🦆 The Duck Pond

A single fixture took place in this period and, remarkably, the ducks went entirely uncaptured. Eleven names in the book, not one troubled the exclusive zero club. Whether this was superb defensive technique or simply generous bowling, the record does not say — but the Duck Club's hunters return home empty-handed. A quiet weekend for connoisseurs of the art of not scoring. Even Jim Hall, sitting on a fearsome 37.5% strike rate this season, kept his powder dry. Let it be known: the ducks evaded capture, not that they don't exist. 🏏 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard — 1967 1. John Thirkell — 4 ducks in 34 innings (11.76%) 2. Jim Hall — 3 ducks in 8 innings (37.5%) 🍩 3. Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks in 20 innings (15.0%) 4. Frank Brattle — 3 ducks in 27 innings (11.11%) 5. Paul Bowles — 3 ducks in 30 innings (10.0%) Jim Hall remains the season's most efficient collector by some distance — better than one duck in every three trips to the crease is a rate the rest of the club can only admire from a respectful distance. John Thirkell holds the outright lead on raw numbers, four for the campaign and counting, while Bowles, Brattle and Greenfield lurk in close company on three apiece, each no doubt eyeing the others nervously. 📅 Looking ahead A blank week is no cause for complacency — the zero club never sleeps for long, and normal service will surely resume at the next opportunity. Get your whites on, gentlemen, and may fortune desert at least one of you. 🦆 0️⃣

Late-season action from Bearsted way, and a modest but perfectly formed harvest of two from the one fixture on the books. The exclusive zero club never sleeps, even as the year draws in. Saturday — 1st XI v West Farleigh CC (home) - Basil Sears opened proceedings and departed just as promptly, lbw b D Kemp for a duck. His 2nd of the season and a hefty 22nd for the career from 336 innings — a genuinely industrious relationship with the nought, good enough for 10th on the all-time list of 831. Curiously, on this very day back in 1962 Terry Whittaker (1958–1967) also fell for a duck against Linton Park CC — Terry sits one behind on 22 himself, a paid-up member of both Quacking Together (with Brian Relf) and the Retirement Duck club. History, it seems, likes a September fixture. - Malcolm Pay, sent in at number 8, was bowled by Ron Kemp without troubling the scorers. His maiden duck of the season and only his 2nd in a career of 12 innings so far — rank 167 of 831, plenty of room to climb for the ambitious young quacker. Fittingly, that same 1962 apparition, Terry Whittaker, echoes down the years once more — proof that West Farleigh has form for extracting noughts on the 23rd of September. Week in Summary One match, two ducks, and both fell to the Kemp family bowling — D Kemp and Ron Kemp sharing the spoils. Basil's continued fluency in the art of not scoring keeps him firmly inside the all-time top ten, while Malcolm's early education in the discipline is coming along nicely. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 - John Thirkell — 33 inns, 4 ducks (12.12%) - Jim Hall — 8 inns, 3 ducks (37.5%) 🍩 - Fred Greenfield — 20 inns, 3 ducks (15.0%) - Frank Brattle — 27 inns, 3 ducks (11.11%) - Paul Bowles — 29 inns, 3 ducks (10.34%) Jim Hall's eye-watering 37.5% keeps him the most efficient collector in the field, though John Thirkell's raw tally of four leads the chase as the season winds down. The next fixture awaits, and with it, no doubt, further additions to this most dubious of honours boards. Bring your bat, and bring your sense of humour. 🏏0️⃣

A single fixture out on the park today, and — remarkably — not a single member of the exclusive zero club was inducted. Eleven batsmen went out, and eleven batsmen, by all accounts, troubled the scorer. The art of not scoring took the day off. Rare are the afternoons when Linton's finest fail to fail, and rarer still that it's worth remarking upon, but here we are. No golden ducks, no pairs, no family affairs to report — just runs, glorious runs, cluttering up the scorebook where a nought or two would have been so much tidier. Do not mistake this for a quiet season, mind. The chase for Duck of the Year 1967 remains fierce, and today's non-event has done nothing to trouble the standings below. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard — top 5 🥇 John Thirkell — 4 ducks in 32 innings (12.5%) 🥈 Jim Hall — 3 ducks in 8 innings (37.5%) — a positively alarming strike rate 🥉 Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks in 19 innings (15.79%) 4️⃣ Frank Brattle — 3 ducks in 27 innings (11.11%) 5️⃣ Paul Bowles — 3 ducks in 28 innings (10.71%) Special mention to Jim Hall, who is quietly assembling one of the more efficient duck rates on the books — over a third of his innings ending in nought is the kind of consistency this club was built to celebrate. So the hunt continues. The ducks evaded capture today, but they are out there somewhere, sharpening their off stumps and waiting. Next fixture, normal service will surely resume — see you at the crease, or more likely, on the walk back to the pavilion. 🏏🍩0️⃣

