🧢 Captain's Log

Sat 23 Sep 2023 🧢 Friendly XIv Town Malling CC · HomeformLLWDL

Saturday brought Town Malling CC to Linton Park under a grey but perfectly agreeable sky, and having won the toss I did what any captain with a scrap of sense does on a slow, grey afternoon — I stuck us in.

It came off rather nicely. Benjamin Austin and Neill Pennefather put on 90 for the first wicket before anyone troubled the umpire, and when the breakthrough finally came it barely dented us: Austin motored serenely to 51 not out, with Aaron Hughes matching him stroke for stroke on 50 not out, and Pennefather's 36 rounding out a total of 186 for 8 from our 35 overs. Only poor Euan Beardwell had cause to hang his head, back in the hutch for a duck and into the ledger for all to see.

Defending it, we bowled with real discipline. Town Malling never got away from us and eventually folded from 109 for 7 to 112 all out in 33.1 overs, Glen Baker's 29 and Lucas Dick's 24 the only real resistance. Daniel Barrett and Steve Sutton departed without scoring, Sam King bowled two tidy maidens, Laurie Probert and Alex Wade chipped in, and I had the pleasure of finishing with 2 for 25.

A thoroughly satisfying 74-run win, then — and with Aaron Hughes topping the run charts and Tim Thirkell second among the wicket-takers this season, the form guide, unlike my knees after fielding, is looking rather good.

Sun 17 Sep 2023 🧢 Friendly XIv Brockley CC, London · HomeformLLLWD

Sunday brought us Brockley CC at home, under skies that couldn't decide between sunshine and drizzle, rather like our afternoon's fortunes. I won the toss and, fancying some early swing in the damp air, put them in. It didn't quite work out as planned.

Josh McDonald set about us with real intent, cashing in for 83, and found a willing ally in Anand Kumar, unbeaten on a well-made 58. Ritesh Ritesh chipped in with a tidy 56 of his own, and between them that second-wicket stand added a chastening 110. I managed to get among the wickets with 2-30, and Martin Harris toiled hard for his 1-44, but 235/4 from 30 overs was always going to take some chasing.

Chasing it, sadly, is not quite what we did. Aaron Hughes fought the good fight with 37, well supported by Anthony Karassellos's 28, but wickets fell around them and we finished well short at 130/7.

There was one shaft of sunshine amid the gloom: Jordan Austin brought up 7,000 career runs for the club, a landmark worth raising a glass to regardless of the scoreline. Aaron Hughes continues to lead our 2023 Friendly XI run charts with 184, and Martin Harris tops the wickets with 7.

All told, a chastening 105-run defeat. Not our day, lads — heads up, and back to the nets.

Sat 16 Sep 2023 🧢 Friendly XIv Linden Park CC · HomeformWLLLW

Wed 16 September saw Linden Park roll up on a warm, overcast afternoon, and having won the toss I had little hesitation in sending us out to field first — the sort of decision that looks either shrewd or daft by close of play, though I still maintain it was the right call.

The visitors made themselves at home, reaching 244/5 from their 43 overs. Tom Corner played the anchor's role with a fine 63, while young James Corner kept him company with an unbeaten 55, and Etienne Saunders chipped in with 37 — the two Corners adding a crucial 80 for the third wicket that rather took the game away from us. I did manage to trouble the scorers with the ball, finishing with 2-48, while Nolan Wilde (1-30) and Tim Thirkell (1-36) shared the remaining spoils.

Chasing 245, we made a spirited fist of it, closing on 188/4 from our 44 overs. Aaron Hughes was in imperious form with an unbeaten 72, ably assisted by Richard Piper's 35 and Nolan Wilde's 29, the openers laying a flying start of 78 before the first wicket fell. Runs, alas, dried up thereafter, and the target drifted out of reach.

Two milestones lightened the mood: Aaron Hughes brought up 5,000 career runs for the club, and my two wickets nudged me up to 9th on the all-time list, past Tim Thirkell — small consolations on a day that ended, fittingly, in a draw. Honours shared, then, and no complaints from this captain.

Sun 10 Sep 2023 🧢 Twenty20v SC Sidcup CC · AwayformWLWWW

Not our day at Sidcup — down by 32 runs, and Sunday 10th September will go down as a match of two very different afternoons.

Winning the toss felt like the easy part, and I had no hesitation putting Sidcup in under overcast club-cricket skies. For a while it looked the right call, until Henry Walker decided to bat all twenty overs and remind us why he's a nuisance to bowl at, cruising to 74 not out and finding a willing ally in Bradley Sargent's 29. Credit where it's due, though: Harrison Fermor kept plugging away for 2-28, with Joshua Knowler and Fred Taylor chipping in a wicket apiece, and 144/5 could have been considerably worse given how set Walker was.

Chasing 145, we never quite found our rhythm. Benjamin Austin battled hard for an unbeaten 29 and Toby Hughes played his part with 27, but all-out for 112 in 18.2 overs tells its own tale — not helped by three ducks on the card for Abishek Pushpavinothan, George Taylor and Harrison Fermor, a trio who'll want the earth to swallow them before next Sunday.

Silver linings for the season charts at least: Toby Hughes remains top of the 2023 T20 run-scorers with 188, and Fred Taylor sits second among the wicket-takers with six. As for the rest of us — heads up, shoulders back, and it's straight to the nets. A day to learn from, not to dwell on.

Sun 10 Sep 2023 🧢 Twenty20v SK Simba CC, Kent · AwayformWWLWW

Here's the match report:

There's a particular kind of honesty in being asked to chase — no toss-winning bravado, just the captain's lot on a Sunday in Kent, trooping out to Simba CC and settling in for a long afternoon in the field. Tyrone Daley had other ideas about how quiet that afternoon might be, ambling to a well-made 75 and dragging the total along to a stiff 134/5, with Romario Grant chipping in an unbeaten 34 for company. We did have our moments, mind — Ramon Davidson back in the hutch for a duck was a small mercy, and Joshua Knowler bowled beautifully for 2-17, backed up nicely by Fred Taylor's 1-23 and Harrison Fermor's 1-25 to keep the total within reach rather than out of sight.

Chasing 135 is never the gentle stroll it sounds like on paper, but Toby Hughes made it look almost leisurely, top-scoring with a classy 47, while Harrison Fermor's unbeaten 22 saw us home with something to spare and overs in the bank — 135/3 off 16.3, job done. Hughes now sits proudly atop the 2023 T20 run charts with 161 to his name, and Fred Taylor isn't far behind the pack with 5 wickets on the season.

A seven-wicket win, then, earned the old-fashioned way — bowl tight, chase calmly, don't panic when asked to do the harder job first. Onwards indeed.

Sun 10 Sep 2023 🧢 Friendly XIv The Mote CC · HomeformWWLLL

I chipped in with 18 with the bat that Sunday and one wicket with the ball, but the real story of a scorching, cloudy afternoon against The Mote CC was written by others. Having won the toss and put them in, we restricted the visitors to 186/8 from their forty overs, no small feat against a top order that included James Waterson's 41 and useful contributions from Rod Harcourt (31 not out) and William Bacon (30). Alex Holt was superb with the new ball, snaring 3-32, while Tim Thirkell strangled the middle overs with 2-10 and three miserly maidens, and Matt Bacon chipped in with 2-16. Poor Will Aldrich was sent back without troubling the scorers, which is never a fun way to spend an afternoon in the field.

Chasing 187, Aaron Hughes played the innings of the day, an unbeaten 74 that carried us home, with Jordan Austin's 47 doing sterling work alongside him. Nick Tromp will not thank me for mentioning his golden duck, but the Duck Club ledger waits for no man. Thirty-four extras rounded out a target reached with 5 wickets and thirteen balls in hand, and I'm reliably informed my solitary wicket nudged me up to ninth on the club's all-time list, which I shall be insufferable about for at least a week.

A tight, honest contest in the heat, and we got over the line. A good day for the club.

Sat 09 Sep 2023 🧢 Friendly XIv Staplehurst CC · AwayformLWWLL

Beaten and bruised, we rolled up to Staplehurst CC on a proper scorcher, the sort of afternoon that makes you forget how quickly this game can turn on you. Winning the toss and putting them in felt like the right call at the time, and for a while it was: James Rodway carved out a classy 80, with Tom Davey unbeaten on 57 and Christopher Watts steady on 22 not out, while at the other end Russell Gormley went for a golden duck to our bowling. Martin Harris was magnificent, ripping through with 3-23 — a spell that, milestone fans will note, nudges him past Tim Thirkell and up to 9th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list — with Thirkell himself (2-31) and Josh Gurney (1-16) chipping in nicely. Even so, a brutal 17 runs off the 40th over left their total at 229/6, a total that always felt a stretch too far.

And so it proved. I contributed what I could with the bat, but our reply never quite found its rhythm, subsiding to 149 all out in 28.4 overs. Luke Welsman's 25 was the innings' backbone, with Benjamin Austin (23) and Richard Piper (20) offering good support, but wickets fell at the wrong end of too many overs and the required rate simply got away from us.

Welsman now leads our Friendly XI run charts this season with 66, and Harris tops the wickets with 3 — small consolations on a day the scoreboard told the real story. Beaten, fair and square. We dust ourselves down and go again.

Sat 09 Sep 2023 🧢 2nd XIv West Farleigh CC · AwayformDWDDD

I never let myself down more comprehensively than I did against West Farleigh, but let's start with the good news. It was a scorcher of an afternoon, and once Altus Diener got going for 83, Brandon Eloff followed him past the fifty with a well-struck 80 not out, and Laurie Probert chimed in with 71, we found ourselves purring along nicely. Add a handsome 46 in extras — someone at West Farleigh clearly wasn't feeling their radar — and 296/9 from our 40 overs looked, on paper, like a total to defend comfortably in the sunshine. Poor Nick Tromp and James Gray will want their names kept out of the club gazette after ducks apiece, though I'm told the walk of shame builds character.

Alas, defending it proved rather beyond us. West Farleigh simply refused to read the script, with David Wilkinson batting beautifully for 86, Alex Beechey chipping in with 59, and Shauk Shahebaz adding 33 as they eased to 299/8 and snuck home with the last ball practically still spinning. Diener was excellent again, this time with the ball, taking 2-26, Tromp made amends for his golden duck with 2-34, and I managed to grab a couple myself, finishing with 2-38 for my troubles.

So: beaten by three, on a day when 296 simply wasn't enough. Tromp remains a model of consistency, sitting second in the Second XI wicket charts with 25 for the season, and that, if nothing else, is worth clinging to on the drive home. We go again.

Wed 06 Sep 2023 🧢 Midweek XIv Gravesend CC · HomeformWLWLW

What a way to bring the curtain down on a scorching Wednesday afternoon — Gravesend CC came calling, and by the time we'd finished with them they'll have wished they'd stayed at home.

Batting first in the sunshine, we set about building something substantial, and substantial is exactly what we got: 288 for 7 from our 40 overs. Nick Tromp was the architect-in-chief, farming the strike to a magnificent unbeaten 103, and he didn't do it alone — Luke Welsman played a fine hand of 61, and Matthew Carter chipped in an unbeaten 27 to see us home to a total that had Gravesend's fielders wilting faster than the rest of us in the heat.

With that kind of cushion, the bowling attack could simply go hunting, and hunt they did. Gravesend's reply folded to 76 for 9 in just 23.1 overs, Patrick Barron's battling 21 the only real resistance, while Pavish Bhoomla and Jazz Saini were both sent back without troubling the scorers. Matthew Carter was the chief destroyer with 3 for 24, Tim Thirkell backed him up with 2 for 7 — three of those overs maidens, not a run given away lightly — and Luke Welsman took 2 for 9. I managed to get in on the act myself with a wicket, which rather pleasingly nudged me past Tim Thirkell into 9th on the club's all-time list.

A win as comprehensive as the sunshine was relentless. Onwards we go.

Sun 03 Sep 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Kent Royals (Hollingbourne) CC · AwayformLLWWW

We travelled down to Kent Royals (Hollingbourne) on Sunday, and winning the toss I did what any captain does on a fine September morning — had a look at the sky, consulted absolutely nobody, and put us in to bat. It proved a fair shout, at least at first: Anthony Karassellos, marking his 100th appearance in Linton colours with rather better timing than sentiment usually allows, cracked a fine 61, with Richard Piper — who continues to lead our 2023 Sunday 2nd XI run charts, currently on 456 for the season — chipping in a tidy 48. We closed on 157/7 from our 40 overs, a total that felt defendable in the changing room, if perhaps not quite substantial enough in the cold light of a Kent outfield.

And so it proved. Habahd Ali played the innings of the day, an unbeaten 84 that simply refused to be argued with, backed up by Moshi Chowdhury's composed 32 not out and Toffail Ahmed's breezy 20 — the shot of the afternoon undoubtedly his, a six clubbed square on the leg side that had several of us checking the boundary rope was still where we'd left it. Truth be told, our lengths were the story: we dropped just a fraction short all day, and they cut and pulled us to all corners. Karassellos (1-24) and Alex Wade (1-33) kept things honest, but 158/2 in 26.3 overs told its own tale.

Beaten by eight wickets. A landmark day for Anthony, a chastening one for the bowling unit — we'll sharpen those lengths and come again next week.

Sun 03 Sep 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Stone-in-Oxney CC · HomeformWWLWW

Sunday 03 September, and Stone-in-Oxney came calling on an afternoon that couldn't decide whether it was summer or not — scorching one minute, grey the next, a bit like my form with the bat this season. I won the toss and stuck us in, which felt like the right call at the time and, for once, I'm sticking to that story.

We piled up 199/7 from our forty overs, built on a rollicking opening stand of 80 before anyone so much as looked at a bowler funny. Jordan Austin's 48 was the innings' backbone, with Aaron Hughes and Thomas Roxburgh both chipping in 45 apiece to keep the board ticking. Not everyone's day, mind — Nick Tromp and Benjamin Austin both walked back without troubling the scorer, ducks obediently swimming alongside them.

Defending 199 always feels like walking a tightrope, and so it proved. Patrick Watsham made an infuriatingly good 77 not out, with Owen Piper's fifty and Toby Withers Green's 34 doing the damage either side of him. We had them 8-1 at one stage and thought we were in business, but a stand of 111 for the fourth wicket rather put paid to that plan. Tobey Castle bowled beautifully for 1-10, with Roxburgh and Ian Hollingworth chipping in too.

One proper highlight amid the gloom — Aaron Hughes brought up his 200th appearance in Linton colours, a landmark worth more than any scoreline. Beaten by five wickets in the end, but we'll be better for it next week.

Sat 02 Sep 2023 🧢 3rd XIv BC Brasted Chart and Toys Hill CC · AwayformLWDTL

I sent us out to Brasted Chart and Toys Hill on a warm, cloudy afternoon full of promise, lost the toss, and watched our opponents send us in — which, in hindsight, they'll have been quite pleased about. We limped to 85 all out in 35.3 overs, a total that flattered nobody. Ethan Joubert's 20 was the only innings of any real substance, a lone candle in the gloom, while Johan and Brandon Eloff both walked back for ducks, proving that misfortune, like good port, sometimes runs in the family.

Needing early wickets to make a match of it, I can't complain about the effort in the field. Henry Campbell was magnificent, ripping through the top order for 4-18, with James Gray and Tom Campbell chipping in a wicket apiece to keep the pressure on. Christian Payne, Pete Smith and Nick Price all departed for nought, and for a spell it looked like we might defend the indefensible. I did my bit with the bat earlier in the season and sit fifth in the 3rd XI run charts, which is either a source of quiet pride or a damning indictment of the top order — I'll let you decide.

In the end William McMenamin's unbeaten 32 saw Brasted Chart home by three wickets from 21.1 overs, our 85 simply not enough to trouble a side with one man in form. Not our day, then — heads up, and back to the nets.

Sat 02 Sep 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Holcombe & Blue Bell Hill CC · HomeformDDWDD

Saturday saw us host Holcombe & Blue Bell Hill CC on a warm, cloudy afternoon that promised more than it delivered — for us, at least, once I lost the toss and we were put in to bat. We were all out for 156 from 38 overs, rescued from something scrappier by Nick Tromp's fine 36, with Luke Welsman (24 not out) and Matthew Carter (23) offering steady support. Less gloriously, the Duck Club welcomed three new members to its ledger this week, Nolan Wilde, Aaron Hughes and Laurie Probert all completing the walk of shame for ducks.

