike 16, more useful for the scoreboard than the highlights reel, and we squeaked home 197/7 with three wickets in hand.

A fine win, then, and a timely reminder that cricket is rarely won by the toss alone. Alex Keeler continues his quietly excellent season — second in the run charts, third with the ball — and the rest of us can only applaud from a respectful distance. Onwards.

Thu 21 Jul 2022 🧢 Twenty20v Rainham (Kent) CC · AwayformLLWWW

Down by three wickets to Rainham (Kent) CC, and I still can't decide who's more culpable — the openers who threw the coin toss to the winds, or the top order who threw their wickets away.

We lost the toss, were put in, and made a battling if unspectacular 96/8 from our twenty overs. Aaron Hughes was the rock at the other end, carrying his bat for an unbeaten 26 while wickets clattered around him — George Taylor, Luke Welsman and Pieto Swart all took the long, lonely walk back for ducks, which I'm reliably informed is now three names too many for the Duck Club ledger this season.

Ninety-six felt defendable, and for a while it was. Abishek Pushpavinothan was magnificent with the ball, ripping through with 3-8, and Fred Taylor chipped in admirably with 3-26. I managed to get among the wickets myself, snaring one for 19, and we even had the satisfaction of sending Sai Kasyap back without troubling the scorers. But Bimal Jose had other ideas, batting through unbeaten on 34 to see Rainham home at 98/7 with two overs in hand.

So, not our day — beaten by three wickets when it really shouldn't have taken more than a few sensible overs to see off. Toby Hughes continues to lead our run charts with 92, and Pushpavinothan tops the wickets with 6, so the season's silver linings remain intact even if my captaincy record isn't. Heads up, chins high, and back to the nets.

Wed 20 Jul 2022 🧢 Midweek XIv LX Lord Cornwallis Friendly XI · HomeformLLDLL

Wednesday 20 July 2022 brought our visitors to Linton Park on a warm, overcast afternoon, and I lost the toss — or won it, depending on how you view batting last — so out into the field we went. Their openers set the tone at once, putting on 74 for the first wicket, and Thomas Beeney simply refused to be shifted, contributing a well-made 61, then 56, then 31 more, as though determined to bat the entire card himself. They closed on 246 all out from 39 overs. Alex Keeler did the early damage with 3-42, Stuart Cheesman matched him with 3-43, and Tim Thirkell chipped in 2-41 to keep us honest.

In reply, we began nicely enough — 62 for the first wicket — before a collapse took us from 62-1 to 78-4 in the time it takes to make a decent cup of tea. Alex Keeler, having troubled them with the ball, now steadied us with an unbeaten fifty, well supported by Jordan Austin's 39 and Ian Cardew's 36. I had a torrid time behind the stumps, 21 byes slipping past me, though I made some amends with 22 of my own with the bat. The tail wagged nobly for a final 41, and 25 extras helped nudge us to 211/9 from our 40.

Thirty-five runs short at the close. Not our day, but heads up and back to the nets — Jordan Austin still leads our run charts with 204, and Tim Thirkell tops the wickets with 5, so there's plenty of fight left in this side yet.

Sun 17 Jul 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv NC Norton Sports CC · AwayformLLLLW

Beaten on the road at Norton Sports on a scorching, cloudy Sunday, and full credit where it's due: Daniel Marshall gave us an absolute lesson, 113 of pure quality, with Paul Kennard's well-made 53 and Ben Hogan's 26 keeping the scoreboard ticking along nicely at our expense. 256/5 from their 40 overs was a proper score, and short of a miracle there wasn't much between overs 39 and 40 that was going to change that story. We did claw back some respectability with the ball — Zach Wilde the pick of the attack with 1-18, Alex Wade and Nick Tromp both weighing in with a wicket apiece, and Tromp bowling beautifully tight, four maidens' worth of proper discipline.

Chasing 257 was always going to want something special, and though we gave it a decent go, 221/9 tells its own tale. Henry Bourdillon led the effort with a fine 44, well supported by Will Thew's 43 and Richard Piper's 40 — the top order doing its bit, at least. Less happily, Toby Joseph and Zach Wilde both fell for golden ducks, which is never a fun way to walk back to the pavilion. I contributed 27 myself, more workmanlike than watchable, but runs on the board all the same.

Elsewhere in the season, Richard Piper continues to lead our Sunday 2nd XI run charts with 160, and Tim Thirkell tops the wicket pile with 9 — both flying the flag while the rest of us catch up.

Beaten this time, no arguing with the scoreboard. We go again.

Sun 17 Jul 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Leeds & Broomfield CC · HomeformLWWWW

I dreaded winning the toss on a day that scorching, but I stuck us in to bat — the right call, I still maintain, whatever anyone says about batting first in that heat.

We got to 157, though "all out" tells its own story: 28.3 overs and three ducks on the card is not the stuff of Wisden. Aaron Hughes was the man of the innings with a fine 46, Jordan Austin chipped in a handy 32, and the two of them put on 57 for the third wicket while the rest of us took it in turns to admire the scoreboard from the pavilion. Benjamin Austin, Luke Welsman and Thomas Beeney will each know exactly which ball did for them, and I shan't embarrass them further here.

Defending 157 felt like a stretch from the start, and so it proved, though not without a fight. Monte McCague gave us the full village-green treatment with a superb 96, well supported by Clarry McCague's 32, and an opening stand of 64 set the tone before we clawed back with two quick ducks. I managed 3-28 with the ball, which I'm allowed one mention of and no more, Thomas Roxburgh weighed in with 2-24, Thomas Beeney took one, and Luke Welsman bowled two miserly maidens to keep the squeeze on as they wobbled from 155-3 to 157-6.

In the end, beaten by two wickets — heartbreakingly close, honestly earned. We'll be better for it next week.

Sat 16 Jul 2022 🧢 2nd XIv Penshurst Park CC · HomeformWLLLW

Saturday 16 July 2022, and a warm, grey afternoon greeted us for the visit of Penshurst Park CC — the kind of day that promises rain and delivers only humidity, much like my hairline these days. I lost the toss, they chose to bat, and off we went into the field with hope rather than expectation.

They ground their way to 139/9 from their 40 overs, Krishna Pitalla top-scoring with 28, well supported by Peter Lyddon's 26 and Tom Scott's 23. Shivaan De Silva and Scott Conway both fell for ducks, poor souls. But the day belonged to Tim Thirkell, whose 2-11 off four miserly maidens strangled the innings at both ends, with Inus Joubert (2-31) and Luke Welsman (1-19) chipping away at the other. A very disciplined shift in the field, and I'll take full credit for setting the fields, whatever the bowlers might say.

Then Glen Rawson and Richard Piper simply refused to give the visitors a sniff, knocking off 141 in 23.4 overs without so much as a hint of alarm — Rawson unbeaten on 64, Piper unbeaten on 55, both cruising to well-deserved half-centuries. Rawson now sits fourth in our 2nd XI run charts this season, while Thirkell tops the wicket pile with 23 — form that shows no sign of deserting either man.

Ten wickets to the good, and home in time for tea. A thoroughly good day for the club.

Sat 16 Jul 2022 🧢 1st XIv SC Speldhurst CC · AwayformLWWWL

Saturday 16 July 2022 saw us make the trip to Speldhurst CC on a warm, cloudy afternoon, and having called correctly at the toss, I had no hesitation whatsoever in sticking the pads on. It proved a shrewd call. Mark Christmas set about the Speldhurst attack for a fine 63, with Toby Hughes right alongside him for a classy 62 and Thomas Roxburgh chipping in with 44, the pair's 92-run stand for the fifth wicket the real engine of the innings. A defiant last-wicket flourish of 46 gave the total a proper coat of respectability, and with 32 generously donated in extras, we closed on a formidable 291/6. I should note, purely in the interests of accuracy, that I contributed a golden duck to proceedings — a captain is meant to lead by example, and on this occasion I led by example of what not to do.

Defending 291 is a pleasant problem to have, and Speldhurst never truly threatened it. Ollie Crees played beautifully for 55, including a huge six launched over mid-on, and found support from Ben Brandt (45) and Patrick McCahon (29), but once Thomas Roxburgh got among them with a superb 4-7, backed up by Alex Keeler (2-39) and Richard Knowler (2-66), the innings unravelled from 178-5 to 184-8 in the blink of an eye. All out for 189 in the 32nd over, with the game swinging decisively our way as three batters departed without troubling the scorers.

A touch too many half-volleys on our part let them play with more freedom than they deserved, but no matter — a 102-run win and two points, thoroughly and comfortably earned.

