🦆 The Duck Pond

Two matches came and went this weekend and, remarkably, not a single Linton batsman could manage to get out for nought. The zero club sat empty, the honours board gathered no new names, and the Duck Hunting Season's most prolific marksmen were, for once, made to look rather ordinary at their trade. A lament, frankly. Somewhere out there a duck escaped the net, and it will not happen again in a hurry. 🍩 The Week That Wasn't Both fixtures passed off without incident — bat met ball, runs were accumulated, and the art of not scoring took an unscheduled weekend off. No pairs, no kings, no family affairs to report. Even the leaderboard's usual suspects were denied their weekly top-up. A quiet weekend for the club, but a loud one for anyone hoping to see history made. Still, as any seasoned member of the Duck Club will tell you, form is temporary — the zero is eternal. There is always next Saturday. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 9 ducks in 27 innings (33.33%) 2. Gareth Davies — 5 ducks in 11 innings (45.45%) — the division's most efficient marksman by some distance 3. Richard Piper — 5 ducks in 37 innings (13.51%) 4. Chris Newman — 4 ducks in 13 innings (30.77%) 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks in 12 innings (25.00%) Gareth Davies remains the man to watch on sheer strike rate — a near coin-flip chance of a duck every time he walks out, which is either alarming or admirable depending on your allegiance. Christopher Thirkell holds the volume crown for now, but with Simon also flying the Thirkell colours, this could yet become a family monopoly on the season's top honours. 📅 Looking Ahead The ducks evaded capture this week, but they always resurface. Get your fixtures in, keep an eye on those top-order nerves, and let's see who's first to add to the tally next time out. We watch. We wait. We celebrate. 0️⃣🏏🦆

A lament, if you will permit one. Three matches played across the closing days of the season, and not a single duck to show for it. Eleven-plus batsmen per side, all of them, apparently, minded to trouble the scorers. The Duck Club committee has convened in emergency session and can confirm: the exclusive zero club held no inductions this week. The art of not scoring, it seems, took a rare Saturday off. Whether this represents a shocking outbreak of competence across the club or simply a run of very forgiving bowling attacks, the record does not say. What it does say is that for three whole fixtures, every single dismissal carried the indignity of at least one run against the batsman's name. Frankly, un-Linton-like behaviour, and the committee trusts normal service resumes shortly. Still - a quiet week for the hunters is not a wasted one. The season standings remain fiercely contested, and with the campaign drawing to a close there's still time for the also-rans to make a late run at glory. 🍩 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🍩 1. Christopher Thirkell — 9 ducks from 27 innings (33.3%) 2. Gareth Davies — 5 ducks from 11 innings (45.5%) — the division's most efficient collector, pound for pound 3. Richard Piper — 5 ducks from 35 innings (14.3%) 4. Chris Newman — 4 ducks from 13 innings (30.8%) 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks from 12 innings (25.0%) Gareth Davies, it should be noted, is putting in a serious shift at the top of the percentages - a 45% strike rate for nought is the kind of consistency the club exists to honour. Meanwhile the Thirkell name holds down two of the top five spots, which either speaks to a family gene for the golden zero or simply a lot of overs faced. The committee makes no further comment. 📅 Onward The season isn't done yet, and neither is the hunt. Somewhere out there a batsman is shouldering arms to one that clips the top of off, or shuffling across their stumps for a plumb lbw first ball. We simply await the paperwork. Next fixture, normal service expected to resume. The ducks, we are reliably informed, have merely gone to ground - not extinct. 🦆0️⃣

Two fixtures. Zero ducks. The Duck Club regrets to announce that, for one weekend only, Linton Park batted like a side that had actually turned up to score runs. It happens. Even the most reliable poultry farm has a fallow week, and this was it — 22 (or so) trips to the crease across Saturday and Sunday and not a single nought among them. No golden ducks, no king pairs, no family gatherings on the honours board, nothing for the scorers to smirk about. The exclusive zero club held no inductions this week, and its existing membership can rest easy in their positions on the all-time boards a little longer. Whether this represents a genuine outbreak of competence or simply a temporary evasion of fate, only next weekend will tell. The ducks are out there. They are, this week, merely uncaught. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🏆 Standings remain as they were, and what standings they are: 1. Christopher Thirkell — 9 ducks from 27 innings (33.3%) 🥇 2. Gareth Davies — 5 ducks from 10 innings (50.0%) — a genuinely alarming coin-flip of a season 3. Richard Piper — 5 ducks from 33 innings (15.15%) 4. Chris Newman — 4 ducks from 13 innings (30.77%) 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks from 12 innings (25.0%) Gareth Davies remains the season's great cautionary tale, converting one in every two innings into a duck with the grim efficiency of a man who has simply stopped looking at the bowler. Christopher Thirkell leads on volume, but the percentage race is Gareth's to lose. So there we are — a quiet week for the Duck Club, but the season is far from settled and the honours board never sleeps for long. Next fixture, normal service will surely resume. Bats at the ready, and may the odds be ever un-favourable. 🦆🏏0️⃣

A quiet weekend for the Zero Club — only one soul answered the call of the nought across three fixtures. Sparse pickings, but quality over quantity, as ever. Saturday 3 September 2nd XI v Lord Raglan (home) Number seven Chris Quirk strode out and returned scoreless — run out before he could get off the mark, the identity of the fielder lost to history ("run out Unsure" says it all, the scorebook shrugging along with the rest of us). The Zero Club welcomes him regardless of the manner of his despatch. This is Chris's first duck for the club — his 1st of the season and 1st of what may prove a long and distinguished career of noughts — arriving in only his second senior innings. That's rank 391 of 1314 in the all-time standings, plenty of room to climb from here. He already carries a place on the Retirement Duck board among his colours, a badge for the ages rather than any comment on his current form. On this very day back in 1972, a young Benny Bell was doing exactly the same thing against Staplehurst CC — the first of what became 30 ducks across a 1966-1975 career, good enough for 29th of 1314 all time. Some traditions never die. Elsewhere across the club's other two fixtures this weekend, the bowlers came up empty-handed and the batting order stayed frustratingly intact — a rare weekend where the ducks well and truly evaded capture. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Christopher Thirkell — 9 ducks / 26 innings (34.6%) - Gareth Davies — 5 ducks / 10 innings (50.0%) - Richard Piper — 5 ducks / 31 innings (16.1%) - Chris Newman — 4 ducks / 13 innings (30.8%) - Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks / 11 innings (27.3%) Gareth Davies quietly posts the most alarming strike rate of the lot, but Christopher Thirkell's raw tally keeps him out in front for Duck of the Year. Next weekend brings more fixtures and, no doubt, more names for the honours board — get down to the ground and see who joins Chris in the exclusive zero club. 🏏🍩0️⃣