Defending 156 was always going to ask a lot of the lads, and for a spell we had them exactly where we wanted them. Benjamin Austin led the attack superbly with 2-19, with Matthew Carter (1-10) and Anthony Karassellos (1-24) both among the wickets, and I added a modest 18 of my own earlier in the day to help get us to a defendable total. But Amal Anilkumar had other ideas, crafting a fine half-century of 68 with good support from Daniel Bennett's 46, and Holcombe eased home on 160/5 with three overs still in hand.

Beaten by five wickets, then, though I take some quiet comfort in leading the 2nd XI's run charts for the season with 413, while Matthew Carter's 11 wickets keep him nicely placed in fourth. Beaten, not disgraced — we'll dust ourselves down and come back stronger next week.

Sat 02 Sep 2023 🧢 1st XIv Addington Village CC · AwayformDDDDD

I trudged to Addington Village CC under low grey skies, and I'll admit I fancied our chances the moment I put us into the field. It proved the right call. Joshua Knowler ran through their order with 3-19, Toby Hughes and Martin Harris chipped in with 2-17 and 2-21 respectively, and Mark Christmas bowled with the sort of miserliness that leaves batsmen muttering into their gloves, three maidens and barely a run given away. Addington were shot out for 108 from 39 overs, and we walked off feeling rather pleased with ourselves.

Chasing it should have been the formality, and for a while it very nearly was. Harrison Fermor played a proper captain's innings — sorry, that's my line to steal, not his — a fluent 68 that dragged us to 114/4 in just 18.3 overs, with Toby Hughes unbeaten on 20 in support. As for my own contribution, I contrived a golden duck, and the less written about that the better; I shall simply note it happened and move swiftly on.

One bright footnote amid the numbers: Martin Harris's two wickets nudged him past Tim Thirkell into 9th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list, a fine achievement he'll no doubt mention at the bar. Henry Bourdillon continues to lead our run charts this summer with 428, and Mark Christmas tops the wickets with 25.

In the end neither side could force the win, and honours were shared. A draw, then — not the tidy victory the bowling deserved, but on a day like this, a fair result and no complaints from me.

Mon 28 Aug 2023 🧢 Twenty20v Town Malling CC · AwayformLWWLW

Skipper's Log — Monday 28 August 2023. Away to Town Malling, and for once the coin toss did us a favour by going the other way entirely, since they inserted us and I'd have batted first myself. Under cloudy skies we set about building something substantial, and the top of the order simply didn't want to give it back — 79 for the first wicket before anyone troubled the scorers with a dismissal. Henry Bourdillon and Anthony Karassellos both raced to unbeaten half-centuries, 51 and 50 respectively, with Thomas Beeney chipping in an equally handsome 43 not out. Poor Nick Tromp will want this one struck from the record, ducking out for nought, but 199 for 5 from our twenty overs was a score to be thoroughly pleased with.

Defending it, we were ruthless. Town Malling lost wickets in clusters — 13 for 1 became 20 for 4 before they'd had time to settle — and though Cian Horgan's 33 anchored a defiant 57-run stand for the fifth wicket, the writing was on the pavilion wall. Nick Tromp made amends for his golden duck with bat by taking 3 for 4 with the ball, Benjamin Austin backed him up nicely with 2 for 3, and I was pleased enough with my own 2 for 15. Three of theirs departed without scoring, and Anthony Karassellos bowled two miserly maidens for good measure. My only quibble was behind the stumps, where 17 byes went astray on a tricky afternoon with the gloves.

Town Malling limped to 111 for 9. An 88-run win, then, and a thoroughly satisfying one — onwards we go.

Sun 27 Aug 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv WC Wye CC · AwayformLLLWW

From the captain's chair — Sunday 27 August 2023. The road took us to Wye CC, sun on our backs and, having lost the toss, a chase already pencilled in before a ball was bowled.

Sent into the field, we made an early breakthrough with just 6 on the board, which was promising right up until Harry Ledger and Ru Roberts stitched together a stand of 54 for the fourth wicket and reminded us why nothing in this game is ever straightforward. Ledger went on to a fine 61, and Wye were eventually all out for 167 in the 34th over. Alexander Nunn was the pick of the attack with 3-33, Nick Pennefather chipped in with 3-37, and Neill Pennefather took 2-12 — between them doing rather more than their fair share, and Anna Makin's golden duck was a small mercy amid the toil.

A target of 168 is never a formality on a Wye afternoon, but our openers set about it in style, putting on 80 before the first wicket fell — the sort of start that lets a captain relax slightly too early. Richard Piper made sure the platform wasn't wasted, batting through to an unbeaten 70, with Frank Harbord's calm 20 not out seeing us home. I contributed 26 in the middle, more useful than pretty. Two of ours went the way of Anna Makin earlier, ducks apiece for Nick Pennefather and Alex Wade, but with 35 extras keeping the scoreboard ticking and Piper immovable, we got over the line by 5 wickets. A thoroughly good day for the club.

Sat 26 Aug 2023 🧢 2nd XIv HC Hunton Wanderers CC · AwayformDDDWD

Saturday last, we ventured to Hunton Wanderers CC, and if you're after a tale of glorious redemption on a sunlit green, I'm afraid you've picked the wrong report and possibly the wrong summer. Losing the toss, we were sent out to field first in what I can only describe as a "pleasant, thoroughly wet" afternoon — English weather doing its level best to keep both sides humble. Hunton ground out 227/9 from their 40, Mike Nock (59) and David East (58) putting bat firmly to ball with Mike Bassam (43) chipping in, while Evan Surrey at least gave us something to cheer with a duck. Anthony Karassellos was the pick of our attack, 3-23 with three miserly maidens thrown in, well backed by Darrell Houghton-Judge (3-36) and Alex Wade (1-36).

Chasing 228 was always going to want application, and we found rather less of it than the target demanded, bowled out for 131 in 28 overs. Jordan Austin (37) and Laurie Probert, unbeaten on 37, did the honours up top, and I managed 33 myself before joining the queue back to the pavilion. Three of our number — Junaid Mufti, Anthony Karassellos and Matthew Carter — took the walk of shame for nought, and fourteen byes suggested poor Aaron Hughes had a long, damp afternoon behind the stumps.

One shaft of real sunshine: Laurie Probert brought up his 200th appearance in Linton colours, a landmark that deserves far more fanfare than this soggy defeat allows. As for the rest of us — beaten by 96 runs, heads up, and back to the nets.

Sat 26 Aug 2023 🧢 1st XIv Mersham Sports CC · HomeformDDDDD

Saturday 26 August 2023, and Mersham Sports CC rolled up on an afternoon that could only be described as pleasantly soggy — the kind of day that makes winning the toss feel like a genuine achievement rather than pure luck. Which, for once, it was. I called correctly and, with the traditional optimism of a captain who hasn't checked the forecast, stuck us in.

We were bowled out for 149 in 38.3 overs, which on reflection was a touch light. William Roxburgh top-scored with a tidy 41, Luke Welsman chipping in a useful 33 alongside him. Elsewhere the card made for grimmer reading, with both Thomas Roxburgh and Martin Harris departing for ducks — the sort of collective batting slump that has grown men reaching for the biscuit tin in the tea interval.

Defending 149 was always going to require something special, and for a while we had it. Joshua Knowler bowled beautifully for 2-25 with two maidens thrown in for good measure, Harrison Fermor chipped in with 2-27 and, in a lovely personal footnote, reached 50 career wickets along the way. Mark Christmas took 1-27. But Ashley Cook's 48, backed up by Jamie Mcvittie's 33 and James Rand's 28 — with a stubborn 74-run third-wicket stand doing the real damage — saw Mersham home at 150/5 in 35.3 overs.

Beaten by five wickets, then, but not disgraced. Fermor's milestone was the shaft of sunlight in an otherwise damp afternoon, and we'll take the lesson home with the tea urn. Back to the nets, lads.

Wed 23 Aug 2023 🧢 Midweek XIv Tunbridge Wells Wednesday CC · HomeformLWLWL

Tunbridge Wells Wednesday came to Linton Park on a warm, overcast afternoon last Wednesday, and true to form the coin let us down before a ball was bowled — they had first use of the square and chose to bat. No matter; the lads were in fine fettle in the field. The visitors were shepherded to 100 all out in 42.4 overs, N. Badman's 32 the only real resistance, while U. Ramzam and H. Howard both walked back without troubling the scorers. Laurie Probert was the pick of the attack with 2-13, well supported by Nolan Wilde (2-16) and Tobey Castle (1-5), and Thomas Beeney — now our leading wicket-taker this season with 9 — bowled four maidens of the sort that make opposition batsmen contemplate their life choices.

Chasing 101, we made light work of it, cantering home at 103/3 in just 10.4 overs. Jordan Austin, who continues to bat like a man with somewhere else to be, struck a superb 72 and anchored a third-wicket stand of 56 — his season's tally now standing at a handsome 302 runs. Spare a thought, though, for John Karassellos, inducted into the Duck Club ledger with a golden duck for his trouble.

A thoroughly good day for the club: bowled tight, chased tighter, and were back in the pavilion for tea with time to spare. Six wickets to the good and not much to grumble about — this is village cricket as it ought to be played.

Tue 22 Aug 2023 🧢 Twenty20v Kings Hill CC · AwayformWLWWL

Tuesday found us on the road at Kings Hill, the sky doing its best warm, overcast village-cricket impression, and we had first use of the ball. It felt a fair start until Jack Doyle got going, cruising to 61, ably backed by Jake Rose's classy 52, and between them they threatened to bat us clean out of the contest. Kings Hill settled in the end for 151 for 5 from their twenty overs, and credit to the attack for keeping a lid on it — Thomas Beeney led the way with 1 for 27, I chipped in with 1 for 30, and Nick Tromp took 1 for 31, with Shehryar Gul sent back for a duck along the way.

Chasing 152 was never going to be a gentle stroll, and so it proved. Abishek Pushpavinothan set the tone with a composed 48, Luke Welsman weighed in with 29 and Aaron Hughes with 21, and between them they dragged us over the line at 152 for 7 from 18.5 overs, the job done with just over an over unused — the sort of finish that has spectators reaching for their tea rather too quickly.

Elsewhere in the season, Jordan Austin continues to bat beautifully and now sits second in the run charts on 107, while Nick Tromp's efforts nudge him to third in the wicket standings on four for the summer. A tight, nervy, thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work — a win to savour, and one we happily carried home with us.

Sun 20 Aug 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Egerton CC, Kent · HomeformWLLLW

Sunday 20 August 2023, and Egerton CC of Kent rolled up on a warm, damp afternoon that suited nobody's cricket whites. I lost the toss — no great surprise there, my coin-calling remains a season-long horror show — and we were sent into the field, which at least gave the lads something to do besides admire the covers.

Egerton ground their way to 184/7 from their forty overs, built around a well-made fifty from Toby Harper (69) and solid support from John Harrison (56) and Nick Waterhouse (30). Daniel Brenchley didn't trouble the scorers, departing for a golden duck. I had a rare purple patch with the ball, taking 3-36, with Zach Wilde (1-19) and Alex Holt (1-22) chipping in nicely, while Edward Seymour bowled with the meanness of a man guarding his allotment — three maidens' worth.

Chasing 185, Richard Piper played the innings of the day, an unbeaten 77 that did the heavy lifting, backed up by a watchful 40 not out from me and 38 from Glen Rawson. Poor Freddie Seymour fell without scoring — two ducks on the card by close, which felt almost thematic — though twenty-seven generous extras from Egerton kept the required rate friendly. We reached 187/3 with five overs unused, home by seven wickets.

A thoroughly satisfying afternoon all round — runs when we needed them, wickets when it mattered, and tea, as ever, the real man of the match.

Sun 20 Aug 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Egerton CC, Kent · AwayformWWWLW

Sunday, 20th August, and the fixtures gods sent us out to Egerton on an afternoon that couldn't decide whether it was summer or a car wash. I lost the toss — my coin-flipping form remains as reliable as my knees — and we were asked to field first, though as it turned out we needn't have worried, because it was the bat that did the talking for us.

231 all out from our forty overs, built on a magnificent 65 from Thomas Roxburgh and a fine fifty from Benjamin Austin, the pair putting on 134 for the third wicket while the rest of us admired the view. I chipped in with 39 down the order, which I'll take. Then, as is traditional at Linton Park, we contrived a proper collapse from 195-3 to 201-6 in the time it takes to pour a tea, with poor Ian Hollingworth bagging a duck for his troubles — though he'd more than make amends later.

Egerton's reply never got out of first gear. Seb Harrison's 35 was the one bright spark in a total of 84, and after a promising opening stand of 52 the innings simply disintegrated - 63-2 became 74-5 with Paul Hope, Josh Underdown and Neil Crossley-Roberts all failing to trouble the scorers. Luke Welsman was magnificent, 6-12 with three maidens thrown in for good measure, and Hollingworth atoned for his golden duck with 4-14 of his own.

A 147-run win, two points banked, and a rare afternoon where absolutely everything went right. I'll take the tea and biscuits over the toss any day.

Sat 19 Aug 2023 🧢 3rd XIv Teston CC · AwayformWLWDT

A grey, warm afternoon at Teston seemed made for cricket, and for a while it looked as though we'd made the right call putting ourselves in the field first. Alastair Allsworth had other ideas, ploughing through past his fifty to finish unbeaten on 56 as Teston were eventually bowled out for 145 in 38.1 overs — a total that owed everything to him and precious little to his colleague Toby Allsworth, sent back for a duck. James Gray was magnificent with the ball, prising out three for 14 including two miserly maidens, with Frank Harbord (2-23) and Brandon Eloff (1-1) chipping in nicely to keep the total within reach.

Reach it we did not. Our reply folded for 80 in 31.3 overs, the kind of batting effort that has committee members reaching for the tea urn a little earlier than planned. Connor Wakley's golden duck rather summed up the afternoon, and I did what I could with bat in hand, though clearly not enough to turn the tide. Elsewhere in the season's ledger there was cheerier reading — Nick Pennefather sits third in the 3rd XI run charts with 90 to his name, and James Gray now second in the wicket standings with six.

A defeat, then, and not a flattering one with the bat. But Gray's bowling gives us something to build on, and there are worse things in this life than a warm afternoon at Teston, even a losing one.

Sat 19 Aug 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Sherwood CC, Kent · AwayformDDDDW

Saturday 19 August, and the road took us to Sherwood CC, Kent, for what turned out to be a proper old-fashioned draw. Warm, overcast, the kind of afternoon that asks nothing of the sun and gets nothing from it. We had first use of the ball, and I can't complain about the day's work with it — Nolan Wilde in particularly ferocious form, ripping through Sherwood with 5-24, well backed up by Nick Tromp's tidy 3-13 and a wicket for Junaid Mufti. We had them 116 all out from 38 overs despite a spirited stand between Lewis Slaughter (35) and James Courtney (33), and among the wickets we took was a golden duck for Mark Norris, alongside James Kerr.

Set 117 to win, we set about the chase with more good sense than fireworks. Laurie Probert anchored things nicely with 32, and I chipped in with a few runs myself along the way — a contribution I'm rather pleased to fold quietly into the scorebook rather than shout about twice. Richard Piper (26) and Aaron Hughes (21) kept the innings ticking, and we closed on 118/4 from 28.3 overs, safely there but with no great hurry about it.

The real story of the day, though, belonged to Laurie Probert, who brought up his 200th appearance in Linton colours — a landmark achieved, fittingly, while steering us home. Honours shared, then, but with a duck taken and a milestone reached, this felt less like a stalemate and more like a day well spent.

Sat 19 Aug 2023 🧢 1st XIv Rodmersham CC · HomeformDDDDD

Rodmersham CC came to Linton Park on a warm, overcast Saturday, and by the close honours were shared — though not before the day had a good deal to say for itself. Put into the field, we watched Craig England compile a fine 51, well supported by Kevin Jones (27) and Lewis Baldock (20), as the visitors built steadily to 148/8 from their 45 overs. Mark Christmas was magnificent with the ball, 4-27 including three tight maidens, and he was well backed up by Mardey Castle (2-36) and Martin Harris (1-21). Max Lateu departed for a duck to our attack — small mercies, gratefully accepted.

In reply, Toby Hughes played the innings of the day, an unbeaten 69 that carried us home in style, with Benjamin Austin (41) and Thomas Roxburgh (20 not out) offering fine support as we cruised to 152/3 in just 24.5 overs. As for the captain's own contribution — I shall draw a discreet veil over it, save to say it was a golden blank, the sort of innings best summarised in a single duck emoji and forgotten by close of play. A captain is meant to lead by example; on this occasion I led only by demonstrating how not to do it.

There was a genuine highlight to toast, however: Mardey Castle brought up his 100th career wicket, a landmark worthy of the mantelpiece. All told, a draw when neither side could force the win — honest cricket, honours shared, and a very good tea, I should think.