Wed 13 Jul 2022 🧢 Midweek XIv Penshurst Park CC · AwayformWLLDL

Wednesday 13 July 2022, away at Penshurst Park, and I did the sensible thing for once and put us in on winning the toss. Scorching, damp, faintly tropical conditions — the sort where the outfield races and your shirt doesn't dry between overs. We made hay: 310 for 3 off our 40, built almost entirely on a magnificent third-wicket stand of 213 between William Roxburgh, who batted right through for an imperious 161 not out, and Aaron Hughes, whose well-crafted 81 gave the innings its spine. Thomas Roxburgh finished unbeaten on 34 to see us home in style. Not everyone got among the runs — Toby Joseph contributed his customary golden duck, delivered, as ever, with good grace and the emoji to match. 🦆

Three hundred and ten looked like plenty. It wasn't. Penshurst's openers simply refused to leave, putting on 291 before we so much as troubled the scorers, James Beeny compiling a majestic 177 and Adam Ranson a chanceless 111 in support. By the time Anthony Karassellos prised out two for 43 and Nolan Wilde chipped in with one for 40, the damage was done, and they cantered past us to 314 for 4.

So, down by five wickets — a day where our batting deserved better than our bowling could defend. Jordan Austin continues to lead the run charts and Anthony Karassellos sits handily in the wickets, small consolations on a chastening evening. Heads up, chins high, and back to the nets — Penshurst simply batted better than we bowled.

Sun 10 Jul 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv NC New Ifield CC · AwayformLLLLL

Captain's log, and what a scorcher it was down at New Ifield — cloud cover doing nothing whatsoever to take the sting out of it. We won the toss and I elected to bat; call it instinct, call it luck, either way I'll take the credit while it's going.

We posted 152 for 7 from our forty overs, built on a lovely unbeaten fifty from Laurie Probert, well supported by Richard Piper's 42. Wes Fernandez and I both contributed ducks to the cause — not quite the support Laurie had in mind, though I'm told the strokeless nature of my innings was at least mercifully brief.

New Ifield gave it a proper go in reply, Gregg Dassrath cracking a fine 63, but they could only manage 144 for 6 from their forty. Harry Benning departed without troubling the scorers, and it was Anthony Karassellos who did the real damage — 3 for 20, including two miserly maidens — with useful support from Srikrishna Challa (1 for 15) and Ian Hollingworth (1 for 24). Poor Glen Rawson had a torrid afternoon behind the stumps, 17 byes testament to a pitch with ideas of its own.

Richard Piper continues to lead our Sunday 2nd XI run charts for the season with 120, while Anthony Karassellos sits second in the wickets column on 6. As for New Ifield, eight runs was all that separated us in the end — two points, thoroughly earned, and worth every drop of sweat in that heat.

Sun 10 Jul 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv OC Orpington CC · AwayformDLWWW

Sunday 10 July, and off we trundled to Orpington in that peculiar English blend of scorching sun and brooding cloud that only club cricket seems to conjure up. I lost the toss again — my coin-flipping record remains a source of great personal shame — and Orpington duly chose to bat.

Early doors it looked promising, a wicket down with just 4 on the board, but Anirudh Gaikwad had other ideas, compiling a fine 72 and, with Rahul Patel's 20 stiffening things up, dragging them to a 56-run stand for the sixth wicket. All out for 145 in 37.4 overs in the end, and credit where it's due: Tobey Castle was simply magnificent, ripping through them with 4-1, well backed by Thomas Beeney's 3-13 and Thomas Roxburgh's solitary but tidy 1-8. James Robinson, Arnav Shukla and Joel Joji, alas, all trooped back without so much as a run to their names — ducks all round, and no doubt some ribbing to follow in the clubhouse.

Chasing 146, we made an absolute mockery of it. Benjamin Austin (53 not out) and Toby Joseph (53 not out) simply refused to be parted, with Luke Welsman's brisk 23 not out sealing it in a canter — 149 without loss in just 17.5 overs. A special word for Tobey Castle too, who brought up 200 career wickets in the same afternoon — milestones and ten-wicket wins don't come along together very often.

Two points, thoroughly deserved, and a thumping victory to boot. On this evidence, long may the sun (and the cloud) keep shining on us.

Sat 09 Jul 2022 🧢 2nd XIv Shoreham & Otford CC · AwayformWWLLL

Here is the match report.

A warm, grey Saturday it may have been, but there was nothing dull about our afternoon at Shoreham & Otford. Losing the toss and being asked to bowl is never the news you want, but the lads set about their work with real purpose, and Richard Knowler in particular seemed to be operating on a different plane altogether — spinning his way to a remarkable 5-16, complete with three maidens that suggested the home batsmen simply had no answer for him. Nolan Wilde (3-43) and Tim Thirkell (2-33) mopped up admirably around him, and with Samuel Thomas and Chris Pollard both back in the pavilion without troubling the scorers, Shoreham & Otford's 156 all out from 38.5 overs — built mainly around Simon Wells' 46 and Will Bax's 21 — always felt a touch short of the mark.

Chasing 157, we made steady if occasionally scratchy work of it, closing on 159/3 from 29.1 overs for a comfortable seven-wicket win. Martin Rivers led the way with a fine 38, and I was glad to chip in with an unbeaten 32 alongside Nick Tromp's equally composed 29 not out as we eased home. Poor John Karassellos had a torrid time behind the stumps — 13 byes is not a number he'll want reminding of — but nobody begrudges the wicketkeeper a rough afternoon when the bowlers are in such form.

A word too for Richard Knowler, whose five-for nudged him up to 23rd on the club's all-time wicket-takers list. A thoroughly satisfying day out — onwards we go.

Sat 09 Jul 2022 🧢 1st XIv Sissinghurst CC · HomeformLLWWW

Off from Sissinghurst, and if you'd told me at lunch that overcast skies would settle it, I'd have called you a fool. We won the toss, and with the outfield offering a touch of encouragement I had no hesitation in taking first knock — a decision I stand by even now, dressing room grumbling notwithstanding.

William Roxburgh played the innings of the day, a fifty of real substance, while Thomas Roxburgh chipped in nicely alongside him. I found some form of my own with 30, though 188 all out from 39 overs always felt a par score rather than a match-winning one, not helped by Tobey Castle and Luke Welsman both departing for ducks — golden nothings that even the strongest club spirit can't dress up.

In the field we scrapped hard without ever quite landing the knockout blow. Toby Hughes was excellent, snaring 2-36 to continue what's shaping into a fine season with the ball, and Alex Keeler bowled with real discipline — four maidens and 1-14 — while Joshua Knowler picked up his own. James Rix fell to us without scoring, small consolation as Quentin Ferreira and Brough Cooper shared a commanding 96-run stand for the fourth wicket that put the result beyond us, Sissinghurst cantering home 189/5 by five wickets.

Not our day, then. Heads up, chins out, and back to the nets — there are lessons in this one, and plenty of season left to learn them.

Thu 07 Jul 2022 🧢 Midweek XIv CP Camellia PLC · HomeformWWLLD

Down by 1 run at Linton Park last Thursday, with a warm, cloudy sky watching over proceedings that will live long in the memory for how nearly they went our way.

Winning the toss, I opted to have first use of the ball — and for eighteen overs it looked a shrewd call. The visitors laboured to 103/7 from their twenty, with Tobey Castle the chief architect of their innings on 43, well supported by Darrell Houghton-Judge's 20. With ball in hand, Tobey Castle turned assassin, ripping through with 2 for 1, while Luke Welsman (2-5) and Davy Matthews (1-8) chipped in nicely — the latter pair also finding themselves back in the pavilion without troubling the scorers when their turn came to bat, ducks apiece, poor lambs.

Chasing 104, we made a fair fist of it: Aaron Hughes anchored proceedings with an unbeaten 22, Darrell Houghton-Judge and Toby Joseph both weighing in with unbeaten 20s, and your captain rattling along to 19. Martin Rivers, alas, departed for nought. We finished on 102/2 — one solitary run shy of glory, the kind of margin that makes you replay every dot ball on the walk to the car park.

Aaron Hughes continues his fine season, now second in the Midweek XI run charts with 82, and John Karassellos sits third among the wicket-takers with 3. As for us — heads up, chins up, and back to the nets. Not our day, but not far off it either.

Wed 06 Jul 2022 🧢 Midweek XIv Warlingham CC · HomeformWWWLL

Wednesday 6th July, and Warlingham CC rolled up to a ground that couldn't decide if it was sunshine or shower — much like my own mood on winning the toss. I put us in, a decision that for once didn't require several pints and a lie-down to justify, and the top order made me look rather clever.

Ian Cardew and Aaron Hughes put on 91 for the first wicket before anyone in green even got a sniff, and from there Cardew (76), Hughes (60) and Jordan Austin, unbeaten on 53, simply kept the scoreboard ticking merrily along to a handsome 260/6 off our 35. Declaring the bar well and truly set, we went out to defend it in the sort of drizzle that makes a captain's job easy: just point at the shiny end and hope.

