🦆 The Duck Pond

The season is drawing to a close but the exclusive zero club shows no sign of adjourning for winter. Four fresh inductions across the weekend's two fixtures, and the art of not scoring is alive and well at Linton Park. Saturday 28 September — 1st XI vs A. Trembeth's XI (h) - Ray Howard, in at six, was bowled by A- Trembeth for his 2nd duck of the season and 4th of a growing career collection in 37 innings — 58th in the all-time roost. Splendidly, on this very date back in 1952, Ray Tippen (1949–1955) also strolled back for nought in this same fixture, one of four ducks in a career that itself ended, fittingly, on a duck — a Retirement Duck club man through and through. - John --'s Taylor followed at eight, caught Steadman off C- Rye, for his 1st of the season but a weighty 13th of a career now standing at 133 innings — a lofty 6th in the all-time table, the sort of company reserved for the true stalwarts of failure. He keeps Ray Howard's memory of Ray Tippen fresh, sharing the very same on-this-day echo from 1952. Sunday 29 September — Married vs Linton Park CC (h) - Stan Wratten, at three, was caught Frank Wright bowled John Ames — his 1st duck of the season, 11th of his career in 146 innings, 12th all-time. Stan carries the honour of "Quacking Together" with John Ames on the board, though today Ames did the bowling rather than the joining — a rematch for another day. On this day in 1956, Frank Brattle (1937–1957) also fell, against A. Snell XI, one of five in a long and varied career. - C- Haylor, last man in, was bowled Clive Smith — his 4th duck of the season already, and 9th of his career from a mere 23 innings, a startling strike rate for the wrong kind of record. A paid-up Retirement Duck club member from a past farewell, Haylor shares Stan's on-this-day nod to Frank Brattle's 1956 nought. Week in summary Two matches, four ducks, no pairs and no family affairs this time round — though with C- Haylor's rate of return, a family gathering on the honours board can surely only be a matter of time. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🏏🍩 1. Cliff Anscombe — 4 ducks, 5 innings, 80.0% 2. C- Haylor — 4 ducks, 7 innings, 57.14% 3. William Buck — 4 ducks, 13 innings, 30.77% 4. John Abnett — 3 ducks, 4 innings, 75.0% 5. Bob Arnold — 3 ducks, 14 innings, 21.43% The chase for Duck of the Year is finely poised, and with fixtures still to come there's ample time for someone to make their mark — or rather, fail to. See you at the next match, where the zero club stands ready to welcome its newest members. 0️⃣🦆

Two fixtures, six ducks, and one bowler having the time of his life. Saturday 21st — 1st XI v Bearsted CC (h) Richard Harris was run out for nought at 9, no fault of the bat. His 1st duck of the season is his 27th career quack from 143 innings, which plants him 2nd on the all-time leaderboard of 698. A colossus of the crease-less arts. Sunday 22nd — 1st XI v Tilling Steven (h) Tilling Steven's R- Bailey bowled himself into Linton folklore, accounting for FIVE Duck Club members in a single innings — a proper five-for of the naught variety. William Buck (b Bailey, 3) fell for his 4th of the season and 10th career duck, 15th all-time, and a paid-up member of the Quacking Together honours alongside John Thirkell. C- Haylor (b Bailey, 8) added his 3rd of the season and 8th career duck, a Retirement Duck club veteran from a past farewell who is very much still turning out. Cliff Anscombe (b Bailey, 9) took his 4th of the season from just 5 career innings, an 80% strike rate that keeps him atop this year's own Duck of the Year 1957 standings. John Abnett (b Bailey, 10) notched his 3rd of the season and 8th career duck, proud holder of Ducks in a Row (4 consecutive) — consistency of a very particular kind. Alan Wilkes (c Mills b Bailey, 11) closed the innings with his 2nd of the season and 7th career duck, a double member of Only Two Quacks, alongside both Bob Arnold and John Ames. On this very day in 1951, John --'s Taylor also made a duck, against Hunton Wanderers CC — Buck, Haylor, Anscombe, Abnett and Wilkes all keep that anniversary company this weekend. Week in Summary 6 ducks from 2 matches, five of them to one bowler in one innings. The art of not scoring, thoroughly demonstrated. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 1. Cliff Anscombe — 5 inns, 4 ducks (80%) 2. William Buck — 12 inns, 4 ducks (33%) 3. John Abnett — 4 inns, 3 ducks (75%) 4. C- Haylor — 6 inns, 3 ducks (50%) 5. Bob Arnold — 14 inns, 3 ducks (21%) Next fixture beckons, and the ducks never take a week off. See you at the crease 🏏0️⃣

Two fixtures took the field this weekend and the ducks, it must be said, made themselves scarce — only one nought worth its place on the record. Quality over quantity, apparently. Saturday 14 September 1st XI v Bowaters CC (home) Batting at four, Bob Arnold was undone by a sharp take from Frank Hallard off the bowling of Harry Jeffery — the 3rd duck of his season and the 22nd of a long and thoroughly decorated Linton career, now spanning 108 innings. That tally holds him at 3rd on the all-time list of 698, a position few will ever trouble. Bob remains a fixture of several of the club's more exclusive sub-societies: Ducks in a Row (four in a row, a monument to sustained futility), Only Two Quacks (with Alan Wilkes), and Quacking Together (with John Thirkell) — proof, if any were needed, that misery loves company in the Duck Club as much as anywhere else. 🍩 Sunday 15 September The second fixture of the period passed off entirely fowl-free — all eleven batters got off the mark, and the honours board gathers no new names today. Week in summary One duck from two matches this period — a quiet weekend by Duck Club standards, but Bob Arnold made sure the noughts column wasn't left empty. 0️⃣ Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🏏 🥇 Cliff Anscombe — 3 ducks in 4 innings (75%) 🥈 William Buck — 3 ducks in 11 innings (27.27%) 🥉 Bob Arnold — 3 ducks in 14 innings (21.43%) - John Abnett — 2 ducks in 3 innings (66.67%) - C- Haylor — 2 ducks in 5 innings (40%) With the season running into its closing weeks, Cliff Anscombe sits proudly atop the perch on a startling 75% strike rate — but there's plenty of cricket left for the chasing pack to have their say. Bats up next weekend, ducks welcome. 🦆🥇