Wed 16 Aug 2023 🧢 Midweek XIv The Mote CC · AwayformDLWLW

Skipper's Log — Wednesday 16 August 2023. We travelled down to The Mote CC on a warm, damp afternoon, lost the toss, and found ourselves in the field first — never quite the outcome I hope for when that coin goes up, but there it is.

Their innings ran to 212 for 9 off 40 overs, built almost entirely around Fergie Conway, who ground us down for an unbeaten 124. We had our moments, mind — Abraham Thomas nicked off for a duck, and I managed to prise out two for 23 myself, with Nick Tromp the pick of the attack at 2 for 14 and Nolan Wilde chipping in with 1 for 20.

Chasing 213, we never quite got going. Benjamin Austin's 44 and Thomas Roxburgh's 40 gave us hope, and their 51-run stand for the third wicket was the spine of the innings, but once it slipped from 151 for 7 to 151 all out, it did so in an almighty hurry. Nick Tromp, Varunkrishna Karthik and Alex Keeler all trudged back for nought, and I can hardly point the finger — my own contribution was a golden blob, out first ball, which is not quite the example a captain likes to set.

Elsewhere in the club, Aaron Hughes continues to lead the Midweek XI run charts on 235, with Thomas Beeney topping the wickets on 8.

Beaten by 61 runs in the end. We'll be better for it next week.

Mon 14 Aug 2023 🧢 Midweek XIv LC Linton Village CC · HomeformWDLWL

Skipper's Log, Monday 14th August — Linton Village CC the visitors, and a warm, damp afternoon greeted us at the ground, the sort of day that gets into the pads and never quite leaves.

Winning the toss, I had no hesitation electing to bat first — for once a decision that didn't look foolish by close of play. Their innings ran to 190/4 off 40 overs, built largely on a fine 98 from Stanley Leech, with George Leech unbeaten on 53 giving him able support. Our bowling had its moments of real quality amid the graft: John Karassellos was superb, snaring 2-7, with Alex Keeler (1-9) chipping in nicely. I managed 1-31 myself, more workmanlike than wonderful, but every wicket counts when you're chasing a total like that.

Chasing 191, we made light work of it in the end, reaching the target for the loss of just three wickets with nearly six overs unused — 191/3 in 34.1 overs. Benjamin Austin was the class act, cruising past his fifty to finish unbeaten on 56, well supported by Aaron Hughes (52) and Jordan Austin, calmly seeing us home unbeaten on 29. Aaron continues to top the season's run charts on 223, while John sits second in the wickets table on 7 — form that bodes well for the rest of the campaign.

Seven wickets to the good, then, and a thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work. A good day for the club, and one the tea urn will be talking about for weeks.

Sun 13 Aug 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv FC Farningham CC · AwayformWWWWL

Here is the match report:

Sunday saw the Linton Park charabanc trundle down to Farningham on a warm, damp afternoon perfect for a spot of village cricket — and having won the toss, I did what any self-respecting captain does with a heavy sky overhead: stuck them in.

For a while it looked a shrewd move, and then, as ever, Farningham's middle order had other ideas. Richard Pleydell top-scored with a fine 47, and with Freddie Martin (32) and John Spice (29) offering sturdy support, a 76-run stand for the sixth wicket threatened to bat us out of the game. But cricket has a wonderful habit of turning on its head, and the floodgates duly opened — 164 for six became 175 for nine in the blink of an eye, James Weaver departing without so much as a sniff of the scoreboard. Joshua Knowler was the pick of our attack with a superb 3 for 12, well backed by Ian Hollingworth (2-30) and Thomas Beeney (2-31), and Farningham were all out for 175.

With the bat, Jordan Austin played the innings of the day, a majestic unbeaten century that made the chase look tidier than it perhaps was. I chipped in with 25 and shared a useful 59-run stand for the third wicket, while Benjamin Austin's brisk 24 kept things ticking — though his gloves were rather busier than his bat, 16 byes betraying a tricky pitch behind the stumps.

We got home by six wickets. Two points, thoroughly earned, and a very pleasant drive home.

Sun 13 Aug 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv East Sutton CC · AwayformLWLLL

Batting for Linton Park at East Sutton on a warm, damp Sunday, I lost the toss – no great surprise, my coin-calling has never troubled the actuaries – and duly found ourselves inserted. We limped to 172 all out in 38.5 overs, a total that flattered to deceive on the scorecard: I made 51, with Edward Seymour (25) and Alex Wade (22) chipping in nicely, and a stand of 63 for the seventh wicket did the honest, unglamorous work of an innings. Elsewhere it was carnage – 11 for 1 became 15 for 4 before you could say "cucumber sandwich," with Nick Pennefather, Frank Harbord and Zach Wilde all back in the pavilion without troubling the scorers. Forty-one extras kept the total respectable, which tells its own story.

Defending 172 always feels like bringing a butter knife to a gunfight, but East Sutton made hard work of it, reaching 155 for 6 from their forty overs. Darren Thompson's unbeaten 48, backed by Ben Tragett (37) and Martin Hoare (22), built through a stubborn 63-run fifth-wicket stand after an early wobble at 8 for 1. Alexander Nunn was magnificent, 3 for 27 with two maidens, and I was glad to lend a hand with 2 for 21, Tim Thirkell adding 1 for 22 for good measure. Colin Crampton departed for nought.

Seventeen runs the right side of the ledger, two points banked, and a thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work all round.

Sat 12 Aug 2023 🧢 2nd XIv BS Bexhill Strikers · HomeformDDDDD

Twelfth of August, and Bexhill Strikers came calling on a warm, overcast, blustery afternoon — the sort of day where you're never quite sure whether to bowl a full length or just hang on to your cap. I won the toss and had no hesitation in electing to bat, which for once turned out to be exactly the right call.

Benjamin Austin then played the innings of the summer, carrying his bat to a magnificent unbeaten century, with Anthony Karassellos giving him fine and watchful company on the way to 56 not out. Even our extras column pitched in with a handy 30, and we declared ourselves — informally, at tea, over the last of the flapjacks — very satisfied with 229/4 from our 35 overs.

Defending that kind of total is meant to be the easy part, and so it proved. Elwin Varghese and Shaji Thomas were sent back without troubling the scorers, ducks both, and from there the Strikers never got a foothold. Aravind's 23 was as good as it got for them. Nick Tromp was quite magnificent, ripping through with 3 for just 3, well backed up by Tim Thirkell (2-17) and Nolan Wilde (2-20), and the visitors were done for 89 in 23.4 overs. I chipped in with 15 of my own along the way, more spectator than protagonist in a bowling performance that did all the real work.

A win by 140 runs, then, and a thoroughly good afternoon's cricket. Onwards we go.

Sat 12 Aug 2023 🧢 3rd XIv Offham CC · HomeformWWLWD

Skipper's Log, Saturday 12th August 2023: Offham CC at home, and a warm, overcast sort of afternoon with the wind doing its level best to get involved. I called correctly at the toss – a rarer event than I'd like to admit – and had no hesitation in sticking us in the field.

Offham posted a healthy 214/5 from their forty, built on half-centuries from Felix Eyre (74 not out) and Charlie Razey (62), with Peter Mcgonigle chipping in 26. We did have our moments, mind – Neill Pennefather bowled beautifully for 2-37, Henry Campbell picked up 2-48, and Nick Pennefather was as tight as a Sunday collection plate, 1-28 with two maidens thrown in. Marcus Faithfull, at least, departed for a golden duck at our hands, which felt like a small personal victory.

Chasing 215, we matched them stroke for stroke, closing on 214/5 ourselves. Laurie Probert produced an innings for the ages – 100 not out, immaculate – ably supported by Nick Pennefather's 61. Trevor Back's duck was the one blot on an otherwise fine effort, and twenty-five extras did their bit, including eight byes that had poor Glen Rawson wincing behind the stumps all afternoon.

A tie. Two sides, two identical totals, not a blade of grass between us. You couldn't script it, and frankly I wouldn't want to – a result that did both teams proud, and Laurie's ton to remember it by.

Sat 12 Aug 2023 🧢 1st XIv Chestfield CC · AwayformTDDDD

From the captain's chair, Saturday 12 August 2023: we made the trip to Chestfield CC under skies that couldn't decide whether to sulk or blow a gale, and for once the toss fell my way. I had no hesitation in batting first, and for once I shall allow myself the satisfaction of saying it was the right call. Henry Bourdillon and Harrison Fermor set about proving me correct, sharing a magnificent 107 for the first wicket before either fell, Henry going on to 74 and Harrison to 71 — both handsomely past their fifties. George Taylor chipped in with 24, the extras column did its bit with 27, and my own contribution of 16 will not trouble the record books, but 265/8 from our 45 overs felt like a total with substance.

Substance it proved to be. Chestfield fought hard through Neil Gowers, whose imperious 114 was the innings of the day, well supported by Paul Gibson's 41 and Daniel Patching's 28, and a fifth-wicket stand of 114 threatened to undo us. But Mark Christmas had other ideas, spinning through them for a magical 5-28, with Martin Harris (2-57) and Alex Keeler (1-32) chipping in and Toby Hughes tying things down with two maidens. Luke Whale departed for a duck.

A fine win by 31 runs, and a landmark for Mark besides, climbing the club's all-time wicket-taking list. Onwards, in good heart.

Fri 11 Aug 2023 🧢 Midweek XIv The Dragons CC · HomeformDWDLW

Skipper's Log — Friday 11th August 2023. Home to The Dragons.

There's a particular flavour of English optimism that survives every shower and every scoreboard, and I had it in spades as we won the toss on a warm, blustery afternoon and asked The Dragons to bat first — a decision that looked shrewd for about four overs. Then Jack Killen decided he fancied a century, and duly helped himself to an unbeaten 101, ably supported by Josh Mihill's 41 and Ross Davies' 30, as they racked up 226/4 from their thirty overs. Nolan Wilde toiled manfully at the other end for 2-36, Luke Welsman chipped in with 1-27, and I managed to prise out one for 46 of my own — evidence, if nothing else, that I was at least present.

Chasing 227 is the sort of task that separates the brave from the sensible, and we were somewhere in between. Benjamin Austin battled to an unbeaten 36, with Aaron Hughes (25) and Will Thew (23) offering support, but 129/5 from our thirty overs was never going to trouble the Dragons' total. Spare a thought for poor Louis Turney, whose golden duck will now live in club infamy — the walk of shame indeed, and the ducks were quacking.

We go down by 97 runs, thoroughly outgunned by a special innings. Jordan Austin continues to lead the season's run charts, Wilde sits third among the wicket-takers, and the rest of us head back to the nets with our tails between our legs. Not our day, but there's always Friday next.

Wed 09 Aug 2023 🧢 Twenty20v MC Minster (Sheppey) CC · AwayformWWLWW

Right, we lost the toss for words but here's the report — I've got Toby Hughes and me correctly on our side, Jordan Connor and Bobby Cunningham on Minster's.

There's a road trip that separates the men from the boys, and the ferry to Sheppey on a warm, overcast Wednesday certainly qualified. We won the toss, or perhaps we didn't — either way, we found ourselves batting first, and Toby Hughes set about reminding everyone why he's topping our run charts this summer, cracking a fine 46. I chipped in with 39 of my own down the order, Henry Bourdillon chipped in a tidy 27, and between us we hauled our way to 145/6 from fifteen overs — respectable, if not quite a match-winning total. Spare a thought for poor Aaron Hughes, though, who departed for a duck; these things happen to the best of us, usually when we can least afford it.

Defending it, we started brightly enough — Alex Keeler and Toby Hughes both struck with the ball, 1-24 and 1-31 respectively, and for a while it looked like a contest. Then Jordan Connor and Bobby Cunningham decided otherwise. Connor finished unbeaten on a classy 57, Cunningham cracked a well-made 54, and between them they simply took the game away from us — the tenth over alone cost us 26 runs, which is the sort of over that gives a captain grey hairs he didn't previously own. Minster cantered home at 149/2 with overs to spare.

A chastening afternoon, then, and a defeat we'll take home and learn from — though the ferry back always tastes better with a pint in hand, win or lose.

Sun 06 Aug 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv BC Bobbing Court and Lower Halstow CC · AwayformLLWLL

Skipper's Log — Bobbing Court and Lower Halstow CC, away, Sunday 6 August 2023

Well, we lost the toss on a pleasant, damp afternoon, and Bobbing Court took first knock without so much as a by-your-leave. What followed was a masterclass we could only admire from a distance: Jamie Stevens compiled a magnificent 115, with Mark Stevens chipping in a tidy 57 of his own, as they racked up 241/6 from their forty overs. To our credit, we clawed back some pride with the ball — John Karassellos was superb, snaring 3-17, well backed up by Sam King's 2-60, and poor Dominic Reid was sent packing without troubling the scorers. Small mercies.

Chasing 242 was always going to be a stiff ask, and so it proved. Glen Rawson held things together with a battling 31, ably assisted by Junaid Mufti's 24, while young Zach Wilde endured a golden duck he'll want to forget in a hurry. I contributed 18 myself, though modesty forbids further comment. We limped to 132/9 from our forty overs, not helped by a generous 15 wides and 18 no-balls gifted to the opposition — discipline, frankly, went walkabout.

Beaten by 109 runs in the end, no arguing with that scoreline. Still, Glen Rawson continues to top the Sunday 2nd XI run charts with 278 for the season, and John Karassellos sits a creditable fifth in the wicket-takers with six. We'll dust ourselves down, have a stern word about the extras, and come back stronger next week.

Sun 06 Aug 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Chestfield CC · HomeformWWWWW

Beaten by 21 runs in the end, but there was much to admire in a damp, muggy afternoon at Linton Park. We lost the toss, Chestfield chose to bat, and off we trotted with the new ball. Thomas Beeney was in fine, miserly form, snaring 3-22, with Ian Hollingworth chipping in 3-47 and I managed 2-19 myself to keep things respectable. Ben Burgess top-scored for the visitors with 48, ably supported by Sebastian Camp and Jacob Meredith, both 21, as Chestfield were eventually shepherded out for 160 from 38.3 overs — a target that felt gettable on a good day, and this, on paper at least, was one of those.

Our reply, alas, told a different story. Darrell Houghton-Judge battled well for 29, with Benjamin Austin (24) and Luke Welsman (20) offering support, but the top order rather fell over itself — 3 for 1 inside the first few overs set an uneasy tone. We limped to 129-7 before the tail collapsed in a rush, all out for 139 in 36 overs. William Roxburgh and Thomas Beeney both trudged back for ducks, joining that ever-swelling club none of us wish to captain. Benjamin Austin had a torrid time behind the stumps too, leaking 8 byes for good measure.

Small consolations: Austin remains our leading run-scorer this season with 326, and Beeney tops the wicket pile with 14. But 21 runs is 21 runs, and the tea urn tasted a little bitter this week. We'll regroup, dust off the pads, and be better for it next Sunday.

Thu 03 Aug 2023 🧢 Twenty20v Kings Hill CC · HomeformLWWLW

It was a warm, grey sort of Thursday, the kind that makes you wonder whether the covers are more use than the sun cream, but Kings Hill CC found us in fine fettle regardless. Batting first, we set about assembling 149 for 4 from our twenty overs, with William Roxburgh the architect-in-chief — a fine half-century of 60 — and Jordan Austin right alongside him with 58 of his own. Two half-centuries in one innings is the sort of luxury a captain rarely gets to enjoy without having to bowl at the end of it, and I certainly wasn't complaining.

With the ball, Kings Hill made a fair fist of the chase, reaching 115 for 6, propelled chiefly by Noah Hutchins' 44 and Nathan Faulkes' 24. But Thomas Roxburgh was in inspired form, plucking out 3 for 10 and, rather wonderfully, reaching his 50th career wicket along the way — a landmark worth raising a glass to. I chipped in with 1 for 8, Mardey Castle took 1 for 12, and between us we squeezed the life out of their middle order, with poor Atif Bhatti departing for a duck.

So, runs on the board, wickets in the bag, and Jordan Austin now sitting proudly atop the season's run charts. A thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work — we got over the line, and that, as ever, is all that really matters.

Sat 29 Jul 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Gravesend CC · HomeformDDDDD

Right, well, it's not often you get to captain and write the report, so bear with me on the ego trip.