A quiet weekend on the Duck Hunting front, ladies and gentlemen. Two fixtures played, and — almost unthinkably — not a single nought to report. The exclusive zero club held no inductions, no repeat offenders, and no fresh entries to the honours board this week. Every Linton bat that walked to the crease found a way to trouble the scorers, however briefly. Whether this represents a sudden and worrying outbreak of competence, or simply the ducks taking a well-earned weekend off, the correspondent cannot say. Rest assured, normal service — by which we mean abject, celebrated failure — will resume in due course. The art of not scoring is, after all, a marathon and not a sprint. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 Christopher Thirkell — 26 innings, 9 ducks, 34.6% 🥈 Gareth Davies — 10 innings, 5 ducks, 50.0% 🥉 Richard Piper — 29 innings, 5 ducks, 17.2% 4️⃣ Chris Newman — 13 innings, 4 ducks, 30.8% 5️⃣ Simon Thirkell — 10 innings, 3 ducks, 30.0% Gareth Davies remains the man to watch on pure strike rate, sitting on a startling 50% conversion of innings into noughts — truly a specialist's specialist. Christopher Thirkell holds the volume crown with nine for the season and will fancy his chances of adding to it before the year is out. 🍩 A blank week is a rare thing at LPCC, but the ducks are surely only resting up, sharpening their beaks, and plotting a comeback. Get out to the middle next weekend and give them something to work with — the honours board never fills itself. 0️⃣🏏🦆

Two fixtures out on the paddock this weekend and the Duck Club's hunters were, frankly, having a quiet one. A single nought to report — but as ever, quality over quantity, and this one's worth a proper airing. Saturday 20th August 1st XI v Hollingbourne CC Kevin Presneill, holding it down at number 6, departed c Robert Clark b Mark Styche for nought — a tidy piece of work from the visitors, and a rather less tidy one for Kevin. This is his 2nd duck of the campaign and his 8th for the club overall from 69 innings, tucking him in at 107th of 1314 in the all-time registry. Not yet troubling the honours boards, but the ledger is being kept diligently all the same. Rather charmingly, on this very day back in 1944, W Bunting also strolled back for a duck against KCC Maidstone — one of five ducks across a career spanning 1941 to 1948, and good for 155th on the all-time list. Sixty-one years apart, same fate, same shrug. The art of not scoring is timeless. Sunday 21st August No further additions from Sunday's fixture — a rare afternoon where LPCC's batting order kept its collective nerve and the exclusive zero club had to make do with the one applicant. 📋 Week in Summary One duck from two matches is a lean haul by the Duck Club's usual standards of dubious distinction, but Kevin Presneill has done his bit to keep the season ticking over. The rest of the club, disappointingly, batted with a straight face all weekend. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 9 ducks from 26 innings (34.62%) 2. Gareth Davies — 5 ducks from 10 innings (50.0%) 3. Richard Piper — 5 ducks from 28 innings (17.86%) 4. Chris Newman — 4 ducks from 12 innings (33.33%) 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks from 10 innings (30.0%) Gareth Davies remains the man to watch on sheer strike rate — one duck every two innings is a consistency of a very particular kind. Christopher Thirkell holds the volume crown for now, but the season's far from done. 🍩 Next weekend's fixtures await, and with them, no doubt, fresh triumphs through adversity. The zero club never closes its books — get out there and see who's added to the tally. 0️⃣🏏

A modest haul this week, ladies and gentlemen. Three fixtures on the fixture list, and the exclusive zero club admitted just two new entries — both from the same afternoon, both to the same bowler. Consistency of a very particular kind. 🏏 Sunday 1st XI — away to Harvel CC, 14th August Batting at first drop, Tom Motum departed for nought, bowled by Tom Emmitt. It's duck number 2 of the season for Tom, and his 2nd in a career now standing at 16 innings — placing him 321st of 1314 in the all-time roll of dishonour. Fittingly, on this very day back in 1988, club great Simon Thirkell (1980–2005, 51 career ducks, all-time rank 9) was also strolling back for nought, that time against Whitstable CC. Some anniversaries you don't choose. Two down at number four came Jack Jenner, also undone by Tom Emmitt — who was clearly in no mood to let anyone troouble the scorers. It's Jack's 2nd duck of the season and 4th of his career from 27 innings, good for 170th of 1314 all-time. Jack is also a paid-up member of the Retirement Duck club from a past farewell innings, a standing honour rather than anything to do with today's dismissal — he's very much still opening the innings, not closing the book. And he too joins the on-this-day almanac alongside Simon Thirkell's 1988 vintage — a second reminder this week of what August the 14th can do to a batting line-up. 🔥 Elsewhere The rest of the club's fixtures passed off in disappointingly vegan fashion — no further fowl to report from either the Saturday sides or the other Sunday outing. Harvel CC and, specifically, the right arm of Tom Emmitt, can claim sole credit for this week's tally. 📊 Week in Summary Three matches, two ducks, one bowler doing all the damage. Not a vintage week for volume, but quality control was evidently high — both victims fell in the same over-ish spell, to the same man, in the same game. Make of that what you will. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 9 ducks / 26 innings (34.6%) 2. Gareth Davies — 5 ducks / 10 innings (50.0%) 3. Richard Piper — 5 ducks / 27 innings (18.5%) 4. Chris Newman — 4 ducks / 11 innings (36.4%) 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks / 10 innings (30.0%) Gareth Davies still setting the pace for sheer strike rate — half his innings ending in the walk of shame. Christopher Thirkell leads on volume and shows no sign of slowing. 🍩 Next fixture awaits, and with it, fresh opportunity for triumph through adversity. The art of not scoring never sleeps — see you at the crease. 0️⃣🦆

A tidy little haul this week: six ducks laid across three matches, with one fixture escaping entirely unscathed. The exclusive zero club welcomes its latest inductees below. Saturday 6th — 2nd XI v Town Malling CC Batting at 10, Dave Todd was snaffled behind, caught Brady bowled Simon Uttridge, for his 2nd duck of the season and 18th of a long and distinguished career — a tally that plants him at 56th of 1313 in the all-time roll of dishonour. On this very day in 1989, Dave Charlton was doing much the same against Chadwell Thors Oak CC, en route to 25 career ducks and 41st on the list. Some traditions simply refuse to die. Sunday 7th — Sunday 2nd XI v Selling CC Tom Motum, bowled by the splendidly initialled H-a-R- Alexander at first drop, recorded a rarer beast: his maiden career duck, arriving only after 15 quietly successful innings. Season duck number 1, career duck number 1 — the purest kind of debut, even if the scorebook insists it wasn't. On this day in 1976, Colin Dicker fell the same way against Headcorn CC, a man who'd go on to claim Duck of the Year honours in both 1973 and 1975. Tom, the bar has been set. Wednesday 10th — Midweek XI v The Mote CC A proper clatter here — four ducks in one innings, the kind of collapse the club secretly treasures. Opener Russell Baldwin fell first, caught Alex Boorman bowled Dane Smith, his 3rd of the season and 17th career duck (62nd all-time). This fixture, on this day in 1991, also claimed Paul Gibson, a paid-up member of the Platinum Duck club for once departing first ball of the game entirely — Russell's effort was comparatively leisurely. Adam Jackson followed, bowled Tom Parsons for his 2nd of the season and 6th career duck, joining the great and good at 125th all-time — a chip off the old block, with sibling Rob Jackson sitting on 13 career noughts of his own. 1991 also brought Simon Thirkell to grief in this fixture, a man who'd finish with 50 ducks before his 50th run and two Duck of the Year titles to his name. Mark Christmas was next, bowled Nicholas Daking, his 3rd of the season and 8th career duck (107th all-time) — a Full House nearly-man, having ducked at 10 of the 11 possible batting positions and surely eyeing off the last. Nick Stephens shares this fixture's history, a rare owner of the Quack-to-Quack double, debut and farewell both marked with a nought. And to complete the set, Matthew Carter fell lbw to the same Nicholas Daking, his 1st duck of the season but 12th of a career that already includes a Duck of the Year title in 2004 and paid-up Debutante Duck membership from years back. Back in 1958, Roy Clarke made his own contribution to this fixture's history, later crowned Duck of the Year in 1959. Week in summary Six ducks from four matches, with one fixture keeping its scorecard spotlessly fowl-free. Nicholas Daking can rightly claim a brace of his own this week, accounting for two of Midweek's four departures. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 9 ducks, 25 innings (36.0%) 2. Gareth Davies — 5 ducks, 10 innings (50.0%) 3. Richard Piper — 5 ducks, 25 innings (20.0%) 4. Chris Newman — 4 ducks, 11 innings (36.4%) 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks, 10 innings (30.0%) Gareth Davies still boasts the division's most alarming strike rate — one duck every two innings. Can anyone catch him before season's end? See you all at the next fixture — the ducks are never far away. 🦆🏏0️⃣