Warlingham lost an early wicket with just 7 on the board and never quite found their feet, subsiding from 85-5 to 93-8 as the middle order came and went like buses — Roland Oliver and Howard Owens both back in the hutch without so much as a single to their name. John Karassellos was the chief architect with 2-16, nudging past 50 career wickets in the process, well supported by Thomas Beeney's tidy 2-23 (four maidens of pure parsimony) and Tim Thirkell's 1-12. I chipped in with a wicket myself, for what it's worth. Waseem Sherwani's unbeaten 33 dragged them to a battling 151/9, poor Aaron Hughes meanwhile shipping nine byes behind the stumps for his troubles.

In the end, honours shared: a draw when neither side would blink first — which, given the weather, felt about right.

Mon 04 Jul 2022 🧢 Twenty20v Rainham (Kent) CC · HomeformLLLWW

Right, the lads are all out at the crease...

Well now — Monday the 4th of July, warm and cloudy over the ground, and Rainham (Kent) rolled up looking rather pleased with themselves. I called it right at the toss, elected to bat, and for once nobody in the pavilion questioned the decision out loud, which for this lot counts as a ringing endorsement.

Abishek Pushpavinothan set about proceedings with a brisk 36, and had good company for the journey — Tobey Castle chipping in 31 and Thomas Roxburgh 30 — as we motored to 164/7 from our twenty overs. Not a total to frighten anyone into early retirement, but a defendable one, and defend it we duly did.

Rainham had their moments, mind. Stuart Chipperfield played the innings of the day with 45, Paul Swaine kept him honest with 36, and George Mottram saw them home to 140/7 unbeaten on 22 — though "home" is doing rather a lot of work in that sentence, since it wasn't nearly enough. Poor Jon Newton departed for a duck, which I mention only because he will never let us forget it if we don't. Fred Taylor was the chief tormentor with 2-14, Martin Harris weighed in with 2-18, and Toby Hughes picked up 1-25 to go with his season-leading run tally of 86.

Twenty-four runs the margin, and a thoroughly satisfying one. Onwards, as ever.

Sun 03 Jul 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv BC Bobbing Court and Lower Halstow CC · HomeformWLLLL

Sunday the 3rd of July, and the heavens couldn't quite decide whether to smile on us or not — warm with a threat of showers, and Bobbing Court and Lower Halstow evidently the sunnier side of the coin toss, which I duly lost. They chose to bat, and made themselves thoroughly at home.

Trevor Earl set about us with a magnificent 138, cheered along by Lewis Ball's fifty (82) and Jacob Smith's unbeaten 31, while their openers put on 200 before the first wicket fell — the sort of platform we could only admire from a respectful distance in the field. I found some rhythm with the ball at least, finishing with 3-41, with Tim Thirkell (1-46) and Alex Holt (1-57) chipping away gamely. 308/5 from 40 overs is a mountain by any village measure.

Chasing it, we never really got going. Richard Piper's 46 was the innings' one shaft of sunlight, well supported by Wes Fernandez's unbeaten 26, but with the first wicket down for nought and yours truly contributing a duck of my own — the less said, the better — we folded for 128 in 37.2 overs. Alex Holt kept me company in the Duck Club ledger. Poor Theo Clements, meanwhile, spent the afternoon chasing 14 byes round the ground.

Richard sits third in the season's run charts, Tim tops the wickets — small mercies. Down by 180 runs, then: not our day. Heads up, and back to the nets.

Sat 02 Jul 2022 🧢 2nd XIv LC Locksbottom CC · AwayformWWWLL

Saturday 2 July took us down to Locksbottom CC, under skies that couldn't decide between sunshine and sulk — drizzly, but pleasant enough for cricket, or as pleasant as these things get. I called correctly at the toss and, in a rare fit of decisiveness, chose to bat.

It wasn't quite a stroll. We limped to 149/9 from our forty overs, rescued largely by Laurie Probert's fine 44 and Junaid Mufti's supporting 38. Elsewhere the ledger made less happy reading — Martin Rivers and John Karassellos both walked back for ducks, quacking their way onto the club's least-wanted list.

With the ball, we started brightly enough — I took 1-7 myself, and Srikrishna Challa did the real damage with 2-38 — but Locksbottom's openers put on 68 without loss and never really let us back into it. Charlie Buck's unbeaten 47, with useful support from Minesh Patel (36) and Chris Trevatt (32), carried them home in 27.3 overs. John Karassellos had a torrid time behind the stumps, ten byes leaking away like sand through fingers, while I chipped in a modest 16 with the bat for good measure.

There are crumbs of season-long comfort: I sit atop the 2022 2nd XI run charts with 170, and Challa is up to fifth in the wicket-takers' list with six. But none of that softens a defeat by seven wickets. Not our day, lads — heads up, and back to the nets.

Wed 29 Jun 2022 🧢 Midweek XIv SC Sevenoaks & District Wednesday CC · HomeformLWWWL

Wednesday the 29th of June brought Sevenoaks & District Wednesday to Linton Park on one of those pleasant, showery afternoons that keeps you glancing at the sky and hoping the covers stay in the shed. I won the toss and elected to bat, and for once I shall permit myself a small pat on the back for that decision, because what followed was rather splendid. We posted 205 for 7 from 37.3 overs, built almost entirely around a magnificent, unbeaten century from Jordan Austin, ably supported by Tim Wright's 52. Their third-wicket stand of 109 was the innings in miniature. Less gloriously, Tobey Castle and Thomas Beeney both took the long walk back for ducks — the Duck Club ledger duly updated, and I daresay neither will let the other forget it.

In the field we gave everything, and I'm rather pleased to say I chipped in with 2 for 25 and three maidens, with Tim Thirkell matching those figures and Alex Keeler picking up one. But Oliver Barnes had other ideas, batting through for a superb unbeaten 113, well supported by Ashwani Arora and Keith Stone, and a fourth-wicket stand of 57 saw them home at 206 for 5. Poor John Karassellos had a torrid time behind the stumps, 16 byes testament to a pitch with a mind of its own.

There was real cheer amid the defeat, though: Tim Wright brought up 5,000 career runs for the club, a landmark worth savouring long after the scoreline fades. Beaten by five wickets, then — but we'll be better for it next week.

Sun 26 Jun 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv WC Wye CC · AwayformLWLLL

The road took us to Wye on Sunday, under skies grey enough to make you wonder if the tea urn would see more action than the covers. Still, we won the toss, and I elected to bat — the right call, I still maintain, whatever the scorebook eventually had to say about it.

We posted 157 for 8 from our forty overs, a total built largely on Toby Joseph's fine half-century, with the extras column doing its bit too — 29 sundries is either generous bowling from the opposition or a tribute to our own leg-side eccentricities, and I shan't speculate which. It felt like a defendable score as we trooped off for tea, cautiously pleased with ourselves.

Wye, however, had other ideas. Harry Linin made a well-crafted, unbeaten 53, ably supported by Jago Mitford's 47 and Neil Williams's unbeaten 22, and between them they chased the total down with overs to spare — 161 for 3 in 32.2 overs told its own story. Tim Thirkell was the pick of our attack, 2 for 20 with two tidy maidens thrown in, and Anton Bourdillon chipped in with a wicket too, but it wasn't enough to stem the tide. For what it's worth, I currently lead our Sunday 2nd XI run charts this season with 81, while Tim tops the wickets with 7 — small crumbs of comfort on a day that offered few.

Beaten by seven wickets, then, and no arguing with it. Heads up, back to the nets, and on to the next one.

Sun 26 Jun 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Borstal CC · HomeformLDLWW

There are afternoons when you win the toss and afternoons when you don't, and on Sunday against Borstal CC we most emphatically fell into the latter camp, asked to have a bowl in what turned out to be pleasant, overcast conditions rather nicer than the scorecard suggested we deserved. Borstal's openers helped themselves to 104 before we so much as troubled the scorers, David Round easing to 54 and Thomas Tingley and Lewis Allan chipping in with 46 and 43 respectively as they racked up 207/6 from their forty overs. Just when it looked ominous, I found a bit of rhythm to take 2-7, with Amjad Hussain departing without troubling the scorers, and Tobey Castle and Thomas Beeney weighed in with a wicket apiece to drag things back to something chaseable.

Chasing 208, we set about it with rather more conviction than I'd dared hope for, the openers putting on a crucial 64 before the first wicket fell — Srikrishna Challa the unlucky one to depart for nought. From there Tobey Castle played the innings of the day, a superb 85, with Jordan Austin lending fine support on 41. I added an unbeaten 33 down the order to help see us home with 209/5 and overs to spare, 37.1 of them in the end.

A thoroughly satisfying five-wicket win, then, built on a fighting bowling effort and a chase full of character. Onwards indeed.