We won the toss and had first use of the ball at home to Gravesend CC on a warm, overcast Saturday — the sort of afternoon that promises rain and then, with typical English mischief, delivers none. Gravesend crawled to 120/9 from their 40 overs, Aakash Bagga (29) and Varinder Bhagat (26) doing the heavy lifting while the rest came and went with more haste than judgement — Zeaul Karim among them, back in the hutch without troubling the scorers. Nolan Wilde was the chief tormentor, a fine 3-12 that had their middle order in all sorts of bother, with Nick Tromp (2-24) and Darrell Houghton-Judge (1-3) mopping up either end, and Matthew Carter bowling three tidy maidens to strangle the scoring.

A gettable total, we thought, and so it very nearly proved. Benjamin Austin top-scored with a composed 29, and I was glad to chip in with 23 of my own alongside him, but wickets fell at regular enough intervals that 121/8 from 33.4 overs was as far as we could stretch it — honours even, a draw when neither side had quite enough in the tank to force the issue.

Small print worth savouring: Matthew Carter's wicket nudged him past Mark Christmas into 11th on the club's all-time list, while I lead the 2nd XI run charts on 335 for the season and Nolan sits proudly atop the wickets with 20. A scrappy, honest draw — no losers today, just two sides who couldn't quite finish the job.

Sat 29 Jul 2023 🧢 1st XIv Offham CC · AwayformDTDDD

We set off for Offham on a Saturday that couldn't decide whether it was summer or a car wash, and having won the toss I sent them in, more in hope than genius. They ground out 171 all out in 39.2 overs, with Josiah Bongers doing most of the damage with a well-made 77. Our attack had its say too, though — Harry Legg was sent packing for a golden duck, and Martin Harris bowled beautifully for 2-20, backed up nicely by Harrison Fermor's 2-26 and Mark Christmas's 2-30. A proper team effort with the ball, and for once nobody had to apologise for their figures over tea.

Chasing 172, we made a fair fist of it without ever quite making it look easy, closing on 172/8 from 29.4 overs. George Taylor was the class of the innings with a fine 51, Mark Christmas finished unbeaten on 30, and Toby Hughes chipped in with 21. I managed a workmanlike 18 myself, which I shall claim credit for at least once. Thomas Roxburgh and Luke Welsman both contributed golden ducks, proof that even village cricket has a sense of humour.

Form-wise, I'm rather chuffed to be leading the 2023 first XI run charts with 357, while Christmas continues his quietly brilliant season, third in the wicket standings on 14.

In the end neither side could force it, and honours were shared. A draw feels like the right word for an afternoon that gave everyone a bit of glory and nobody a great deal of glory at all.

Thu 27 Jul 2023 🧢 Twenty20v Headcorn CC · AwayformWLWWL

I trudged out to Headcorn CC on a blustery, showery Thursday with rain in the air and, frankly, in my bones, and put us into the field first. Jordan Vine gave their innings its backbone with a well-made unbeaten fifty, but I was in the mood to make a nuisance of myself, finishing with 3-35, while Alex Wade (1-15) and Nick Tromp (1-18) chipped away at the other end. We restricted them to 133/6 from their 20 overs — respectable, but not out of reach on a good pitch, of which this occasionally resembled one.

Chasing it down, we made 134/7 from 19 overs in the sort of nerve-jangling, tea-spilling fashion that keeps club cricket honest. Henry Bourdillon led the way with a fine 45, Nick Tromp kept his head to finish 32 not out, and Laurie Probert weighed in with a handy 21. Between showers and the odd gust that threatened to take the bails off on its own, we got there with overs to spare on the clock but precious little to spare on the nerves.

A red-letter day all round: Nick Tromp reached fifty career wickets, a genuine mantelpiece moment, and now sits top of our 2023 T20 run charts with 98 to his name, while I find myself third in the wicket charts on 3. A good day for the club, a good day in the field and with the bat, and — showers notwithstanding — a thoroughly good day to be a Linton Park cricketer.

Wed 26 Jul 2023 🧢 Twenty20v MC Minster (Sheppey) CC · HomeformWWLWW

Wednesday last, and with rain clouds loitering menacingly over Linton Park like uninvited relatives, we welcomed Minster (Sheppey) CC for what promised to be a proper old-fashioned soaking of a T20. I won the toss and, in a rare moment of tactical clarity, put us in — a decision I stand by, whatever the scorebook says by the end of this report.

Batting first, we posted a tidy 100/3 from our ten overs. Toby Hughes led the charge with a chunky 32, and had fine company from Abishek Pushpavinothan (27) and George Taylor, who continues his imperious season with 24 more — the man is now sitting atop the club's 2023 run charts with 90, and frankly deserves a testimonial dinner, or at least a second helping of tea.

Defending 100 in ten overs is never a relaxed affair, and so it proved. Thomas Beeney bowled beautifully for 2-14, with Nick Tromp and Fred Taylor (the latter now our leading wicket-taker this year with four) chipping in either side of him. But Jordan Connor had other ideas, compiling an unbeaten 34 to drag Minster over the line at 101/7, sneaking home by three wickets.

So, beaten — but not disgraced, and certainly not dampened in spirit, unlike the outfield. We'll dust ourselves down, put the kettle on, and come back stronger next week.

Sun 23 Jul 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Sissinghurst CC · AwayformDWWWW

Skipper's Log — Sunday 23 July 2023

Sissinghurst CC on a warm, blustery afternoon, and it turned out to be one of those days when the tea urn could stay proud all evening. Batting first, we posted a handsome 257/9 off our forty overs, built around a really lovely knock of 88 from Benjamin Austin — the sort of innings that makes the rest of us look faintly ridiculous with a bat in hand — with fine support from Thomas Roxburgh (38) and William Roxburgh (38), the pair seemingly determined not to be outdone by each other. Not everyone had their name in lights, mind: Aaron Hughes, Thomas Beeney and Darrell Houghton-Judge all made the lonely walk back for nought, and I'm reliably informed the Duck Club ledger is looking rather full this season.

With the ball, we set about Sissinghurst with real purpose. Jack Dyas played beautifully for his 61, but he had precious little company — Henry Elliott, Mike Godfrey and Ben Clift all departed without troubling the scorers, and the rest of the order couldn't build anything lasting, folding for 139 in 36.3 overs. Darrell Houghton-Judge was outstanding, 3-22 with two tidy maidens thrown in, and William Roxburgh chipped in nicely with 2-13. I managed a wicket myself for 6 runs, which I shall take gladly and mention only the once.

A thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work, and a win to savour.

Sun 23 Jul 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Marden CC, Kent · AwayformDLLWL

I'll travel back down memory lane no further than Sunday just gone — no CLAUDE.md diagnostics required for this one, just a village square and a scoreboard that didn't quite behave.

Sunday 23 July found us on the road to Marden CC, Kent, under skies that couldn't decide whether they were grey or merely sulking, with a wind that fancied itself a twelfth man. Put in to bat, we never quite got going: 113 all out in 28.3 overs is the sort of total that has you studying your boots rather than the scorebook. Alex Wade top-scored with a tidy 31, and I chipped in with 26 to keep him company for a while, but beyond that the effort had a distinctly threadbare look to it. Special mention, if that's the word, to Jonathan Sisley, who contributed a golden duck to proceedings — the kind of innings best forgotten by tea, though of course we shall not let him forget it.

With the ball, we scrapped hard. Tim Thirkell was superb, miserly as ever with four maidens on his way to 2-18, and had the satisfaction of removing Jamie Puncher for nought. Alexander Nunn (2-27) and Sam King (1-23) chipped in nicely, but Jack Yallop's 49 gave Marden the platform they needed, and they got home on 114/6 from 29.4 overs.

For the record books, I sit third in our 2023 Sunday 2nd XI run charts with 177, while Tim continues to lead the wicket-takers with 13 — some consolation on a day when the runs simply wouldn't flow. A defeat, then, but an honest one, and there's plenty in the bowling to build on.

Sat 22 Jul 2023 🧢 3rd XIv Bearsted CC · AwayformWWLW

A drizzly Saturday at Bearsted, and honestly, I'll take a share of the spoils over a soaking any day of the week.

Batting first, we never quite got the wheels turning, limping to 47 for 4 from our sixteen overs — the sort of score that has you studying your shoelaces rather than the scoreboard. Henry Campbell will not thank me for mentioning it, but in the interests of accurate record-keeping the ledger must have its due: a golden duck, out without troubling the scorers, and the walk back to the pavilion that every one of us dreads. Chin up, Henry — we've all been there, and the club's duck-keepers wear the badge with more pride than shame these days.

Where we lacked with the bat, we made amends with the ball, sending Bearsted back for nought all out — a proper rearguard effort from the whole side, and I was glad to get among the wickets myself. On a pitch offering that little bit extra in the drizzle, it was the sort of bowling performance that reminds you why you turn up on a grey afternoon in the first place.

With honours shared, neither side could quite land the knockout blow, and a draw felt about right for a day when the weather had as much say as either XI. Elsewhere in the season's business, young Theo Clements continues his steady climb up the 3rd XI run charts, now sitting fifth with 36 to his name — one to watch. All told: a scrappy, soggy, thoroughly English stalemate, and we'll happily bank the point and dry out the whites for next week.

Sat 22 Jul 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Southfleet CC · AwayformDDDDD

A soggy Saturday down at Southfleet, and one that will live long in the memory for all the wrong reasons. Put simply, we couldn't buy a run. Nine overs yielded a modest 34/2, with poor Jordan Austin the first to fall, ducking out without troubling the scorers, and your captain following suit with a golden blob that will do nothing for the leadership credentials — lead by example, they say, though on this occasion the example was strictly in what not to do.

Still, cricket has a wonderful habit of evening things out, and so it proved with the ball in hand. Whatever confidence Southfleet had taken from our threadbare total evaporated as our bowlers went to work, sending the entire home side back to the pavilion for nothing at all. A collapse to remember, and one that turned a losing afternoon into a share of the spoils.

Elsewhere in the season's ledger, Aaron Hughes continues to ply his trade in fine style, sitting proudly fifth in the 2nd XI run charts with 181 to his name — a rock of consistency while the rest of us flapped about like ducks in the drizzle.

So, honours even in the end. Not the afternoon any of us dreamed of with the bat, least of all the skipper, but a draw salvaged from the jaws of something considerably worse. We'll take it, dust ourselves down, and go again.

Sat 22 Jul 2023 🧢 1st XIv AC Ash CC · HomeformDDTDD

A pleasant, showery Saturday saw Ash CC roll into Linton Park, and I can't say the weather did much to sharpen anyone's touch — least of all mine. We were put in, or perhaps just talked ourselves into batting, and 75 for 5 off 22 overs was scratchy stuff by anybody's reckoning. George Taylor held the innings together with a battling 21, while I contributed what the scorebook will forever record as a golden duck. Nought. Not a run to my name, and I shall not dwell on it further than to say the shower that followed felt entirely appropriate to my mood.

Still, a captain's job is to lead from the front even when the front has just walked back to the pavilion in disgrace, and we regrouped to defend our total with rather more conviction than we'd shown making it. Whatever secret Ash CC's top order were nursing, they never found the key — the whole side came and went without troubling the scorers, bowled out for nought all out. Credit to the lads for turning a modest total into an unplayable one.

So honours shared, a draw when neither side could quite land the killer blow — and frankly, after my own duck, I'll take it. Elsewhere in the season's ledger, Mark Christmas continues his quietly excellent campaign, sitting third in the 1st XI run charts with 217 to his name. A funny old game, cricket. We live to bat again.

Wed 19 Jul 2023 🧢 Midweek XIv LX Lord Cornwallis XI · HomeformLDWDL

Drizzle has never bothered Linton Park, and it certainly didn't bother us on the 19th, as Lord Cornwallis XI rolled up to find us in determinedly cheerful mood despite the damp. We put them in, and watched Nick Pennefather compile a classy 78 that did most of the damage, well supported by Sam Boyns's 33 and an unbeaten 31 from Alex Cornwallis, the innings closing on 198/8 from their 35 overs. Credit to the attack for keeping it that side of alarming — Thomas Beeney led from the front with 2-20, Sam Boyns doubled up with bat and ball to add 2-26, and Nolan Wilde chipped in with 1-29. I managed to pick up a wicket myself along the way, which I'm rather chuffed to report nudged me past Matthew Carter into 10th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list.

Chasing 199, we made hard work of the early overs before Jordan Austin played a lovely fifty, 65 in all, to give the innings its spine. Sam Boyns, clearly enjoying his afternoon, finished unbeaten on 40, and Darrell Houghton-Judge's 22 mattered more than the scorebook lets on. Poor Will Thew will want this one struck from the record, bagging a duck, but a crucial stand of 53 for the seventh wicket got us home with something to spare, 202/7 in 34.3 overs. Jordan Austin's runs also carried him past Paul Brattle into 24th on the all-time run charts.

Three wickets, two points, and a very contented drive home. Thoroughly earned, and thoroughly enjoyed.

Sun 16 Jul 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv SC Sevenoaks Vine CC · AwayformTDWWW

Sunday took us down to Sevenoaks Vine CC under skies that couldn't decide whether to shower on us or simply blow a gale through the outfield — pleasant enough between times, though. Winning the toss, I had no hesitation in asking them to bat first, and for a while it looked the shrewdest call I'd made all season: the opener departed with just 7 on the board. But Henry Smith settled in for a fine, well-made fifty of 52, with Henry Lewis chipping in 36, and an eighth-wicket stand worth 70 dragged them to 160 all out from 37.5 overs. Small mercies included Leo Bezuidenhout's duck, and it was Thomas Beeney who did the real damage — 2-9 with three miserly maidens — well supported by William Roxburgh's 2-16 and my own 2-19, the latter nudging me past Mark Christmas into 11th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list, which I'll confess I'm rather chuffed about.

Chasing 161, it was William Roxburgh who made the afternoon his own — a magnificent unbeaten 107, bringing up 2,000 career runs for the club along the way — with Thomas Roxburgh's 20 anchoring a fourth-wicket stand of 78. Jonathan Sisley's golden duck was the only real blemish, while poor Aaron Hughes had a torrid time behind the stumps, conceding 8 byes in the swirling wind. We got there at 164/5 from 28 overs, five wickets in hand.

Two points, thoroughly earned, and a fine day's work all round — Sevenoaks won't have enjoyed that one nearly as much as we did.

Sun 16 Jul 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv NC Norton Sports CC · HomeformLDLLW

I called correctly at the toss on a blustery, showery afternoon at home to Norton Sports, and elected to bat — a decision I stand by in principle, if not entirely in outcome. We laboured to 124 all out from 30.4 overs, Luke Welsman the shining exception with a fine 48, while poor Theo Clements will want to forget his golden duck as quickly as the scorebook allows. A modest total, the kind that asks a great deal of your bowlers and rather less of your batsmen's nerves for the rest of the day.

And ask a great deal it did. Norton reached home at 126/2 in just 22.1 overs, Lewis Mitchell playing a genuinely classy 74 and Paddy Collins ushering them over the line unbeaten on 46. We did have our moments — Paul Kennard back in the hutch without so much as a run to his name, and Theo Clements, redeeming his earlier blob in some style, snaring 1-5 to be our pick of the bowlers. Junaid Mufti toiled honestly for 1-23 with two tidy maidens thrown in, proof that not everything went for runs even as the game slipped away from us.

I contributed my own quiet part along the way, and can at least take some comfort in sitting third in this season's Sunday 2nd XI run charts with 151 to my name. But comfort only stretches so far: beaten by eight wickets is a chastening scoreline by any measure. We'll dust ourselves down, have a word about our batting, and go again next week — Linton Park spirit undimmed, if a little damp.

Sat 15 Jul 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Gore Court CC · HomeformDDDDD

Saturday the 15th brought Gore Court to Linton Park, and with it a damp, blustery afternoon that felt like English summer doing its level best to unsettle both sides' plans. I won the toss and had no hesitation in batting first — the pitch looked too good to leave to chance, and for once my gut instinct didn't let me down.

We lost an early wicket with just 2 on the board, the sort of nervy start that has you reaching for a second cup of tea, but the lads steadied splendidly. Luke Welsman played the innings of the day, an unbeaten 77 that also brought up 5,000 career runs for the club — a landmark that deserves rather more than a line in a gazette, but the moment was wonderful to witness from the other end. I was happy to chip in with 64 not out, and Jordan Austin's 26 kept the scoreboard ticking, the crucial 51-run fourth-wicket stand steering us to a healthy 216/4.

With the ball, Inus Joubert was magnificent — 4-27 with three maidens, thoroughly miserly — well supported by Mardey Castle and Welsman again, who clearly wasn't done for the day. Gore Court fought hard through Paul Geary's 67 and Andy Brown's 39, but two early ducks for Scott Upward and Rex Singlehurst had put them behind the game, and they finished on 152/8.

A 64-run win, then, and a genuinely good day for the club.