Two fixtures on the board this weekend, but only one troubled the scorers where it mattered — the ducks, mercifully or not, all came from a single innings at home to A. Trembeths. 1st XI v A. Trembeths (home) In at four, Keith Pride departed for nought, bowled by B. Stalley — his first duck of the 1967 season and, with only three career innings to his name, his very first for the club too. That puts him at 1 career duck, 301st of 831 in the all-time standings, and quietly signs him up to the club's Retirement Duck honours board — a standing distinction for those whose careers eventually close on a nought, not a comment on today's business. On this very day back in 1961, John Crellin fell the same way against St Lukes Maidstone CC — Crellin went on to be crowned Duck of the Year that season with 9 to his name, so Keith walks back in fine historical company. Six down the order at ten, Jon Harris followed him for nought, caught behind off the same relentless Stalley. His second duck of the season lifts him to 4 career ducks from just 6 innings — 87th of 831 all-time — and adds another line to an already crowded honours cabinet. Jon carries Full House (a duck at every position 1 to 11), places in both the Lone Duck and Tourist/Homebody Duck top tens, and shared pairing honours with Allan Cooper, Jim Hall and Trevor Back. He's also a card-carrying member of the Debutante Duck club from his actual first-ever innings, long before this one. A chip off the old block, too — his kinsman Richard Harris carries 36 career ducks of his own. And, fittingly, Jon shares today's on-this-day parallel with Keith: Crellin's 1961 duck against St Lukes, on the very same date. Week in summary Two ducks from two matches, both from the same fixture and the same bowler — B. Stalley can consider his afternoon's work well spent. The other game on the weekend's card passed off entirely fowl-free. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 John Thirkell — 4 ducks, 31 innings (12.9%) 🥈 Jim Hall — 3 ducks, 8 innings (37.5%) 🥉 Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks, 18 innings (16.67%) 4. Frank Brattle — 3 ducks, 27 innings (11.11%) 5. Paul Bowles — 3 ducks, 27 innings (11.11%) Jim Hall's blistering 37.5% strike rate keeps him firmly in touch at the top, and with Jon Harris's own "Quacking Together" honours tied to him, the club's zero-scoring bloodlines run deep this season. The exclusive zero club never sleeps 🍩 — next fixture, more opportunity, more ignominy. See you at the crease. 🦆🏏0️⃣

Eight ducks in three matches this week, the exclusive zero club welcoming a fresh intake with real ceremony — two debut victims, one long-serving colossus, and a Birchington collapse that reads like a shopping list. Saturday 2 September — 1st XI v Beverley CC, Kent (home) A rich harvest at home, three careers dented in a single innings. - R Venner (4), c B Short b M Bryant — first-ever senior innings, first-ever duck. Instant membership of the Debutante Duck and (so far) One and Done 1967 rolls. On this very date in 1945, D Clark made exactly the same duck against 1st Innings MCPC — company across the decades. - Jon Harris (8), c B Short b K Collard — his 3rd career duck from just 5 innings, a rate that already has him deep in the club's exotic leaderboards: Lone Duck, Tourist Duck and Homebody Duck top tens, plus Full House for ducking at every position 1–11. Quacking Together honours with Jim Hall and Trevor Back besides. Relative Richard Harris already carries 36 career ducks — clearly a gift runs in the family. Joins Venner in the 1945 echo of D Clark. - P- Williams (10), c B Short b K Collard — another debut, another instant duck, another name for the Debutante and One and Done boards. D Clark's 1945 effort keeps him company too. Sunday 3 September — 1st XI v Frindsbury CC (home) - John Ames, c G Fox b B Hill — opened and departed without scoring, his 37th career duck from 284 innings and 4th on the all-time list. Chasing his own Ducks in a Row landmark, with Quacking Together links to Roy Clarke and Stan Wratten. On this day in 1944, Jimmy Jameson found similarly little joy against the Home Guard's Royal West Kent 11th Battalion. Wednesday 6 September — Midweek XI v Birchington CC (away) Four down for four ducks, as if the middle order travelled as a package. - Roger Craddock (2), c R Abraham b P Smith — his first duck of the season, and his only one in 18 career innings. John Ames, coincidentally, ducked against Tovil on this exact date back in 1958. - John Thirkell (4), c R Abraham b P Smith — his 4th duck of the season, 61st of his career, and still comfortably #1 on the all-time list. Already installed on the Duck of the Year board for 1952, 1954, 1955 — and now 1967, a season he leads by daylight. - William Buck (5), c R Abraham b P Smith — P Smith's third victim of the innings. His 28th career duck, 9th all-time, and a Quacking Together partnership with his fallen colleague Thirkell, now doubled up on the board and in the scorebook. - Percy Brattle (7), b R Yates — his 6th career duck from 44 innings. Relative Frank Brattle already sits on 31 career ducks for the club — the bloodline for scorelessness runs deep. The week in brief Eight ducks, three matches, two collapses of three-plus in a single innings. Beverley and Birchington will not be missed fondly. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 John Thirkell — 29 inn, 4 ducks (13.79%) 🥈 Jim Hall — 8 inn, 3 ducks (37.5%) 🥉 Fred Greenfield — 18 inn, 3 ducks (16.67%) Paul Bowles — 25 inn, 3 ducks (12.0%) Frank Brattle — 26 inn, 3 ducks (11.54%) Next fixture looms, and with it another chance for someone to join this week's roll of honour. Pads on, bats ready, nought expected. 🦆🏏0️⃣

