🦆 The Duck Pond

One match ventured out onto the field this week, and — remarkably, suspiciously, almost insultingly — not a single duck was laid to rest. The zero club, for once, recorded a zero of its own. Eleven bats went out, eleven bats presumably troubled the scorer in some fashion, and the honours board gathers dust for another week. Whether this represents a genuine outbreak of competence or merely a temporary ceasefire in hostilities between bat and ball, the Duck Club cannot say. We can only report what the scorebook tells us, and this week the scorebook is disappointingly free of fowl. Do not despair. The art of not scoring is a skill honed over generations at Linton Park, and it does not simply vanish because of one clean sheet. Normal service — and by "normal" we mean "abnormal, in the very best way" — will surely resume before long. 🍩 A quiet week for the ignominious. Make of that what you will. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🏏 - 🥇 Ross Brice — 6 ducks in 15 innings, a startling 40.0% strike rate for failure - 🥈 Allan Cooper — 5 ducks in 20 innings, 25.0% - 🥉 Jim Hall — 4 ducks in 24 innings, 16.67% - 4️⃣ Mike Iliffe — 3 ducks in 11 innings, 27.27% - 5️⃣ Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks in 14 innings, 21.43% Ross Brice sits proudly atop the pile with two ducks in every five visits to the crease — a consistency of a very particular kind, and one that separates the merely unlucky from the truly committed. The chasing pack will need to pull their fingers out, and their bats in, if they hope to catch him before the season closes. 0️⃣ Until the next time willow meets leather and somebody's stumps meet the same, keep your eyes on the middle and your bat nowhere near the ball. The Duck Club never sleeps for long.

🏏 1st XI v Lordswood CC (h) A single fixture on the books this week, but Lordswood CC made sure it counted — three additions to the ledger inside one Linton Park innings. Paul Bowles opened the batting and, true to a well-worn habit, opened the account of ducks too — caught Colin Gardener, bowled V. Corbin. It's his 3rd of the season and the 32nd of an extraordinary career spanning 394 innings, keeping him a lofty 14th in the all-time standings of 980. A two-time Duck of the Year (1966 and 1968), a fixture of the Ducks on the Road top 10, and one half of the Only Two Quacks pairing with Adam Pooley, Paul scarcely needs introducing to this column anymore. Fittingly, on this very date back in 1973, club stalwart Nigel Thirkell was doing much the same against Bexhill CC — some anniversaries keep quacking back. At number five, Don Fermor introduced himself to senior cricket in the most Duck Club way imaginable — caught Andy Coltham, bowled Kevin Masters, first innings, first duck. A debut nought is no small thing: it earns immediate, lifelong membership of the Debutante Duck club, that select order whose very first act at the crease was to depart without scoring. Welcome, Don — 1 from 1 already slots you in at 292nd on the all-time list, with a flawless 100% record you'll be quietly hoping not to maintain. As it happens, Nigel Thirkell was on identical date-in-history duty back in 1973 too. Rounding out the innings, Mike Iliffe fell for nought at number eight, caught Colin Gardener again, this time off Henderson Carrington. It's Mike's 3rd duck of the season and 40th of his career from 261 innings, good enough for 7th on the all-time list — rarefied poultry company indeed. He isn't carrying the torch alone either: son David Iliffe already has 4 career ducks of his own, a fine family tradition quietly taking shape. And yes, once more, 29 September 1973 saw Nigel Thirkell doing exactly this. Week in Summary Three ducks, one match, and Colin Gardener rather enjoying himself in the field — two of Saturday's three victims fell into his hands. A tidy, efficient afternoon's work for the Lordswood attack, and a productive one for the Duck Club ledger. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Ross Brice — 6 ducks / 15 innings (40.0%) 2. Allan Cooper — 5 ducks / 20 innings (25.0%) 3. Jim Hall — 4 ducks / 24 innings (16.67%) 4. Mike Iliffe — 3 ducks / 10 innings (30.0%) 5. Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks / 14 innings (21.43%) Mike's afternoon at Lordswood keeps him firmly inside the top five and breathing down Jim Hall's neck for the podium. That's the lot from this outing — the season presses on, the runs remain optional, and the next fixture promises fresh opportunities for the art of not scoring. See you at the crease 🦆🏏0️⃣

A rare and faintly troubling turn of events at Linton Park this weekend: two matches played, eleven wickets and more falling in the ordinary course of things, and not a single naught to show for it. 🏏 The Duck Club's scouts were out in force across both fixtures and returned, disappointingly, empty-handed. Every batsman who walked to the crease found his way off the mark before walking back — a state of affairs the committee views with some suspicion. Whether this represents a genuine outbreak of competence or simply a temporary drought in the art of not scoring, only next weekend will tell. Rest assured, normal service is expected to resume shortly. The zero club does not take kindly to being kept waiting, and with the season drawing towards its close there remains plenty of time for the standings below to be shuffled once more. 0️⃣ Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard — 1979 0️⃣ 🥇 Ross Brice — 6 ducks from 15 innings (40.0%) — a formidable rate that puts real daylight between him and the chasing pack 🥈 Allan Cooper — 5 from 20 (25.0%) 🥉 Jim Hall — 4 from 23 (17.39%) 4️⃣ Fred Greenfield — 3 from 14 (21.43%) 5️⃣ Trevor Back — 3 from 16 (18.75%) Ross Brice sits handsomely clear at the summit with the season entering its final weeks, though at a 40% strike rate for noughts he'll want to watch his back — nobody wants to be caught napping this close to the finish line, least of all by the very thing that got him there. So there it is — a quiet weekend for the Duck Club, but a quiet weekend only ever means the ducks are gathering strength for the next one. Get out there next fixture and give the honours board something to talk about. 🍩🦆