Sat 25 Jun 2022 🧢 2nd XIv SC Sennocke CC · HomeformLWWWL

Beaten this time — but by heaven, we made them work for it.

We won the toss on a pleasant, overcast afternoon at home to Sennocke CC and settled in for a proper 40-over grind. Runs came in fits and starts rather than a torrent, and 150/9 felt about right for a pitch that never quite gave its secrets away. Srikrishna Challa top-scored with a well-made 33, Martin Rivers chipped in a tidy 26, and I was there at the end with an unbeaten 26 of my own, doing rather more nurdling than striking. A defendable total, we told ourselves, if we bowled with discipline and kept our nerve.

We did not keep our nerve for long. Arthur Sackville West decided the afternoon belonged to him and simply refused to be parted from the crease, racing to 77 not out, while Dan Callingham gave him fine company with a crisp 65. Between them they turned our 150 into something resembling loose change, and Sennocke cantered home in a brisk 18.3 overs with only one wicket down. Alex Wade was our lone bright spark with the ball, prising out that solitary breakthrough for 22, but even his best efforts couldn't stem the tide.

Elsewhere in the season, Martin Rivers continues his fine form, now sitting second in the 2nd XI run charts, and Alex Wade is third among the wicket-takers — small consolations on a chastening day. Beaten this time. We go again.

Sat 25 Jun 2022 🧢 1st XIv BC Bidborough CC · AwayformWLLWW

Saturday 25th June, away at Bidborough, and the weather did its best drizzly-village-green impression while we got on with business. Winning the toss, I had no hesitation in taking first knock — the right call, as it turned out, even if the rain tried to have its say. Tobey Castle led the way with a fine 32, Joshua Knowler unbeaten on 26 kept things ticking nicely, and Aaron Hughes chipped in with 21. I managed to add a little something of my own with the bat along the way, which I shan't dwell on further. Extras chipped in a princely 30 — practically our fourth-highest scorer, and no doubt gratefully received. Spare a thought for poor Toby Joseph, though, who suffered the walk of shame for a duck; the ducks were flying at Bidborough today. We closed on 156/7 from our 40 overs, a total that felt defendable if not imperious.

And defend it we did. Toby Hughes was quite simply unplayable, turning the ball square for a magnificent 5-40, backed up admirably by Richard Knowler (2-20) and Alex Keeler, who bowled two tidy maidens on his way to 2-34. Edward Gray's 37 and James Baldock's 23 were the only real resistance Bidborough could muster, while Dan Slade, Anthony Bouffe and George Van Der Westhuizen all joined the growing list of afternoon ducks. They folded for 117 in 29.5 overs.

A 39-run victory, then, and a thoroughly good day for the club — drizzle, ducks and all.

Wed 22 Jun 2022 🧢 Twenty20v High Halstow CC · HomeformWLLLW

Wednesday 22 June, and a warm, clear afternoon greeted us for the visit of High Halstow CC — the sort of day that makes you glad the tea urn's already on. I lost the toss, as is tradition, and duly found myself sent out to field, which at least spared my top order the indignity of watching me bat first.

Not that we minded. High Halstow limped to 118/6 off their twenty, never quite getting away from us. Jamie Maguire's 43 was the innings' backbone, with Clarke Dockwray unbeaten on 23 and Adam Whatman chipping in 20, but our attack kept a lid on things throughout. Alex Keeler was the pick of the bunch with 2-18, well backed up by Abishek Pushpavinothan's 2-21 and Anthony Karassellos's 1-18 — a proper team effort with the ball, and nothing for the batters to really sink their teeth into.

Then came the formality. Toby Hughes strolled to an unbeaten 60 — a genuinely fine half-century — with Benjamin Austin lending capable support with 41, and between them they knocked off 119 in a positively indecent 11.1 overs, losing just the one wicket along the way. Hughes now sits proudly atop the season's run charts, with Keeler leading the wickets column, and on this evidence neither looks likely to be dislodged soon.

Two points, thoroughly earned, and a stroll of a nine-wicket win. If only every Wednesday were this straightforward.

Sun 19 Jun 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Tonbridge CC · AwayformWLDLW

Called it right for once at the toss — and with the skies doing their best impression of a Kent drizzle machine, batting first seemed the only sensible course of action. Tonbridge's ground did its bit for atmosphere while Richard Piper simply got on with the serious business, unbeaten on 56, well supported by Luke Welsman's 28. Less serious business was conducted by Jordan Austin and Sam King, both back in the pavilion for ducks before they'd troubled the scorer, but 181 all out from our forty overs felt like a total with some substance to it.

Defending it meant a long afternoon in the field, though Tonbridge's reply never quite got away from us. Liam Wolters battled to a fifty of his own, but wickets kept tumbling at the other end — Vijayaraghavan Parthasarathy fell for nought — and they were all out for 141 in 36.1 overs. I had one of those days where everything comes out right off the seam, finishing with 3-14, with Ian Hollingworth (2-26) and Jordan Austin (1-13, two tidy maidens) doing the honest graft alongside me. Poor Aaron Hughes had a torrid time behind the stumps, 11 byes the unwelcome souvenir of his afternoon.

I chipped in with 18 of the runs too, and rather more pleasingly brought up 5,000 career runs for the club — while Ian Hollingworth marked his 100th appearance in Linton colours, a landmark bordering on the heroic. A fine, honest 40-run win, and a very good day for the club indeed.

Sat 18 Jun 2022 🧢 1st XIv Bearsted CC · HomeformWWLLW

Here is the match report.

It's not often I get to declare us unbeatable, but on a warm, wet afternoon against Bearsted CC I rather think we managed it. Winning the toss, I fancied our chances in the field, and the lads didn't let me down. Bearsted were shot out for 132 in 35.5 overs, with only Ben Johnston's 47 giving the innings any shape. The real story with the ball was Martin Harris, who bowled beautifully for 4-15 including four maidens — the sort of spell that has opposition batters muttering into their tea. Tobey Castle and Alex Keeler chipped in with a wicket apiece to keep the squeeze on throughout.

Chasing 133, we barely broke sweat. Openers Dave Charlton and Will Terry never had the chance to get off the mark — because I never let them out of the pavilion in the first place, batting through with Alex Keeler to seal it in 22 overs without losing a wicket. I made 76 not out, easing past a well-earned fifty, while Alex played the ideal foil with an unbeaten 46. Ten wickets in hand at the close says it all really.

A thoroughly satisfying day's work all round — bowled with discipline, chased with composure, and not a single alarm along the way. Bearsted will have gone home wondering what hit them; we simply went home for tea, very pleased with ourselves indeed.

Sun 12 Jun 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv HC Harrietsham CC · HomeformWLWLL

There's a heavy blustery cloud over Linton Park but not a drop fell, and I've rarely seen the lads bowl with such relish. Winning the toss and bowling first looked a bold call when Raymond Burt got stuck in for 31, well backed by Haider Ali's unbeaten 25, but Harrietsham's middle order simply had no answer to us. Fred King, Nathan Jones and Joby George all trooped off for ducks, and Tim Thirkell was a menace all afternoon, 3-11 with five miserly maidens thrown in for good measure. Inus Joubert chipped in with 3-39 and Junaid Mufti 2-36, and 134 all out from 31 overs felt, at tea, like a total we ought to have chased down without alarm.

We did not chase it down without alarm. Quite the opposite. David Castle's 29 was the one substantial contribution in a reply that never found its rhythm, and poor Trevor Back's golden duck rather summed up our afternoon at the crease. I managed to add a little to the cause myself, though not nearly enough to spare our blushes, and 96 for 9 from 27.3 overs was as far as we got before the overs ran out on us.

Small consolations arrived by post rather than by scoreboard — I find myself second in the 2nd XI run charts with 79 for the season, and Tim leads the wicket-takers with five, proof at least that not everything about this Sunday was gloom. But a match in which the ball did all the talking and the bat fell silent is, in the end, a defeat we shall have to learn from.

Sun 12 Jun 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Stone-in-Oxney CC · AwayformLWLDL

Sunday 12th June saw us make the trip to Stone-in-Oxney, under grey but perfectly agreeable skies for cricket. I lost the toss, which these days feels less like bad luck and more like tradition, and we were duly invited to field first.

We stuck to our task well. Henry Pelling Smith top-scored for the hosts with a watchful 28, with Patrick Watsham chipping in 24 alongside him, but at the other end wickets kept tumbling — Owen Piper departed without so much as troubling the scorers, and Stone-in-Oxney never quite got away from us, closing on a modest 141 for 9 from their 40 overs. I had the good fortune to finish with 2 for 18, with Ian Hollingworth (2-19) and the ever-miserly Anthony Karassellos (2-26, including two maidens) squeezing the runs out of the game in equal measure.