A quiet week for the counters at Linton Park — just three ducks across two fixtures — but quality over quantity, and this lot included some proper club royalty in the runs-avoidance department. 🏏 Sunday 1st XI v Downham & Bellingham CC (31 July) The exclusive zero club welcomed two new entries in the same innings. Richard Piper, in at four, was caught behind off David Powell without troubling the scorers — his 5th duck of the season and 41st of an extraordinary career, good enough for 17th on the all-time list. Richard remains a fixture of the Full House, Lone Duck and Homebody Duck top tens, a former Duck of the Year (2003), and evidently comes from stock — father Brian sits on 22 career ducks, brother James on 3. On this very day back in 1996, Gareth Thomas was completing an identical rite of passage against Ipswich Greyhounds CC on the Kent Tour, one of three ducks in a career (1980–1996) that later earned him entry to the Retirement Duck club. Later in the same innings, Mark Christmas joined the queue, bowled by John Sawyer for nought — his 2nd duck of the season and 7th of his career. Mark can console himself with membership of the "Full House nearly-man" club, having managed ducks at 10 of the possible 11 batting positions — one shy of completing the set. Room for one more this season, perhaps. He shares his on-this-day company with the same Gareth Thomas — a doubly historic afternoon at Downham & Bellingham. 🕰️ Midweek XI v Bexley CC (2 August) Michael Beeney, in at 10, was caught by George Wells off Chris Woolley for his 1st duck of the season and 21st of his career — 52nd on the all-time rankings from a hefty 169 innings. Michael carries serious pedigree here: a Diamond Duck from 2002 (out without facing a ball), one half of "Only Two Quacks" with Ian Brattle, and a paid-up member of the Retirement Duck club from a past farewell. His son Thomas already has a career duck to his name — the apple, evidently, not falling far. On this day in 1944, E- Humphreys was doing much the same against the National Fire Service Overseas Contingent, part of a brief 1941–1945 career and a single career duck to show for it. 📊 The Week in Brief Two matches, three ducks, and Downham & Bellingham providing the rare pleasure of a same-innings double. Nothing to trouble the Duck of the Year race just yet — but the season is young, and Linton's finest are only warming up. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 9 ducks in 23 innings (39.13%) 2. Gareth Davies — 5 ducks in 10 innings (50.0%) 3. Richard Piper — 5 ducks in 22 innings (22.73%) 4. Chris Newman — 4 ducks in 11 innings (36.36%) 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks in 9 innings (33.33%) Gareth Davies leads on strike rate, but it's Christopher Thirkell's volume keeping him top of the pile. Can anyone catch him before season's end? 🦆 Same time next week — the ducks never stop coming. Bring your bat, and preferably some runs.

Sheldwich CC did plenty of collecting on derby day, taking four Linton wickets for precisely nothing across two fixtures — a rich afternoon for the club ledger. 🏏 1st XI (home) Stuart Cheesman departed at number six, run out by James Creed, for his 1st duck of the season — the 38th of a long career spanning 352 innings, good enough for 23rd on the all-time list. A double Duck of the Year winner (1994 and 1996), Stuart is also a fully paid-up Full House member, having now ducked in every position from 1 to 11 — the art of not scoring, mastered from every angle. On this very date in 1960, Brian Relf was doing much the same against Tovil, one of 25 career ducks in a career running 1950–1971 that later earned him a spot on the Retirement Duck board, bowing out — as tradition demands — on a nought. 🏏 2nd XI (away) Three fell at Sheldwich for the seconds. Christopher Thirkell edged Jon Taylor through to Darren Halls at number six for his 9th duck of the season, cementing his lead in this year's Duck of the Year race, and his 22nd career duck from 113 innings — 49th on the all-time list. He's a Full House nearly-man too, ducking in 10 of the game's 11 positions and still chasing that last elusive slot. Fittingly, it was on this same date in 1960 that Brian Relf made his own contribution to Tovil's bowling figures. Darren Styles followed, caught behind off A Creed at number nine, his 3rd of the season and 10th of a career now at 159 innings — 89th all-time. Number ten Gareth Davies completed the collapse, stumped by Halls off Creed, his 5th duck of the season and 6th of a fledgling 16-innings career — 132nd on the all-time list and climbing fast. Both share their moment in history with Brian Relf's 1960 vintage — evidently a popular date for getting off, or rather not off, the mark. 📊 Week in Summary Four ducks from two matches, all to Sheldwich's bowlers, all from number six downwards — the top order stayed conspicuously unscathed. Darren Halls was involved in three of the four dismissals, a fine advert for standing behind the stumps. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 9 ducks, 21 innings (42.86%) 2. Gareth Davies — 5 ducks, 10 innings (50.00%) 3. Chris Newman — 4 ducks, 11 innings (36.36%) 4. Richard Piper — 4 ducks, 20 innings (20.00%) 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks, 9 innings (33.33%) Next fixture awaits, and with Christopher Thirkell and Gareth Davies both well-versed in the walk back to the pavilion, the race for this year's Duck of the Year is far from settled. Bring your bats, gentlemen — or don't bother. 🦆🍩0️⃣