Two fixtures, four ducks, and Linton's 1957 vintage doing its level best to keep the tradition alive as the season heads for the finish line. Saturday 7th — 1st XI away at Tovil Frank Brattle became the weekend's opening casualty, bowled by a-S- Epsley at first wicket down. It's his 1st duck of the summer and 5th for the Club from 35 innings, tying him at 36th all-time with Allan Peach, who reached the same tally in a far briefer stay at the crease between 1903 and 1907. The family name runs deep in these parts too — his parent-child kin Percy Brattle carries 4 career ducks of his own. Sunday 8th — 1st XI host Anchorians CC A far more generous helping at home, with three names added to the tally. Tony Levick opened the procession, bowled by B Mitchell for his 1st duck of the season and 5th of his career from a mighty 104 innings — a fine defensive record breached just the once more. Neatly, on this very date back in 1945, Stan Wratten also walked back without scoring, against the 8th Sherwood Foresters — Stan went on to 10 career ducks and a place on the Quacking Together board alongside John Ames. Cliff Anscombe followed, bowled by Don Wykes, and the numbers are becoming a habit — his 3rd duck of the season from just 4 innings, a startling 75% strike rate for nought. A paid-up member of the Debutante Duck club since his very first knock, Cliff also currently holds Duck of the Year 1957, and on this evidence he's not relinquishing it lightly. He too shares today's date in history with Stan Wratten's 1945 blank. John Abnett rounded things off, bowled by H Turner, for his 2nd duck of the season and 7th career quack from 21 innings — good enough to keep his name on the Ducks in a Row board for four in succession. Like his teammates, John shares the date with Stan Wratten's own 1945 nought. Week in Summary Four ducks from two matches, every one of them bowled, and three of the four falling in a single Anchorians innings — the kind of top-order collapse that makes the Duck Club's job easy and the scorebook's job miserable. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Cliff Anscombe — 3 ducks / 4 innings (75%) 2. William Buck — 3 ducks / 10 innings (30%) 3. John Abnett — 2 ducks / 3 innings (66.67%) 4. C- Haylor — 2 ducks / 5 innings (40%) 5. Tony Snell — 2 ducks / 7 innings (28.57%) Cliff sits handsomely atop the pile, though with plenty of season left there's every chance a fresh name muscles in before it's done. 🦆 Until next weekend — bat well, or at least fall with style. 🍩0️⃣

A quiet weekend by Duck Club standards, but the exclusive zero club still found exactly one new inductee to process, so the honours board was not idle. 🏏 Saturday, Hunton Wanderers CC (away) The 1st XI's solitary contribution came at number ten, where Michael Morton departed c J Foley b J Ludden — a tidy dismissal, precisely the sort that makes the scorebook look busier than the batting did. It's his 1st duck of the 1957 season and his 11th for the club overall, keeping him lodged at a very respectable 10th of 696 in the all-time table — rarefied air, even if the view from there is entirely nought-shaped. Michael already has 1956's Duck of the Year rosette tucked away, so this one arrives as a returning champion reminding the field he hasn't gone soft. And by happy coincidence of the calendar, on this very day in 1952 the legendary John Thirkell — Linton's all-time number one with 37 career ducks, playing from 1943 to 1957 — also strolled back for nought, against A Levick XI. Some traditions are simply observed on schedule. 📋 Week in Summary Two fixtures, one duck. The other ten Linton batters on Saturday apparently forgot to bring their sense of occasion, and Sunday passed entirely without incident — a rare and faintly suspicious display of competence across the club. The art of not scoring took the weekend off; normal service, we trust, resumes shortly. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - William Buck — 10 innings, 3 ducks (30%) - Cliff Anscombe — 3 innings, 2 ducks (66.67%) - C- Haylor — 5 innings, 2 ducks (40%) - Tony Snell — 7 innings, 2 ducks (28.57%) - Bob Arnold — 12 innings, 2 ducks (16.67%) Cliff Anscombe's strike rate for failure remains the number to beat, though the whole top five is bunched close enough that next weekend could easily reshuffle the podium.

A rare and faintly disappointing entry in the club's long history — two fixtures took the field this weekend, twenty-two-odd LPCC batsmen strode out with bat in hand, and not a single one of them managed to get themselves out for nought. The exclusive zero club, so reliably busy most weekends, sat entirely idle. No new members, no fresh additions to anyone's tally, nothing but runs on the board from start to finish. Frankly, it's the sort of weekend that gives triumph through adversity a bad name — adversity requires someone to actually fail, and this lot simply declined to co-operate. Somewhere the ghosts of Ducks past are shaking their heads. Still, the art of not scoring is a fickle mistress, and she rarely stays away for long. The season's front-runners remain very much in the hunt, and with the summer drawing on there's plenty of cricket left for someone to put their name back in lights — or rather, in noughts. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 1. William Buck — 3 ducks from 9 innings (33.33%) 2. Cliff Anscombe — 2 ducks from 2 innings (100.00%) 🍩 a flawless record, for better or worse 3. C- Haylor — 2 ducks from 5 innings (40.00%) 4. Tony Snell — 2 ducks from 6 innings (33.33%) 5. Bob Arnold — 2 ducks from 11 innings (18.18%) Cliff Anscombe's perfect record deserves a special mention — two innings, two ducks, not a run to his name all season. Consistency of a very particular kind. A quiet weekend, then, but never fear — the next fixtures are on the horizon, and the Duck Club's doors never stay closed for long. Get your bat pads on, gentlemen, someone has to keep the honours board ticking over. 🦆 0️⃣ 🏏