Chasing 142, we made light work of it. Benjamin Austin played the innings of the day, an unbeaten 65 that carried us home, ably supported by Henry Bourdillon's 45 — though Austin's afternoon behind the stumps was rather less serene, with 15 byes leaking through for good measure. We cantered over the line by 8 wickets with overs to spare, finishing on 142 for 1.

A quietly satisfying note for the diary: those two wickets nudged me past Trevor Back and into 14th on the club's all-time list, while Austin continues to lead our Sunday run charts handsomely. A thoroughly good day out for Linton Park — professional in the field, ruthless with the bat, and home in good time for tea.

Sat 11 Jun 2022 🧢 2nd XIv SC St Lawrence CC · AwayformLLWWW

There are days when I put the opposition in and it looks like genius by tea, and days when it looks like the folly it always was — Saturday at St Lawrence was emphatically the latter. Winning the toss and choosing to field felt bold under overcast skies; James Porter had other ideas, cruising to 68 with Chris Pedder (39) and Andrew Bujtor (26) chipping in as their total swelled to a hefty 228/9. I can't claim the tactics were vindicated, but I can at least claim some personal satisfaction — 4-59 for the skipper, with Tim Thirkell (2-26) and Davy Matthews (2-42) doing their bit to stop the total running away completely.

Chasing 229 was always going to ask questions of our batting, and the answers were not encouraging. Nick Tromp battled hardest for 21, but support was thin on the ground, and the Duck Club welcomed Martin Rivers and John Karassellos into its ranks with the customary lack of ceremony. Twenty-one byes said everything about the wicketkeeping afternoon poor Glen Rawson endured, and while our extras column's 41 was easily our top score, that's not the kind of statistic you build a scorecard round. All out for 116 in 31.3 overs told the story plainly enough.

A 112-run beating, then, and no dressing it up. Still, Nick Tromp continues to climb the 2nd XI run charts and Tim Thirkell leads the wickets — the season's not lost, even if Saturday certainly was.

Sat 11 Jun 2022 🧢 1st XIv Meopham CC · HomeformWWWLL

It was overcast, we were put in the field, and by the close it felt like Meopham had been invited round simply to make up the numbers.

Losing the toss and being asked to bowl first is never the news a captain wants on a Saturday, but the lads set about it with real purpose. An early wobble at 5-1 could have been the start of something ugly, and George Bruce and Jon Pollard both trooped back for ducks, but the bowling attack simply refused to let Meopham settle. Richard Knowler was the pick of them with a superb 2-2, backed up handsomely by Joshua Knowler (2-19) and Junaid Mufti (2-28), while Alex Keeler bowled two maidens so mean you'd think he was trying to save on the tea bill. Hugh Bryant (23) and Ross Tucker (22) did what they could to drag the innings towards respectability, but 110 all out in 32.5 overs was never going to trouble us unduly.

And so it proved. Alex Keeler, in the sort of form that's seen him climb to second in the season's run charts, batted through unbeaten for a classy 38, with Toby Hughes (28 not out) and Tobey Castle (25) lending sturdy support — the pair's 62-run second-wicket stand doing the real damage. We cantered home on 111/2 with overs to spare.

An eight-wicket win, then, achieved with minimum fuss and maximum tea consumed. Onwards we go.

Sun 05 Jun 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv HC Hythe CC · AwayformWLWLD

Chasing 229 was always going to ask questions of us, and Jordan Austin did his level best to answer them with a superb 96, well supported by Benjamin Austin's 26. But wickets fell at the other end at inconvenient intervals, with Sam Boyns and Thomas Beeney both departing for ducks, and we stalled on 178/9 from our 37.3 overs, some 50 runs shy of the target.

So it's back to the drawing board, though the season table offers some consolation: Benjamin Austin sits proudly atop the run charts with 108, and I lead the wicket-takers with 5 — small crumbs, but crumbs nonetheless. Beaten this time, no question. We dust ourselves down, put the kettle on, and go again next week.

Sun 05 Jun 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Chelsfield Park CC · HomeformWWLWL

A pleasant, drizzly afternoon at home to Chelsfield Park CC, and I'll admit the drizzle rather suited the mood of what followed. We huddled to 170/8 from our forty overs, rescued from a distinctly ordinary total by Aaron Hughes's unbeaten 43, with Trevor Back's 33 and David Castle's 28 lending proper support. Davy Matthews and Saad Ansari both contributed golden ducks, which is one way of describing nothing at all, and we can be grateful the extras column chipped in a handy 25 — nearly a top-order innings in itself.

With the ball, we gave it everything but Chelsfield had other ideas, reaching 173/5 in 38.2 overs to seal it. Shankar Swaminathan's fifty was the innings that did for us, well backed by Vijay Ganesh's unbeaten 43 and Rahul Sarkar's 31 — a batting effort that rather made light of our bowling. Tim Thirkell was the pick of our attack with 1-21, Davy Matthews chipped in with 1-24, and I managed to have my say too, taking 1-29 for my afternoon's work.

Elsewhere in the season, Aaron Hughes continues to lead our 2022 Sunday 2nd XI run charts with 81, and Ian Hollingworth sits third in the wicket-takers with 2 — small consolations on a day when the runs simply weren't there. A defeat, then, and one to learn from rather than dwell on.

Sat 04 Jun 2022 🧢 2nd XIv PC Pembury CC · HomeformLLLWW

With that total in the bank, the pressure was rather on Pembury, and to their credit — or rather to ours — they never got near it. Tom Mobbs's 29 and Amit Kumar Singh's 25 were the only real resistance, with Benjamin Parsons unbeaten on 22, but we sent Harry Mobbs, Daniel Niblett and Freddie Mobbs back for ducks as the innings folded to 114 all out in 32.5 overs. Anthony Karassellos was magnificent, tearing through with 4 for 25 including two miserly maidens, well supported by Junaid Mufti's 3 for 5 and Anton Bourdillon's 1 for 9.

A day when everything clicked, the sun stayed out, and the tea urn will have earned its keep. We got over the line comfortably, and if you can't enjoy an afternoon like that in this game, you're playing the wrong sport.

Sat 04 Jun 2022 🧢 1st XIv Cudham Wyse CC · AwayformLWWWL

A pleasant, showery afternoon at Cudham Wyse CC, and I'll confess I feared the rain more than the bowling. We batted first and posted a solid 219 all out from our forty overs, built on the back of Aaron Hughes's fine 51, with Mark Christmas (45) and Toby Hughes (41) both playing their part. Less gloriously, the Duck Club ledger grew heavier still, with Martin Harris and Richard Knowler both making that most dispiriting of walks back to the pavilion without troubling the scorer.

Two hundred and nineteen looked a defendable total, and for a while our attack made it look that way. Richard Knowler was the pick of the bowlers with 2-26, well supported by Martin Harris (1-34) and Joshua Knowler (1-48), and we did at least have the satisfaction of sending Fahad Karim back for a duck of his own. I chipped in with 18 with the bat earlier, for what it was worth. But Cudham Wyse had other ideas: Najaf Abbas led the chase superbly with 77, backed by fine half-centuries from Ahsan Zeb (56) and Arslan Shiekh (51), and they eased home to 222/4 with two overs unused.

There were bright spots amid the gloom — Toby Hughes brought up 1,000 career runs for the club, and Richard Knowler passed 400 career wickets, both fine landmarks worth raising a glass to. I remain top of the 2022 run charts with 280, and Joshua Knowler leads the wickets with 11. But the result was the result: a defeat, and one to learn from.

Sun 29 May 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Gravesend CC · HomeformWWWLW

Down by 88 runs, Sunday 29th May – Gravesend CC at home

We won the toss, and with the sky doing its best impression of a wet flannel I stuck the lads in the field. Right call, I still maintain, even if the scorebook rather disagreed with me by close of play. Gravesend made themselves thoroughly at home, racking up 244/7 from their 35 overs, with Suraj Sanger's fifty the backbone of the innings and V Bhoombla unbeaten on a well-crafted 54 of his own, ably assisted by Bhargav Khanna's unbeaten 41. Ramanjit Bajwa did at least oblige us with a golden duck, which on a day like this counted as a minor triumph. Edward Seymour was the pick of our attack with 2-32, with Tim Thirkell and Sam King chipping in for one wicket apiece, honest toil on an afternoon when the ball wasn't exactly hooping about for us.

Chasing 245, we made a decent fist of it without ever quite threatening the required rate, closing on 156/8 from our 35. I'm rather pleased to report 68 of those came off my own bat — the sort of innings that reminds you why you keep turning up on cold, drizzly Sundays. Edward Seymour again did his bit with an unbeaten 31, and Theo Clements added a tidy 28, while poor Alex Holt was undone for a duck of his own.

Not our day, then — beaten by 88 runs, heads up, and back to the nets. There's runs and wickets enough in this side to trouble better teams than us on a drier afternoon.