A modest haul from the closing weeks of the '79 campaign, but a modest haul in the Duck Club is still a haul worth toasting. Two additions to the ledger this week, both from the 1st XI, both worth a moment's ceremony. 1st XI Saturday 15th at home to Southborough CC, and Malcolm Pay came in at first drop only to depart bowled by Paul Rickwood. It's his 2nd duck of the season and his 11th career nought from 88 innings, keeping him steady at 46th of 979 in the all-time table. Curiously, this fixture has previous — on this very day in 1973, Mike Iliffe also strolled back for nought against Southborough CC, one of 39 ducks across a 1966 to 1979 career that still holds him 8th of all time. Some grounds simply have a taste for it. A nod too to Malcolm's brother Colin Pay, a fellow member of the club's books with a duck to his own name. The following day, away to Mersham Le Hatch CC, Jim Hall was caught off M Epps at number six for his 4th duck of the season and, remarkably, his 43rd career addition from 240 innings — good enough for 4th of 979 all time, a rarefied position occupied by very few in club history. Jim is a paid-up Debutante Duck too, his very first senior innings decades ago having yielded a nought, and he sits agonisingly on the Full House nearly-man board, having ducked in 10 of the 11 batting positions across his career. Twice a Duck of the Year champion, in 1970 and 1977, he's clearly not finished chasing the title. And the calendar struck again — on this same day in 1962, Richard Ashby also made a duck, against Staplehurst CC, one of 24 in a 1962 to 1979 career that ranks 25th all time. A third fixture in the period passed without incident for the ducking classes, everyone getting off the mark, dull as that is for this newsletter. Week in summary Two ducks from three matches, both falling in the top or middle order, both this week's victims already deep into three-figure innings counts — proof that seniority is no protection against the art of not scoring. Consistency, as ever, of a very particular kind. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 Ross Brice — 6 ducks from 15 innings (40.0%) 🥈 Allan Cooper — 5 ducks from 19 innings (26.32%) 🥉 Jim Hall — 4 ducks from 22 innings (18.18%) 4. Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks from 14 innings (21.43%) 5. Trevor Back — 3 ducks from 16 innings (18.75%) Ross Brice sits well clear at the top with the season drawing toward its close, but Jim Hall's fresh addition keeps him firmly in the frame. The next fixture will no doubt add its own names to the honours board — until then, quack on.

Two fixtures went into the book this weekend, and for once the exclusive zero club has nothing to report. Not a single nought fell across either match — every batsman who walked to the crease at Linton Park duly troubled the scorers, however modestly. A quiet weekend for the art of not scoring, and a rare one: the ducks, it seems, took the weekend off along with everybody else. It won't last. It never does. 🏏 The Weekend That Wasn't Both sides came home with their dignity, and their nought column, entirely intact. No golden ducks, no pairs, no family affairs at the crease — just runs, glorious ordinary runs, scored by everyone who had a go. The Duck Club's honours board gathers dust for another few days. Spare a thought, though, for the season's front-runners below, who must be almost disappointed not to have extended their leads. Their moment will come again soon enough — early September has a way of being generous to the collection. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Ross Brice — 6 ducks from 14 innings (42.86%) — a scarcely believable strike rate, and the man to catch as the season winds toward its close - Allan Cooper — 5 ducks from 19 innings (26.32%) — quietly consistent in the very worst sense - Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks from 13 innings (23.08%) - Trevor Back — 3 ducks from 15 innings (20.0%) - Jim Hall — 3 ducks from 20 innings (15.0%) — proof that patience and poultry can coexist 📅 Looking Ahead Ross Brice sits well clear at the top with 1979 drawing to a close, but a nervy tail can undo a season's work in a single afternoon, and the rest of the pack will fancy their chances of a late flurry. The Duck Club never sleeps for long — normal service, we trust, resumes at the very next fixture. Until then: bat carefully, or don't. We'll be watching either way. 🦆

The 1st XI stayed home while the rest of the touring party set off for Cornwall this week, and between them they found five fresh entries for the club's exclusive zero club. A quiet week in volume, but not in quality — read on. 🏏 Saturday 2nd — 1st XI away at Staplehurst CC Trevor Back, promoted to four, was bowled by Anthony West without troubling the scorers — his 3rd duck of the season and 12th of a fine 77-innings career, good enough for 44th in the all-time table. A paid-up member of the Ducks on the Road, Homebody Duck and Lone Duck top tens, Trevor could at least take comfort in company: on this very day in 1968, Paul Bowles was doing much the same thing against Bearsted CC. Bowles, as it happens, hasn't finished with this report yet. Nine wickets later, Allan Cooper joined him in the book, stumped by B- Penny off Q Haywood for his 5th duck of the season and 22nd of his career (125 innings, 28th all time). Trevor and Allan share an Only Two Quacks honour between them, so today's joint effort was really just business as usual. Allan also holds that same distinction with Jim Hall — who, fittingly, would be finding his own way back to the pavilion in Cornwall before the week was out. ⛵ The Cornwall Tour Wednesday saw the tourists at Penryn St Gluvias CC. John Hartridge fell lbw to T- Miles at first drop for his maiden season duck, an early instalment in what is so far a modest 8-innings career (360th all time). On this same day in 1970, David T Lowen was making his own contribution against A. Trembeths. Also departing cheaply at Penryn was the very Paul Bowles trailed earlier — caught off an unnamed fielder, bowled Cyril Hancock, for his 2nd duck of the season and 31st of a mighty 389-innings career, 14th in the all-time standings. A two-time Duck of the Year (1966 and 1968) and a fixture of the Ducks on the Road top ten, Bowles remains one of the club's great servants of the zero. Sunday's fixture against Troon CC brought Jim Hall's turn, bowled by P Johns for his 3rd duck of the season and 42nd of his career — 4th on the all-time list, and agonisingly one position short of the fabled Full House (a duck at all eleven positions). Jim's honours board reads like a small pamphlet, but the relevant line today is Quacking Together (with Tim Thirkell) — Tim himself made a duck on this exact day back in 1977, against St Just CC, and returns the compliment on his own board. 📋 Week in Summary Five ducks from five matches, home and away, with the touring party doing the heavier lifting. No golden ducks, no repeat offenders and no family affairs this week — a rare week of restraint from the Duck Club. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Ross Brice — 6 ducks in 13 innings (46.15%) - Allan Cooper — 5 ducks in 18 innings (27.78%) - Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks in 12 innings (25.0%) - Trevor Back — 3 ducks in 15 innings (20.0%) - Jim Hall — 3 ducks in 20 innings (15.0%) Ross Brice sits pretty at the top, but with the season drawing on there's still time for the also-rans to make their move. Next fixture, same invitation as always: bat first, ask questions later. 🍩0️⃣🦆