Three fixtures on the go this weekend and, remarkably, the zero club kept its numbers modest. Just the one nought to report — proof that even the most dedicated poultry farmers need a Sunday off now and then. 🏏 1st XI v Aylesford Paper Mills CC — Saturday 26th Derry Evans, walking in at number 8, departed bowled David Keynes — no first-baller ignominy this time, but the outcome was the same: back to the pavilion with nothing to show for it. This is Derry's 2nd duck of the season and his 4th in an LPCC career now spanning 20 innings, a return that plants him at a solid 81st of 828 in the all-time roll of dishonour. No honours-board silverware to his name yet, but the club always has room for one more subscription. Rather splendidly, on this very day back in 1962, none other than John Ames also strolled back for nought — against Sevenoaks Vine CC, as it happens, rather than Aylesford, but a duck's a duck regardless of opposition. Ames played from 1952 to 1967 and finished his career with a magnificent 36 ducks, good enough for 4th of 828 all-time, plus a mantelpiece groaning with honours: Ducks in a Row for four on the bounce, a Homebody Duck top ten placing, and shared quacking honours with both Roy Clarke and Stan Wratten. Derry has some way to go to match that legacy, but every 81st-placed finisher started somewhere. 🌾 A Quiet Weekend Elsewhere The 2nd and 3rd fixtures passed off without incident — no additions to the ledger, which either speaks to some uncharacteristically sound batting or simply means the scorers were asleep at the wheel. Either way, the Duck Club will take the rest while it can, because it never lasts. 📊 Week in Summary Three matches, one duck, and a distinctly peaceful few days for the honours board. Derry Evans stands alone this week, carrying the flag for the entire club. Quality over quantity, as the saying almost goes. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1967 1. Jim Hall — 3 ducks in 7 innings (42.86%) 2. Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks in 18 innings (16.67%) 3. Paul Bowles — 3 ducks in 24 innings (12.5%) 4. Frank Brattle — 3 ducks in 25 innings (12.0%) 5. John Thirkell — 3 ducks in 27 innings (11.11%) Jim Hall sits pretty at the top on percentage alone, but with three names locked on three ducks apiece behind him, this season's crown is very much up for grabs. 🍩 Next weekend's fixtures await, and the zero club never stays quiet for long. Pads on, bats ready, and may fortune favour absolutely nobody. 🦆0️⃣

Well, ducklings, brace yourselves for a rare and faintly troubling headline: the hunters returned from the one fixture played this period with their nets entirely empty. Not a single nought to report. Every batsman across the one match on the books this week contrived, infuriatingly, to actually score. 🏏 The Great Escape We can only assume the ducks got wind of the Club's reputation and scattered for cover. Somewhere out there a bowler is nursing a golden opportunity spurned, and somewhere a scorer's "0" column sits gathering dust, unblemished and unloved. The exclusive zero club held no induction ceremony this week — a place of dubious distinction briefly, and only briefly, closed for business. Do not mistake this for good news. The art of not scoring is a proud Linton tradition and this is merely a pause, not a retirement. The ducks will return — they always do. 📊 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard — 1967 Even in a quiet week the season standings make for sobering reading: - Jim Hall — 3 ducks from 6 innings, a startling 50% strike rate. At that pace he's less a batsman than a season-long tribute act to the number nought. - Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks from 18 innings (16.67%), keeping respectable company near the top. - Paul Bowles — 3 ducks from 22 innings (13.64%), quietly consistent in the worst possible way. - Frank Brattle — 3 ducks from 23 innings (13.04%), proof that persistence and poultry can coexist. - John Thirkell — 3 ducks from 26 innings (11.54%), rounding out a top five that between them have contributed precisely nothing, fifteen times over, to the Linton Park run column. Jim Hall sits handsomely clear on percentage and will want watching — at one duck every two innings he's setting a pace that would make the club's greats sit up and take note. 🔭 Looking Ahead A blank week is a dangerous thing — it only ever builds pressure for the next one. With the season's contenders circling and Jim Hall setting an ominous rate, it surely can't be long before someone obliges. Pads on, cameras ready, standards low. We watch. We wait. We celebrate. 🦆 0️⃣