Bearsted CC did for both Linton XIs in one Saturday afternoon, before Blue Star CC picked off a couple more on Sunday. Five ducks from four matches — business very much as usual in the exclusive zero club. 🏏 Saturday, Bearsted CC 1st XI — Stewart Morrison, promoted to five, was bowled by Stephen Pearce for his solitary duck of the season, his 38th in a Linton career now 350 innings deep, good enough for 22nd on the all-time list. A charter member of the Debutante Duck society (his very first Linton knock was also a blob) and a Duck of the Year winner back in 2000, Stewart remains one 11th-position innings shy of completing the Full House. On this very day in 1960, Gordon Fenner (1941–1973, 34 career ducks) was also shouldering arms, against Rumwood CC — some things are evidently seasonal. Sibling Phillip Morrison, meanwhile, watches the family average from a respectful 2 career ducks. 2nd XI — Christopher Thirkell was bowled by Thomas Judges for his 8th duck of the campaign, 20 innings in at a startling 40% strike rate for nought, all but crowning himself this year's Duck of the Year before August has even arrived. His 21st career duck moves him to 51st all-time, and heaven help the rest of the Thirkell dynasty trying to keep pace — John (90), Tim (78), Nigel (57), Simon (51) and Daniel (20) all still outrank him. Gordon Fenner, 1960 vintage, obliged with a duck of his own on this same day. Dennis Salisbury followed him back, caught behind off Jason Preston-Reeves, for his 2nd of the season and 8th career duck in just 39 innings — 103rd on the club's all-time roll of dishonour. Gordon Fenner, three ducks deep into this report already, was once more at it on this day in 1960. 🌱 Sunday, Blue Star CC Opener David Castle was caught Harper bowled Chenery for his 40th career duck from a marathon 691 innings — 17th all-time and a paid-up member of the Tourist Duck top 10. On this day back in 1993, Nick Froom (1989–1994) was likewise dismissed for nought against Kennington CC, Kent. Ian Hollingworth joined him in the pavilion soon after, caught off a bowler the scorebook records only as "Unsure" — his 2nd of the season and 3rd of an 11-innings career, 208th overall. Nick Froom, 1993 vintage, keeps him company from the history books too. 📊 Week in Summary Five ducks, four matches, Bearsted CC doing the damage twice on Saturday before Blue Star CC finished the job on Sunday. Christopher Thirkell's early charge towards Duck of the Year honours remains the story of the season so far. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 8 ducks / 20 inns (40.0%) 2. Gareth Davies — 4 ducks / 9 inns (44.4%) 3. Chris Newman — 4 ducks / 11 inns (36.4%) 4. Richard Piper — 4 ducks / 19 inns (21.1%) 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks / 9 inns (33.3%) Next fixture looms, and with it, no doubt, further additions to the honours board. The Duck Club never rests. 🦆🍩

Four fresh admissions to the exclusive zero club this week, courtesy of a trip to West Farleigh and a midweek dust-up with the Lord Cornwallis XI. Not a bumper haul, but quality over quantity, as ever, in the art of not scoring. 🏏 2nd XI at West Farleigh CC Christopher Thirkell led the way, bowled by S Spiers for his 7th duck of the season and 20th of a distinguished career, easing him to 52nd in the all-time table and keeping a firm grip on this year's Duck of the Year honours. He's also a nearly-man on the Full House board, having ducked in 10 of the 11 batting positions — presumably position 11 is simply refusing to cooperate. Fittingly, on this very day back in 1994, kinsman Simon Thirkell — sitting a lofty 9th on the all-time list with 51 — was also trudging back against Horton Kirby CC. The noughts, it seems, run in the blood, with brothers, cousins and relations across the Thirkell clan boasting a combined career tally that would embarrass a small flock. Roly Edwards followed him back, bowled by N Manser for his 1st duck of the season, moving to 17 career ducks and 61st on the all-time roll — pulling level with both Dave Todd (223 innings, 1978–2005) and Richard Ellis, the latter a fully paid-up member of the Quack-to-Quack club for his duck on debut and presumed farewell alike. And completing the West Farleigh hat-trick, Gareth Davies was caught by Richard Horsman off S Spiers for his 4th duck of the season, taking him to 5 for his career from just 14 innings — a startling 36% strike rate for nothing at all. He now sits level on career ducks with Adam Jackson (2001–2005) and Adrian Simmonds, the latter another Quack-to-Quack veteran of the 1985–1990 vintage. 🌙 Midweek XI v Lord Cornwallis XI Chris Newman departed caught P Clarkson bowled G Oliver, chalking up his 4th duck of the season and 6th of his career in just 25 innings. He joins Barry Langridge (1963–1975) on the same tally — a man himself immortalised on the honours board for being "Quacked by Kin" by relative Dick Langridge back in 1963. On this same date in 1968, club legend Paul Bowles — now 8th all-time with a mighty 54 — was busy adding to his own pile against Beverley CC, Kent. 📊 Week in Summary Four ducks from five matches, all comfortably dispatched by the bowlers rather than any run-outs or self-inflicted wounds — a clean sweep for the opposition attacks this week. West Farleigh alone accounted for three of the four, which either says a great deal about their bowling or rather less about our top order. No pairs, no king pairs and no family affairs to report this time round — the ducks kept it strictly business. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 7 ducks, 18 innings, 38.89% 2. Gareth Davies — 4 ducks, 8 innings, 50.00% 3. Chris Newman — 4 ducks, 11 innings, 36.36% 4. Richard Piper — 4 ducks, 19 innings, 21.05% 5. Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks, 9 innings, 33.33% Gareth Davies leads the percentage race by some distance, though Christopher Thirkell's volume keeps him top of the pile as the Duck of the Year race hots up. 🍩 The season rolls on and the zero club never sleeps. Next fixture, fresh victims await — bring your bat, or don't bother. 0️⃣🦆

Five fixtures, five ducks, and the honours board barely broke a sweat doing the admin. Here's who joined the exclusive zero club this week. Saturday — 1st XI, away to Hollingbourne CC Craig Sands departed at four, bowled by Robert Clark, for his 1st duck of the season and 4th of a 118-innings career — 161st on the all-time list. On this very day back in 1983, Tim Thirkell (3rd all-time, 78 career ducks, Duck of the Year 1972) was doing the identical thing against Staplehurst CC. Some anniversaries just won't let go. Saturday — 2nd XI, home to Leeds & Broomfield CC A double admission here. Simon Thirkell, lbw to Jason Tharp at six, brings up his 3rd of the season and a mighty 51st career duck — 9th all-time and safely enrolled in the "50 Before a 50" club (59 ducks projected, high score a modest 48). Simon scarcely needs introducing to the honours board at all — father John sits top of the all-time pile on 90, brothers Tim (78) and Nigel (57) aren't far behind, and there are Thirkells further down the list still counting. Fittingly, his own on-this-day namesake is Tim, 1983, same ground as above. Moments later Rob Jackson followed him out, caught off the same Jason Tharp, for his 1st duck of the season and 13th career — a Debutante Duck veteran and Duck of the Year 2002, now sitting level on 13 with 1980s regular Sean Cook (13 from 33 innings). Sibling Adam Jackson, five career ducks and counting, will be taking notes at home. Sunday — 1st XI, home to Clarion CC Mark Christmas opened and closed his innings in the same breath, caught Andy Driver bowled A Smith, for his 1st duck of the season and 6th career — 133rd all-time and still one position shy of completing the Full House. On this day in 1999, James Vincent was doing much the same against Southborough CC. Sunday — 2nd XI, away to Bearsted CC Jack Jenner fell early to Steven Benjamin for his 1st duck of the season and 3rd career, joining a long queue of names on that total stretching back to Victorian times. Jack already carries a Retirement Duck badge from a past farewell on the honours board — evidently a formality nobody enforced, as he's very much still turning out. He shares this week's on-this-day parallel with Mark above: James Vincent, 1999, Southborough CC. Week in Summary Five ducks across five matches, headlined by the Thirkell-Jackson double at Leeds & Broomfield. One fixture this week kept an entirely clean sheet — the ducks evaded capture there, for once. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 🥇 - Christopher Thirkell — 6 ducks / 15 inns (40.0%) - Richard Piper — 4 ducks / 19 inns (21.05%) - Gareth Davies — 3 ducks / 7 inns (42.86%) - Chris Newman — 3 ducks / 9 inns (33.33%) - Simon Thirkell — 3 ducks / 9 inns (33.33%) A Thirkell tops the table, a Thirkell fills in the chasing pack — the family trade continues. Next fixture looms, and with it the inevitable fresh additions. We watch. We wait. We celebrate. 🦆🍩