Four fixtures, four ducks, and Old Anchorians CC contrived to bag a brace of them in the very same innings. A tidy little week for the exclusive zero club. Sunday 26th August — 1st XI v Old Anchorians CC (home) Tim Thirkell went first, caught I- Barratt bowled C- Daniels, for his 2nd duck of the season and 41st of an already gilded career — 6th on the all-time list of 975. Tim's name already adorns the Full House board (a duck at every position, 1 to 11), sits in the Homebody and Lone Duck top tens, and rounds out the Ducks on the Road roster besides — ignominy at home and away alike. The Thirkell name is already the most decorated in the club's zero-ledger courtesy of kinsman John Thirkell's outright record 90, with siblings Nigel (27) and Stuart (1) chipping in behind. On this very day back in 1962, club great John Ames — 49 ducks across 1952–1978, 2nd all-time — was also strolling back for nought, against Sevenoaks Vine CC. Not to be outdone, Fred Greenfield followed him back moments later, bowled by the very same C- Daniels, for his 3rd duck of the season and 22nd of his career — 28th all-time. Fred is a paid-up member of the Retirement Duck club from a past farewell innings, no danger of that repeating itself this week, we trust. Fittingly, the same 1962 date also claimed John Ames, so Fred keeps distinguished company on the calendar. Monday 27th August — 1st XI v Bearsted CC (away) Jim Hall departed caught Richard Campion, bowled Brian Burnett, for his 2nd duck of the season and 41st career — level with Tim Thirkell, and the pair already share more than a number, both inscribed on the Quacking Together board from an earlier shared quack. Jim's cabinet runs deep: Duck of the Year in both 1970 and 1977, a Full House nearly-man on 10 of 11 positions, and entries on the Tourist and Homebody Duck top tens alike. On this day in 1949, Richard Harris (36 ducks, 1940–1970) was also given his marching orders, against Hunton Wanderers CC. Wednesday 29th August — Midweek XI v Gravesend CC (away) David Iliffe was trapped lbw by Richard Walker for his 2nd duck of the season, his career tally now a still-modest 4 in 14 innings — 107th all-time, with plenty of climbing left in him. He shares a surname, if not yet a scoreline, with kinsman Mike Iliffe, already 39 to the good. On this day in 1954, Stan Wratten (34 ducks, 1943–1979) was also adding to the archive, against D Hambrook XI. Week in Summary Four matches, four ducks, Old Anchorians doing the damage twice in one innings. No pairs, no king pairs, no family affairs this week — just honest, solitary failure, exactly as the club likes it. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Ross Brice — 6 ducks in 12 innings (50.0%) 2. Allan Cooper — 4 ducks in 14 innings (28.6%) 3. Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks in 10 innings (30.0%) 4. Paul Brattle — 3 ducks in 23 innings (13.0%) 5. Jon Harris — 3 ducks in 26 innings (11.5%) Ross Brice sits imperious atop the standings at a barely believable one duck every other innings — a strike rate for failure the rest of the club can only aspire to. The next fixture looms, and with it fresh opportunity for the zero club to welcome new, or returning, members. We watch. We wait. We celebrate. 🦆

Three fixtures on the fixture card this week, but the Duck Club only needed one of them to do its grim work. Bobbing Court CC came to Linton Park on Saturday 18th and helped themselves to four scalps in a single innings — a proper collective collapse, and not one of them made it off nought. 🏏 1st XI v Bobbing Court CC (home) Malcolm Pay went first, run out for a dismissal officially logged as "Unsure" — which rather sums up the whole session. It's his 10th career duck from 84 innings, good enough for 54th of 975 all-time, a list on which his own sibling Colin Pay also has a quiet one-duck entry. Curiously, this very calendar date in 1963 saw club legend John Thirkell — the all-time duck king on 90 — also trudge off for nought, against The Mote CC. History repeats itself in the cruellest ways. C- Phillips followed, bowled by Roger Mills, and opened his own account in the zero column — his 1st career duck from just 3 innings, debuting at 275th of 975. Welcome to the fraternity, such as it is. He too falls under the shadow of Thirkell's 1963 duck on this same date. Stan Wratten was next, caught by W Webb off Roy Weller for his 34th career duck, a tally that plants him a lofty 12th of 975 after 350 innings of service. Stan remains a proud member of the "Quacking Together" honours board, forever paired with the great John Ames — and, like his teammates, shares today's date with Thirkell's 1963 effort. Ross Brice completed the rout, bowled by Roy Weller for his 6th duck of the season and 6th of his career, all from a mere 13 innings — an eye-watering strike rate. This keeps him firmly out in front for Duck of the Year 1979, a crown he currently wears with some conviction. Bobbing Court's attack may as well ask for a cut of the royalties. 📅 The Rest of the Week Sunday and the midweek fixture were, sadly, entirely fowl-free — vegan affairs from start to finish. Bobbing Court evidently took their harvest early and called it a week's work. 📊 Week in Summary 4 ducks from 3 matches, every single one landing in the same innings against the same opposition. A middle order that simply vanished — positions 4, 5, 6 and 8 all back in the shed without troubling the scorers. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Ross Brice — 12 innings, 6 ducks, 50.0% - Allan Cooper — 13 innings, 4 ducks, 30.77% - Paul Brattle — 21 innings, 3 ducks, 14.29% - Jon Harris — 26 innings, 3 ducks, 11.54% - A Donovan — 2 innings, 2 ducks, 100.0% Ross Brice sits well clear at the summit, but there's plenty of season left for a challenger to emerge. Get yourselves down to the ground next weekend — the zero club is always recruiting 🦆🍩0️⃣

Two matches on the fixture list this weekend, and Headcorn CC did the honours for both entries in the book. A lean harvest by Linton standards, but quality over quantity, as ever in this particular field. 🏏 Saturday — Headcorn CC, Home The top order held firm, but the middle and tail found the Headcorn attack rather more persuasive. David Buck departed at number six, bowled by Robert Westrop for a blank, his second duck of the campaign and 8th for his LPCC career from 44 innings — good enough for 64th on the all-time list of shame. He now sits shoulder to shoulder with a small platoon on exactly eight: Alan Tucker, Arthur Cradduck, Derry Evans, Eddie Lawrence, George Champion and Pat Hardwick all made their own eight-duck stands across various decades, so David joins a well-attended club meeting. A nice aside for the family scrapbook too — father William Buck already carries 30 career ducks of his own, so the art of not scoring is evidently hereditary at the Buck household. Ross Brice followed at nine, bowled Dave Harden, his 5th duck of the season and, remarkably, his 5th in only 11 career innings — a strike rate for failure that few will ever touch. That keeps him planted at 97th all-time and, with the season only fitfully underway, already wearing the Duck of the Year 1979 crown that the honours board has stamped in his name. Spookily, both dismissals fall on the very anniversary of 11 August 1973, when Nigel Thirkell (1969–1979, 27 career ducks, a fixture of the Homebody and Tourist Duck top tens) also trudged back against Headcorn CC without scoring. Some grounds simply seem to attract the affliction on this date. 📅 Sunday — Quiet on the Duck Front The second fixture of the weekend passed without incident for the Duck Club — no additions, no near misses worth reporting. Even the ducks need a rest day occasionally. 📊 Week in Summary Two ducks from two matches, both claimed inside the same innings at Headcorn — a matching pair of dismissals from a middle order that clearly fancied an early bath. Season tally ticks along nicely, and with Ross Brice already boasting a 50% duck rate for the summer, the race for the year's top ignominy looks all but decided. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Ross Brice — 10 innings, 5 ducks (50.0%) - Allan Cooper — 12 innings, 4 ducks (33.3%) - Paul Brattle — 20 innings, 3 ducks (15.0%) - Jon Harris — 24 innings, 3 ducks (12.5%) - A Donovan — 2 innings, 2 ducks (100.0%) A Donovan's perfect record deserves a special mention — flawless consistency of a very particular kind. 🍩 That's the lot for this round. The next fixture awaits, and with it, no doubt, fresh candidates queuing to bow before the Duck Club's exclusive zero club. See you all at the crease — briefly, if history is any guide. 0️⃣🏏