A quieter weekend for the exclusive zero club — just the two admissions across two fixtures — but quality over quantity, as ever, in the art of not scoring. 1st XI Saturday, home to Shepherds Lambs: Gordon Fenner, promoted to number 6 and given the full ceremonial treatment, was bowled by M-Harries for nought. His 2nd duck of the season and 29th of a long and storied career, edging him to 7th in the all-time standings out of 827 — rarefied air indeed. The Fenner name is no stranger to the honours board either, with siblings Joe (5 career ducks) and Maurice (1) keeping the family firmly represented in the ledger. Spookily, on this very day back in 1956, John Larking — who turned out for Linton from 1944 to 1962 — was also dismissed without score, against Harrietsham CC of all opponents. Sunday, away at Harrietsham CC: Paul Bowles, in at 4, was run out for a duck he'll be keen to blame on his partner. His 3rd of the season and 10th of his career lifts him to 35th all-time, and he arrives with pedigree — a Duck of the Year 1966 champion, a fixture in the Ducks on the Road top 10, and one half of Only Two Quacks alongside Adam Pooley. On this same day in 1960, Pat Hardwick (1959–1960) also perished for nought, against Bowaters CC, on his way to lifting the Duck of the Year crown that very season. History does love to repeat itself. Week in Summary Two matches, two ducks, one bowled and one run out — a tidy, if modest, week's work for the hunting season. No pairs, no family affairs this time, but Paul Bowles' latest effort quietly nudges him straight into this season's leaderboard picture. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 1. Jim Hall — 3 ducks in 6 innings (50%) 2. Fred Greenfield — 3 ducks in 18 innings (16.67%) 3. Paul Bowles — 3 ducks in 21 innings (14.29%) 4. Frank Brattle — 3 ducks in 22 innings (13.64%) 5. John Thirkell — 3 ducks in 26 innings (11.54%) Jim Hall's frankly alarming 50% strike rate leads the chase, but with the season far from over there's everything to play for. 🏏🍩 Roll on the next fixture — the ducks never rest for long, and neither does this correspondent. 0️⃣🦆

Three matches, three ducks — a quiet week, but the quiet ones still count double in the ledger. 🏏 1st XI Away at Maidstone YMCA CC on the 5th, opener Basil Sears was run out for nought without so much as troubling the scorer — his 1st duck of the summer and 21st for the club, holding him a commanding 11th in the all-time list of 827. On this very day in 1895, 72 years to the date, Ernest Cruttenden was doing precisely the same thing against Rochester CC, a nought that helped him to the Duck of the Year honours that season. Some traditions run deep. Back home to Reeds (Tovil) on the 6th, the middle order suffered a matching pair of individual noughts. Frank Brattle, bowled by A Edwards at five, brought up his 3rd duck of the season and a mighty 31st in a 274-innings career — good enough for 6th all-time, a berth reserved for the true connoisseurs of not scoring. A relative, Percy Brattle, watches on as a fellow Duck Club member with 5 of his own, so the family clearly knows the drill. On this same day back in 1956, Tony Levick was also falling for nought, against Hon F Cornwallis — quite the calendar coincidence. One place down the order, Fred Greenfield edged M Taylor for nought at six, his own 3rd of the season, moving him to 13 career ducks and 25th on the all-time roll. Fred carries the Retirement Duck honour from a past farewell sealed with a nought — old pedigree, freshly reinforced. He shares his corner of duck history with Tony Levick too, both ducking on the 6th of August, eleven years apart. 📅 Week in Summary Three ducks from three fixtures, with Reeds (Tovil) doing the heavy lifting — two noughts in one innings — while Maidstone supplied the third. One fixture in the period escaped entirely unplucked. Modest pickings, but the season race stays lively. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Jim Hall — 5 innings, 3 ducks, 60.00% - Fred Greenfield — 17 innings, 3 ducks, 17.65% - Frank Brattle — 20 innings, 3 ducks, 15.00% - John Thirkell — 24 innings, 3 ducks, 12.50% - Alan Cridland — 6 innings, 2 ducks, 33.33% Jim Hall sets the pace on a startling 60%, but Greenfield and Brattle have just closed the gap with this week's efforts 🍩 The exclusive zero club never rests. Next fixture awaits, and with it the inevitable fresh crop of noughts — see you at the crease 🥇0️⃣