Sat 15 Jul 2023 🧢 1st XIv Gore Court CC · AwayformDDDTD

Beaten by a duck – but not the sort you'll find in the Kentish sky over Gore Court.

As captain, the toss on Saturday was one decision I didn't lose sleep over: with a pitch that looked ripe for bowling first, I called correctly and had us straight into the field. Gore Court made a nervy start, four on the board and a wicket gone, before Ruhul Islam (33), Hari Krishnan (26) and an unbeaten Ben Dutnall (32) stitched together a stubborn 64-run stand for the seventh wicket to drag them towards respectability. But we kept chipping away — 50/3 became 58/6 in the blink of an eye, with Akhil Reji and Adam Collins both back in the pavilion without troubling the scorers. Mark Christmas was magnificent, 4-27, with Anthony Karassellos (2-25) and Toby Hughes (1-22) squeezing hard, and Alex Keeler tighter than a Sunday collection plate with two maidens. They closed on 155/9 from their 45 overs — a total we always felt was within range.

With the bat, William Roxburgh played the innings of the afternoon, an unbeaten 72, ably assisted by brother Thomas with a fluent 26, the pair putting on 69 for the first wicket to set the tone. We cantered home at 156/3 in just 23.5 overs.

Special mention, gently offered, to George Taylor, whose afternoon with the gloves included eight byes he'd rather forget — these things happen to the best of us.

A fine seven-wicket win, then, and the season charts keep ticking along nicely with Henry Bourdillon (347 runs) and Anthony Karassellos (21 wickets) leading the way. Onwards.

Wed 12 Jul 2023 🧢 Midweek XIv Penshurst Park CC · AwayformTLDWD

We travelled down to Penshurst Park CC on a damp but pleasant Wednesday evening, 12 July, and lost the toss — which, on reflection, was rather generous of us, handing them first knock and, as it turned out, rather too warm a bat.

Adam Ranson gave us both barrels early on, ploughing his way to a magnificent 143 while Theo Rimmer chipped in with a tidy 36, and by the time they declared themselves satisfied at 251/8 from their forty overs we were left wondering where our afternoon had gone. Credit where it's due, though: John Karassellos was superb with the ball, 3-20 and full value for it, Nolan Wilde chipped away for 3-42, Darrell Houghton-Judge picked up one for 16, and Nick Tromp bowled three maidens of admirable meanness. Small mercy, too, that Zane Khaleeque departed for a duck at our hands — every cloud, and all that. Aaron Hughes had a torrid time behind the stumps, mind, 12 byes slipping past him on a tricky afternoon with the gloves.

Chasing 252, Jordan Austin played an innings of real substance — 106, an out-and-out captain's dream — ably assisted by Nick Tromp's 20, with the sixth-wicket pair adding a crucial 58 that briefly had us dreaming. But 189 all out from 36.4 overs told its own story, and we fell 62 runs short.

There is a silver lining: Jordan's century pushes him past William Buck to 25th on the club's all-time run-scorers list — no small feat. But not our day, all told. Heads up, chins high, back to the nets.

Sun 09 Jul 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv HC Hadlow CC · AwayformWTDWW

Sunday the 9th of July found us trundling down to Hadlow on a warm, drizzly afternoon of the sort that makes an Englishman feel entirely at home. The coin fell their way, and they had no hesitation in sending us out to bat — which, on reflection, we made them regret.

We lost an early wicket with just four on the board, the sort of nervy start that has grown men reaching for the flask before the tea interval has even been mentioned. But Aaron Hughes settled things with a fine 44, Thomas Beeney chipped in handsomely with 36, and I was pleased to see us through with an unbeaten 25 as the fourth-wicket stand swelled to 56. Anthony Karassellos and Alex Wade both took the walk of shame for the Duck Club ledger, but a generous 25 extras suggested Hadlow's bowlers were as damp as the outfield. All out for 194 in 33.4 overs — a total with a bit of backbone to it.

With the ball, we struck early at 6-1 and never quite let Hadlow settle, though Ash Dixon's gutsy half-century threatened to spoil the script, ably supported by Alex Wilson and Jack Macdonald. Poor Jack Poore joined the ducks without troubling the scorers. Nick Pennefather was superb with 2-14, John Karassellos and Alex Wade both weighing in with 2-36 and 2-33 apiece, while Aaron Hughes endured a torrid time behind the stumps, ten byes slipping past him like eels.

Bowled them out for 170. A twenty-four-run win, two points thoroughly earned, and — with Thomas Roxburgh quietly purring up the season's charts — spirits high on the bus home.

Sun 09 Jul 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv NC New Ifield CC · AwayformWLDLL

Sunday the 9th of July, and off we trundled to New Ifield on an afternoon so warm and damp it felt like batting inside a kettle. The coin did us a favour for once, and I had no hesitation shoving us in — a decision that looked rather clever by close of play.

Glen Rawson set about compiling a proper captain's-dream hundred, unbeaten on 100, while Jordan Austin chipped in a handsome 69 alongside him. Even our extras column got in on the act with a generous 38, and we declared ourselves happy at 242/4 from the forty.

With the ball, we were relentless. New Ifield never got going, bundled out for 110, Harry Benning's battling 24 the only real resistance. Muralidharan Athikesavan and Herbie Parr departed for twin ducks, and Luke Welsman did the real damage with a superb 2-5. I chipped in with 2-15, Alexander Nunn took 2-22, and Zach Wilde bowled two miserly maidens to squeeze the life out of the innings. Our only blemish was a scattergun approach with the ball's line — 19 wides and 3 no-balls handed back runs we really didn't need to gift.

A word too for Glen, whose hundred edged him past Clive Newman into 14th on the club's all-time run-scorers list — and he now sits second in this year's Sunday 2nd XI run charts, with me lurking second in the wickets column.

A comfortable win by 132 runs. Not a bad way to spend a soggy Sunday.

Sat 08 Jul 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Kings Hill CC · AwayformDDDDD

The road took us to Kings Hill on a Saturday that couldn't decide whether it was summer or a car wash — warm, but thoroughly wet. I won the toss and had no hesitation in batting first, a decision I still stand by, whatever the scorebook says about my own part in it.

Benjamin Austin played the innings of the day, a fine 72, with Craig Sands giving sturdy support on 44 to help us to 177 all out from 33.5 overs. I can't claim any credit for the total myself — my own contribution was a golden duck, joined in that particular club by Nick Tromp and Thomas Beeney. The less said about my dismissal, the better.

In the field we fought hard to defend it. Hasham Khan's half-century (50) was the innings that hurt most, with Neil Miller (40) and Ashley Ulph (22) chipping in as Kings Hill crept to 181/9 from 39.4 overs. Nick Tromp was superb with the ball, 4-37, backed up nicely by Junaid Mufti (2-45) and Thomas Beeney (2-50), while Ben Clarke and Adam Smith struck twice for ducks of their own.

Small mercy amid the gloom: my 300th appearance in Linton colours, a landmark I'd have enjoyed rather more with a win attached. As it was, we fell by a single, agonising wicket. Heads up, and back to the nets.

Sat 08 Jul 2023 🧢 1st XIv BC Broadstairs CC · HomeformDDDDT

Saturday 08 July 2023, and Broadstairs CC rolled up on a scorching, showery afternoon that couldn't quite decide what it wanted to be — much like my toss call, except that one I got right. No hesitation: we batted first.

What followed was about as good as it gets. Thomas Roxburgh and William Roxburgh set about the Broadstairs attack in a 107-run opening stand before either of them so much as thought about getting out, Thomas going on to 63 and William to 61, with Henry Bourdillon chipping in a classy 59 to help us to a mighty 272/5 from our 45 overs. I can't claim much credit for that total beyond staying out of the way.

With the ball, we squeezed the life out of the reply. Callum McCormick departed without troubling the scorers, and although Ian Marshall played a lone hand of real substance with 57, the rest of the innings never got going against Broadstairs' 125/8. I had the pleasure of leading the attack with 2-2 — and a quiet word of celebration there, as those two wickets nudged me past John Ames into 12th on the club's all-time list — with Anthony Karassellos and Fred Taylor mopping up two apiece and Alex Keeler proving a positive miser with three maidens. I added 17 with the bat for good measure.

A 147-run win, then, on a day when the sun and the showers both turned up but only we did any real business. Onwards.

Wed 05 Jul 2023 🧢 Midweek XIv Warlingham CC · HomeformLTLDW

From the captain's chair — Wednesday 5 July 2023, and a rare treat as we welcomed Warlingham CC on a pleasant, damp afternoon. I won the toss and, with the outfield carrying a bit of moisture, fancied our chances setting a total. Not for the first time this season, the lads made me look rather clever.

What followed with the bat was, frankly, a joy. Aaron Hughes and Thomas Roxburgh put together a magnificent 162-run stand for the fifth wicket, each bringing up a hundred — 101 not out and 100 not out respectively — while Alex Wade chipped in a tidy 26 to help us close on 254/4 from our 33 overs. Nolan Wilde and Thomas Beeney contributed the traditional golden ducks, but nobody was counting those against a total like that.

In the field we were relentless. Sam Boyns was pick of the bowlers with 4-25, Thomas Beeney bowled a miserly 7 maidens on his way to 3-14, and Alex Wade weighed in with 1-31 — Grahame Webb departed without troubling the scorers as we ran through the middle order from 174-6 to 181-9 in a blur. Warlingham fought hard through Graham Dunning's fine 62 and a 52-run third-wicket stand, but folded to 183/9 from their 54. Poor Laurie Probert had a torrid time behind the stumps, 20 byes going begging — though he can console himself that Thomas Beeney's three wickets nudged him past Gordon Fenner into 16th on the club's all-time list.

A draw, then — honours shared, and honestly, after a total like ours, a touch generous to the visitors.

Sun 02 Jul 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv HC Harrietsham CC · AwayformWWLDL

Beaten? Only just, and only by a side who batted rather better than we bowled and bowled rather better than we batted. Overcast skies at Harrietsham, and I put us into the field first — a decision I'd happily repeat, given Tim Thirkell's 3-28 restricted them to 181/6 from their forty overs despite a watchful 39 from Akhil Balagopal and useful support from Rod Martenstyn (31) and B Bala, unbeaten on 30. Zach Wilde and Ian Hollingworth chipped in with a wicket apiece, and we had the satisfaction of sending Fred King back for a golden duck. All told, a total that felt gettable on a good pitch.

It was not, alas, a good pitch for us. Our reply folded for 55 in 21.5 overs, a collapse comprehensive enough that Zach Wilde and John Karassellos both made their way back for ducks of their own, adding two more names to the club's ledger of shame. I did my bit with the bat, one small consolation among the wreckage, but there was no arresting the slide. I now sit fourth in the 2023 Sunday 2nd XI run charts with 135 to my name, which felt like scant comfort walking off.

There was, happily, one moment to raise a cap for: Tim Thirkell brought up his 1000th appearance in Linton colours, a landmark that rather dwarfs anything that happened with bat or ball, and one he marked fittingly by continuing to lead our wicket charts with 11 for the season.

Beaten this time, then, comfortably and honestly. We dust ourselves down and go again.

Sun 02 Jul 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Mersham Le Hatch CC · HomeformWWTDW

Skipper's Log — Sunday 2nd July, and Mersham Le Hatch rolled up for what turned into a proper afternoon of cricket under grey but agreeable skies. The coin let us down again — I really must practise my calling — so we were put into the field first, which suited nobody's post-lunch digestion but did the job nicely in the end.

They got off to a wobble at 4-1, recovered through a stubborn 75-run stand for the fifth wicket, and Alex Markwick's fifty gave their innings some backbone, with Aaron Cook and Steve Edge chipping in either side of twenty. But we turned the screw beautifully in the middle overs, tumbling them from 111-5 to 121-8 before they were all out for 145 off their forty. Thomas Roxburgh was superb with the ball — 3-16 and two maidens, not a run given away lightly — with Nick Tromp (3-21) and Darrell Houghton-Judge (1-10) doing the honest graft either side of him. I managed a wicket myself along the way, which quietly nudged me past John Ames and into 11th on the club's all-time list — not bad for an afternoon's work.

Chasing 146, Roxburgh continued his fine day with the bat this time, 49 well made, while Benjamin Austin's unbeaten 47 and Jordan Austin's 23 steadied things after a crucial 95-run third-wicket stand. Eight byes gave poor Aaron Hughes behind the stumps a testing afternoon, but no matter — we cantered home in 25.2 overs. A special mention for Benjamin Austin, marking his 200th appearance in Linton colours in some style. A fine win by seven wickets. Onwards.

Sat 01 Jul 2023 🧢 3rd XIv Linden Park CC · AwayformWWL

Right, another Saturday, another road trip — this time to Linden Park, warm and cloudy overhead and, for once, everything going roughly to plan.

Put into the field first, we let their top order do the early damage: Dhruvin Patel brought up a fine fifty, with Gareth Thomas (44) and Jonah Wilson (26) chipping in around him to push them to 178/8 from their forty. But it wasn't all one-way traffic — Jack Warren, Saharsh Abhinay and John Hoare all trooped back for ducks against our attack, which at least gave the scorebook a bit of variety. Michaela Karassellos was the pick of the bowlers with 2-14, backed up nicely by Thomas Mundell (2-22) and James Gray (2-27). A total that looked competitive on a good pitch, but not out of reach.

And so it proved. We chased it down for the loss of four wickets with overs to spare, finishing on 179/4 in 32.2. Anthony Karassellos anchored the whole innings with an unbeaten 87, well supported by Glen Rawson (34) and Srikrishna Challa (23) — and along the way brought up 1,000 career runs for the club, which is the kind of milestone that deserves rather more than the polite ripple of applause it probably got. I chipped in with the ball earlier on and was happy enough to watch the run chase unfold from the boundary rope with a cup of tea.

A comfortable win, a landmark reached, and the drive home felt a good deal shorter than the one out. Can't ask for much more than that.

Sat 01 Jul 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Holcombe & Blue Bell Hill CC · AwayformDDDDD

From the captain's chair — Saturday 01 July 2023. The road took us to Holcombe & Blue Bell Hill CC, under warm skies and a decent covering of cloud, which is about as close to English perfection as this fixture gets.

We batted first and made a fair fist of it, closing on 268/7 from our forty overs. Jordan Austin was the man of the moment, striding to 65 and well past his fifty, with Aaron Hughes (44) and Junaid Mufti (43) lending sturdy support in the middle order. It was the sort of total that makes the tea urn taste that bit sweeter.

Defending it, we set about our work with the ball, and Tim Thirkell was magnificent, tearing through with 4-38, while Nolan Wilde chipped in with 3-30 and I was pleased enough with my own 1-9. Junaid Mufti, not content with his runs, bowled two tidy maidens for good measure. Rich Williams and Shoaib Wangde both departed without troubling the scorers, sent back by our attack, though Andy Bunker played the innings of the day with a well-crafted 58, ably assisted by Anoop Veliyambra (26 not out) and Kevin Shipton (21). They finished on 164/9 from their forty overs — enough to deny us, not enough to beat us.

Two milestones lit up the afternoon: Benjamin Austin brought up his 200th appearance in Linton colours, and Laurie Probert reached 4,000 career runs for the club — both thoroughly deserved and duly toasted.

So, honours shared, a draw when neither side could force the issue. Not the win the bowling deserved, but a fine day's cricket all the same.

Sat 01 Jul 2023 🧢 1st XIv Addington Village CC · HomeformDDDDD

As Linton Park CC's captain, I called it right at the toss on Saturday and fancied our chances with the bat first — a decision that, in the fullness of a warm, showery afternoon, I'll neither fully defend nor fully regret. We slipped to 7 for 1 early doors and never quite shook off that stumble, eventually folding for 115 in 33.2 overs. Luke Welsman carried his bat superbly for an unbeaten 27, the lone beacon of composure in an innings that otherwise had the jitters of a man facing his mother-in-law's Sunday roast.

Addington Village, chasing that same total, looked to be cruising at times but our bowlers had other ideas. Alex Keeler was magnificent, ripping through with 3 for 7 off a miserly six maidens, ably backed by Toby Hughes (2-22) and Mark Christmas (2-23) — not a run given away lightly. We had them 14 for 4 in a blink, and though Chris Slater's unbeaten 42 and Asanka Najith's 25 threatened to drag it away from us, along with a stubborn 51-run ninth-wicket stand, we clawed them back to all out for exactly 115. I chipped in with the bat earlier and was pleased to see us bowl with such discipline. Spare a thought too for Martin Harris, whose solitary wicket quietly nudged him up the club's all-time list.