Three fixtures took to the field this week and, refreshingly for the willow, only one wicket fell to the great leveller. Quality control at Linton Park, or so we're told. 🏏 Midweek XI At home to Maidstone Police on the 8th, Paul Brattle came to the crease at number 5 and departed without troubling the scorers, bowled by Paul Kinnell. It's the 3rd duck of his season and the 25th of a long and storied career spanning 269 innings — enough to put him 23rd of 973 in the all-time standings, a rarefied stretch of the table reserved for the truly committed. Paul is, naturally, a paid-up member of the Debutante Duck club, having opened his Linton account with a nought on debut many years ago — a tradition he has since honoured with impressive regularity. It's a family affair in the duck stakes too: a parent-child link with Frank Brattle (38 career ducks), family ties to Percy Brattle (16), and sibling Ian Brattle (10) — the Brattle name is seldom far from the honours board, one branch or another. Spare a thought for the history books while we're at it: on this very day back in 1973, Brian Piper also made a duck, against Sennocke CC — proof that the 8th of August has form for unkindness to Linton batsmen, whatever the decade. 📅 Week in Summary Three matches, one duck — a curiously well-behaved week by Duck Club standards. Whether that's improving technique across the club or simply the ducks keeping their heads down for a few days, only next week will tell. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Ross Brice — 4 ducks in 9 innings (44.44%) 2. Allan Cooper — 4 ducks in 11 innings (36.36%) 3. Paul Brattle — 3 ducks in 18 innings (16.67%) 4. Jon Harris — 3 ducks in 22 innings (13.64%) 5. A Donovan — 2 ducks in 2 innings (100.00%) — a flawless start to a fledgling duck-collecting career Ross Brice leads the pack for now, but with the season in full swing there's plenty of cricket left for the standings to be rewritten. Roll on the next fixture — the ducks, no doubt, are already limbering up. 🦆

A short, sharp period on the calendar — just two matches, but Margate's bowlers made sure the Duck Club's books stayed busy. 🏏 Saturday 28th — Sibton Park CC (away), 1st XI Batting at 11, Clive Stacey introduced himself to Linton Park cricket in the purest way the club recognises — caught and bowled by Nick Guy without so much as unsettling the scorebook, and straight onto the Debutante Duck honours board for his trouble. A proper baptism. On this very date back in 1957, D- Jordan also made a duck, against Folkestone CC — the calendar, it seems, has been waiting for Clive all along. 🌙 Tuesday 31st — Margate CC (away), Midweek XI T- Bond ran through the middle order at Margate almost single-handedly, and the Duck Club had a field day. Ross Brice fell for his 4th of the season — a tally that also stands at 4 for his career from just 10 innings — and with a Duck of the Year 1979 board credit already to his name, he's installed as this year's man to catch. Paul Brattle followed for his 2nd of the season but a weighty 24th of his career, 24th of 972 all time — a proper Brattle family trait, with kin Frank (38 career ducks), Percy (16) and Ian (10) all long since inducted. Graham Cove notched a maiden LPCC duck, his 1st of the season from a still-tender 5 innings. Then the old hands took over: Jon Harris, sitting 4th of 972 in the all-time list with 41 career ducks and a Full House (a duck at every position 1 to 11) already to his name, added his 3rd of the season — in the company of Allan Cooper, his long-time "Only Two Quacks" partner in crime, who banked his own 4th of the season for 21 career ducks, 28th of 972. Closing the innings, D Carr made his senior debut and his first senior duck in the very same breath — bowled by S Kelly — and walks straight onto the Debutante Duck board alongside Clive. All six of Tuesday's Margate victims share good company down the years: on this same date in 1895, Ernest Cruttenden (1881–1963) also made a duck, against Headcorn CC. Some things simply repeat themselves. 📊 Week in Summary Seven ducks from two matches, five of them at Margate's door — a proper collapse for the Midweek XI, softened only by the honour of two new names joining the club outright. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Ross Brice — 4 ducks, 9 innings (44%) 2. Allan Cooper — 4 ducks, 11 innings (36%) 3. Jon Harris — 3 ducks, 21 innings (14%) 4. A Donovan — 2 ducks, 2 innings (100%) 5. Fred Greenfield — 2 ducks, 7 innings (29%) Brice and Cooper share the early running, but Donovan's flawless record from a mere two innings remains the purest statement of intent on the board. The season rolls on — who fancies adding their name next weekend? We watch, we wait, we celebrate. 🦆

A rare and frankly disappointing bulletin from the Duck Club this week: one match played, and not a single duck to show for it. The exclusive zero club held no induction ceremony, no honours board gained a new name, and the art of not scoring went entirely unpractised at Linton Park. Somewhere out there, eleven batsmen conspired to trouble the scorers on every single occasion. It happens. Even the most dedicated hunting ground has its quiet Saturdays, and 22 July 1979 will go down as one of them — a shutout for the strugglers, a triumph for competence, and a mild inconvenience for anyone hoping to update their tally this week. Do not despair. The season is young, the standings are fierce, and nought is never more than one loose shot away. Duck Hunting Season 1979 — Leaderboard - Ross Brice — 7 innings, 3 ducks, 42.86% — the early pace-setter, converting nearly one innings in two into a walk back for nothing. A masterclass in consistency of a very particular kind. - Allan Cooper — 10 innings, 3 ducks, 30.0% — matching Brice's tally across a longer campaign, proof that patience and persistence both have their place in this pursuit. - A Donovan — 2 innings, 2 ducks, 100.0% — a flawless record. Every single innings this season has ended in nought. Truly the purest form of the discipline, and one to watch closely for as long as the middle stump keeps finding him. - Fred Greenfield — 7 innings, 2 ducks, 28.57% — quietly building a case for the season's honours. - Mike Iliffe — 7 innings, 2 ducks, 28.57% — level with Greenfield stride for stride, the pair effectively sharing top billing for fifth spot. A donnish nod, too, to Donovan's rate — a century of failure is still a century, and this club celebrates every kind. 📅 Looking ahead The Duck Club will be watching next weekend's fixtures keenly. Somebody, somewhere, is due. Whether it's a fresh face joining the honours board, a milestone tally ticking over, or simply Donovan extending his perfect record, the ducks always come home to roost eventually. Until then — bat carefully, walk back slowly, and see you next weekend. 🍩0️⃣🏏