Slim pickings this week, but the exclusive zero club never quite closes its doors. 1st XI v Paddock Wood CC (home, 30 July) Opening the innings, Robert Chance departed cheaply, bowled by P- Bradshaw for nought — his 2nd duck of the 1967 season and the 3rd of a career now spanning 44 innings. That plants him 121st of 827 in the all-time roll of dishonour, a position earned through the reliable art of not scoring. Robert already has his name inked on the Retirement Duck honours board from a past farewell innings, so today's effort simply adds to a distinguished portfolio rather than closing the account. Fittingly, on this very day back in 1955, R- Waters also strolled back without scoring, against Aylesford Paper Mills CC — the 4th duck of his 1954–1956 stint and good for 88th all time. Waters too carries Retirement Duck credentials, proving some traditions at this club are handed down rather than invented. Week in Summary Two matches, one duck — a positively lean haul by Duck Club standards, and a reminder that even the connoisseurs of the nought have their off weeks. 🍩 Every other side on duty this weekend batted its way clear of the honours board entirely, which either speaks to fine form or a temporary loss of nerve for the art of getting out cheaply. Either way, the pond runs shallow for now. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Jim Hall — 3 ducks in 5 innings (60.0%) 2. John Thirkell — 3 ducks in 23 innings (13.04%) 3. Alan Cridland — 2 ducks in 6 innings (33.33%) 4. Ossie Fryer — 2 ducks in 7 innings (28.57%) 5. Benny Bell — 2 ducks in 11 innings (18.18%) Jim Hall's 60% strike rate remains the number to beat this season — a fine season of triumph through adversity if ever there was one. 0️⃣ The next fixture waits for nobody. Get out there, middle it or don't, and the Duck Club will be watching either way. 🏏🦆

Three fixtures out on the paddocks this week and, remarkably, the ducks mostly gave Linton Park a wide berth. Only one soul found his way into the exclusive zero club — but what a way to arrive. Midweek XI v Birkenhead Grasshoppers CC (home, Thu 24 July) Opening the innings and opening his LPCC account in the very same breath, K Mills departed c R Stears b N Dickinson without troubling the scorers. A debut duck in the truest sense — his very first senior innings for the club, and already he's filed for membership of the Debutante Duck board, that peculiar honour reserved for those who arrive and immediately leave. He also becomes 1967's newest One and Done entry, a single innings standing alone and undefeated in its own particular way. The record-keepers, ever thorough, have already pencilled him in among the Retirement Duck alumni too — presumptuous of them, given the man's only just walked in, but the small print insists on covering every eventuality. Mills sits 298th of 827 in the all-time standings on his maiden nought, and — spookily — on this very day back in 1960, Frank Brattle (1937–1967, 30 ducks, 6th of 827 all time) also made a duck, his against Folkestone CC. Some dates just have a taste for it. 🍩 Week in Summary One duck from three matches — the other two fixtures returned entirely fowl-free, a rare weekend of restraint from the Duck Club's usual suspects. Consistency, it seems, took the week off. Still, a debut duck is a debut duck, and the honours board never turns an application away. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Jim Hall — 3 ducks / 4 innings (75.00%) - John Thirkell — 3 ducks / 21 innings (14.29%) - Alan Cridland — 2 ducks / 6 innings (33.33%) - Ossie Fryer — 2 ducks / 6 innings (33.33%) - Benny Bell — 2 ducks / 11 innings (18.18%) Jim Hall leads the chase with a frankly alarming 75% strike rate for nought — the art of not scoring, perfected. John Thirkell's volume campaign keeps him within touching distance, and the chasing pack of Cridland, Fryer and Bell all sit level at two apiece. 🏏 Next fixtures loom, and with them the promise of fresh additions to the honours board. The Duck Club never sleeps — it merely waits at the non-striker's end. See you all out there. 0️⃣