Three matches in the book this week and the harvest was lean but ceremonial: only two ducks fell, and both answered to the same surname. 🏏 2nd XI v Marden CC, Kent (home, 25 June) The headline act came at five and six in the order, where Linton Park's own Thirkell dynasty took it in turns to walk back for nought. Christopher Thirkell, batting at five, was caught Tony Mortimer bowled Harry Karim for his 6th duck of the season and 19th of an already storied career across 105 innings — good enough for 54th on the all-time list of 1311. With six already banked this summer he tops the current leaderboard by some margin, keeping the "Duck of the Year 2005" board firmly in his own hands, and he's also nursing "Full House nearly-man" status, just one batting position shy of having ducked in all eleven slots. Neatly, on this very day back in 1978, Malcolm Pay (1965–1992, 26 ducks, 37th all-time) also fell to Marden CC, Kent — the club's fondness for gifting Marden a duck evidently runs deep. At six, his father Simon Thirkell was bowled by R Turner for his 2nd duck of the season — and, rather more significantly, his 50th career duck. Full Membership of the Duck Club, ladies and gentlemen. Simon rockets to 9th on the all-time chart of 1311, and already sits on the "50 Before a 50" board too, 59 ducks and a high score of just 48 to show for it — the runs were never really the point. A two-time Duck of the Year already, 1983 and 2001, and a fixture of both the Tourist Duck and Ducks on the Road top tens, Simon joins Malcolm Pay's on-this-day company as well — same year, same opponents, same fate. Little wonder it runs in the blood — the wider Thirkell clan practically owns this club's duck ledger, with John Thirkell's all-time-record 90, Tim's 78 and Nigel's 57 already in the family cabinet. 🦆👨‍👦 And the pièce de résistance — with father and son both back in the shed for nought in the very same innings, this is a bona fide Duck and Ducklings, Simon (50 career) leading young Christopher (19 career) into the record books together. The rarest ceremony the club offers, and the Thirkells make it look effortless. 📊 Week in brief A quiet week by Linton standards, just two ducks from three matches, but quality over quantity — a family double and a Full Membership milestone inside one afternoon is no small return. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 2005 - Christopher Thirkell — 6 ducks, 13 innings (46.15%) - Richard Piper — 4 ducks, 17 innings (23.53%) - Gareth Davies — 3 ducks, 7 innings (42.86%) - Chris Newman — 3 ducks, 8 innings (37.5%) - Darren Styles — 2 ducks, 6 innings (33.33%) Christopher leads the Duck of the Year 2005 race by a distance — can anyone catch him before the season's out? Roll on the next fixture, when Linton Park's top order will no doubt offer up fresh candidates for the honours board. 🦆🏏0️⃣

Four fixtures on the go this week, and the Duck Club needed only two of them to fill its books — but fill them it did. Five fresh entries into the exclusive zero club, headlined by a genuine, card-carrying legend of the art of not scoring. 🏏 Saturday - 2nd XI at Staplehurst CC A middle-and-tail collapse of real ceremony away at Staplehurst — four ducks in the one innings, three of them with Trevor Cardon's name attached. Richard Piper opened the procession at four, c Unsure b C Rogers, his 4th duck of the summer and 40th of a storied career now standing at 264 innings — good enough for 17th on the all-time list. A paid-up member of the Duck of the Year 2003 club, the Full House honours board (a duck at every position, 1 to 11) and both the Homebody and Ducks on the Road top tens, Richard has ducked absolutely everywhere, home and away, in style. He shares the family trade with Brian Piper (22 career ducks) and James Piper (3) — the surname alone should have bowlers licking their lips. On this very day in 1961, Robert Murray was doing much the same against Halfway House, on his way to 17 career ducks. Gareth Davies followed at nine, b Trevor Cardon, his 3rd of the season and 4th in just 13 innings — an alarming strike rate for a newcomer to the club's darker arts. Robert Murray's 1961 vintage keeps him company across the decades, tribute number two of the day. Then Jon Harris at ten, lbw b Trevor Cardon, and this one earns its own paragraph. A quiet 1st duck of the season for Jon, but his 86th in 626 innings, planting him at a magisterial 2nd in the entire 1311-strong all-time standings. Four Duck of the Year titles (1976, 1980, 1981, 1999), the Full House, Only Two Quacks with Allan Cooper, Quacking Together with both Jim Hall and Trevor Back, and membership of the Tourist and Homebody top tens — Jon's trophy cabinet for scoring nothing outshines most players' for scoring runs. Kin in the club too, on 36 career ducks between them, so it plainly runs in the blood. Robert Murray's 1961 duck gets its third invocation of the day. Darren Styles closed it out at eleven, c Unsure b Trevor Cardon, his 2nd of the season and 9th overall from 154 innings, 94th all time — and the fourth and final Linton tribute to Robert Murray's 1961 vintage that Saturday. A clean sweep. 🎯 Tuesday - Twenty20 v West Farleigh CC Adam Jackson departed at two, c & b Paul Baines, his 1st duck of the season and 5th in 68 innings, 137th on the all-time roll. Brother Rob Jackson already carries 12 career ducks, so the Jackson household knows the drill well. Back in 1987, Stewart Morrison made a duck against Dimanchians CC on this same date, en route to 37 career ducks, a Duck of the Year title in 2000 and a place in the Lone Duck top ten. 📋 The Week in Numbers Five ducks from four fixtures — a fertility rate the club will happily bank. Staplehurst did the heaviest lifting, four in a single innings, three of them courtesy of one bowler having entirely too much fun with the tail. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 5 ducks, 12 innings (41.67%) 2. Richard Piper — 4 ducks, 15 innings (26.67%) 3. Gareth Davies — 3 ducks, 7 innings (42.86%) 4. Chris Newman — 3 ducks, 8 innings (37.5%) 5. Darren Styles — 2 ducks, 6 innings (33.33%) Piper, Davies and Styles all move on this very table off the back of this week's efforts — nothing here is settled. Next fixture, the ducks will be out again. Bring your bats, gentlemen, and please try using them. 🦆🍩