A modest but historically resonant weekend for the exclusive zero club, with just two ducks recorded across the two fixtures — both, fittingly, from the 1st XI. 🏏 Saturday 17th — Bowaters CC (away) John Thirkell continued his season of dubious distinction, caught John Woollett off the bowling of Eric Wilson at number two. It's his 2nd duck of the summer and a remarkable 37th of an extraordinary career, a tally that keeps him perched at the very summit of the all-time honours board — 1st of 696 duckers in club history. A three-time Duck of the Year (1952, 1954 and 1955), John also sits proudly in the Lone Duck and Homebody Duck top tens, having mastered the art of not scoring whether on the road or at home. He even carries Quacking Together billing alongside both Bob Arnold and William Buck, though neither joined him at the crease this week. On this very day in 1881, Jack Fryer was doing much the same for the club against 1st Innings Leeds Nil Desperandum. Fryer went on to 12 career ducks and a couple of Duck of the Year titles himself (1891, 1900) — proof, if any were needed, that the zero club has always kept a full membership book. 🥇 Sunday 18th — Mote A (home) C- Haylor departed for nought at number eight, bowled by C- Horton. It's his 2nd duck of the season and 7th of his career from just 20 innings, enough to see him sit 24th on the all-time list. Haylor is also a long-standing member of the Retirement Duck club, having bowed out on a duck at some point in a career gone by — though happily there's no suggestion he's going anywhere just yet. His parallel needs no trip back to the 1800s — on this very day in 1956, none other than John Thirkell (see above) was also dismissed for nought against Bowaters CC. The Duck Club, it seems, keeps things in the family even when the family isn't related. 📊 Week in Summary Two matches, two ducks, both courtesy of the 1st XI — a quiet weekend by the club's usual standards, but with John Thirkell extending his reign at the top of the all-time charts, quality has more than compensated for quantity. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🍩 1. William Buck — 3 ducks, 9 innings (33%) 2. Cliff Anscombe — 2 ducks, 2 innings (100%) 3. C- Haylor — 2 ducks, 4 innings (50%) 4. Tony Snell — 2 ducks, 5 innings (40%) 5. Bob Arnold — 2 ducks, 9 innings (22%) Special mention to Cliff Anscombe, whose two innings have yielded two ducks and not a single run — consistency of a very particular kind. Onwards to the next fixture, where the honours board waits, as ever, with open arms. 🦆🏏0️⃣

A rare and troubling weekend at Linton Park: two matches played, twenty-two innings on offer, and not a single one surrendered for nought. The ducks, it seems, took the weekend off. For an institution built on the noble art of not scoring, this is nothing short of scandalous. Every batsman who walked out across both fixtures found runs — however few, however unconvincing — and trudged back with at least one to his name. The exclusive zero club held no induction ceremony this week. No golden ducks, no pairs, no family affairs to report. A place of dubious distinction briefly found itself with nothing to distinguish. We can only assume the bowlers were off form, the fielders generous, or the ducks themselves simply lying low, gathering strength for the weekend ahead. Rest assured, membership renewal is only ever one poor shot away. 0️⃣ Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 🏏 - 🥇 William Buck — 3 ducks from 8 innings, a commanding 37.5%. The season's clear pace-setter, and a batsman clearly more comfortable walking off than staying in. - 🥈 Cliff Anscombe — 2 ducks from just 2 innings, a flawless 100%. Consistency of a very particular kind: every visit to the crease has ended the same way. - 🥉 Tony Snell — 2 ducks from 5 innings, 40%. A man discovering the art of not scoring at a healthy clip. - Bob Arnold — 2 ducks from 9 innings, 22.22%. Steady contributions to the cause. - Roy Clarke — 2 ducks from 11 innings, 18.18%. Proof that even the patient can be claimed. 🍩 A quiet week for the club, but never fear — 1957's Duck of the Year race remains wide open, and with matches still to come this season, triumph through adversity is surely just around the corner for someone. See you next weekend, when normal service — that is to say, abnormal batting — will no doubt resume. 🦆