Three fixtures out on the park this week and, remarkably, the exclusive zero club's ledger shows just the one entry. A lean week by Duck Club standards — but as ever, quality over quantity. 🏏 1st XI v Sennocke CC Fred Greenfield flew the flag alone this week, coming in at number seven and departing without troubling the scorers—caught K Storey, bowled T Marsh. It's Fred's 2nd duck of the season and the 21st of a genuinely distinguished career spanning 135 innings, good enough for 28th on the all-time list of 969. Fred is also a long-standing name on the Retirement Duck board, having bowed out on a nought in a career finale long past—this week's effort is merely the latest instalment in an ongoing collection, not a repeat farewell. Neat symmetry on the calendar too: on this very day in 1978, club legend Tim Thirkell also made a duck, against Bowaters CC of all sides. Thirkell finished his career on 40 ducks, 7th on the all-time list, a Duck of the Year winner in 1972 and a fixture of the Full House and Lone Duck top tens. Fred keeps distinguished company. 📋 Week in Summary Three matches, one duck — the nets have come back rather empty this week. Whether the opposition were unusually generous or our top order uncharacteristically determined, the hunting season presses on regardless. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Ross Brice — 3 ducks in 7 innings (42.86%) 2. Allan Cooper — 3 ducks in 10 innings (30.00%) 3. A Donovan — 2 ducks in 2 innings (100.00%), a flawless record if not the kind anyone frames 4. Fred Greenfield — 2 ducks in 7 innings (28.57%) 5. Mike Iliffe — 2 ducks in 7 innings (28.57%) Slim pickings this week, but the season's young enough yet for the leaderboard to be turned on its head. Roll on the next fixture — the ducks always find a way back. 🥇🍩 0️⃣🦆

A quiet weekend in the exclusive zero club: two fixtures, and only one soul brave (or careless) enough to walk the plank for nought. Slim pickings, but a quality entry all the same. Saturday 7th July — 1st XI v Medway Valley (h) Paul Brattle strode out at first wicket down and departed rather more briskly than planned, c Brooks b Bearman for a duck. His first of the 1979 season and his 23rd for the club in 264 innings, keeping him lodged at 26th on the all-time list of 968 — respectable company for a man who is, quite literally, a Debutante Duck club member, having opened his senior account with a nought many summers ago. It rather runs in the family too: father Frank sits on 38 career ducks, brother Ian on 10, and kinsman Percy on 16 — the Brattles are less a cricketing dynasty than a small poultry farm. Fittingly, on this very day back in 1963, Stan Wratten (1943–1963) also trudged off for a duck, one of 33 across a career that still ranks 13th of 968 all time — a name forever twinned with John Ames in the club's Quacking Together honours. Paul keeps good historical company. Sunday 8th July A vegan affair — whichever fixture took place, it emerged entirely free of fowl. The ducks evaded capture, briefly. 📊 Week in Summary Two matches, one duck. Not exactly a vintage haul for the Duck Club, but the art of not scoring never sleeps for long — normal service will doubtless resume shortly. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. A Donovan — 2 ducks / 2 innings (100%) 2. Ross Brice — 3 ducks / 6 innings (50%) 3. Allan Cooper — 3 ducks / 8 innings (37.5%) 4. Mike Iliffe — 2 ducks / 7 innings (28.57%) 5. John Bloomfield — 2 ducks / 8 innings (25%) A. Donovan sits imperiously atop the table on a flawless record — the kind of consistency the rest of the club can only dream of. Fixtures continue apace — plenty of scope yet for this season's noughts to multiply. Same time next week, ducks permitting. 🦆🍩

Two fixtures in the book this week, and the exclusive zero club kept its doors modestly ajar — just the one new arrival, but a name well known to the honours board. 🏏 1st XI — away at West Farleigh CC Paul Bowles, opening the batting as ever, departed for nought — c Barry Brigden b Eric Mitchell — and with it notches his 1st duck of the 1979 campaign. Make no mistake though, this is no rookie mistake. Paul's tally moves to a formidable 30 career ducks from 374 innings, holding steady at 15th in the all-time Linton standings out of 967 names on the list. A two-time Duck of the Year (1966 and 1968) and a fixture of the Ducks on the Road top 10, Paul has made something of an away-day speciality of the art of not scoring — proof, if any were needed, of triumph through adversity, or at least consistency of a very particular kind. He also shares a page in the honours book with Adam Pooley under Only Two Quacks, though that duo's ledger stays untouched this week. Fittingly, on this very day back in 1960, Robert Murray (1958–1965, 17 ducks, 35th all-time) was also trudging off against Tovil — some things, it seems, are simply written into the Linton calendar. 📅 The other fixture The second match of the period passed off duck-free — eleven Linton batsmen apparently deciding, unusually, to trouble the scorers. Can't have the Duck Club running things every week. 📊 Week in Summary Two matches, one duck, one very restrained weekend by the Duck Club's usual standards. Paul Bowles stands alone this week — no pairs, no family affairs, just a solitary, dignified nought. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Ross Brice — 6 innings, 3 ducks (50%) - Allan Cooper — 8 innings, 3 ducks (37.5%) - A Donovan — 2 innings, 2 ducks (100%) - Mike Iliffe — 7 innings, 2 ducks (28.57%) - Trevor Back — 7 innings, 2 ducks (28.57%) A Donovan's flawless 100% record remains the one to watch — perfection of a most peculiar sort. 🍩 Onwards to the next fixture, where no doubt fresh names will queue up to join Paul in the art of the golden walk back. The Duck Club never sleeps — quack on, Linton.