A tie. After a full day's cricket, not a run between us — cricket doing what it does best, refusing to be predictable, and leaving both sides walking off scratching their heads in mutual, good-humoured bewilderment.

Thu 29 Jun 2023 🧢 Twenty20v NC Newington CC · HomeformLWWLW

From the captain's chair — Thursday 29 June 2023, and Newington CC our visitors on a warm, drizzly afternoon that felt more suited to ducks (of the feathered variety) than cricket. I lost the toss, as is customary, and we were put into the field... sorry, put in to bat, which suited us rather nicely as it turned out.

Our openers set the tone beautifully, putting on 83 before the first wicket fell, and from there George Taylor simply refused to get out, finishing unbeaten on a fine 66. Toby Hughes chipped in with 36 and Jordan Austin 32, and we posted a handsome 178/3 from our twenty overs — the sort of total that makes the tea taste that bit sweeter.

Newington replied with intent, racing to 68 before we prised out their opener, and Matthew Daniels' 44 kept them in the hunt, well supported by Hugo Parnell's unbeaten 32 and Thomas Jones' 21. But Fred Taylor was in destructive mood, plucking out 3-7, with Luke Welsman (1-5) and Nick Tromp (1-25) squeezing from the other end — and somewhere in there poor Aron Washer trudged off for a golden duck. Our wicketkeeper had a torrid time of it, gifting nine byes, which I shall put down to the drizzle and nothing else.

They closed on 141/6, well short of the mark, and we ran out winners by 37 runs. A thoroughly good day for the club — George now sits second in our Twenty20 run charts, Fred tops the wickets, and I shall be buying the first round at the bar tonight.

Wed 28 Jun 2023 🧢 Midweek XIv SC Sevenoaks & District Wednesday CC · HomeformLLTLD

Under a warm, drizzly Wednesday sky, we welcomed Sevenoaks & District Wednesday CC, and lost the toss for our trouble — they had the sense to bat first while we squelched about in the field. Their innings ambled to 125 all out in 31.3 overs, Nigel Shaw the chief architect with 26, while poor Eric Clemming trudged off for a duck without so much as a nibble at the scorebook. The bowling honours were shared around handsomely: Thomas Beeney was the pick with 2-11 and two tidy maidens, miserly as a Yorkshireman with the last biscuit, while John Karassellos (2-20) and Thomas Roxburgh (2-27) chipped in to keep things honest.

Chasing 126, we made harder work of it than the target perhaps deserved, but got there in 21.2 overs for the loss of six. Thomas Roxburgh top-scored with a composed 31 not out — the innings that mattered most — ably backed up by Tobey Castle's 26 and Aaron Hughes's 24. Spare a thought for Luke Welsman, who contributed a golden duck to proceedings and will no doubt be reminded of it at the bar.

A tidy personal footnote: Martin Harris's solitary wicket nudged him past John Ames into 11th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list — history quietly being rewritten between overs. Thomas Roxburgh, meanwhile, sits proudly atop both the Midweek XI's run and wicket charts for the season.

Four wickets to the good, then, and a thoroughly satisfactory afternoon's work — messy, damp, and thoroughly ours.

Sun 25 Jun 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Offham CC · HomeformLWWLD

Sunday 25 June saw Offham CC pitch up on a scorching afternoon, and losing the toss to be sent out to bowl in that heat felt like the first blow before a ball had even been struck. Their openers made themselves thoroughly at home, putting on 64 before we prised the first one out, and John Olufawo went on to compile a magnificent 131 — the sort of innings you applaud through gritted teeth. James Tricker (23) and Dave Tucker (20) chipped in as the total swelled to a stiff 240/5. I did what I could with the new ball, finishing with 2-34, and had good company in Srikrishna Challa (1-24) and John Karassellos (1-27), but 240 was always going to take some chasing.

And chase we did, gamely if not gloriously. Glen Rawson played the innings of the day, motoring past his fifty, with Richard Piper (24) and Frank Harbord (21) offering support. As for the captain, I contributed a golden duck — bowled by too much back-of-a-length nonsense that I really ought to have put square of the wicket rather than watched sail past my stumps. We shall, as agreed, draw a veil over it. All out for 148, a defeat by 92 runs.

There was one crumb of personal comfort amid the wreckage: passing 100 career wickets, which I'll allow myself a quiet smile about over a warm pint. Not our day, all told — heads up, and back to the nets.

Sun 25 Jun 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Bearsted CC · AwayformLWWTD

Sunday 25 June saw us make the trip to Bearsted CC in what turned out to be a proper thriller. Lost the toss, put in to field – not the start we wanted, but the lads set about it well enough. Christian Roberts had other ideas about our afternoon, though, cashing in with a superb 132, and Alex Lush chipped in with 45 as their fourth-wicket pair put on a chastening 168. Credit where it's due to Nick Tromp, whose 4-40 (with Thomas Roxburgh and Luke Welsman chipping in) at least kept the total to 236/6, and James West's golden duck was one small mercy. Still, 237 to win from 40 overs is a tall order against a total like that.

What followed was the stuff village cricket dreams are made of. Thomas Roxburgh, having already done his bit with the ball, decided he'd do the job with the bat too, carving out a magnificent unbeaten 109. Benjamin Austin (34) and Darrell Houghton-Judge (33) played their parts, but it was the ninth-wicket pair adding a nerveless 61 that dragged us over the line with one wicket to spare – Luke Welsman and Ian Hollingworth both walking back for ducks along the way, bless them.

Two points, and thoroughly earned. Nerve-shredding, occasionally farcical, ultimately glorious – exactly why we play this daft game.

Sat 24 Jun 2023 🧢 2nd XIv HC Hunton Wanderers CC · HomeformDDDDD

Here's the match report:

Saturday 24 June brought Hunton Wanderers to Linton Park, and I'll confess the coin didn't fall our way — losing the toss on a warm, showery afternoon isn't the worst fate, mind, as it meant first use of the ball and I fancied there might be a bit in it for the seamers. So it proved. Darrell Houghton-Judge tore through with figures of 3-1 that will have the visitors wincing for weeks, Nick Tromp bowled with metronomic discipline for 3-17 including four maidens, and Inus Joubert chipped in with 2-21 to wrap Hunton Wanderers up for 120 in 36.5 overs, Jack Crouch's 23 the only real resistance. I'll spare our two openers, Stephen Puxty and Simon Taylor, further embarrassment beyond noting they returned without troubling the scorers — these things happen to the best of us, gentlemen.

Chasing 121, Benjamin Austin played the innings of the day with a fine 43, well supported by Aaron Hughes's unbeaten 31, and I was happy enough to potter along for 19 of my own as we cantered home on 121/3 in just 21.1 overs. A particularly warm round of applause, though, for Benjamin, who brought up 4,000 career runs for the club in the same innings — the sort of landmark that deserves more than a passing mention in the tea hut.

Seven wickets, two points, and a thoroughly deserved victory. On this evidence, the Wanderers never really had an answer — and neither, frankly, did our openers' bats, but no matter. We'll take it.

Sat 24 Jun 2023 🧢 1st XIv Mersham Sports CC · AwayformDDDDD

Skipper's Log — Saturday 24 June 2023, away to Mersham Sports CC, under grey skies that couldn't decide whether to rain on us or not.

Winning the toss, I had no hesitation in taking first knock, and for once the decision looked positively shrewd. We rattled along to 238 all out in 44.5 overs, built chiefly on a fine 79 from Henry Bourdillon, well backed by Harrison Fermor's 45 and George Taylor's 32. Poor Thomas Roxburgh will want to forget his contribution entirely, departing for a duck, but the total had the look of a competitive one on a used pitch.

Mersham, however, had other ideas, and one man in particular did. Jamie Mcvittie played the innings of the day, a magnificent 114, and with Ashley Cook (44) and Shineyu Anand (42) offering sturdy support, the home side pushed us hard, reaching 233/6 from their 45 overs. Toby Hughes was the pick of our attack with 2-47, Harrison Fermor chipped in with 2-65, and Mark Christmas took one for 25 — while Parth Tewari, at least, made the walk back without troubling the scorers. I managed a watchful 25 with the bat, which felt like the least I could do given how close things got.

In the end we held our nerve, and Mersham's, to win by five runs — the kind of nail-biter that ages a captain by several years but tastes all the sweeter for it. A thoroughly good day for the club.

Thu 22 Jun 2023 🧢 Twenty20v Headcorn CC · HomeformWLWWL

A grey Thursday it may have been, but nothing dampened the mood as we welcomed Headcorn CC to Linton Park. Batting first, we set about building something substantial, and Nick Tromp led from the front with a composed unbeaten 66, well supported by Benjamin Austin's 62. I chipped in with 20 of my own, though the same could not be said for Toby Hughes, Harrison Fermor and Luke Welsman, who between them contributed nothing but three golden ducks — the kind of collective batting collapse that gives a captain grey hairs to match the weather. Still, 181/7 from our twenty overs was a total to be proud of, and gave the bowlers something to defend.

Defend it we did. Headcorn's Luke Mangold played a fine hand of 56, with James Barker and Bradley Peters-Burr chipping in either side of him, but our attack kept chipping away throughout. Mardey Castle was pick of the bowlers with 2-28, and I was pleased to get among the wickets myself with 1-2, Jordan Austin adding 1-16 for good measure. Headcorn fell short at 153/4, and the win was ours.

A word too for Benjamin Austin, who brought up 4,000 career runs for the club during his innings — a landmark achieved in some style. All told, a thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work, ducks and all: a win to savour.

Sun 18 Jun 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Beckenham CC · AwayformLLWWT

From the captain's chair, I have to say Beckenham did their best to drown us before a ball was bowled. Warm it may have been, but "thoroughly wet" is doing some heavy lifting in my notes, and the outfield looked more suited to punting than cricket. Still, I called it right for once and stuck them in.

It didn't start badly — an early wicket with just 4 on the board had us dreaming of a rout — but Darren Butler had other ideas, compiling a fine 91 and putting on 115 for the second wicket with support from Ross Piller (30) and Ken Hoad (28) to drag them to 219/6 from their 35 overs. I managed to have a hand in slowing things down, finishing with 2-27, which I'm reliably informed nudges me past Mark Christmas into 12th on the club's all-time wicket list — small mercies for the knees. Henry Bourdillon's miserly 1-7 and Anthony Karassellos's 1-27 did their bit too.

Chasing 220, we barely got our pads dry before the heavens properly intervened, our reply closing at 66/0 from just 8 overs, Benjamin Austin unbeaten on a breezy 44. Sixteen byes, mind you, tell their own soggy story about a testing afternoon behind the stumps for Benjamin.

So, honours shared — a draw wrenched from the weather rather than earned in the field. Not the day for glory, but nobody's grumbling into their tea.

Sun 18 Jun 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Teston CC · HomeformWLWWL

Sunday 18 June, and Teston CC rolled up on a warm, showery afternoon for what turned into one of those honours-even affairs club cricket does so well. Batting first, we posted a respectable 107/5 from our 32 overs, the bulk of it fashioned by Theo Clements, whose unbeaten 56 was the innings in miniature — calm, watchful, and exactly the sort of half-century you build a total around. Richard Piper's contribution, by contrast, was a golden duck, the kind of nought that draws a sympathetic groan from the boundary and a pint bought in consolation afterwards.

With the ball, we were rather more ruthless. Teston's reply simply never got going, and their innings folded for precisely nothing — a collapse so complete it barely needs embellishing. I chipped in with the bowling myself, and it's pleasing to note I currently sit third in the 2023 Sunday 2nd XI run charts with 131 to my name this season, though modesty forbids dwelling on it further.

With the weather doing its best to interfere and both sides digging in when it mattered, honours were shared — a draw that, on the balance of the afternoon, probably flattered nobody and disappointed nobody either. Theo's half-century deserved a victory to sit alongside it, and our bowlers deserved better luck with the rain-softened outfield, but a draw against decent opposition on a tricky day is no disgrace. We'll take it, dust off the whites, and go again next Sunday.

Sat 17 Jun 2023 🧢 3rd XIv Bearsted CC · HomeformWW

Saturday saw Bearsted CC visit Linton Park, and having lost the toss, we were invited to have a bowl first — never one to turn down an over or two before tea. It began promisingly, an early wicket falling with just 8 on the board, but our joy was short-lived: their last pair, showing the sort of stubbornness usually reserved for a stuck deckchair, put on an unwanted 78 to see them to 172/9. Credit where due — Daniel Skinner's 46 not out and Nigel Baker's 24 did the damage at the top, but our bowlers had their say too. Thuraiappah Pushpavinothan was superb with 2-6, Reuben Mundell metronomic with 2-17 and three maidens, and Srikrishna Challa chipped in with 2-30.

Chasing 173, we mustered 151 all out in 33.2 overs — a touch light, though Srikrishna Challa's 40 and Theo Clements' 31 gave us hope, ably supplemented by a generous 40 in extras. Thomas Mundell, alas, was undone for a golden duck, and your correspondent must confess to a duck of his own — the less written about that innings, the better.

Ten byes told the tale of a testing day behind the stumps for Glen Rawson, and 28 wides plus 6 no-balls handed Bearsted runs we could scarcely spare. In the end, 21 runs short. Chastening, certainly, but with Srikrishna Challa leading both our run and wicket charts this season, there's plenty to build on. We'll be better for it next week.

Sat 17 Jun 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Sherwood CC, Kent · HomeformLDDDD

A warm one, this, with the showers threatening but never quite committing — much like Sherwood's run chase, as it turned out. Winning the toss and choosing to bat felt like the right call, and Richard Piper made sure of it with a magnificent century, timing the ball beautifully all afternoon while I hung about at the other end long enough to nudge my way to 87, which I shan't pretend didn't feel rather splendid. Aaron Hughes finished unbeaten on 22 as we posted 248 for 4 from our forty overs, a total that had a bit of everything about it.

With the ball, we set about the task with real purpose. Nick Tromp was the pick of the attack by some distance, bowling with real venom to return 4 for 24, while Nolan Wilde chipped in with three and Darrell Houghton-Judge two. Michael Hooker departed for a duck, which never does much for a batsman's afternoon, and though Luke Loader, Owen Tingley and Shaun McManus all found some form for the visitors, Sherwood were bowled out for 151 in the 37th over.

Honours shared, then, a draw when neither side could quite land the decisive blow — though with the season charts showing me leading the runs and Nolan top of the wickets, there's no shortage of form to carry forward. A good afternoon's cricket, all told, and honestly, could we really have asked for more?

Sat 17 Jun 2023 🧢 1st XIv Rodmersham CC · AwayformDDDDD

Saturday 17th June saw us head to Rodmersham CC on a warm, sticky sort of afternoon — the kind where the covers stay in but the shirts still end up wringing wet. I called correctly at the toss, which is roughly as often as I manage it these days, and had no hesitation whatsoever in sticking us in to bat.

We compiled 215 for 9 from our 45 overs, a total that owed most of its shape to Harrison Fermor's fine 37, with useful support from Luke Welsman (29) and Alex Keeler (21). Poor Mark Christmas will not want reminding that he departed for a duck, though I suspect the gazette will remind him anyway.

Defending it, Rodmersham gave us a proper fright. Rob Horne played beautifully for an unbeaten 55, backed by Kevin Jones (44) and Max Lateu (33), and for a good while it looked like our bowlers might be chasing shadows. Toby Hughes had other ideas, tearing in for a superb 4 for 29, with Mark Christmas and Harrison Fermor chipping in with a wicket apiece, while Alex Keeler strangled the middle overs with four maidens. I added 20 with the bat and did what I could to keep things ticking along from the captain's end.

In the end we held on for a 14-run win — two points, thoroughly earned, and a rare afternoon where the toss, the bat and the ball all went our way at once.

Sun 11 Jun 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Chelsfield CC · HomeformLWLWW

Sunday 11th June, and Chelsfield rolled into Linton Park under one of those scorching-yet-grey skies only an English summer can conjure. I called correctly at the toss – a rare enough event to note in itself – and had no hesitation in putting them in.

It looked, for a good while, like the shrewdest decision I'd made all year. But Asjad Mir had other ideas, ghosting to an unbeaten 116 and dragging Chelsfield to 228/6 from their 35 overs with Isaac George's 48 alongside him. Alexander Nunn did his level best to have a word with the scorebook, snaring 3-25, well backed by Frank Harbord (2-40) and Tim Thirkell (1-34), but 228 always looked a stiff ask on a slow outfield.

And so it proved, agonisingly. Will Thew batted like a man possessed, or perhaps just a man who fancied a nice round number – his magnificent 105 brought up 6,000 career runs for the club, which is the sort of milestone that deserves a pint regardless of the result. Anthony Karassellos supported nobly with 50, I contributed a watchful 16, and we finished on 224/4. Four runs short. Four.