Sat 28 May 2022 🧢 2nd XIv FC Flimwell CC · AwayformWLLLW

Saturday 28 May 2022 saw us take the road to Flimwell CC, under skies that couldn't quite decide whether to rain or shine — a proper English compromise of an afternoon. We lost the toss, were sent in to bowl, and for once that felt less like a punishment and more like an invitation.

And how the lads took it. Flimwell were bowled out for a modest 89 from 36 overs, James Knight's 34 the only real resistance, while three of their number trudged off without troubling the scorer at all. Tim Thirkell was magnificent, tearing through with 4-19 and, in doing so, quietly nudged past Trevor Back into 13th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list — a fine bit of history made on a showery Saturday. Srikrishna Challa (3-1) and the ever-parsimonious Richard Knowler (1-7, three maidens) squeezed the life out of the innings from the other end.

Chasing 90, we cantered home at 93/1 in just 16.1 overs, Martin Rivers leading the way with 32 before Nolan Wilde (32 not out) and Nick Tromp (23 not out) saw us over the line with barely a bead of sweat between them. Poor John Karassellos had a torrid time behind the stumps, nine byes leaking away, but nobody was counting once the winning runs were struck.

Nine wickets, two points, and thoroughly deserved. A day when everything simply clicked — we'll take that kind of cricket every time.

Sat 28 May 2022 🧢 1st XIv OC Outwood CC · HomeformLLWWW

Here's the report:

A drizzly Saturday it was, and a soggy coin at that, which duly landed against me — Outwood chose to bat and we trudged off to field, optimism dampened but not extinguished. Mark Lane made us pay for it in full, compiling a magnificent 106, and found a willing ally in Louis Russell-Watts (40 not out), the pair adding 103 for the third wicket while the rest of us stood about admiring the scenery. Ashley Middleton chipped in with 22, and Outwood closed on a stiff 196 for 4. Credit where due: Toby Hughes bowled beautifully for 2-41, backed up by Alex Keeler and Tobey Castle, and at least Matthew Norman departed for a duck at our hands — small mercies.

Chasing 197, we made a decent fist of it without ever quite threatening. I chipped in with 48 at the top, Toby Hughes followed up his bowling with 43, and Alex Keeler added 34, but the middle order rather fell away — Tobey Castle, Luke Welsman and Anthony Karassellos all suffered the walk of shame for nought, and we were bowled out for 186 in the 40th over. Fittingly, the runs leaked square all afternoon on both sides, our bowlers and batters alike a touch too short and duly punished off the back foot.

Ten runs the margin, in the end — close enough to torment us on the drive home, not close enough to console us. We'll be better for it next week.

Sun 22 May 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv WC Wadhurst CC · AwayformLWWWL

Sunday 22 May 2022, and the road took us to Wadhurst CC — a fixture that always promises a good tea and, if we're lucky, a decent game to go with it. We lost the toss, were duly invited to field first, and had to make do with pads on the wrong end for once.

With bat in hand we set about building something substantial. The openers gave us exactly the sort of platform captains dream of and rarely get, putting on 75 for the first wicket before the breakthrough came. Jordan Austin anchored things beautifully with an unbeaten 51, Darrell Houghton-Judge chipped in a fine 41 and Aaron Hughes added 38 — though poor Anton Bourdillon will want this report kept well away from him, departing for a golden duck. Still, 214/5 from our 32 overs was a total to bowl at.

And bowl at it we did. Wadhurst never recovered from an early stumble at 5-1, and though Josh Kemp fought hard for his 57, wickets fell steadily around him — Fred Milsom and Jamie Crawford both back in the hutch without scoring. Anthony Karassellos was the pick of the attack with 3-10, Aaron Hughes backed up his batting with 2-16, Srikrishna Challa took 1-11, and Nick Tromp squeezed the life out of things with two maidens. Wadhurst were bowled out for 115 in 39.4 overs.

Ninety-nine runs the margin, two points the reward, and thoroughly deserved both.

Sat 21 May 2022 🧢 2nd XIv FC Fordcombe CC · HomeformWWLLL

Saturday 21 May, and we welcomed Fordcombe CC under a sky that couldn't quite decide whether to spoil the party — pleasant enough, if you like your cricket overcast and your captain slightly anxious. I lost the toss, as is tradition, and we were put in.

We crawled and occasionally sprinted to 174/9 from our forty overs, a total that felt modest walking off but grew more handsome with every over that followed. I managed 48 at the top, glad of the platform a good opening stand of 50 gave me, with Richard Piper (28) and Richard Knowler (27) both chipping in to see us to something defendable, if only just.

Defend it we did, by the finest of margins. Fordcombe threatened to make a mockery of our total when Richard Shackleton set about us for a fine 72, and a stand of 70 for the third wicket with support from Rory Marples (32) and Owen Horsford (29) had our nerves thoroughly jangled. But Tim Thirkell, bowling like a man possessed, returned 4 for 33 to drag us back into it — and in doing so climbed past Martin Harris into 13th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list, which is the sort of statistic that makes a long afternoon in the field worthwhile. Pieto Swart and Alex Wade chipped in with a wicket apiece, and poor Ashley Worcester departed for a golden duck.

Fordcombe fell agonisingly short on 173/8. A win by one run — the sort that ages a captain ten years and is worth every grey hair. Onwards.

Sat 21 May 2022 🧢 1st XIv EC Eynsford CC · AwayformWLLWW

Down at Eynsford on Saturday, under skies that couldn't quite decide whether to rain on our parade, we lost the toss and found ourselves out in the middle with the bat regardless — never one to complain when the openers oblige. And oblige they did: seventy-five for the first wicket, a proper platform, before Toby Hughes (37) and Alex Keeler (36) kept the innings ticking along nicely. I managed 41 myself, more by application than artistry, and we closed on a healthy 189 for 7 from our forty overs — the sort of total that lets a captain sleep easy at tea.

Eynsford's reply never quite got going. A wicket with just one run on the board set the tone, and poor Ishtiaq Mehmood departed without troubling the scorers at all. Johann Pienaar (47 not out) and Alfie Wheeler (35) did their best to steady things, but Joshua Knowler was in irresistible form, spinning through the order for 5 for 25, with Anthony Karassellos (4 for 25) mopping up at the other end and Martin Harris squeezing out two miserly maidens. Eynsford were all out for 135 in 35.4 overs — comfortably short.

Rather splendidly, Knowler's five-for also nudged him past John Thirkell into 20th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list — a nice bit of history alongside the win. I lead the 2022 run charts with 214 to my name, and Knowler tops the wicket table with 10; long may that friendly rivalry continue.

Fifty-four runs the margin, two points banked, and thoroughly deserved. A proper team performance — I'll take that all season.

Sun 15 May 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Offham CC · AwayformWLWWW

Sunday 15 May 2022 took us to Offham CC, and having called correctly at the toss I had no hesitation in choosing to bat first — with hindsight, perhaps the only correct decision I made all afternoon.

We posted 134/7 from our 40 overs, a total that always felt somewhere between par and prayer. Trevor Back top-scored with a tidy 33, well supported by Neill Pennefather's 28 and Richard Piper's 22, but the middle order rather let the side down, with both Davy Matthews and Theo Clements departing for ducks. A few more of those and we'd have needed a search party rather than a scorebook.

Defending 134 was always going to require discipline, luck, and probably divine intervention — we got none of the three. Offham strolled to 135/0 in just 12 overs, John Olufawo unbeaten on a chanceless 73 and David Sibley keeping him company with an equally polished 52 not out. Both fifties arrived with the ruthless efficiency of men who knew exactly what they were doing, which is more than can be said for our bowling changes.

On the bright side, Trevor Back's 33 nudges him up to 4th in the 2022 Sunday 2nd XI run charts — a lone candle in an otherwise dim afternoon.

Ten wickets down, heads bowed, we trudge back to the nets. Not our day, lads — but there'll be another Sunday.

Sun 15 May 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv EC Exiles at Ash CC · HomeformWWLWL

I put us in to field the moment the coin fell right, half-hoping the Ash canteen would keep the rain off long enough to make it worthwhile. It rather did, in that thoroughly English way of ours — a wet Sunday afternoon that never quite committed to washing us out. Exiles at Ash CC batted first and made a fair fist of it, Ben Rutherford top-scoring with 44 and James Millignan chipping in 39, with Nathan Ruegg unbeaten on 27 as their innings closed on 178/8 from the full 40. Their second-wicket pair put on a chunky 60 before we finally prised things open, 117/3 becoming 133/6 in a hurry once the wickets started tumbling. I was pleased enough with my own contribution of 2-22 to lead the attack, with Anthony Karassellos (2-24, plus two tidy maidens) and Toby Hughes (2-36) doing the rest of the damage — not a run given away lightly, whatever the final total suggests.