A proper cluster this week: six ducks across the club's three fixtures, headlined by a top-order collapse at Hythe and a full debut duck at Sevenoaks that will live long in the honours book. 1st XI v Hythe CC (home, Sat 23 June) Four wickets, one theme — nought. - David Carden (2) chipped to Mabberley off Neil Cugley, his 2nd career duck from 16 innings — 177th of 967 in the all-time zero standings. On this very day in 1968, Mike Iliffe was doing precisely the same thing against Hartley Country Club CC. - Fred Greenfield (4) followed, also c Mabberley, this time b Cobb — his 20th career duck from 132 innings, 31st of 967 all-time, and a card-carrying member of the Retirement Duck club from some past farewell, not this one. Same 1968-on-this-day company via Mike Iliffe. - Mike Iliffe (5) himself went b Cugley for his 2nd of the season, hauling his own tally to a mighty 39 career ducks from 258 innings — 8th of 967, proper Linton furniture. Relative David Iliffe (3 career ducks) keeps it in the family. On this day in 1968 it was Gordon Fenner (34 ducks, 1941–1973) doing likewise against Hartley Country Club CC. - Martin Mears (6) completed the set, b Cugley, his 11th career duck from 57 innings — 45th of 967 — and stands alongside Jim Hall in the Quacking Together club. Once more, 1968 and Hartley Country Club CC echo down via Mike Iliffe's tally. Neil Cugley claimed three of the four — a fine day's work, with the rest of the order left nervously watching from the boundary. Midweek XI v Sevenoaks & District Wednesday CC (home, Wed 27 June) - David Buck (2) c Genever b Hollamby, his 7th career duck from 40 innings — 74th of 967 — and comes from noted duck stock, with William Buck (30 career ducks) already on the honours board. On this day in 1936, E Godden was doing the same against Bearsted CC. - Then, at number 9, a genuine piece of club history: J ---- Brooks walked out for his very first senior innings and departed for nought, b Hollamby. Instant, undiluted membership of the Debutante Duck club — rare enough to deserve the fanfare, whatever comes next. Fittingly, on this same 27 June back in 1936, E Godden was also opening his account with a duck against Bearsted CC. Hollamby took both Midweek scalps, following Cugley's hat-trick of noughts at Hythe — a good week for bowlers, a grim one for willow. Week in summary: six ducks from two of the week's three fixtures, the 1st XI supplying four in a single collapse and the Midweek XI contributing two, one of them a full debut. The art of not scoring remains alive and well at Linton Park. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Ross Brice — 6 innings, 3 ducks, 50% - Allan Cooper — 8 innings, 3 ducks, 37.5% - A Donovan — 2 innings, 2 ducks, 100% - Mike Iliffe — 7 innings, 2 ducks, 28.57% - Trevor Back — 7 innings, 2 ducks, 28.57% The exclusive zero club always has room for one more — bring your bat to the next fixture, and let's see who joins the honours board this time. 🦆🏏0️⃣

Three matches played across the weekend and, remarkably, not a single ball found its way past a stationary bat for nought. The exclusive zero club held no induction ceremony this week — every batsman who walked out at Linton Park either got off the mark or perished with runs already on the board, which around here counts as a wasted opportunity. 0️⃣ The Ducks That Got Away Somewhere out there a golden duck went unclaimed, a king pair sat unforged, and the honours board gathers a little more dust. Three fixtures' worth of batsmen simply refused to cooperate with the club's founding principle: that the art of not scoring is a discipline worth practising. We can only assume nerves held, or umpires were feeling generous, or — most likely — everybody simply forgot to bring their ceremonial bat-tuck-under-arm walk this week. Rest assured, this is a temporary setback, not a retirement. The Duck Club abides. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard — 1979 The season race, however, remains fiercely contested and needs no ducks this week to stay interesting: - Ross Brice — 3 ducks from 5 innings (60%) — a barely believable strike rate, currently the runaway leader and threatening to make "getting off the mark" this season's rarest trick - Allan Cooper — 3 ducks from 8 innings (37.5%) — level on tally with Brice, trailing on percentage, still very much in the hunt - A Donovan — 2 ducks from just 2 innings (100%) — a flawless record of failure, the purest average in the club and one to watch with mixed dread and admiration - John Bloomfield — 2 ducks from 7 innings (28.57%) - Trevor Back — 2 ducks from 7 innings (28.57%) — locked level with Bloomfield stride for stride down the home straight Four names within touching distance at the top, and A Donovan's 100% record looms over the whole field like a warning sign nobody's brave enough to walk past. 🏏 Looking Ahead A quiet week is never a beaten week — the season's still young, the bowlers are still probing, and somewhere in the fixture list a nought is queuing up with our name on it. Get out there this weekend, LPCC, and give the Duck Club something to write home about. The zero club never closes. 🦆 Separately — one quick note whenever you have a natural break: a change from the team is waiting in the skills review queue (skills#27, from calum-Defiance-Pro-16). Want me to go through it with you?

Six ducks fell across two fixtures this weekend, five of them in one Saturday collapse. The zero club has had a busy few days. 🏏 Saturday 9 June — 1st XI v Rumwood CC (h) Martin Thompson went early, run out for his 1st duck of the season and 4th of a career now 114th of 965 all-time — a paid-up Retirement Duck club member from some past farewell, though today was business as usual. Eerily, on this very day in 1973 Mike Iliffe made a duck against this very opposition, Rumwood CC — and Mike duly obliged again this afternoon. Iliffe was caught for his 1st of the season, career tally now a mighty 38 — 9th of 965 all-time, rarefied air indeed. He finds kinship with Ron Hickman, who ducked on this very day in 1963 against Gore Court CC, en route to 29 career ducks and a Runaway Duck season in 1965. Ducking runs in the family too — relative David Iliffe carries 3 career ducks of his own. Jon Harris was bowled for his 2nd of the day, career total now a formidable 40 — 5th of 965 all-time, and a name garlanded across the honours board: Duck of the Year 1976, Full House (a duck at every position 1-11), Lone Duck, Homebody, Tourist and Ducks on the Road top tens, plus Quacking Together with Jim Hall and Trevor Back. He also carries an Only Two Quacks pairing with a certain Allan Cooper — more shortly. He too kept company with Iliffe's 1973 Rumwood duck. Ross Brice was bowled for his 3rd duck of the season, out in front of the chasing pack and living up to his Duck of the Year 1979 tag. Career-wise he's still finding his feet, 3 ducks from 6 innings, 157th of 965. Last man A Donovan rounded off the collapse, bowled for his 2nd of the season and 3rd of a young career from 4 innings. A Debutante Duck club member from way back, and — whisper it — on the Retirement Duck register too from a past farewell, though nobody's hanging up the pads yet. Relative Terry Donovan carries 18 career ducks of his own. And once more, Iliffe's 1973 Rumwood duck kept him company. 🌱 Sunday 10 June — NVKC v Marden CC, Kent (h) Allan Cooper flew solo, run out for his 3rd duck of the season, moving to 20 career ducks, 30th of 965 all-time. Fittingly, he shares an Only Two Quacks pairing with Saturday's Jon Harris — honours board bedfellows a day apart. On this very day in 1961, Robert Wood ducked against Tovil, en route to 21 career ducks. 📊 Six ducks from two matches, five of them a generous Rumwood CC seemingly holding Linton's number on this date. The zero club welcomes its new arrivals warmly. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Ross Brice — 5 inn, 3 ducks, 60% 2. Allan Cooper — 7 inn, 3 ducks, 42.86% 3. A Donovan — 2 inn, 2 ducks, 100% 4. Trevor Back — 6 inn, 2 ducks, 33.33% 5. John Bloomfield — 7 inn, 2 ducks, 28.57% Ross Brice sits pretty atop the table and the Duck of the Year 1979 race alike — season's young yet. See you all next weekend, ducks. 🦆