Five fixtures took the field this week and, credit where it's due, most of Linton Park's batters kept their bats swinging long enough to trouble the scorers. Only two souls surrendered to the zero — a quiet week by the club's own exacting standards, but quality over quantity, as ever, in the exclusive zero club. Saturday 11 June — 2nd XI v Horton Kirby CC (home) Coming in at number 10, Tim Thirkell was run out without troubling the scoreboard — his 2nd duck of the campaign and a chunky 78th of a career now standing at number 3 in the all-time charts, one of only two men in club history to have breached three figures... well, not quite, but breathing that rarefied air nonetheless. A Full House member (a duck banked at every position from 1 to 11 — position 10 today ticks another box), a former Duck of the Year in 1972, and a fixture of both the Lone Duck and Homebody Duck top tens, Tim remains cricketing royalty in this particular honours system, sharing his "Quacking Together" plaque with old teammate Jim Hall. Fittingly, on this very calendar day back in 1978, Brian Woodcock (1976–1978, 4 career ducks) was also nodding his way back to the pavilion, against Leigh CC. And for the genealogists among us, the Thirkell name is practically a duck dynasty in its own right — with father, siblings and cousins all carrying career tallies of their own — though none of them troubled the umpires this week. Sunday 12 June — Sunday 2nd XI v Staplehurst CC Chris Newman was bowled by Chris Curran at number 4, his 3rd duck of the season and 5th in a still-fledgling 22-innings career — rank 140 of 1311 and climbing fast at that rate. No honours board entries to his name just yet, but the ink is barely dry. Curiously, on this same date in 1999, Stewart Morrison was performing an identical vanishing act against Horsmonden CC — a Debutante Duck club member and Duck of the Year in 2000, proof that history has a habit of quacking on a loop. Chris's own family connection sits quietly in reserve too — a relative on 16 career ducks — should the bloodline ever fancy sharing the stage. No pairs, no king pairs, and no family ducks to report this week — the ducks, for once, kept themselves to themselves. Week in summary Two ducks from five matches is a positively abstemious return by Duck Club standards — perhaps the bowlers were on their holidays too. Still, with the season only warming up, nobody should get too comfortable. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Christopher Thirkell — 5 ducks in 11 innings (45.45%) - Chris Newman — 3 ducks in 8 innings (37.50%) - Richard Piper — 3 ducks in 12 innings (25.00%) - Gareth Davies — 2 ducks in 6 innings (33.33%) - Tim Thirkell — 2 ducks in 7 innings (28.57%) Christopher Thirkell leads the chase by some distance, but the season's young yet. Next fixture, same duck-shaped opportunity — see you at the crease. 🦆🏏0️⃣

Four fixtures, four visits to the exclusive zero club this week. The art of not scoring remains alive and well at Linton Park. Saturday 4th June 🏏 1st XI v Meopham CC Russell Baldwin fell lbw to N Richardson without disturbing the scorebook — his 2nd duck of the season and 16th of a career now running to 173 innings, good enough for 64th on the all-time list of 1,311. On this very day in 1981, Malcolm Pay was doing precisely the same thing against YMCA Maidstone, one of 26 career ducks racked up between 1965 and 1992. 🏏 2nd XI v Eynsford CC (away) Simon Thirkell, caught and bowled by Ian Pound at number five, brought up his 1st duck of the season but a weighty 49th for his career — 10th on the all-time chart of 1,311, a fully paid-up member of the 50 Before a 50 club, and a two-time Duck of the Year champion (1983 and 2001). The Thirkell name is practically dynastic in these parts, with siblings, parents and children between them stacking well over 250 combined career noughts. Fittingly, he too shares his day with Malcolm Pay's 1981 vintage against YMCA Maidstone. Dave Todd, run out for nought at number ten, notched his 1st duck of the season and 17th overall from 223 innings, ranking 58th of 1,311. A busy day for the historical record too — Todd joins Baldwin and Thirkell in echoing Malcolm Pay's 1981 duck against YMCA Maidstone. Three Linton men, one ghost from 1981. Sunday 5th June 🏏 Sunday 2nd XI v Leybourne CC (away) Chris Newman, bowled by Tom Smith at four, collected his 2nd duck of the season, moving to 4 career ducks from just 21 innings — rank 160 of 1,311 and an account still very much under construction. A chip off the old block: father Clive Newman already carries 16 career ducks of his own, so the apple hasn't fallen far. On this day in 1993, Chris Tymms made a duck against Rumwood CC, one of 7 in a career spanning 1993 to 1997. Week in Summary Four matches, four ducks, and remarkably all four fell across just two fixtures — Eynsford CC alone accounted for half the tally. One fixture, mercifully or suspiciously, escaped entirely unscathed. No pairs, no families, no king ducks this week — just steady, honest attrition. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 5 ducks in 9 innings (55.56%) 2. Richard Piper — 3 ducks in 9 innings (33.33%) 3. Gareth Davies — 2 ducks in 6 innings (33.33%) 4. Chris Newman — 2 ducks in 7 innings (28.57%) 5. Russell Baldwin — 2 ducks in 11 innings (18.18%) Christopher Thirkell sets a blistering pace at over 50%, but there's a long summer left for the chasing pack to close the gap. 🍩 Next fixture looms, and with it, fresh opportunity for the willow to fail spectacularly. Same time, same crease, same dubious glory. See you there. 0️⃣🦆

A blustery Spring Bank Holiday weekend at Linton Park served up five fixtures and six fresh entries to the exclusive zero club, with one match mercifully escaping unscathed. Grab a shell, settle in. Saturday 28th - 1st XI v Sheldwich CC Ron Brown enjoyed himself with the ball, claiming a brace for the ages. Kevin Presneill (5) went lbw for his 7th career duck (120th all-time, 61 innings), joining Bert Buckoke on that tally, who made his own duck on this very date back in 1928 against Bearsted CC, en route to a 1928-1953 career and Duck of the Year honours in both '28 and '50. Moments later Dennis Salisbury (9) fell to that same Ron Brown, also his 7th career nought (116th all-time from 37 innings), keeping Kevin company on the day's honours and matching Buckoke's tally to the very date. Sunday 29th - 2nd XI v Minster (Sheppey) CC Opener Christopher Thirkell departed for nought, bowled Paul Constable, his 4th duck of the season and 17th of a growing career (55th all-time). On this very day in 1993, Piers McDonald did likewise against Milstead, one of the entries on his way to 48 career ducks and two Duck of the Year titles. Christopher, current holder of the Duck of the Year 2005 crown and a Full House nearly-man (ducked in 10 of 11 positions, just the one left to fill), wasn't finished yet. Monday 30th - 1st XI v Yalding CC Darren Styles bowled a beauty of a spell, removing openers Graham Walker (c Shrimpton, 1) and Christopher Thirkell (c Innes, 3) in the same innings. For Graham it was a landmark of the wrong kind, his maiden career duck from 43 innings, joining Paul Gibson, who made his own on this date in 1993 against Underriver on the way to 27 career ducks and a Platinum Duck board. For Christopher it completed a grim weekend double, a pair across the long weekend, no king pair thankfully, taking him to 5 ducks for the season and 18 for his career (still 55th all-time) and stretching his lead at the top of this year's race. A chip off the old block too, the Thirkell name already dominates the honours board several times over. Spare a thought for Darren Styles himself, two wickets to his name at Yalding and one duck of his own already this season. Poacher and gamekeeper in the same whites. Tuesday 31st - Twenty20 v Rumwood CC Ian Hollingworth fell lbw for nought in the shortest format, his 1st duck of the season and 2nd of his career (275th all-time from just 7 innings). On this day in 1969, Benny Bell made his own against Tovil, one of 30 career ducks across a 1966-1975 stint. Week in Summary Six ducks from five matches, with Christopher Thirkell alone responsible for a third of them. Ron Brown and Darren Styles share the bowling honours, each claiming a brace of victims. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Christopher Thirkell - 9 inns, 5 ducks (55.6%) - Richard Piper - 8 inns, 3 ducks (37.5%) - Gareth Davies - 6 inns, 2 ducks (33.3%) - Roger Burgess - 1 inn, 1 duck (100%) - Darren Styles - 2 inns, 1 duck (50%) Roll on next weekend. The zero club never sleeps, and somebody out there is overdue a fresh entry to the ledger. 🍩🦆