Two fixtures, one two-innings marathon, and the exclusive zero club gained no fewer than seven new subscriptions this week. The art of not scoring was practised with real dedication at Linton Park. 🏏 Saturday, Aylesford Paper Mills CC (away) William Buck got the weekend's proceedings under way, bowled by D Mason without so much as a squeak off the bat. It's his 1st duck of the season and 7th of his career, keeping him handsomely placed at 18th of 695 in the all-time roll of dishonour — grand company he shares with clubman John Thirkell on the "Quacking Together" board, Thirkell himself very much not present in this week's casualty list. On this very date in 1952, a young Gordon Fenner (1941–1957) was performing the identical ceremony, en route to 14 career ducks and 5th place in the all-time standings. Buck, alas, was only warming up. 🎉 Monday, Hon F Cornwallis (home, two innings) The Bank Holiday two-inningser proved a positively bountiful harvest. First dig: Buck again, this time bowled by K Goodwin — his 2nd of the season, 8th of his career. D- Jordan followed, bowled Gladdish, his 2nd duck of the season and 2nd of his young career from just 12 innings. Frank Wright went the same way to Gladdish, his 5th career duck — a paid-up member of the Debutante Duck, Quack-to-Quack, and Retirement Duck boards from earlier chapters of his story, though happily still very much an active batsman today. Tony Snell rounded off the innings caught off Gladdish's bowling — three scalps in one spell for the bowler — his 2nd duck of the season and 8th of his career, and a name on the "Ducks in a Row" board for a past run of four on the bounce. Remarkably, all four found themselves keeping historical company with Ernest Cruttenden, who ducked on this exact date in 1895 against Rochester CC. Second dig, and Buck simply couldn't resist a third helping — caught off R Leschallas's bowling for his 3rd duck of the season and 9th career blob, a genuine hat-trick of nought across the two fixtures. J Lea also fell, bowled J Smith, opening his personal account with his 1st ever duck from just 4 innings — and, fittingly, joining Cruttenden's 1895 party as well. 📋 Week in Summary Seven ducks from two fixtures — a spread nicely dominated by the Cornwallis bowling attack, with Gladdish alone accounting for three victims in a single innings. William Buck's triple across the weekend is the standout feat, the sort of consistency the club exists to celebrate. Triumph through adversity, indeed. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. William Buck — 3 ducks / 7 innings (42.86%) 2. Cliff Anscombe — 2 ducks / 2 innings (100%) 3. Tony Snell — 2 ducks / 5 innings (40%) 4. Bob Arnold — 2 ducks / 9 innings (22.22%) 5. Roy Clarke — 2 ducks / 11 innings (18.18%) Buck now sits alone at the head of the Duck of the Year race, though Anscombe's flawless record keeps the pressure on. 0️⃣🍩 Next fixture looms, and the exclusive zero club always has room for new members. Bring your bats, gentlemen — or don't bother.

Two matches this weekend, three ducks laid, and every single one of them hatched in the same innings against Folkestone CC. When the rot sets in at Folkestone, it apparently sets in as a job lot. 1st XI — away at Folkestone CC D- Jordan went first, bowled by Jim Gordon at number seven for nought. A maiden entry in every sense — his first duck of the season and the very first of his career, 1 from 9 innings, landing him 179th of 695 in the all-time table. Plenty of company to be found there yet. C- Haylor followed at number nine, lbw to John Spanswick, his first duck of the campaign and sixth for the club from 19 innings — a lofty 25th in the all-time standings for a man who bats down the order. Haylor is also a long-serving name on the Retirement Duck honours board, having bowed out on a duck at some point in his career — no cause for alarm today, merely a past farewell on the record. Alan Wilkes completed the set at number eleven, caught by Spanswick off Gordon's bowling — Gordon's second scalp of the innings, greedy work from the seamer. It's Wilkes's first duck of the season and sixth of his career from 29 knocks, 24th all-time, and he already holds a reserved page in the honours ledger under Only Two Quacks, alongside both Bob Arnold and John Ames. A neat little tail-end collapse for the 1sts then — 7, 9 and 11 all back in the hutch without scoring, and Jim Gordon can claim a hand in two of the three dismissals. Curiously, this very date in 1897 also saw Ernest Cruttenden make a duck of his own, against Brenchley CC — meaning all three of today's ducks share their exact calendar anniversary with a correspondent 60 years their senior. The 27th, meanwhile, passed entirely duck-free — Folkestone did all the damage on the 28th alone. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🏆 - Cliff Anscombe — 2 ducks / 2 innings (100%) - Bob Arnold — 2 ducks / 9 innings (22%) - Roy Clarke — 2 ducks / 9 innings (22%) - E- Ambros — 1 duck / 1 innings (100%) - John Abnett — 1 duck / 1 innings (100%) Cliff Anscombe sits proudly atop the table on a flawless strike rate — not troubled the scorer yet this season. Bats out, pads on, ducks ready for next weekend's fixtures 🦆🏏0️⃣

A quiet weekend on the Linton Park scorebook, but where there's a First XI, there's always at least one nought waiting patiently in the long grass. 🏏 1st XI — Two Falls to John Larkings John Waters got things underway, caught by M- Harden off the bowling of P- Bennett without troubling the scorers. It's his 2nd career duck from 10 innings, and his 1st of the 1957 season — a tidy addition to a career that's still finding its feet in the exclusive zero club. Fittingly, on this very day back in 1897, H G Smith was performing the identical ceremony against Maidstone CC, so John keeps good historical company as he departs. A day later, same opposition, Ray Howard followed suit — caught G- Clarke, bowled D- Goodliffe, also without scoring. That's Ray's 3rd career duck from 32 innings and his 1st of the season, sliding him in at 79th of 695 in the all-time table of dubious distinction. And wouldn't you know it — also on this day in 1897, H G Smith was again out for nought, this time the very same fixture as John's parallel above. A proper vintage year for Maidstone-induced ignominy, it seems. Neither man faced a golden duck — both got bat on ball before the inevitable arrived, which by Duck Club standards counts as a moral victory of sorts. 📋 Week in Summary Two matches, two ducks, both from the 1st XI, both against John Larkings, both wrapped up in catches rather than anything more dramatic. No pairs, no families, no king ducks this week — the Duck Club's rarer honours stayed safely on the shelf. Just the reliable, unglamorous business of two batsmen walking off for nothing, exactly as the club's honours board has been recording since the 1860s. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Cliff Anscombe — 2 innings, 2 ducks (100%) 2. Roy Clarke — 8 innings, 2 ducks (25%) 3. Bob Arnold — 9 innings, 2 ducks (22.22%) 4. E- Ambros — 1 innings, 1 duck (100%) 5. John Abnett — 1 innings, 1 duck (100%) Cliff Anscombe sits imperiously atop the table on a perfect record — the art of not scoring, perfected twice out of twice. 🍩 The season rolls on, and with it the ever-present promise that somewhere, someone's next innings ends before it properly begins. See you all at the next fixture — the ducks certainly will be.