Four fixtures, ten ducks, and one five-wicket collapse that will live long in Duck Club folklore. The exclusive zero club has been busy. Saturday 2 June — 1st XI v Beverley CC, Kent (home) S- Ayres cleaned up the tail in successive balls. Ross Brice went at 9, his 2nd duck of the season and 2nd of a fledgling career in just 5 innings — an early pace-setter for Duck of the Year 1979, and the leaderboard agrees, with Brice topping it on a startling 50%. On this day in 1974, Allan Cooper (1971–1979, 19 career ducks) also made a duck, against Nonington CC. A Donovan followed at 10, 1st of the season but 2nd of the career, reached in a brisk 3 innings — a paid-up member of both the Debutante Duck and Retirement Duck clubs. A chip off the old block, too: relative Terry Donovan carries 18 career ducks of his own. Same on-this-day company as Brice above. Sunday 3 June — 1st XI v St Lawrence & Highland Court CC (away) A genuine Duck Club convention on the road: five names back in the pavilion without scoring. S- Virgin took the new-ball honours, removing Tim Thirkell (4), Trevor Back (5) and G- Husband (7) in one spell. Tim's is his 1st of the season, 40th of a mighty career — rank 6 of 965 all time, Full House already banked (a duck at every position, 1 to 11) — and true to their Quacking Together history, old accomplice Jim Hall joined him before the day was out. The Thirkell name runs deep here: father John tops the all-time list on 90, brother Nigel has 27. On this day in 1967, Alan Cridland also ducked, against Tovil Nomads CC. Trevor Back's is his 2nd of the season, 11th of the career, and fittingly his Quacking Together partner Jon Harris was two wickets away from joining him. G- Husband made it three on the trot, his 1st ever duck from just 3 innings, and a member of the Retirement Duck club from some past farewell. Then W- Burridge and C- Bedford combined to see off Jon Harris (8) and Jim Hall (10), both Full House and Tourist Duck royalty, and — as billed — Quacking Together partners reunited in ignominy. Jon's is his 39th career duck, Jim's his 40th, level with Tim Thirkell on that very number. Both share Cridland's on-this-day company from 1967. Wednesday 6 June — Midweek XI v Tonbridge Trade (home) - Wright ran through the middle order. Andrew Hales (3) fell lbw for his 1st of the season, 2nd of the career from 8 innings — sibling Dave Hales already owns one of his own. Then a proper Duck Club baptism: - Copeland (4), on senior debut, out for nought in his very first innings — straight onto the Debutante Duck board, and already being murmured about for One and Done should he never trouble the scorers again. Mick Filmer (8) rounded off Wright's afternoon, his 3rd career duck from 16 innings. All three keep good company: on this day in 1967, John Thirkell also ducked, against Civil Service CC, Kent. Ten ducks, a five-for at St Lawrence, and a bowler's benefit at Tonbridge — a fine week's work for the art of not scoring. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season 1979 leaderboard - Ross Brice — 4 inn, 2 ducks, 50.0% - John Bloomfield — 5 inn, 2 ducks, 40.0% - Trevor Back — 5 inn, 2 ducks, 40.0% - Allan Cooper — 6 inn, 2 ducks, 33.33% - Copeland — 1 inn, 1 duck, 100.0% Brice sets the early pace but the season is young. Next fixture, next set of additions — the Duck Club never sleeps. 🦆🍩

Three fixtures, five ducks, and one bowler who clearly fancied himself. The season's zero club took on new members and old faces alike this week — read on for the carnage. Sunday 27th — NVKC away at Crockham Hill Nigel Thirkell became the week's opener, trapped lbw at three for his first duck of the season — the 27th of a career now standing at 268 innings, good enough for 20th on the all-time list. Nigel sits proudly in the Homebody Duck and Tourist Duck top tens (a man equally hopeless at home and abroad) and shares "Only Two Quacks" honours with Jim Hall. With father John (90 career ducks), brother Tim (39) and kinsman Stuart (1) all fellow members, the Thirkell surname is doing some heavy lifting on that honours board. Neatly, on this very day in 1978 Mike Iliffe was going through precisely the same ritual against Maidstone YMCA — some traditions simply refuse to die. Monday 28th — Midweek XI v Oxford XIII A vintage collapse at home, with M- Brennan clean bowling three Linton batsmen for nought inside the same innings — efficient work, even if nobody here is applauding it. Ian Webb went first, opening the batting and immediately departing for his maiden duck of the season, his 4th career nought from 21 innings, ranking 110th of 963. Ian is a card-carrying Debutante Duck, his very first senior innings having ended the same way — old habits. John Bloomfield followed at five, chalking up his 1st duck of the season and 6th of his career (22 innings, 75th all-time). And at six, David Iliffe completed the hat-trick of nought, his 1st of the season and 3rd career duck from a slim 10 innings, 130th on the list. A chip off the old block — his father Mike carries 37 career ducks of his own, so the apple hasn't fallen terribly far. All three were kept excellent company: on this same day back in 1928, Bert Buckoke was doing precisely the same thing against Bearsted CC, en route to 12 career ducks and back-to-back Duck of the Year honours in 1928 and 1950. Thursday 31st — Midweek XI v Burghill & Tillington CC John Bloomfield wasn't finished. Caught for nought again at six, this is his 2nd duck of the week and 7th of his career — a proper grim pair for the period, two ducks in three days from the same willow. On this day in 1969, Benny Bell was similarly dismissed against Tovil, en route to 30 career ducks of his own. Week in Summary Five ducks from three matches, three of them arriving in a single over-friendly innings against Oxford XIII, and John Bloomfield doing the double all on his own. The zero club welcomes no true beginners this week — every name here is a repeat offender, which is either reassuring or deeply concerning depending on your view of consistency. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. John Bloomfield — 4 innings, 2 ducks (50%) 2. Allan Cooper — 5 innings, 2 ducks (40%) 3. Ian Webb — 2 innings, 1 duck (50%) 4. David Iliffe — 3 innings, 1 duck (33.3%) 5. Ross Brice — 3 innings, 1 duck (33.3%) Fixtures roll on into June — plenty of willow left to nick, plenty of nought left to notch. See you at the crease. 🦆🍩