Four fixtures out on the road this weekend, and the exclusive zero club opened its books five times. A quieter harvest than some, but quality over quantity, as ever. 🏏 Saturday — 2nd XI at Mersham Sports CC Christopher Thirkell continued his early-season monopoly on nought, run out for his 3rd duck of the campaign, which keeps him handily perched atop the current Duck of the Year 2005 standings. It's also his 16th career duck in 98 innings, ranking 59th of 1311 all time, and puts him among the Full House nearly-men, having now ducked at 10 of the 11 batting positions. A name that needs no introduction round these parts either — the wider Thirkell clan between them carry the best part of two centuries of career noughts, so consistency of this particular kind clearly runs in the blood. On this very day back in 1956, John --'s Taylor was doing precisely the same thing against Marden CC, Kent — Christopher has history for company. Joe Martin followed him back to the pavilion, bowled by Tony Adams for his 2nd career duck in just 7 innings, his 1st of the season. Joe already holds his Debutante Duck badge from way back, arriving at the club with a nought and never quite shaking the habit. He too shares this day with 1956's John --'s Taylor of Marden CC — a popular date for noughts, it seems. 🌱 Sunday — 2nd XI at Sissinghurst CC Three ducks in one innings away at Sissinghurst — proper harvest weather. Ollie Howarth opened and didn't last long, caught by Oliver Kelly off Peter Masters for his maiden career duck from 5 innings. On this same day in 1999, Dave Charlton was doing likewise against Staplehurst CC — Ollie now shares that particular corner of history. Roger Burgess made his senior debut and, with a certain dramatic flair, made it a debut duck too, caught by Stephen Brown off Ian Wicks in his first innings for the club. That's instant, unimpeachable membership of the Debutante Duck club and the 2005 One and Done honours, whether or not he ever troubles either list again. He shares the 1999 Staplehurst parallel with Ollie. Darren Styles rounded things off, caught by Peter Masters off Trevor Wright, his 8th career duck from 150 innings and 1st of the season, ranking 101st of 1311 all time. Same day, same Dave Charlton parallel — 1999 was evidently a vintage year for noughts too. 📊 Week in Brief Five ducks from four fixtures, both coming from the 2nd XI's two outings while the rest of the club kept a clean sheet. Sissinghurst alone accounted for three of the five — a proper cluster. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Christopher Thirkell — 6 innings, 3 ducks, 50% 2. Richard Piper — 8 innings, 3 ducks, 37.5% 3. Gareth Davies — 5 innings, 2 ducks, 40% 4. Roger Burgess — 1 innings, 1 duck, 100% 5. Darren Styles — 2 innings, 1 duck, 50% Roger arrives at the summit with a perfect record on debut — early days, but the purest form of consistency there is. Next weekend's fixtures await. The zero club never sleeps. 🦆🍩0️⃣

Four matches, six ducks, and the Thirkell name doing rather a lot of the heavy lifting this week. The exclusive zero club has been busy indeed. Saturday 14th — 1st XI v Staplehurst CC (home) Russell Baldwin opened the innings and the account for the weekend, bowled by Tim Watts without scoring. His 1st duck of the season and 15th of an accomplished career (167 innings, 66th all-time of 1,309) — and on this very day back in 1978, Allan Cooper was doing much the same against High Halstow CC, en route to 38 career ducks and 20th spot in the all-time table. Saturday 14th — 2nd XI v Rumwood CC (away) A proper Thirkell occasion at Rumwood, and spookily all three duckers here share Baldwin's exact historical echo, each falling on the anniversary of Allan Cooper's own 1978 duck against High Halstow CC. Christopher Thirkell fell to James Longhurst for his 2nd duck of the season and 15th of his career (96 innings, 63rd all-time) — and with it takes an early grip on the 2005 Duck of the Year race, a title very much his to lose. Fellow Thirkell Tim was bowled by C. Perrett for his 1st of the season but a mighty 77th of a career now sitting 3rd all-time of 1,309, a past Duck of the Year (1972) whose Full House board entry means he's now ducked at every position from 1 to 11 — a full set. Gareth Davies completed the rout, also falling to C. Perrett, his 2nd duck of the season and 3rd of a young career (10 innings, 199th all-time). Two Thirkells down in the same innings — a bona fide Family of Ducks, proof the zero gene runs strong in that bloodline. Sunday 15th — 2nd XI v Wingham CC (away) Wingham claimed two more. M Townsend was caught behind off Phil Greenstead for his 1st senior duck (2 innings, 513th all-time) — on this day in 1968, Fred Greenfield suffered identically against Reeds CC on his way to 23 career ducks. Ian Brattle followed, caught off Lee Ketcher, his 1st of the season but 47th of a storied career (145 innings, 13th all-time) — a paid-up Debutante Duck club member, stretching his Ducks in a Row streak to 7 consecutive and edging towards the 50 Before a 50 landmark. Brother Paul Brattle sits on 26 career ducks of his own — evidently a family trait, though not one shared in the same match this time. The Week in Numbers Six ducks from four matches, with Rumwood alone contributing half the tally. A pleasing spread of methods too — three bowled, three caught — nobody troubled by anything they weren't already troubled by. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Richard Piper — 3 ducks, 7 innings (43%) - Christopher Thirkell — 2 ducks, 4 innings (50%) - Gareth Davies — 2 ducks, 4 innings (50%) - Ian Brattle — 1 duck, 2 innings (50%) - M Townsend — 1 duck, 2 innings (50%) Christopher Thirkell heads the chasing pack and the Duck of the Year race is wide open. Next fixture looms — who's brave enough to keep the tally ticking? 🍩0️⃣🦆