Tim Thirkell leads our wicket charts this summer and Will now sits second among the run-getters, so the season ticks along nicely even as this particular afternoon slipped from our grasp. Heads up, chins forward, back to the nets – Chelsfield had the width of a gnat's whisker, and not a run more.

Sun 11 Jun 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Stowting CC · AwayformLLLWW

Stowting hosted us on a scorching, grey afternoon of the sort only an English June can produce, and lost the toss-winner's advantage entirely on our behalf — they had first use of the bat, and made merry with it. Emile Haratbar carved out an unbeaten 98, riding shotgun on an opening stand of 80 that set the tone before we'd had a chance to get our boots dirty, with Kane Wheeler (34) and Ryder Wallis (26) chipping in as they climbed to 219/6 from their forty overs. Ian Hollingworth kept us in the contest with a fine 3-38, well supported by Thomas Beeney's 1-31, but 219 always looked a stiff ask on a day when the outfield ran quick and the bowling ran short of luck.

Chasing it down, Luke Welsman played the innings of the summer — 52 not out, calm as you like — anchored by a watchful 60-run stand for the second wicket alongside Toby Joseph (40), with Benjamin Austin (34) adding useful heft. Poor Ian Hollingworth, having done his bowling job admirably, then walked for a golden duck — cricket's cruellest little joke, and one the Duck Club ledger will not let him forget. Our keeper had a torrid time of it too, 11 byes leaking through like the afternoon drizzle.

And so, after a full day's honest toil in the field and at the crease, we finished level — 219 apiece, not a run between us. You could not have separated Linton Park and Stowting with a ruler. A tie feels almost too tidy a word for a match that gave everything and settled nothing; call it honours shared, pride intact, and the Duck Club richer by one very expensive quack.

Sat 10 Jun 2023 🧢 2nd XIv SC Swanscombe & Greenhithe CC · AwayformLLDDD

Saturday 10 June saw us make the trip to Swanscombe & Greenhithe, under a sky that couldn't decide whether it was sulking or sweltering. I lost the toss again — my coin-calling remains, at best, a work in progress — and we were put into the field.

Not that it did them much good. Swanscombe were bowled out for 147 in 40 overs, with Vishwas Shinde (37) and Alfie Towell (31) offering the only real resistance, while poor Aprameya Kar trudged off without so much as troubling the scorers. Thomas Beeney was the chief architect of the collapse, spinning his way to a magnificent 5-47, with Nolan Wilde (3-15) and Tim Thirkell (1-19) mopping up in support. Nick Tromp, meanwhile, bowled with the miserliness of a man checking the pub round twice, sending down five maidens.

Chasing 148, we made light work of it, cruising home on 148/2 from 31.2 overs. Luke Welsman played the innings of the day, an unbeaten 66, with Richard Piper (52 not out) providing sturdy company at the other end — both well-made fifties that took the game away from Swanscombe in short order. I contributed a tidy 20 myself, though Aaron Hughes will want to forget his duck as quickly as possible.

Eight wickets the margin, two points banked, and the sun, for once, on our side of the ledger. A thoroughly satisfying afternoon's work.

Sat 10 Jun 2023 🧢 1st XIv Chestfield CC · HomeformDDDDD

What a way to spend a scorching Saturday — twenty-two men, two innings, and not a single result to show for it by close of play.

Winning the toss and batting first felt like the right call under that sun, though 209 all out from 42.5 overs was more a case of us clinging on than cantering to a total. I found some rhythm early and kept finding it, eventually getting to 92 before running out of partners — the closest I've come to a hundred in a while, and I'll take the six thousand career runs that came with it as fair consolation for falling short of three figures. Mark Christmas chipped in nicely with 37 and George Taylor with 31, though poor Alex Keeler will be entered into the ledger for a duck, and no doubt reminded of it at the bar.

Defending the total, we set about Chestfield with real intent. I managed to find some rhythm with the ball too, taking 3-30, with Anthony Karassellos (2-26) and Alex Keeler (1-32) offering fine support, and we had the satisfaction of sending Jacob Meredith back for nought. But Paul Gibson had other ideas, compiling a classy 69, well supported by Stewart Murrell's unbeaten 30 and Pearson Hulks' 22, and Chestfield closed on 191/8 to deny us.

A draw, then — honours shared, and on a day this hot, perhaps a fair result for two sides who gave everything and had nothing left to force the issue.

Sun 04 Jun 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Tonbridge CC · HomeformWLLLW

Sunday last saw us welcome Tonbridge CC under a sky bright enough to make even our square look half-decent, and I duly lost the toss — a sequence that continues to suggest my coin-flipping has not improved since school. Asked to field, we watched Tonbridge motor to 206/4 from their 49 overs, with Mike Jessop the chief architect on 79 not out, well supported by Stefan Ronan (40) and Ryan Aikman (35). I can't claim we ran through them, but I did at least keep things tidy with 1-17, while Chris Howson and Jordan Austin chipped in with a wicket apiece, and Mardey Castle bowled with a miser's discipline — three maidens and barely a run given away lightly.

Chasing 207 to win is no formality, but Henry Bourdillon had other ideas, striking a magnificent 88 to carry our innings, with Benjamin Austin (44) and an unbeaten Luke Welsman (34) lending fine support. The platform was set early — 68 for the first wicket before Tonbridge managed a breakthrough — and from there it was a matter of composure rather than heroics, getting us home at 209/5 with overs to spare. Benjamin Austin's afternoon with the gloves was rather less serene, eight byes slipping through in the sort of performance best filed under "character-building."

Two points, thoroughly earned, and a five-wicket win to send everyone home for their tea in good spirits. Bourdillon's runs keep him top of our season's charts, and on this evidence, long may it continue.

Sun 04 Jun 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Chelsfield Park CC · AwayformLLWLW

Off we went on Sunday the 4th of June to Chelsfield Park CC, where I called correctly and, with the sun out and something in the pitch, sent them in — a decision I was quietly rather proud of come close of play.

The lads bowled and fielded with real purpose. Chelsfield stumbled early to 2-1, but a stubborn 81-run second-wicket stand threatened to drag them away from us, built on innings of 41 from Shankar Swaminathan, 32 from Vijay Ganesh and 30 from Anirudha Sengupta. Lenin Jeyaraj, at least, departed for a golden duck at our hands, which cheered us no end. It was Nick Tromp who turned the afternoon, spinning his way to a magnificent 6-34 and leaving the rest of us mere onlookers, with Anton Bourdillon (2-15) and John Karassellos (2-31) mopping up the tail. All out 214 from 39.3 overs — a total that felt about forty runs light of what it might have been.

Chasing 215, we made light work of it. Glen Rawson batted with real class for an unbeaten 97, ably assisted by Richard Piper's fine 76, and with 46 generously donated in extras, we cantered home at 219/1 in just 33.2 overs — eight wickets to spare. Poor Johan Eloff had a torrid afternoon behind the stumps, shipping 17 byes, though nobody seemed to mind by the time the last runs were in. Piper now leads our Sunday 2nd XI run charts with 223, and Tromp sits second in the wickets. A thoroughly good day for the club.

Sat 03 Jun 2023 🧢 2nd XIv New Ash Green CC · HomeformWLLDD

Saturday the 3rd of June found us at home to New Ash Green CC under a sky that couldn't quite decide whether to spoil the picnic — overcast, pleasant, the sort of afternoon village cricket was invented for. I lost the toss, was invited to have a bowl, and duly discovered that hospitality only extends so far: our visitors piled up 217/4 from their forty overs. An early wicket for just 7 gave us hope of a tidy afternoon, but a stand of 93 for the second wicket put paid to that notion, with Noel Delaffon's fifty (65) the backbone and Joe Elisak (52 not out) and Dean Freeman (46) filling their boots either side of him. Credit to the bowlers for not simply waving the white flag — Nick Tromp led the way with 1-36, Nolan Wilde chipped in 1-40 with two admirably parsimonious maidens, and Junaid Mufti took 1-43.

Chasing 218, we made a proper fist of it. A third-wicket stand of 58 gave the innings its shape, Richard Piper made a sturdy 41 and Craig Sands an unbeaten 25, while I had the pleasure of carrying things along to 66 — a personal highlight in an otherwise chastening afternoon. We finished 199/7, eighteen runs short. Craig Sands now leads our 2nd XI run charts for the season with 128, and Sam King tops the wicket pile with 6. Beaten, but not disgraced — we'll be better for it next week.

Sat 03 Jun 2023 🧢 1st XIv Leeds & Broomfield CC · AwayformDDDDD

I stood at the toss on a pleasant, overcast afternoon at Leeds & Broomfield, called wrong as ever, and watched them elect to field. No matter — we made them pay for it. A stand of 104 for the second wicket set the tone, Henry Bourdillon cracking a fine 60 and Mark Christmas easing to an unbeaten 57, while I was fortunate enough to find some rhythm myself and get to 78. George Taylor and Jordan Austin will not thank me for mentioning their ducks, but the Duck Club ledger must be kept honest, and 257/7 from our 45 overs was a total to be proud of regardless.

Defending it was, for once, the easy part. Anthony Karassellos was in menacing form, scything through them for 4-29, well backed up by Fred Taylor's 2-24 and Mardey Castle's 2-39, the latter also tying them down with two tidy maidens. Tim Dibble's 27 and useful contributions from Nick Prime and Fred Roberts were the only real resistance, while Owen Matthews and Marcus Prime departed for two more entries in the Duck Club book. They were bowled out for 140 in the 45th over, and we ran out winners by 117 runs.

A word too for Martin Harris, whose solitary wicket nudged him past Mark Christmas into 12th on the club's all-time list — history quietly made while the rest of us were busy celebrating. All told, a thumping win, a fine team performance, and precisely the sort of Saturday that makes the drive home feel a good deal shorter.

Mon 29 May 2023 🧢 Chairman's XIv Linton Park CC · Homeform—

Here's the match report:

Monday evening brought us a grey but pleasant afternoon for the visit of Linton Park CC, and having called correctly at the toss I had no hesitation whatsoever in sticking us in to bat first. It proved a shrewd call, or possibly just a lucky one, as the openers set about the bowling with real intent, putting on a crucial 92 for the first wicket before the breakthrough finally came. From there Craig Sands went serenely to an unbeaten fifty, well supported by James Piper's 39 and Nolan Wilde's 27 not out, as we posted a handsome 163/4 from our twenty overs. I chipped in with the bat myself, keeping the innings ticking along nicely. Not every contribution sparkled, mind — poor Frank Harbord will want to forget his afternoon in a hurry, departing for a golden duck, though I'm reliably informed the club gazette never lets these things go quietly.

With the season charts now taking shape, Craig Sands sits proudly atop the Chairman's XI run charts on 50, while Inus Joubert continues to lead the way for the South African XI on 46 — friendly rivalries to keep an eye on as the summer unfolds.

In the field we defended our total with the required discipline, seeing Linton Park off by a comfortable 41 runs. A thoroughly good day for the club, and one that sends us home rather pleased with ourselves, ducks and all.

Sun 28 May 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv YC Yalding CC · AwayformLLLWL

From the captain's chair — Sunday 28 May 2023. We travelled to Yalding on a pleasant, grey afternoon, the kind that threatens rain but never quite commits, and I duly won the toss and elected to bat. The right call, I felt, and for once I was right.

Richard Piper set about proving me correct with a well-made 79, the kind of innings that makes captaincy look easy, and I was glad to play my part alongside him, getting to 53 not out and, rather more pleasingly, bringing up 1,000 career runs for the club along the way — not a bad way to spend a Sunday. Alex Wade's afternoon began and ended with a golden duck, for which sympathy was offered and gratefully, if briefly, received. Thirty-five extras rounded out a healthy 181/5 from our forty overs.

Defending it was another matter entirely. Yalding, through Dewi Beer's unbeaten 44 and useful contributions from Samuel Faulkner and Matthew Massett, dragged themselves to within sniffing distance. Srikrishna Challa did the heavy lifting with 3-48, well backed up by Zach Wilde and Tim Thirkell with two apiece, and between them they kept just enough back for the finish to matter.

In the end we squeaked home by five runs — the sort of margin that ages a captain prematurely but tastes all the sweeter for it. A good day for the club, and, milestones aside, precisely the kind of nervy, scrappy win village cricket was invented for.

Sun 28 May 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Newenden CC · HomeformWWLLL

From the captain's chair — Sunday 28 May 2023, and Newenden CC the visitors on a pleasant, grey afternoon perfectly suited to the game we love. I won the toss and had no hesitation in putting them in; the right call, I felt, and for once I shall allow myself the satisfaction of saying so.

Newenden made themselves at home, racing to 220/8 from their 40 overs on the back of a monumental 133-run stand for the second wicket. Mike Parr brought up a chanceless hundred — 103 of pure discomfort for us in the field — with Jonathan Bourne (47) and Mike Bellhouse (20) offering sturdy support. Small mercies: we did at least see off Christian Kutner without him troubling the scorers. With the ball, Luke Welsman was outstanding, 3-37, well backed by Anthony Karassellos (3-42) and Tobey Castle (1-33), who between them dragged us back into a match that had threatened to run away.

Chasing 221, we stumbled to 1-1 almost before the tea urn had cooled, but Thomas Beeney's 44, with Tobey Castle (38) and Anthony Karassellos (31) either side of him, steadied things beautifully. Jordan Austin, Junaid Mufti and Nick Tromp all made the sorrowful walk for nought, and a horror show of a 39th over, costing us two wickets, threatened to hand it back to the visitors at the death.

Somehow, gloriously, we scrambled home 222/9 with a single wicket to spare. Two points, thoroughly earned, and a reminder that this club specialises in doing things the hard way — and getting there all the same.

Sat 27 May 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Gravesend CC · AwayformWWLLD

Away at Gravesend, and for once the sun remembered it was meant to be summer. Winning the toss and putting ourselves in the field first felt like a bold move, and for a while it looked a shrewd one, before Anish Patel decided he rather fancied batting all afternoon, cruising past his fifty to finish on 55, with Vishnu Vyakarnam (42) and Madhusudhan Mali (26) offering sturdy support. They closed on 201/9 from their forty overs — a total that had "tricky chase" written all over it. Credit where due: Tim Thirkell was superb, ripping through with 3-30, while Nolan Wilde (2-25) and Sam King (2-30) kept the pressure on throughout. A quiet word too on the milestones — those three wickets shuffled Tim past Matthew Carter into 9th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list, which is the sort of thing that ought to come with a small round of applause and a warm pint.

Chasing 202, we never quite found the fluency to make it a serious contest, subsiding to 143/9 from our forty. Nick Tromp battled to 33, Craig Sands chipped in with 31, and I added 22 of my own down the order. Less happily, the Duck Club ledger swelled by two, with Glen Rawson and Darrell Houghton-Judge both walking back for nought.

A draw, then — honours shared, neither side quite able to land the killer blow. Frustrating for the bowlers, who thoroughly deserved better from us with the bat, but there are worse ways to spend a Saturday than a sunny stalemate at Gravesend.

Sat 27 May 2023 🧢 1st XIv Offham CC · HomeformLDDDD

Tobey Castle here, and what a Saturday it turned out to be. Offham CC rolled up on a pleasant, grey afternoon that gave nothing away about what was to come — I won the toss, elected to bat, and for once nobody in the pavilion questioned the decision.

Our openers set the tone with 116 for the first wicket before anyone troubled the scorers with a dismissal, and from there the innings simply kept climbing. Toby Hughes played the innings of the season, a magnificent 115, while Alex Keeler's brisk 62 and a match-defining 147-run fourth-wicket stand took us into serious territory. I chipped in with a few runs of my own along the way, for what little that's worth alongside Hughes's heroics, and Mark Christmas saw us home unbeaten on 53 as we closed on a formidable 310 for 4.

Defending that sort of total should be the easy part, and it very nearly wasn't. Neil Scott and Tom Evans put together a stubborn 122-run stand for the third wicket, Scott falling just shy of a hundred on 94 and Evans not far behind on 88, and for a good while the outfield held its breath. Thankfully Anthony Karassellos proved the difference, tearing through with 3 for 56, with useful support from Mardey Castle and Martin Harris to peg Offham back to 288 for 7.

A twenty-two run win, then — tighter on the scoreboard than it felt in the field. Tea was well earned, and so, I'd argue, was the scoreline. Onwards.