A quiet weekend for the parish's most exclusive club by numbers, but no less eventful for it — two names added to the ledger, one of them a fully paid-up member on his very first appearance. 🏏 Saturday 13th — 1st XI v A. Trembeths (h) Batting at first drop, John Thirkell fell early, bowled by A. Trembeth, for his 36th career duck from 228 innings — his first blob of the 1957 campaign. Remarkably that tally still sits him top of Linton's all-time duck standings, a table 694 names deep, a perch he has occupied through Duck of the Year honours in 1952, 1954 and 1955, and reinforced with places in the Ducks on the Road, Homebody Duck and Lone Duck top tens. He also carries a double Quacking Together entry, having shared a paired duck apiece with both Bob Arnold and William Buck down the years — fitting, given Arnold himself features handily in this season's chase below. Curiously, on this very date back in 1940, one Ernie Chiesman was suffering an identical fate against Loose CC — the second duck of his own eventual pair, seventeen years to the day. In at first drop's neighbour, N- Gibson-Watt continued the damage, caught M. Beacon bowled A. Trembeth without troubling the scorers — and doing so on his very first outing in a Linton shirt. A genuine, ink-still-wet Debutante Duck, and — for the moment — sole occupant of the One and Done club for 1957, a career built on exactly one innings and exactly one duck. Whether that stands is a tale for future weeks. He slots straight in at 256th of 694 in the all-time reckoning, and shares with John the odd distinction of ducking on the same calendar date Ernie Chiesman once did against Loose CC in 1940 — a rather crowded anniversary for Linton's unluckier batsmen. Week in Summary Two matches, two ducks, both falling to the same hard-working A. Trembeth on the same Saturday afternoon — misery, and bowling figures, loving company. No pairs, no family affairs and no king ducks to report this time, just honest toil from the visiting attack. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Cliff Anscombe — 2 ducks from 2 innings (100%) - Roy Clarke — 2 ducks from 7 innings (28.57%) - Bob Arnold — 2 ducks from 9 innings (22.22%) - E- Ambros — 1 duck from 1 innings (100%) - John Abnett — 1 duck from 1 innings (100%) Cliff holds the summit on a perfect record, but with plenty of season left there's every chance of a changing of the guard. The bowlers of Kent are not finished with Linton Park yet. Next fixture beckons — pads on, bat straight, and may the zero club claim a few more before the season's out. 🦆🍩0️⃣

A quiet one for the record books, ducklings. Two fixtures went into the book this weekend and, remarkably, not a single soul trudged back for nought. Bats were troubled, bowlers were denied, and the exclusive zero club held no induction ceremony whatsoever. 🍩 The Ducks That Weren't Somewhere out there this weekend, batsmen were getting off the mark with almost suspicious regularity. Whether it was flat pitches, generous umpiring, or simply a rare outbreak of competence, the golden duck, the pair, and even the humble plain old nought all evaded capture entirely. The Duck Club committee views this development with polite concern — consistency, after all, is meant to run the other way. Let the record show: two matches, zero ducks, and a season tally that did not move an inch. Enjoy it while it lasts, because as any student of the honours board will tell you, the drought never survives long at Linton Park. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard The chase for 1957 Duck of the Year remains very much alive even in a fallow week: - Cliff Anscombe — 2 ducks from 2 innings, a flawless 100% strike rate. The purest form of consistency the game allows. - Roy Clarke — 2 ducks from 7 innings, 28.57%. Handily placed and not to be discounted. - Bob Arnold — 2 ducks from 9 innings, 22.22%. Steady work in the art of not scoring. - E- Ambros — 1 duck from a single innings, 100%. Early days, but a perfect start by this measure. - John Abnett — 1 duck from a single innings, 100%. Joins Ambros at the summit on debut form. Cliff Anscombe leads the pack on outright ducks, but with the percentages this tight there's everything still to play for. 📅 Looking Ahead A blank weekend is a rare beast in these parts, and the committee suspects it won't last. Fixtures resume shortly, and with them the inevitable procession back to the pavilion for nought. Get your bats out, members — the ducks are only ever one bad shot away. 🦆