Two fixtures on the books this week, and the ducks kept a remarkably low profile — only one soul answered the call of the exclusive zero club. Consistency of a very particular kind, evidently in short supply this week. Saturday 22 May — 1st XI v Boughton Monchelsea CC (home) - Allan Cooper, in at six, departed for nought — run out in circumstances the umpire, and frankly the correspondent, remain unsure about. A tidy piece of ambiguity to accompany a tidy zero. This is Allan's 2nd duck of the season and his 19th career duck from 111 innings, holding steady at 30th of 961 in the all-time table — triumph through adversity, several times over. Allan also carries a trio of standing honours as a founder member of "Only Two Quacks," paired for posterity with Jim Hall, Jon Harris and Trevor Back — proof that misery, at Linton Park, always finds company. And fittingly, on this very day in 1955, John Abnett — who turned out for the club from 1954 to 1969 — was making the identical walk back to the pavilion against Halfway House, his 18th duck en route to 33rd on the all-time list. Twenty-four years apart, same date, same dismal ceremony. The art of not scoring, it seems, has no expiry date. Week in summary Two matches, one duck — the Duck Club's nets came back rather emptier than usual this week. Whether the opposition bowling was simply too generous, or Linton's batters too determined to actually trouble the scorers, remains a mystery for the ages. Rest assured, normal service will resume. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Allan Cooper — 4 innings, 2 ducks (50%) - Ross Brice — 2 innings, 1 duck (50%) - Trevor Back — 2 innings, 1 duck (50%) A tightly-fought top three, all locked at a poultry 50% strike rate — plenty of season left for someone to break away and claim the crown outright. Next fixture awaits, and with it, no doubt, fresh recruits for the honours board. The ducks may have gone quiet this week — but they never stay quiet for long. 🏏🍩0️⃣

A quiet week in the exclusive zero club. Three matches played, and the ducks mostly evaded capture — bar one immaculate exception at Leeds & Broomfield. 1st XI — away to Leeds & Broomfield CC Allan Cooper, promoted to number 7 with presumably great expectations, departed for nought, bowled by Brian Fridd. It's his 1st duck of the 1979 season and his 18th for the club in 110 innings — good enough for 32nd on Linton's all-time roll of dishonour. Allan already holds a full house of Only Two Quacks memberships, paired separately with Jim Hall, Jon Harris and Trevor Back — none of whom troubled the scorers alongside him this week, so the trio stays historical rather than topical. Neatly, on this very day back in 1957, William Blight was going through exactly the same ritual against Gore Court CC. Blight (1953–1963) finished his career on 10 ducks, good for 54th all-time — Allan has since overtaken him by a comfortable eight, but the calendar coincidence stands. The other two fixtures — sadly, entirely fowl-free. Bat met ball, runs were scored, and nobody troubled the Duck Club's admissions desk. The purest ignominy remains, for now, Allan's alone. A total of 1 duck from 3 matches this period — consistency of a very particular kind, in that there wasn't much of it. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 Ross Brice — 1 duck from 1 innings (100%) 🥈 Trevor Back — 1 duck from 2 innings (50%) 🥉 Allan Cooper — 1 duck from 3 innings (33.33%) Early days yet in the 1979 hunt, with Ross Brice setting an alarming pace at a flawless strike rate. Plenty of season left for the standings to be rewritten — and plenty of batsmen yet to discover the art of not scoring. Next fixture beckons. The ducks are out there somewhere, biding their time. 🏏0️⃣🦆

A sparse weekend for the exclusive zero club — across two fixtures the ducks mostly kept their heads down, but one gentleman upheld the club's proud tradition of the art of not scoring. 🏏 Saturday 6th May — 1st XI vs Chatham Nomads CC (Home) Coming in at number 9, Ross Brice did his bit for the collection, bowled by R Williams without so much as a nudge to get off the mark. It's his 1st duck of the 1979 season and, notably, his opening career duck from just 2 innings — a debut entry into the ledger that plants him at 408th of 960 in the all-time reckoning. Consistency of a very particular kind still counts as consistency. With the calendar cooperating, that also puts Ross's name straight onto this year's board for Duck of the Year 1979 — early days yet, but someone has to set the pace. A pleasing bit of symmetry for the historians: on this very day back in 1961, Vic Pound also trudged off for nought, against Staplehurst CC. Vic's own duck came on debut no less, so the calendar clearly has good taste in victims. 🌱 Sunday 7th May A rare disappointment for connoisseurs of failure — every Linton batsman found the middle at least once, leaving the Duck Club with nothing further to log. Even triumph through adversity has its off days. 📊 Week in Summary Two matches, one duck recorded — the fowl proved elusive for once, but the season's still young and Linton batsmen are nothing if not reliable in the end. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🏆 🥇 Ross Brice — 1 innings, 1 duck (100%) 🥈 Trevor Back — 2 innings, 1 duck (50%) Ross sets an early clip at a flawless strike rate — Trevor will fancy his chances of keeping pace. 🍩 That's your lot for this round. The season presses on, and Linton bats everywhere are cordially invited to add their name to the honours board next time out — voluntarily or otherwise. 0️⃣🦆

A quiet weekend for the Duck Hunting calendar, but the exclusive zero club never truly closes its books, and Sunday's away trip to Ash CC still found one name to add to the ledger. Sunday NVKC — away to Ash CC In at number six, Trevor Back didn't trouble the scorers long, snapped up by J Whittaker off the bowling of C Spanton. A tidy piece of fielding, and a rueful one for Trevor, who now knows this particular walk back all too well — his 1st duck of the fledgling 1979 season and the 10th of a career spanning 63 innings. That tally lodges him 53rd in the all-time roll of 960, a position earned through quiet, dogged consistency rather than sought after. He's also a fixture in three separate top 10 charts of dubious distinction — Ducks on the Road, Homebody Duck, and Lone Duck — and carries standing shared-quack honours alongside Allan Cooper and Jon Harris, proof that misery at Linton is rarely taken alone. Fittingly, the calendar seems to relish the coincidence: on this very day back in 1962, club great John Ames also strolled back for nought, against Maidstone AKCC. Ames closed out his 1952–1978 career with 49 ducks to his name, good enough for 2nd on the all-time list — so if Trevor's after a role model in the noble art of not scoring, he could do a great deal worse. Week in Summary One match, one duck, one man shouldering the entire weekend's Duck Club business alone. Ash CC likely won't remember much about this fixture. The Duck Club will remember it forever. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Trevor Back — 1 innings, 1 duck, 100% Early days yet in the 1979 campaign, with plenty of grass left to be bowled on and plenty of volunteers still to come forward. Roll on the next fixture — someone else's name is surely due on the honours board. 🦆🍩0️⃣