Sun 21 May 2023 🧢 Sunday NVKCv Leeds & Broomfield CC · HomeformWWLWW

Sunday the 21st brought us Leeds & Broomfield at home, under skies that couldn't decide between sunshine and drizzle — rather like our form this season. I lost the toss, was asked to bowl, and spent the afternoon watching Max Aitken bat as though the drizzle didn't apply to him, cruising to 88 not out. Monte McCague chipped in with 47 and James Nurden an unbeaten 24 as they racked up 187/5 from their forty overs. Credit where due, though: Mark Christmas was superb, 3-32 and, we're delighted to report, his 600th career wicket in the process — a mark that also nudges him past Martin Harris into 12th on the club's all-time list. Harris himself (1-29) and Alex Keeler (1-30, two miserly maidens) kept things tight enough that 187 felt gettable.

It wasn't. Our reply folded to 82 all out in 26.2 overs, a collapse of such comprehensive misery that three of the lads — Jordan Austin, George Taylor and Anthony Karassellos — made the walk of shame for nought apiece. I managed 32 to at least give the scorebook something to look at, with Henry Bourdillon's 20 the only other real resistance; Bourdillon, at least, can console himself with top spot in the 2023 Sunday run charts on 112, while Christmas sits second among the season's wicket-takers.

A hundred and five runs is not a defeat you dress up. Not our day, chaps — back to the nets, and perhaps a look at what drizzle does to a cricket ball's swing.

Sun 21 May 2023 🧢 Friendly XIv CK Cobham CC, Kent · AwayformWLWWL

Skipper's Log — Sunday 21 May 2023, away at Cobham CC.

We lost the toss, were put in to field first, and duly went about our business under a cloudy Kent sky that felt entirely appropriate for the cricket that followed. Batting first, we crawled and occasionally sprinted to 171/9 from our forty overs, a total that owed most of its respectability to Luke Welsman's watchful 41, with Alex Wade chipping in a handy 32 and yours truly adding 26 to the cause. Special mention, as tradition demands, to poor Toby Joseph, who contrived to be back in the pavilion without troubling the scorers — a golden duck to file alongside the rest of this season's waterfowl.

Defending 171 was always going to require early wickets and a slice of luck, and while Alex Holt did his bit up front with 1-29, and Thomas Beeney chipped in with 1-48, luck rather stubbornly declined to show up. Jonathan Niranjan settled in for an unbeaten 74 and simply refused to leave, ably assisted by Aftab Hassan's equally immovable 58 not out, and between them they walked Cobham home with overs and wickets to spare — 172/2 off 27, eight wickets in hand.

So: beaten, fairly and squarely, by a side who batted like they had somewhere better to be and got there early. Not our finest afternoon in the field, but Welsman's runs and Beeney's solitary wicket at least keep the season charts ticking over. Back to the nets, and better luck next Sunday.

Sat 20 May 2023 🧢 1st XIv AC Ash CC · AwayformLLDDD

From the captain's chair — Saturday 20 May 2023. The road took us to Ash CC, and a pleasant, cloudy afternoon greeted us for what would prove a rather even old scrap.

Put into the field first, we watched Ash rack up 210 all out from their 45 overs, Richard Ewart the chief architect with 40, well backed by Charlie Laslett's 38 and Tom Laslett's 26. Credit to the lads with the ball though — Fred Taylor led from the front with 3-53, Anthony Karassellos and Mark Christmas chipped in with two apiece, and Alex Keeler bowled two tidy maidens for good measure. Tim Dudgeon, for his part, departed for a golden duck, which is always a small mercy for the fielding side.

Our reply, sadly, never got out of second gear. We were bowled out for 94 in 29.5 overs, a chase that felt over almost before it began. Jordan Austin held things together with a battling 25, but Fred Taylor and Anthony Karassellos both fell for nought, and I have to confess I joined them — out myself without troubling the scorers. We shall draw a veil over that particular effort.

There was a proper silver lining, mind: Jordan brought up 6,000 career runs for the club, a landmark worth far more than any single afternoon's batting.

A draw, then, honours shared, and on the day probably a fair reflection — we bowled like a side worth its salt, batted like one still finding its feet.

Sun 14 May 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv HC Harbledown CC · AwayformLLLLW

Bit of a heartbreaker at Harbledown on a grey but pleasant Sunday, and I'll confess putting them in after winning the toss looked a shrewd move for about four hours. Richard Piper played the anchor role beautifully for his fifty, well backed up by Will Thew's 31, and 146/8 from our forty overs felt like a total we could defend on a sluggish afternoon like this. As it turned out, we very nearly did.

Ian Hollingworth was magnificent with the ball, 3-28 and full value for it, with Tim Thirkell (2-26) and Frank Harbord (1-12) chipping in nicely, and poor Huzaifa Zubair never got off the mark. But Theo Bawtree had other ideas, a well-made fifty of his own, ably assisted by Almas Khan's 26, and Harbledown squeaked home by two wickets with 3.3 overs to spare. Cricket has a cruel sense of humour sometimes.

Two moments lifted the gloom considerably: Richard Piper reached 18,000 career runs for the club, a staggering landmark by any measure, and Tim Thirkell brought up his 1000th appearance in Linton colours on the same afternoon — the sort of double celebration you can't script. Both men now lead our 2023 Sunday 2nd XI charts, Piper with 68 runs and Thirkell with 5 wickets, so the form is there even if the result wasn't.

Beaten by two wickets, then, but not disgraced. We'll dust ourselves down and come back stronger next week.

Sun 14 May 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv HC Harbledown CC · HomeformWWWLL

Sunday 14 May 2023, and Harbledown CC rolled up on a pleasant, grey afternoon to find us losing the toss and being sent out into the field first — never my favourite way to start a Sunday, but there we are.

Batting proved sticky work. We lost our first wicket for just 7, which is the sort of start that has a captain reaching for the biscuit tin, and though we rallied gamely we could only muster 123 all out in 39.4 overs. Nick Tromp led the way with a battling 30, but the rest of us rather let the innings drift away without ever quite finding fluency.

With 123 to defend we knew it would take something special, and for a while our bowlers gave it a real go. Mardey Castle was the pick of the attack with 2-31, backed up nicely by Luke Welsman (1-23) and Thomas Beeney (1-28). But Harbledown had other ideas, built around a superb unbeaten 53 from Josh Julian, well supported by Sudesh Thakur and Henry Roberts with 30 apiece — their fourth-wicket pair putting on a match-defining 77 — and they cantered home to 127-4 in 26.1 overs.

Six wickets the margin, and no arguing with it. Nick Tromp continues to lead our Sunday run charts and Thomas Beeney our wicket charts, so the engine room is ticking over nicely even if the chassis rattled a bit today. We'll be better for it next week.

Sat 13 May 2023 🧢 2nd XIv Gore Court CC · AwayformWWWLL

What a curious afternoon down at Gore Court. We won the toss, batted first in decent grey conditions, and set about building something substantial. Craig Sands played the innings of the day, unbeaten on 72, and I was glad to lend a hand with 34 while Aaron Hughes chipped in a tidy 29. Extras got in on the act too, contributing a generous 30 — the sort of total that has the opposition's opening bowlers muttering into their tea. All told we closed on 241 for 5 from our 40 overs, which felt like a platform worth defending.

And defend it we did, though not quite all the way home. Matthew Carter was magnificent with the ball, ripping through their order for 4 for 13, and in doing so climbed past Tim Thirkell into 9th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list — a nice bit of history on an otherwise damp Saturday. Nick Tromp (2-6) and Nolan Wilde (2-21) kept the pressure on from the other end, while Tim Thirkell bowled five miserly maidens for good measure. Paul Geary, Mark Garbett and Scott Upward all departed for ducks, and Gore Court were staring down the barrel at 51 for 9 — but somehow, agonisingly, they clung on.

A draw, then, when by rights we should have finished the job. Honours shared, pride largely intact, and Matthew Carter's name a little higher up the honours board than it was on Friday.

Sat 13 May 2023 🧢 1st XIv Gore Court CC · HomeformLLLDD

A cloudy Saturday, the ball swinging about, and Gore Court CC finding out the hard way why we bowl first when the covers have been damp. Thirteen all out from eleven overs — I've seen tea urns take longer to fill than that innings lasted. Alex Keeler was simply unplayable, tearing through them with six for five including two maidens for good measure, while Anthony Karassellos chipped in with three for seven at the other end, mopping up what little resistance remained. Matthew Roche, Alex Campbell and Majid Sialvi all trooped off for ducks, and by the time we'd finished with them their scorebook looked more like a losses column than an innings.

Chasing thirteen, we knocked it off in two and a half overs without losing a wicket — I'll confess my own contribution to proceedings was mercifully brief, more a formality than an innings, and none the worse for it. There's a particular flavour of anticlimax to winning the arithmetic so comprehensively that the match itself refuses to end, and so it proved: honours shared, a draw when neither side could quite force the other's hand, the sun presumably still working out what had hit it.

Elsewhere in the ledger, Henry Bourdillon continues to sit second in our run charts with 46 for the season, and Alex Keeler — as today rather emphatically demonstrated — leads the wickets column with eight. On the day itself: a rout with the ball, a formality with the bat, and a scoreline that flattered nobody but reflects nothing but credit on the bowling. We'll take it, cloud and all.

Sun 07 May 2023 🧢 Sunday NVKCv High Halstow CC · HomeformWWWLW

From the captain's chair — Sunday 07 May 2023, High Halstow CC at home, and a pleasantly drizzly afternoon for it.

Winning the toss and putting them in felt like the right call, and so it proved. High Halstow made 124 all out in 36.2 overs, largely on the back of a fine half-century from Andrew Maurice (54) — a knock that threatened to run away from us before Sam Boyns got to work. Three for 14, with three maidens thrown in for good measure, was bowling of real discipline, and he had willing support from Martin Harris (2-26) and, in a small personal highlight I'll allow myself to mention, one for 6 from yours truly. Not a run given away lightly, and 124 always looked a touch light on a day like this.

Chasing it down, we made harder work of the middle overs than the scoreboard perhaps suggests, but Henry Bourdillon's 49 was the innings that mattered, well backed up by Benjamin Austin's 37, and we got home at 125/4 in 20.2 overs with something to spare.

Worth a mention in dispatches: Martin Harris's brace nudged him past Mark Christmas into 12th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list — the sort of quiet milestone that makes the tea taste better. Two points, thoroughly earned, and a six-wicket win to send everyone home smiling despite the drizzle.

Sun 07 May 2023 🧢 Sunday 2nd XIv Holborough Anchorians CC · HomeformLLLLL

Sunday 7th May 2023, and Linton Park welcomed Holborough Anchorians to the club for a drizzly but agreeable afternoon's cricket. I won the toss and had no hesitation in taking first strike — the outfield looked lively enough to reward runs on the board, and for once my judgement wasn't found wanting.

We laboured a touch to 118/9 from our 40 overs, never quite cutting loose, but I was in no mood to depart, carrying my bat to an unbeaten 52 that anchored the innings nicely. Junaid Mufti chipped in with a tidy 20 to keep the scoreboard ticking, while poor Frank Harbord will want this one struck from the record — a golden duck to file alongside the club's finest collection of blushes.

Defending 118 against a decent Anchorians outfit felt like a tall order on paper, but the ball did the talking. Tim Thirkell was magnificent, 3-18 and probing all afternoon, and I allowed myself a quiet grin taking 3-33 with the ball to go with the runs earlier — greedy, perhaps, but nobody complained. Srikrishna Challa bowled with real discipline, 2-12 including five maidens, barely offering a run away, and had Tim Thirkell and Muzzy Rawfy back in the hutch without scoring. Holborough were bowled out for 110 from 39 overs, and we'd sneaked home by 8 runs.

A word too for Tim Thirkell, who climbed past John Ames into 9th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list — a fine achievement on a fine day. A scrappy, hard-earned win, and I'll take those all season long.

Sun 07 May 2023 🧢 Sunday 1st XIv Borstal CC · AwayformWWWWL

A pleasant, drizzly afternoon at Borstal, and the sort of match that reminds you why you keep the kit bag by the door even in May. Put in first, we toiled through 39.5 overs as David Round settled in for a well-made 98, with Sam Pepper chipping in 44 to help the total along to 220 all out. Small mercies came our way too, mind — James Tingley departed for a golden duck, one bright spark in an otherwise long afternoon in the field. I was fortunate enough to find some rhythm with the ball, finishing with 4-42, and had excellent company in Richard Knowler (3-33) and Nick Tromp (2-38), the three of us doing most of the damage between us.

Chasing 220 was always going to ask questions of the top order, and we never quite found the answers, bundled out for 82 in 36.4 overs. John Karassellos will not thank me for mentioning his golden duck, but the Duck Club ledger waits for no man. I managed a steadying-ish 17 before joining the queue back to the pavilion myself.

Little consolation in leading the club's run and wicket charts for the season when the scoreboard reads as it does, but there it is. A chastening day out on the road, well beaten by the better side. We dust ourselves down, we go again.

Sat 06 May 2023 🧢 1st XIv BC Broadstairs CC · AwayformLLLLD

Onwards to Broadstairs on a Saturday that promised sunshine and delivered rain, because of course it did. We lost the toss, were duly invited to bat in the wet, and somehow the lads batted as though the covers had never come off. I settled in and simply couldn't get off strike — or rather, wouldn't, ending unbeaten in the nineties before finally raising three figures for 101, my first hundred in some time and a thoroughly satisfying way to spend a soggy afternoon. Henry Bourdillon chipped in nicely with 38 and Mark Christmas with 29, and 249/6 from our 45 overs felt like a total we could defend even before a ball was bowled in anger.

And defend it we did, emphatically. Broadstairs never really got going — Thomas Izzard and Joshua Amos both departed without troubling the scorers, and from there it was a procession. Martin Harris was magnificent, ripping through with 4-35 and, in doing so, easing past Terry Whittaker into 13th on the club's all-time wicket-takers list — a lovely personal milestone on a fine team day. Anthony Karassellos (3-16) and a typically miserly Alex Keeler (2-18, with two maidens for good measure) mopped up the rest, leaving Broadstairs bowled out for 129 in 35.2 overs. Clayton Charles's 38, backed by Mark Robey's 33 and Ben Allinson's 32, was the only real resistance.

A win by 120 runs, then, and a highly satisfactory one at that. Onwards.

Sun 30 Apr 2023 🧢 Sunday NVKCv Offham CC · HomeformLWWWL

Sunday 30 April brought Offham CC to Linton Park under a kindly overcast sky, and having won the toss I sent them in — always a bold call when you're the one who then has to stand in the field explaining it. They ground their way to 96/7 from their forty overs, Neil Willis top-scoring with a watchful 37 while the rest came and, in poor Harry Legg's case, went for a duck. Anthony Karassellos was the pick of the attack with 2-17, Alex Keeler bowled with wonderful economy for 1-3 and five maidens — the sort of spell that makes the rest of us look positively reckless by comparison — and I chipped in with 1-9, which I shall mention here once and never again, tempting as it is.

Chasing 97, we made light work of it. Benjamin Austin cruised to an unbeaten 50, ably supported by Henry Bourdillon's composed 43 not out, and we cantered home at 98/0 in just 14.3 overs without so much as troubling our lower order — who, frankly, barely had time to pad up.

There was a wonderful footnote to the afternoon too: Thomas Beeney brought up 500 career wickets, a landmark that puts the rest of our efforts rather in the shade and deserved every ounce of the applause it got.

A fine win, comfortably achieved, with individual milestones to toast on both counts. Onwards.

Sat 29 Apr 2023 🧢 2nd XIv DC Detling CC · AwayformWWWWL

Saturday 29 April 2023 saw us make the trip out to Detling CC, and if I'm honest, it's not a fixture I'll be framing for the clubhouse wall. On a pleasant, clear afternoon that gave absolutely no excuses, we shuffled to 64 all out from 31 overs — a total that flattered no one. David T Lowen and I both contributed ducks to the ledger, and while I'd love to tell you mine was a good one, there's no such thing. The less said the better.

Defending 64 was always going to ask a lot of the lads, but credit where it's due — we didn't go quietly. Sam King was superb with the ball, tearing through their order for 3-18, Inus Joubert chipped in with 1-11, and Ian Hollingworth bowled beautifully tight, sending down three maidens. Between us we even had Gary Knope and Matthew Noakes back in the pavilion without troubling the scorers. But Matt Browse had other ideas, batting sensibly for an unbeaten 35, and Detling eased home at 65/4 with overs to spare, closing it out in 16.5.

A defeat, then, but not a disgraceful one — the bowling unit did everything asked of it and more; it was the bat that let us down. Aaron Hughes tops our 2nd XI run charts this season with 12, and Sam King leads the wickets with 3, so the shoots of promise are there. We live to fight another Saturday.