Saturday 29th — St Lukes Maidstone CC (1st XI) The 1st XI's top order didn't hang about. At number 2, Bob Brigden was bowled by E- Hollands, his 1st duck of the season and 2nd of a career now 36 innings deep — he sits a respectable 90th of 692 in the all-time roll. On this very date back in 1907, Ernest Cruttenden (1881–1963... sorry, 1881–1912) suffered an identical fate against Town Malling CC, going on to 10 career ducks and the Duck of the Year crown in 1895 — fine company for a Saturday stroll back to the pavilion. Three down the order, E- Ambros arrived at the crease for the very first time in a Linton shirt and departed just as promptly, caught by W- Hunt off the same E- Hollands. A duck on debut — instant and permanent enrolment in the exclusive Debutante Duck club, whether the honour was wanted or not. Fittingly, history echoed exactly a half-century on: Cruttenden's own 1907 nought against Town Malling CC the nearest kindred spirit on record. Sunday 30th — Selsted CC (1st XI) Bob Arnold, bowled by S-v- Smith at number 6, brought up his 2nd duck of the season and a hefty 21st of his career — a tally beaten by only two men in 692 years of Linton batting, good enough for 3rd on the all-time list. A card-carrying member of "Ducks in a Row (4 consecutive)", "Only Two Quacks (with Alan Wilkes)" and "Quacking Together (with John Thirkell)", Arnold's honours board entry is getting rather crowded. On this day in 1956, R- Robinson also fell for nought, against St Lukes Maidstone CC — a more junior member of the club on 1 career duck, 272nd of 692. Closing proceedings, John Abnett was caught by R- Hogben off a- Philpott at number 10 for his 1st duck of the season and 6th of his career, 19 innings in and 29th of 692 all time — another name on the "Ducks in a Row (4 consecutive)" board alongside Arnold. He shares his slice of this-day-in-history with the very same R- Robinson, 1956 vintage. Week in Summary Four ducks from two matches, the 1st XI's sole contribution this week, shared evenly — two apiece — between St Lukes Maidstone CC and Selsted CC. A tidy, if unglamorous, weekend's work for the art of not scoring. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 1. Cliff Anscombe — 2 ducks, 2 innings (100%) 2. Roy Clarke — 2 ducks, 5 innings (40%) 3. Bob Arnold — 2 ducks, 8 innings (25%) 4. E- Ambros — 1 duck, 1 innings (100%) 5. John Abnett — 1 duck, 1 innings (100%) The season presses on, and the next fixture will doubtless offer fresh candidates for the honours board. Bat carefully out there — or don't, and join the club properly. 🦆🍩

A quiet weekend on the Linton Park front, members. Two fixtures played across the 22nd and 23rd of June, and not a single soul troubled the Duck Club's admissions desk. Every bat in action found its way off the mark, some no doubt by the barest and most fortunate of margins. 0️⃣ THE HUNT THAT WASN'T Rest assured this is no reflection on effort. The Duck Club does not manufacture ignominy where none was earned, and this week the ducks simply evaded capture. Somewhere out there a batsman edged one through the slips for a single when a golden duck was there for the taking, and he will never know how close he came to glory. Consider it a mulligan, not a drought — normal service, and normal noughts, will resume. 🏏 WEEK IN SUMMARY Matches played: 2 Ducks recorded: 0 Duck rate for the period: a flawless, if faintly disappointing, 0% Even the record books need the odd blank page. Let it be known 1957 has not gone soft — the season standings below tell a rather different story. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Cliff Anscombe — 2 innings, 2 ducks, 100% — a perfect record of imperfection, not a single run to his name all season 2. Roy Clarke — 4 innings, 2 ducks, 50% — level pegging, on the bat and off it 3. Clive Smith — 2 innings, 1 duck, 50% — a coin-flip campaign so far 4. Tony Snell — 4 innings, 1 duck, 25% — keeping his powder, and his average, respectably dry 5. William Blight — 6 innings, 1 duck, 16.67% — the most industrious of the five, ducking only when the mood truly takes him Cliff Anscombe remains the man to beat for Duck of the Year 1957, a immaculate 100% record that will take some catching — in every sense. 🍩 LOOKING AHEAD The exclusive zero club stands ready to welcome new members the moment the fixtures resume. Somewhere out there next weekend, a batsman is currently sharpening a stroke that will do absolutely nothing for his team's total. We'll be watching. We'll be waiting. And we'll be delighted to report it. See you all at the next match — bring your bats, and, ideally for our purposes, leave them unused. 🦆

Two fixtures, two lonely walks back to the pavilion this week — the exclusive zero club welcomes fresh business. 🏏 1st XI Saturday away at Headcorn CC, Roy Clarke was trapped lbw by L- Murrell batting at number ten, a tidy demonstration of the art of not scoring. It's his 2nd duck of the season and 2nd of his career from just 3 innings, sending him to 127th of 688 in the all-time standings — and, courtesy of a "Quacking Together" honours-board entry, into permanent company with John Ames. On this very day back in 1887, Jack Fryer was also making his own contribution to the tradition against East Peckham CC — a two-time Duck of the Year (1891 and 1900) who finished 7th all-time on 12, playing from 1881 to 1906. Some things never change. Sunday away at Halfway House, Cliff Anscombe fell caught and bowled by Don Capeling at number eight — his 2nd duck of the season, and remarkably his 2nd career duck from only 2 innings. A card-carrying member of the Debutante Duck club, his very first Linton innings was fittingly also nought, and he now sits 95th of 688 all-time. With a flawless 100% record so far this season, Cliff currently wears the Duck of the Year 1957 crown outright. Back on this same date in 1951, Bob Arnold — a genuine titan of the genre, 20 career ducks, 3rd all-time, four in a row at one point, and owner of two separate "Quacking Together" honours — was doing precisely the same thing against Maths School Rochester. 📋 Week in Summary Two matches, two ducks, both away from home, both courtesy of the 1st XI — Headcorn and Halfway House may consider themselves duly thanked for their hospitality. No pairs, no family affairs this week, just honest, unaccompanied failure. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Cliff Anscombe — 2 innings, 2 ducks, 100% - Roy Clarke — 3 innings, 2 ducks, 66.67% - Clive Smith — 2 innings, 1 duck, 50% - Tony Snell — 4 innings, 1 duck, 25% - William Blight — 5 innings, 1 duck, 20% Cliff leads the way on a coveted 100% and will take some shifting, though the season is young yet. Plenty of time for the rest of the club to stake their own claim to infamy — next match, next chance. The ducks will be watching. 🦆🏏0️⃣