A quiet couple of days for the ducking classes, but Linton Park's 1st XI still found time to feed the exclusive zero club. 🏏 Saturday 15 July — v Beverley CC, Kent Gordon Fenner departed at number seven, bowled by J Phipps. His first duck of the season, but hardly his first rodeo — Gordon moves to 28 career ducks from 211 innings, a lofty 7th on the all-time list. The Fenner name runs deep in these ranks too, with siblings Joe (5 career ducks) and Maurice (1) already club members in their own right. Neat footnote for the historians: on this very day in 1961, Robert Wood — who played 1958–1963, finished on 21 ducks, 11th all-time, and carries the Debutante Duck honour — was doing much the same thing against Tovil and Bridge Mill. 🏏 Sunday 16 July — v Loughton CC Two more fell in the same innings. Benny Bell went without scoring at five, bowled by J Manning — his second duck of the season and 7th career, moving him to 50th on the all-time table from a brisk 27 innings. Fittingly, on this day in 1960 it was none other than Gordon Fenner — yes, still going strong seven years later — making a duck against Rumwood CC. The Fenner influence is proving inescapable this week. One place below him, R Dudney also fell without scoring, bowled by D Peek. His maiden season duck, and his maiden career duck too, from just 4 innings — 326th on the all-time list and rising. Dudney is already a name in the club's Retirement Duck ledger, an honour reserved for a career bow-out on a nought — proof that the art of not scoring earns you a place in history whenever it happens. And once again the day's echo comes courtesy of Gordon Fenner, 1960, Rumwood CC — some traditions run deep at Linton Park. 📊 Week in Summary Three ducks from two matches, all courtesy of the 1st XI, with Gordon Fenner's 1960 vintage turning up as the historical shadow behind both of Sunday's victims. Consistency of a very particular kind. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Jim Hall — 3 ducks / 3 innings (100%) - John Thirkell — 3 ducks / 19 innings (15.79%) - Alan Cridland — 2 ducks / 5 innings (40%) - Ossie Fryer — 2 ducks / 5 innings (40%) - Benny Bell — 2 ducks / 11 innings (18.18%) Jim Hall's flawless record leads the way, with Benny Bell's Loughton contribution keeping him firmly in the hunt. The next fixture awaits — who joins the honours board next weekend? We watch. We wait. We celebrate. 🦆🍩

A quiet week for the Zero Club — three fixtures, only two ducks laid — but one of them comes with genuinely startling arithmetic attached. 🏏 1st XI At Aylesford Paper Mills CC on the 9th, number seven Jim Hall was bowled by Colin Watson. His 3rd duck of the season — and, remarkably, his 3rd innings of the season. Three trips to the crease, three ducks, a strike rate of failure that borders on the metronomic. As a paid-up member of the Debutante Duck club, Jim's very first Linton innings also brought nought, so this is clearly a man playing to type. He climbs to 112th of 826 all-time, and finds himself in fine historical company: on this same date in 1902, F E Wallis was doing precisely the same thing against Town Malling CC, en route to being crowned Duck of the Year in 1907. Two days later, away at West Farleigh CC, opener Mike Stephens was bowled by Peter J Day for his 1st duck of the season and just his 1st in 12 senior innings — a rare visitor to these pages rather than a regular. He moves to 312th of 826 all-time. And on this very date back in 1943, a young Stan Wratten was doing the same against the Royal Artillery Wing, on his way to a career haul of 28 and 7th place on the all-time table. 📊 The Week in Numbers Three matches, two ducks — restrained by Duck Club standards, but every nought still counts toward the greater glory. Jim Hall's perfect record is the story of the week: three innings, three ducks, triumph through adversity of a very particular kind. Whether the streak survives a fourth visit to the crease remains the season's most pressing question. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard, 1967 - Jim Hall — 3 innings, 3 ducks (100%) - John Thirkell — 17 innings, 3 ducks (17.65%) - Alan Cridland — 5 innings, 2 ducks (40%) - Ossie Fryer — 5 innings, 2 ducks (40%) - Terry Whittaker — 11 innings, 2 ducks (18.18%) Jim Hall shares top spot with John Thirkell on 3 apiece, though John has needed rather more innings to get there. Plenty of season left for a reshuffle. The next fixture awaits, and with it, the next round of nominees for the exclusive zero club. Bring your bat. Or don't bother. 🦆 0️⃣