Henry Bourdillon had a torrid time of it behind the stumps, gamely standing up to a barrage that cost us 14 byes and no doubt a testing conversation with the square leg umpire.

With the bat, we managed only 17/1 from 5.2 overs before the heavens made the decision for us, and honours were shared. A draw, then — the great leveller of village cricket, and on a soggy afternoon like this one, perhaps the fairest result either side deserved.

Sat 14 May 2022 🧢 2nd XIv Penshurst Park CC · AwayformWWWLL

Saturday took us down to Penshurst Park under grey but obliging skies, and for once the coin actually landed my way — a rare enough event that I nearly forgot what to do with it, before remembering that batting first was indeed the plan. Junaid Mufti set about the bowling with real purpose for a fine 58, and Srikrishna Challa chipped in handsomely with 44, while Alex Wade finished unbeaten on 26 to nudge us to a respectable 195 for 7 from our 40 overs. As for my own contribution, the less said the better — I trudged out, trudged back, and trudged into the Duck Club ledger with a golden blob, leading, as ever, from the front in exactly the wrong direction.

Defending it should have been a tidy afternoon's work, but Adnan Qureshi had other ideas, batting beautifully for an unbeaten 94, well supported by Hugh Freese's 40, and between them they simply outlasted us. Tim Thirkell toiled hardest for 1 for 27, with Nolan Wilde chipping in at 1 for 37 — and doing so in some style, reaching the landmark of 50 career wickets along the way, a lovely bright spot on an otherwise grey day. Twenty-five wides and no-balls gifted away, though, told their own sorry tale, and the opposition cruised home on 198 for 2.

So, eight wickets the wrong side of the result, and a captain whose bat contributed rather less than his blushes. Not our day. Heads up, chin out, and back to the nets.

Sat 14 May 2022 🧢 1st XIv SC Speldhurst CC · HomeformLWLLW

Daniel Thirkell here, filing this month's despatch from a grey but perfectly pleasant Saturday at Linton Park, where we welcomed Speldhurst CC for what turned out to be a rather satisfying afternoon's work.

The coin let us down, as it so often does, and we were asked to field first. No complaints from this quarter — forty overs later Speldhurst had crawled to 160/8, a total that flattered them more than troubled us. Ben Brandt's unbeaten 28 was the backbone of their innings, with James Hughes chipping in 24, but our bowlers kept things admirably tight throughout. Anthony Karassellos was the pick of them, snaring 2-12 with two miserly maidens thrown in for good measure, while Joshua Knowler and Toby Hughes both picked up a couple apiece. Harry Dunmall departed without troubling the scorers, which is always a pleasant sight from square leg.

Chasing 161, we made light work of it, wrapping things up at 164/3 in just 28.1 overs. I found some form with the bat, carrying my innings to 77 not out — the sort of day where everything you middle finds the gap — while Craig Sands (38) and Mark Christmas (33 not out) built the platform either side of a fine second-wicket stand of 61. Toby Hughes's golden duck was the only blot on an otherwise rosy scorecard.

A comfortable seven-wicket win, then, and a thoroughly agreeable way to spend a Saturday. Onwards to the next one.

Sun 08 May 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Wingham CC · AwayformLWWLW

Sunday took us down to Wingham CC, and my coin-tossing form remains as reliable as ever — I called wrong, and we were put into the field on a pitch that, in hindsight, we'd rather have batted on ourselves. Andrew West made us pay for it in the most emphatic fashion, compiling a magnificent 112 not out, while Michael Pilbeam kept him company with a fine unbeaten 51 and Noah McLennan chipped in with 46. The openers set the tone with 61 for the first wicket, and by the time Wingham declared their innings closed at 275/3 from 40 overs, the damage was well and truly done. Sam Boyns was our pick of the attack with 1-40, and I did my modest bit with 1-61.

Chasing 276 was always a tall order, but 72 all out in 22.5 overs was a chase that never got out of the blocks. We slid from a wobbly 49-5 to a calamitous 67-8 in the time it takes to put the kettle on, and there was no way back from there.

Amid the wreckage, one shaft of sunlight: Aaron Hughes brought up 3,000 career runs for the club, a landmark worth raising a glass to. Elsewhere, Darrell Houghton-Judge continues to top our season's run charts with 91, and I find myself lurking in fourth on the wicket charts with a solitary scalp to my name.

Beaten by 203 runs, then — a proper hiding. We'll dust ourselves down and come back stronger next week.

Sat 07 May 2022 🧢 2nd XIv Shoreham & Otford CC · HomeformWWWWL

A drizzly Saturday and Shoreham & Otford CC in town for it — the sort of afternoon that makes you wonder whether you've picked a cricket match or a duck pond. We put them in, and David Jarratt made us pay for the decision, ticking past his fifty on the way to 61, with Jonathan Pennington Legh keeping him honest at the other end for 46. All out for 156 off 38.2 overs was a fair result for the effort we put in, even if the scorebook took a while to get there. Tim Thirkell was the pick of the attack with 3-45, Anthony Karassellos bowled beautifully mean with 2-14 and four maidens, and Ian Hollingworth chipped in with 2-24. Two ducks along the way for their batsmen, which we won't pretend not to enjoy.

Chasing 157 should have been within our compass, but our reply never quite got going. Martin Rivers battled hard for 40 and I found some form of my own with 30, but wickets fell around us and we were bowled out for 135 in 37.2 overs — Matthew Carter and Tim Thirkell both back in the pavilion without troubling the scorer.

There were bright spots off the field of play: Alex Wade reached the landmark of 50 career wickets, and Thirkell's afternoon's work eased him past Martin Harris into 14th on the all-time list. Small consolations on a day that ultimately got away from us. A defeat, then, and a fair one — we were second best with bat and edged it with ball, but not by enough. Onwards.

Sat 07 May 2022 🧢 1st XIv Sissinghurst CC · AwayformLLWLL

We travelled down to Sissinghurst on a showery Saturday, the sort of afternoon where you check the sky as often as the scoreboard. I won the toss and had no hesitation in asking them to bat first — the right call, I felt, and one I was rather pleased with myself for making.

Sissinghurst built steadily to 184/9 from their forty overs, the innings carried by a fine century from Quentin Ferreira, ably supported by James Rix's 27. Andrew Knowler and Jon Agar both fell for ducks at our hands, while Joshua Knowler was the chief architect of the discomfort, taking 3-18 and bowling four miserly maidens into the bargain. Junaid Mufti (2-30) and Martin Harris (2-49) chipped in handsomely too — a proper team effort with the ball.

Chasing 185, we made light work of it, cruising to 188 without loss in 36.1 overs. I was pleased to lead from the front with 91 not out, and Alex Keeler matched me stroke for stroke with a splendid unbeaten 81 — between us we barely left the opposition a sniff.

Worth noting: Joshua Knowler's three wickets nudged him past Tony Gauna to 22nd on the club's all-time wicket-taking list, a nice footnote to a fine day's bowling. Ten wickets in hand, two points banked, and a thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work — Sissinghurst won't remember this one fondly, but we certainly shall.

Sun 01 May 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Offham CC · HomeformWLWWL

Won the toss, opted to field – on a pleasant, damp Sunday, that's not a decision, it's a duty. Offham CC duly obliged our bowlers with 135/6 off their forty, though not before Ryan Ward decided he fancied an unbeaten 72 and Sam Tucker chipped in a tidy 21. Somewhere in there Marcus Rodrigues walked back to the pavilion for a golden duck, which is never a pleasant walk to watch. Will Thew did the early damage with 2-0, while Luke Welsman (1-7) and Thomas Beeney (1-8, four maidens and mean as you like) squeezed the runs out of the rest of the order. All told, 135 felt gettable, and gettable is a lovely word to hear at tea.

What followed was less a run chase than a demolition. Benjamin Austin and Aaron Hughes simply strolled to the middle and helped themselves — 82 not out and 41 not out respectively — as Offham's bowlers served up short stuff that we cut and pulled with the enthusiasm of men who'd been promised cake. We got there in 24.1 overs for the loss of precisely nobody.

Two points, and thoroughly deserved. A ten-wicket win is the sort of scoreline that makes the drive home feel shorter and the pub afterwards feel earned. Offham will have learnt what we already know: bowl short at Benjamin Austin at your peril.

Sat 30 Apr 2022 🧢 2nd XIv TC Tunbridge Wells CC · AwayformTWWWW

Coming off the toss the wrong way against us was never going to make life easy, and so it proved as Tunbridge Wells CC settled in to bat on a pleasant, cloudy afternoon and simply carried on batting. Tim Eaden made hay in some style, motoring to a well-deserved hundred, while Tim Luckhurst's fifty and Pieter Booyse's 42 gave the innings a spine that never really bent. A brutal opening stand of 144 set the tone before we so much as got a look in, and by the close they'd racked up 257 for 3. Credit where it's due — Nolan Wilde bowled tidily for 2-25, and I did what I could to keep an end quiet for 1-23, though quiet wasn't really the order of the day.