Two fixtures on the books this weekend and the Zero Club kept things refreshingly modest — just the one nought to record. Quality over quantity, as the old pros say. 🏏 Saturday 8th June — Away at Tilling Steven 1st XI Roy Clarke did his bit for the cause at number nine, caught and bowled by B. Allard without troubling the scorers. It's his 1st duck of the season and, more notably, his 1st career duck from just 2 innings — a tidy entry into the exclusive zero club that leaves him 272nd of 687 in the all-time standings. Roy is also a paid-up member of the "Quacking Together" honours board alongside John Ames, though that particular shared indignity belongs to history rather than this weekend. Sharp-eyed students of the calendar will note that on this very day in 1940, Stan Pierce also strolled back for nought against Loose CC — a reminder that the art of not scoring has never gone out of fashion at Linton Park. 🌱 Sunday 9th–10th June Quiet on the duck front — no further additions to report, a rare weekend of restraint from the club's more vulnerable batting orders. 📋 Week in Summary One duck from two matches — a slow week for the Hunting Season, but the season is long and complacency has ended many a promising average. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Cliff Anscombe — 1 duck / 1 innings (100%) - Clive Smith — 1 duck / 2 innings (50%) - Roy Clarke — 1 duck / 2 innings (50%) - Tony Snell — 1 duck / 4 innings (25%) - William Blight — 1 duck / 4 innings (25%) Cliff Anscombe leads the pack on a perfect record — though with only one innings to his name, there's still time for someone to swoop in and steal top spot. 🦆 The next fixture awaits, and the ducks never sleep. Bring your bat, and bring your nerve — 0️⃣🍩

Two fixtures, two full scorecards, and not a single nought to show for it. The zero club held its breath this weekend and, agonisingly, exhaled empty-handed. 🏏 The Weekend That Wasn't Both matches ran their course without a solitary duck troubling the honours board. Batsmen came, batsmen went, but every single one of them, infuriatingly, got off the mark first. Whether this was good form, generous bowling, or simple bad luck for the Duck Club is a matter for the historians — either way, the art of not scoring took a rare weekend off. Consistency of a very particular kind was, for once, nowhere to be found. Even the club's most reliable duck-hunters emerged unscathed, and the exclusive zero club processed no new applications. A place of dubious distinction briefly became a place of no distinction at all. We live in hope. There is always next Saturday. 0️⃣ Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 0️⃣ 1. Cliff Anscombe — 1 duck from 1 innings (100%) — a perfect, if brief, record 2. Clive Smith — 1 duck from 2 innings (50%) 3. Tony Snell — 1 duck from 3 innings (33%) 4. Bob Arnold — 1 duck from 4 innings (25%) 5. William Blight — 1 duck from 4 innings (25%) An early-season table with Cliff Anscombe sitting pretty at the summit on a flawless 100% strike rate — though with only one innings on the board, that crown is one healthy score away from crumbling entirely. 📅 Looking Ahead The ducks evaded capture this week, but they are out there somewhere, biding their time. Get down to the ground next fixture and give the Duck Club selectors something to work with — the honours board has plenty of room left, and it isn't going to fill itself. We watch. We wait. We celebrate. 🦆🏏🍩

Two fixtures out on the paddock this weekend as the 1957 campaign gathers pace, and only one soul answered the roll call of the exclusive zero club — but it was a debut to remember. 🏏 1st XI Cliff Anscombe strode out at number six against Ron Aiston's XI on 26 May and departed stumped, L Smith to C Nicholls, without troubling the scorer. A duck on his very first senior innings for the club — about as dramatic an opening statement as cricket allows — and it earns him immediate, permanent membership of the Debutante Duck honours board. Season tally: 1. Career tally: 1, from a single innings. Cliff slots in at a respectable 172nd of 687 in the club's all-time roll of dubious distinction, and with the season's very first duck already banked, he currently tops the 1957 Duck of the Year table. Admittedly a field of one so far — but someone has to lead it, and leading it he is. A neat footnote for the historians: on this very day back in 1956, William Buck also strolled back for nought, against Gore Court CC. Buck, of the 1950–1957 vintage, finished his career on 6 ducks — 31st of 687 all time — and sits on the Quacking Together board alongside John Thirkell. The calendar, it turns out, has a long memory for these things. The weekend's second fixture, by contrast, proved a thoroughly vegan affair — not a duck to be found anywhere in it. 📋 Week in Summary One duck from two matches is a quiet return by the club's standards, but a genuine duck-on-debut is a collector's item all the same, and Cliff has set the early pace nicely. The 1957 Duck of the Year race is his to lose — for now. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Cliff Anscombe — 1 inns, 1 duck (100%) - Clive Smith — 2 inns, 1 duck (50%) - Tony Snell — 3 inns, 1 duck (33%) - William Blight — 3 inns, 1 duck (33%) - Bob Arnold — 4 inns, 1 duck (25%) Fine margins at the top and plenty of season left to shuffle them. Next fixture awaits — the ducks are out there somewhere, and the Duck Club will be watching closely. 🦆🍩0️⃣