A cracking few days for the exclusive zero club, with seven noughts harvested across four fixtures. The art of not scoring was alive and well at Linton Park this week. 🏏 Saturday 1st July — 1st XI v East Sussex CC (home) Alan Cridland fell lbw to G Collins, his 2nd duck of the season and 3rd of a career now standing at 20 innings — a tidy 15% strike rate for nought, good enough for 96th of 825 in the all-time reckoning. On this very day in 1962, Len Conway (1954–1965) suffered the same fate, one of the 12 that carried him to 29th on the eternal list. Fred Greenfield edged behind for nought moments later — his 2nd of the season, 12th of a career that has already earned him a place among the Retirement Duck club, that solemn order of those presumed finished off by a duck. Evidently the presumption was premature, as he's very much still opening his shoulders in 1967. Fred moves to 27th all-time, and shares his own 1962 echo with Len Conway. 🏏 Sunday 2nd July — 1st XI v Canterbury Pilgrims (home) Jim Hall was bowled by R Gawler for his 2nd duck of the weekend — and, extraordinarily, the 2nd innings of his entire LPCC career. Two knocks, two noughts, a flawless (if inverted) 100% record that already props up a groaning honours shelf: Debutante Duck, Full House nearly-man, top-ten billing in the Ducks on the Road, Homebody and Lone Duck charts, and Quacking Together links to half the clubhouse. On this day in 1955, G Hill made the first and only duck of his own brief career. Mike Iliffe departed bowled for his 1st of the season and 6th overall from 21 innings, edging him to 62nd all-time — level company with the great Ossie Fryer waiting in the wings below. Derry Evans was caught for his 1st duck of the season, 3rd in 19 career innings, sitting 103rd on the honours board. 🏏 Wednesday 5th July — Midweek XI v Gravesend CC (away) C Brock marked his LPCC debut in the most traditional way possible — bowled by H Eve without troubling the scorers. Straight onto the Debutante Duck board on his very first appearance, and for now his entire career reads a perfect 1 duck from 1 innings — proper initiation rites. On this day in 1943, Herbert Sunley made his own duck against Mr Ashby's XI. Ossie Fryer followed him back, bowled for his 2nd duck of the season and 6th of his career from 17 innings, drawing level with Mike Iliffe on the all-time list at 63rd. 📊 Week in Summary Seven ducks from four matches — one fixture, mercifully, came away completely duck-free. A fine week's work for the collection. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. John Thirkell — 3 ducks from 15 innings (20%) 2. Jim Hall — 2 ducks from 2 innings (100%) 3. Ossie Fryer — 2 ducks from 4 innings (50%) 4. Alan Cridland — 2 ducks from 5 innings (40%) 5. Terry Whittaker — 2 ducks from 9 innings (22%) 🥇 Jim Hall sits menacingly atop the strike-rate charts on a perfect record — can anyone catch him before the season's out? See you all next weekend, when the zero club will no doubt be recruiting again. 🦆🍩

A rare and faintly troubling week for the Duck Club: two fixtures played, and not a single nought to show for it. Every bat in action found some way, however scrappy, to trouble the scorer. The zero club's membership committee sat idle this week, quill dry, ledger unmoved. Make no mistake, this is not cause for celebration. A quiet week for ducks is a quiet week for the art of not scoring, and the art of not scoring is what we're here for. Somewhere out there, bowlers will be feeling rather hard done by — full tosses left unrewarded, outside edges falling safe, the odd shout for LBW waved away by umpires apparently allergic to drama. We live in hope that normal service, and its accompanying ignominy, resumes shortly. 0️⃣🏏 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🏏0️⃣ 1. John Thirkell — 3 ducks from 13 innings (23.08%) 2. Paul Bowles — 2 ducks from 8 innings (25.0%) 3. Terry Whittaker — 2 ducks from 9 innings (22.22%) 4. Frank Brattle — 2 ducks from 14 innings (14.29%) 5. Jim Hall — 1 duck from a single innings — a flawless 100% strike rate, the purest possible entry into this table and a mark the rest of the chasing pack can only dream of matching Paul Bowles nips ahead of Terry Whittaker on strike rate alone despite fewer innings played, while Frank Brattle's volume keeps him in the frame even as his percentage lags the leaders. John Thirkell sits pretty at the summit for now, but with the season still very much alive there's ample time yet for a changing of the guard. A word of caution to the pack, though — a fallow week is exactly the moment a challenger sharpens their bat, or more accurately, forgets how to use it. The next fixture will offer fresh opportunity for someone to remind us all why this club exists. Pads on, gloves ready, and here's hoping the ducks return to form before we do. 🦆🍩