Four fixtures on the board this weekend, and the Duck Club logged three fresh entries - modest by Linton standards, but one of them was a proper occasion. 🏏 Saturday 7 May — 1st XI v Rodmersham CC (h) Brian Piper departed at number four, caught Christian Marsh off Colin Mason - his 1st duck of the season and the 22nd of a long career, good enough for 48th on the all-time list out of 1309. That parks him alongside Alan Wilkes (1953–1978) and Peter Whyte (1987–2004), both also sitting on exactly 22. On this very day back in 1978, Malcolm Pay (1965–1992) was making the same walk against Biddenden CC. One place below, Richard Piper followed him straight back in, also caught Christian Marsh, this time off Darren Nokes. It's his 3rd duck of the season already and the 39th of a career spanning 253 innings, lifting him to a rarefied 19th on the all-time board. Richard is a fully paid-up member of the Full House club (a duck at every position, 1 to 11), sits in the Homebody and Lone Duck top tens, and was Duck of the Year in 2003 - so today was very much on brand. And yes - 1978 again: Malcolm Pay once more, same date, same fate, against Biddenden CC. 🦆👨‍👦 Which brings us to the day's headline act. Brian and Richard Piper - a parent and child - both walked back for nought in the very same innings against Rodmersham. A genuine Duck and Ducklings entry for the honours board, and not the easiest thing to arrange on purpose. 🏏 Saturday 7 May — 2nd XI v West Farleigh CC (a) Away at West Farleigh, Gareth Davies flew solo for the 2nd XI, caught Steven Bicker off Colin Fry at number seven. It's his 1st duck of the season and just his 2nd in nine innings for the club, ranking 265th of 1309 - level company with Andrew Hales (1976–1998) and Arthur Ash (1934–1941), among others camped on a tidy 2. Small world department: Malcolm Pay struck again on this same date in 1978, also against Biddenden CC. 📋 Week in Summary Four matches, three ducks, one shared family ceremony. No golden ducks recorded this week - every departure came after at least a ball survived, so credit where it's due for effort, however brief. The Pipers' joint effort remains the standout - the rarest thing this club offers is misfortune shared by blood. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Richard Piper — 4 innings, 3 ducks, 75.0% 2. Brian Piper — 2 innings, 1 duck, 50.0% 3. Chris Newman — 2 innings, 1 duck, 50.0% 4. Christopher Thirkell — 2 innings, 1 duck, 50.0% 5. Gareth Davies — 3 innings, 1 duck, 33.33% Richard Piper sets the early pace and the Pipers now occupy two of the top two spots between them - a family monopoly on futility. Plenty of season left for the chasing pack to make their move. 0️⃣ Next fixture, next chance. The bowlers will be waiting - who fancies joining the club this week?

Early season, and the zero club is already stirring. Four matches over the weekend produced a modest but perfectly formed three ducks — enough to keep the honours boards ticking nicely as the new campaign gets under way. 2nd XI — away at Bidborough CC Richard Piper, at number 3, fell to Reichel for nought — his 2nd duck of this fledgling season and 38th of an already storied career, good enough for 21st of 1307 in the all-time table. Richard carries the Duck of the Year 2003 crown, is a fully certified Full House member (out for a duck in every position 1 to 11 — a completeness as thorough as it is unwanted), and features in both the Homebody Duck and Ducks on the Road top tens. A club man through and through, with father Brian (21 career ducks) and brother James (3) also on the books. On this very day in 1955, John --'s Taylor (1949–1960, 15 ducks, 63rd all time) was performing the identical ceremony against West Farleigh CC — some traditions span half a century. Sunday 1st XI — home to AA Gravesend CC Christopher Thirkell, at number 2, was bowled by X Adnan for his 1st duck of the season and 14th of his career, slotting in at 66th of 1307 all time. He's already a Duck of the Year 2005 contender and sits agonisingly one short of Full House membership at 10 of 11 positions. The Thirkell name is practically its own wing of the Duck Club museum — John (90), Tim (76), Nigel (57), father Simon (48), Daniel (20), brother Tom (1) and Stuart (1) all keeping the family duck pond well stocked. On this day in 1965, Fred Greenfield (1964–1981, 23 ducks, later a Retirement Duck himself) was doing much the same against Staplehurst CC. Sunday 2nd XI — away at Leigh CC, Kent Chris Newman, at number 5, went for nought to Kenny Ramsammy — his 1st duck of the season, taking him to 3 career ducks from just 15 innings, 188th of 1307 all time. A career still finding its feet in the art of not scoring, though father Clive Newman (16 career ducks) shows the family pedigree is sound. Chris keeps company with Fred Greenfield's 1965 vintage against Staplehurst CC on this same calendar date — the fixture list, it seems, enjoys a good echo. The week in brief Three ducks from four matches — a gentle opening skirmish rather than a full assault, but the season is young and the zero club never stays quiet for long. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 1. Richard Piper — 2 ducks from 3 innings (67%) 2. Christopher Thirkell — 1 duck from 2 innings (50%) 3. Chris Newman — 1 duck from 1 innings (100%) The board is wide open this early in the season. Next fixture, someone will surely add their name to it — the correspondent, as ever, will be watching closely. 🦆

A quiet weekend on the poultry front, but what the Duck Club lacked in volume it made up for in pedigree — a single nought, delivered by one of the club's most distinguished repeat offenders. 🏏 Saturday 23rd April — 1st XI v Wilmington CC Richard Piper, promoted to first drop, departed cheaply — bowled by Kevin Saunders — to record the solitary duck of the period. It's his 1st of the 2005 campaign but his 37th in senior colours, a tally built across 250 innings that plants him a lofty 21st of 1305 in the all-time Linton Park standings. Richard is no stranger to ceremony down here: a Duck of the Year winner in 2003, a fixture of the Ducks on the Road and Homebody Duck top tens home and away alike, and — the rarest feather in any collector's cap — a fully paid-up member of the Full House club, having now recorded a duck in every position from 1 to 11. There isn't a spot in the order safe from him. Neatly, this duck arrives on the anniversary of another — on this very day in 1994, Simon Thirkell (1980–2004) also strolled back for nought, against Hollingbourne CC of all sides. Thirkell finished his career on 48 ducks, good for 11th all-time, a two-time Duck of the Year (1983 and 2001) and a veteran of both the Tourist Duck and Ducks on the Road top tens — respectable company for Richard to be keeping on the calendar, even if he's still 11 shy of catching him. No other side troubled the scorers this weekend — both Saturday's and Sunday's remaining fixtures passed off entirely duck-free, a rare bout of collective competence the club will not be dwelling on for long. 📊 Week in Summary Just the one duck from two matches — the ducks, it seems, largely evaded capture this week. Consistency of a very particular kind was in short supply, though Richard Piper's solo effort was enough to open this season's account in style. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Richard Piper — 1 innings, 1 duck, 100% Early days yet, and Richard sets the early pace almost by default — plenty of season left for the chasing pack to make their move. Next fixture, next opportunity. The ducks will be back — they always are. 🦆🍩