Chasing 258 was always a tall order, and so it proved. Craig Sands top-scored gamely with 39, and I chipped in with 33 as we put on 69 for the second wicket and, briefly, dared to dream. But cricket has a way of humbling the optimist, and a horrible clatter of wickets from 82-2 to 87-5 put paid to any notions of a great escape, with three of us — Nick Pennefather, John Karassellos and Nolan Wilde — departing without troubling the scorers. All out for 120 in the 30th over told its own story.

A chastening 137-run defeat, then, and not much to dress it up as anything else. Heads up, chins up, and back to the nets we go.

Sat 30 Apr 2022 🧢 1st XIv Meopham CC · HomeformWLLWL

Here's the match report:

We took the field on a pleasant, cloudy afternoon against Meopham CC, and after winning the toss I opted to field first — the right call, I felt, though our attack made me look wiser than I probably am. Meopham piled on 213/3 from their forty overs, with David Pollard (74 not out) and Kevin Smith (71 not out) putting together the kind of unbroken stand that has captains reaching for the scorebook and sighing. Glyn Fortt chipped in with 35, while Hugh Bryant departed for a duck at our hands — small mercies. Tobey Castle led the way admirably with 1-19, Alex Keeler and Darrell Houghton-Judge weighed in with a wicket apiece, and Anthony Karassellos was positively miserly with three maidens.

Chasing 214, we made a fair fist of it without ever threatening to get there, bowled out for 164 in 32.5 overs. Benjamin Austin's 34 was the innings' backbone, well supported by Alex Keeler's 32 and Anthony Karassellos's 22, but a middle-order collapse — 14-1 crumbling to 21-4 almost before anyone had sat back down — did for us. Luke Welsman's golden duck summed up the mood rather neatly, and my own 16 will not trouble the highlights reel.

Beaten by 49 runs in the end — a fair result on the day, and one that flatters neither our batting nor my sense of tactical genius. We'll be better for it next week.

Sun 24 Apr 2022 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Chelsfield Park CC · HomeformLWLWW

A pleasant Sunday it was for the visit of Chelsfield Park CC, and for once the sun turned up to watch us play, which felt only right.

Batting first, we posted a solid 247/8 from our forty overs, built on the back of Luke Welsman's fine 47, with John Karassellos (34) and Alex Wade, unbeaten on 34, giving the innings real substance. The extras chipped in a generous 28, which I like to think of as our twelfth man having a decent knock. My own contribution, if you can call it that, was a duck — the sort of dismissal that makes you very interested in the scorebook's small print and rather less interested in eye contact with the rest of the dressing room.

Defending the total, we bowled and fielded with real purpose, restricting Chelsfield Park to 164/7 despite useful knocks from Lenin Jeyaraj (42), Shankar Swaminathan (40) and Sudipto Das (33) — we did for Senthil Pandian without troubling the scorer. Alex Wade was outstanding with the ball, 3-17 including two miserly maidens, and I chipped in with 1-15 alongside good support from Ian Hollingworth's 1-21.

As for the skipper's day with the bat — a golden blob, which is not the example one hopes to set, though thankfully leadership is judged on more than one column of the scorebook. A win to savour nonetheless, and proof that a captain can fail spectacularly and still watch his side prosper.

Sun 24 Apr 2022 🧢 1st XIv Sibton Park CC · AwayformWWLLW

Beaten this time. We go again.

Sunday saw us make the trip to Sibton Park under a bright, benevolent sky — the sort of afternoon that promises a good game and, in our case, delivers a chastening one. Put into the field, we watched Harry Wren compile a fluent 42, with Ben Allon (41) and Steven Rowe (30) offering sturdy support as Sibton closed on a competitive 165 for 8 from their forty overs. Credit where it's due, though: our attack had its say too. Toby Hughes was magnificent, ripping through with 4 for 14, Martin Harris chipped in with 2 for 37, and Alex Keeler bowled with the miserly discipline of a man who begrudges every run, sending down three maidens. Three Sibton batsmen — Phil Coombs, Joshua White and Graham Bingham — will have gone home wondering where their innings went, each dismissed without troubling the scorers.

With 166 to chase, our reply never quite found its rhythm. Tobey Castle top-scored with a battling 21, but wickets tumbled around him, Joshua Knowler and Mardey Castle both departing without scoring, and we were all out for 94 in the 30th over — well short of the target. I managed my own small contribution along the way, for whatever comfort that's worth against a scoreline like that.

So it's a defeat to chalk up and move past. Aaron Hughes continues to sit second in our run charts, Toby Hughes tops the wicket-takers — proof there's plenty to build on. Beaten this time. We go again.

Sat 23 Apr 2022 🧢 1st XIv Headcorn CC · HomeformWWWLL

There's a particular pleasure in a Saturday that starts grey and blustery and ends with the scorebook in our favour, and this was one of those. Winning the toss and batting first felt like the right call, and so it proved, though it was Luke Welsman who did the real convincing, striding past his fifty and finishing unbeaten on 78 to anchor us to 178 for 6 from our forty. Aaron Hughes (26) and Richard Piper (24) built handy platforms either side of him, though poor Laurie Probert will want this page torn out before it reaches him — a duck to add to the ledger, and not the good kind of waterfowl.

Defending 178 always asks a question of the bowling, and Headcorn CC set about answering it through Bhanuka Senasinghe, whose well-crafted fifty (51) threatened to make a mockery of our total, with Charlie Tresnan (43) keeping him honest company. But we chipped away — Anthony Karassellos was the pick of the attack with 2 for 16, backed up nicely by Junaid Mufti (2-26) and Darrell Houghton-Judge (2-31), and somewhere in among the fielders' cries of anguish, Danny Demarzo trudged off for a golden duck of his own. I added a tidy 20 with the bat for good measure, which I shall mention only the once before modesty reasserts itself.

Headcorn fell short on 153 for 6. A win to savour, and a fine way to spend a blustery afternoon.

Sun 17 Apr 2022 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Mersham Le Hatch CC · HomeformLWLWW

Sunday 17 April 2022, cloudy skies, and Mersham Le Hatch rolling up the drive to face us. I won the toss and had no hesitation in taking first knock — the right call, if I do say so myself, and for once nobody argued with the skipper.

We posted a handsome 219/6 from our forty overs, built around a wonderfully composed 82 not out from Darrell Houghton-Judge, who simply refused to get out. Srikrishna Challa chipped in with 26 and Thomas Beeney kept his end tidy with an unbeaten 26 of his own. Spare a thought for poor Luke Welsman, who contributed nothing but a golden duck to proceedings — these things happen to the best of us, Luke, and there's always next week.

Defending 219 is never a formality, and so it proved. Mersham Le Hatch chased it down with something to spare, finishing 220/4 off 39.3 overs, Jordan Godden making merry with an unbeaten 95 and Alex Markwick weighing in with a fine fifty of his own (53 not out), Jeremy Godden adding 27. Thomas Beeney was our chief threat with the ball, 2-23, well supported by Srikrishna Challa's 1-33, while Anthony Karassellos bowled two miserly maidens and gave nothing away cheaply. Tom McKellow, alas, joined Luke in the duck club.

Beaten by six wickets in the end — a good total undone by an even better chase. We'll dust ourselves down and be better for it next week.

Sun 06 Feb 2022 🧢 Friendly XIv Bearsted CC · HomeformWWLWW

Bearsted came calling on a cool, damp Sunday, and Linton Park won the toss and, in what may have been our only unambiguous piece of good judgement all afternoon, put them in. The plan very nearly worked to perfection: Anthony Karassellos steamed in for 2-14, with Sam Boyns (2-22) and Martin Harris (1-28) chipping away, and only Christian Roberts, with a defiant 33, kept the visitors afloat. All out for 85 in 8.4 overs — poor Simon Barker back in the pavilion without so much as a single to his name.

So far, so promising. Then we batted. Anthony Karassellos, clearly determined to do everything himself, top-scored with 20, but the rest of us rather lost the plot, folding for 61 in nine overs — Sam Boyns, hero of the field an hour earlier, departing for a duck of his own. Honesty compels me to note that extras, on 25, were our second-highest scorer, which tells its own sorry tale.

That tale is confirmed by the small print: 20 wides and 6 no-balls gifted away, generosity we simply cannot afford against sides who know what to do with it. Beaten by 24 runs, then — a match we bowled ourselves into a winning position for, then batted ourselves out of. Karassellos leads both the runs and, alongside Boyns, the wickets this Friendly XI season, so all is not lost. We'll be better for it next week — we rather have to be.