Two fixtures on the books this weekend, and the exclusive zero club welcomed exactly two new entries — both, as it happens, at the hands of Gore Court CC. 🏏 Saturday 18 May — 1st XI away at Gore Court CC William Blight strode out at first wicket down and departed just as promptly, caught Brian Reynolds bowled Brian Allsworth. It's his 1st duck of the summer and the 9th of a career now standing at 59 innings — good enough for 17th on the all-time list of dubious distinction. On this very day back in 1940, Joe Fenner was performing the identical ceremony against Staplehurst CC, one of five ducks across a career running 1940–1953, and sitting 37th in the all-time reckoning. Some things, evidently, are hereditary to the fixture list rather than the family. Down at number ten, Tony Snell kept the tradition alive, caught Maurice Ingleton off Alec E Allsworth without troubling the scorers. His 1st of the season lifts him to 7 career ducks — 23rd all-time — and he does it as a fully paid-up member of the Ducks in a Row (4 consecutive) honours board, a testament to consistency of a very particular kind. Snell, too, finds company on the calendar: the same 1940 date claims Joe Fenner among its victims, proof that 18 May has long had a taste for Linton batting. 🌱 Sunday 19 May A quieter day in the field — the second fixture of the weekend passed without addition to the ledger. The art of not scoring took the day off. 📊 Week in Summary Two matches, two ducks, both harvested in the same innings at Gore Court CC — a tidy, if unspectacular, weekend for the Duck Club. No pairs, no family affairs, just honest toil in the middle order and the tail alike. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Clive Smith — 1 duck from 2 innings (50%) 2. William Blight — 1 duck from 2 innings (50%) 3. Tony Snell — 1 duck from 3 innings (33.33%) 4. Bob Arnold — 1 duck from 4 innings (25%) Early doors yet in the 1957 campaign, but the percentages don't lie — triumph through adversity is very much the order of the day at the top of this table. Next fixture beckons, and with it, no doubt, fresh candidates for the honours board. The Duck Club watches, waits, and celebrates. 🦆🍩

A quiet weekend on the noughts front, Linton's ducks apparently on their Whitsun holidays — but two fixtures were enough for one name to slip through the gate and into the record books. 1st XI At home to West Farleigh CC, Clive Smith walked out at first wicket down and departed just as briskly, caught G Tomkinson off the bowling of Ron Kemp. A first duck of the 1957 campaign for Clive, and the third of a career now running to 17 innings — enough to settle him at 67th in the club's all-time table of futility, 685 names deep and counting. Neatly, the calendar obliged with company: on this very day back in 1906, D H Luck also trudged back for nought, against Town Malling CC no less. Fifty-one years apart, same solemn ritual — the art of not scoring is evidently timeless at Linton Park. No further casualties elsewhere across the weekend's second fixture — a rare mercy for the bowlers, and a quieter entry than most for the Duck Club minute book. Week in Brief Two matches, one duck. A modest haul, but the season is young and history suggests Linton batsmen rarely stay disciplined for long. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 🏆 1. Clive Smith — 2 innings, 1 duck (50%) 2. Bob Arnold — 3 innings, 1 duck (33.33%) Early days yet in the 1957 hunt, with the top of the table still very much up for grabs. 🦆🥇 Roll on the next fixture — the ducks may be lying low, but Linton Park is never short of volunteers for the zero club. See you at the crease! 🏏0️⃣

A quiet weekend by the exclusive standards of the zero club — just the one nought banked across two fixtures. Sometimes the ducks go to ground. This week, only one waddled into view. 🏏 Saturday 4th May — 1st XI v Hunton Wanderers CC (Home) Coming in at seven, Bob Arnold departed c A Pilcher b M Owen, opening his account for the 1957 campaign with his 1st duck of the season. Nothing new for Bob, mind — this is his 20th career duck from 96 innings, a tally that plants him at a startling 3rd of 683 in the all-time standings. Rarefied company indeed, and no small feat of consistency in the art of not scoring. Bob is, of course, no stranger to the honours boards. A noted member of "Ducks in a Row," having once strung together four consecutive noughts — a feat requiring genuine dedication to the cause — he also shares "Only Two Quacks" with Alan Wilkes and "Quacking Together" with John Thirkell, standing reminders that misery, historically, has loved company at Linton Park. Splendidly, the record books show he is not even original in his timing: on this very day back in 1940, W. Barton also trudged off for a duck against Marden CC, Kent — a fleeting one-season player whose pair of career ducks (rank 130 of 683) now echoes down the decades alongside Bob's own. 🌱 Sunday 5th May The second fixture of the weekend passed off duck-free — a rare afternoon of everyone troubling the scorer, however modestly. The Duck Club logs it and moves on. 📊 Week in Summary One duck from two matches is a lean return by recent standards — perhaps the bowlers were too generous, or the batting too obstinate. Either way, Bob Arnold stands alone as this week's sole inductee, carrying the flag for the entire club. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Bob Arnold — 2 innings, 1 duck, 50% A one-man leaderboard for now, with the season young. Plenty of time yet for challengers to make their case. Same time next week — the season is only getting started, and the ducks, as ever, are watching from the reeds. 🦆🍩0️⃣

A rare and frankly disappointing turn of events from Linton Park this week: one match played, and not a single duck to show for it. Every batsman who walked to the crease also walked back with runs against his name, however humble. The exclusive zero club held no induction ceremony this week. For the purists among us, this is nothing to celebrate — the art of not scoring is a craft, and crafts require practice. Somewhere out there a golden duck went unclaimed, a king pair sat un-registered, and the honours boards gathered dust for another week. We can only assume the opposition bowlers were off their game, or that our own batsmen were, most inconveniently, all in decent touch. 🍩 Week in Summary - 1 match played - 0 ducks recorded - A statistically improbable afternoon of everyone troubling the scorers Duck Hunting Season leaderboard The 1957 season is yet to produce its first entries — the honours board stands empty, awaiting its opening ceremony. Every legend starts somewhere, and right now that somewhere is nowhere. Plenty of time yet for the front-runners to emerge. 🏏 Looking Ahead Fear not — this drought cannot last. The Duck Club is a patient institution, and Linton's batsmen have rarely gone two weeks without offering up at least one nick, one leave-that-wasn't, or one confident forward defensive to a ball that wasn't there. Next fixture, the ducks will surely return to roost. Until then — bats up, heads down, and may your outside edge stay quiet a little longer. 🦆🏏0️⃣