Three matches, five ducks, and the 1st XI cornering the market entirely this week — the 2nd, 3rd and Sunday sides apparently minding their manners. Let's get into it. 🏏 Saturday 17 June — Tovil Nomads CC (h) A proper triple quack at home, three ducks in the one innings. Benny Bell went first, caught Archer bowled Banes for his 1st duck of the season and 6th of an increasingly distinguished career (24 innings, 54th of 823 all-time). Paul Bowles followed, bowled Hitchen, his 2nd of the season and 9th overall from 39 innings, 40th on the all-time list. Reigning Duck of the Year 1966, a fixture of the Ducks on the Road top 10, and one half of Only Two Quacks with Adam Pooley — the man collects silverware for not scoring. Then Brian Relf, at number 10 no less, bowled Morrison for his 1st of the season and 20th of a storied career, 42 innings, a mighty 13th all-time. A Debutante Duck, a Quack-to-Quack graduate, one half of Quacking Together with Terry Whittaker, and a Retirement Duck alumnus besides — there is barely room left on his honours board for a name plate. Remarkably, all three found the same historical bedfellow: on this very day in 1939, X Rayner (1939–1963, himself a Retirement Duck) also departed for nought against Castle Hill CC, Kent. Twenty-eight years on and the echo carries. 🌱 Sunday 18 June — Bobbing Court CC (a) Richard Ashby, in at 9, was caught Bourne bowled Kendall for his 1st duck of the season and 19th career from 103 innings, 15th of 823 all-time — a Ducks in a Row (5 consecutive) man and Tourist Duck top 10 regular. On this day in 1961, Robert Murray (1958–1965) made his own duck against Halfway House, one of 17 in a career that sits 18th all-time. 🌙 Thursday 22 June — The Mote CC (a) Frank Brattle, bowled Eddie Page at first drop, took his 2nd duck of the season and 30th overall from 266 innings — a lofty 6th of 823 all-time, elite company indeed. And rather beautifully, on this exact date in 1935, his own kinsman Percy Brattle also made a duck, against Bearsted CC — 32 years to the day, and evidently something in the blood. 📊 Week in Summary Five ducks, three matches, one glorious cluster at Tovil Nomads doing most of the damage. The 1st XI has, for one week at least, made the art of not scoring a team sport. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. John Thirkell — 3 ducks / 12 innings (25.0%) 2. Paul Bowles — 2 ducks / 7 innings (28.57%) 3. Terry Whittaker — 2 ducks / 8 innings (25.0%) 4. Frank Brattle — 2 ducks / 12 innings (16.67%) 5. Jim Hall — 1 duck / 1 innings (100.0%) Next fixture awaits, and the exclusive zero club never closes its books for long. Bring your bats, gentlemen — or don't bother. 🦆🍩0️⃣

Five for the collection this week as the Duck Club's summer campaign continues in fine, feathery form. The exclusive zero club welcomes both old hands and one very fresh face. 🏏 Saturday 10th — Tilling & Stevens CC (h) Paul Bowles departed lbw to D Ferguson at first wicket down, his 1st duck of the season and 8th of an increasingly distinguished LPCC career from 38 innings — 47th on the all-time roll of dubious honour. The reigning Duck of the Year (1966), a fixture of the Ducks on the Road top ten, and a proud co-holder of Only Two Quacks alongside Adam Pooley, Paul can also reflect that on this very day in 1961 a young Robert Wood was doing precisely the same thing against Tovil, en route to 21 career ducks of his own. Terry Groves followed him back moments later, caught Maskell bowled Seager for his 1st LPCC duck from just 4 innings — 351st on the leaderboard and a fine way to introduce himself to the club's finer traditions. He too keeps Wood's 1961 company on the calendar, if not yet in the runs column. 🌱 Sunday 11th — Hartley Country Club CC (a) C Cooper enjoyed himself away from home, claiming a full set of three. Terry Whittaker chipped a simple return to Pateman off Cooper for his 2nd duck of the season and 22nd of a storied career — good enough for 10th all-time. Terry carries Quacking Together honours alongside Brian Relf and a Retirement Duck credential from a past farewell. Twelve years to the week earlier, in 1955, Bob Arnold was falling to the same fate against Headcorn on his way to a scarcely believable 47. Then came Jim Hall — making his LPCC debut and marking it in the purest Duck Club fashion, caught Thornwell bowled Cooper for nought first innings, straight onto the Debutante Duck board. A remarkably decorated arrival for a single knock: already inside the Ducks on the Road, Tourist Duck, Homebody Duck and Lone Duck top tens, a Full House nearly-man on 10 of 11 positions, Only Two Quacks pairings with Allan Cooper and Nigel Thirkell, and Quacking Together company in Jon Harris, Martin Mears and Tim Thirkell. Rarely has a first appearance been so thoroughly furnished. Welcome to the family, Jim — also, by happy coincidence, another member of Bob Arnold's 1955 dining club. Ossie Fryer completed Cooper's clean sweep, bowled for his 5th career duck from 16 innings — 70th all-time — and the third man this weekend to keep Arnold's ghost company. 📋 Third fixture of the weekend passed without incident — the Duck Club's one blank across three matches. Week in summary: 5 ducks from 3 matches, one debutant safely inducted, and one bowler doing all the damage on Sunday. Consistency of a very particular kind. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - John Thirkell — 9 innings, 3 ducks (33%) - Terry Whittaker — 7 innings, 2 ducks (29%) - Derek Pantony — 1 innings, 1 duck (100%) - Jim Hall — 1 innings, 1 duck (100%) - Ossie Fryer — 3 innings, 1 duck (33%) Thirkell holds the summit for now, but with Whittaker closing and a fresh debutant already off the mark in the worst way, the race for 1967 is wide open. Same time next week — bring your bats, or don't bother 🥇🍩0️⃣

Four matches, four ducks, and the exclusive zero club welcomes its latest inductees. All the damage this week came courtesy of the 1st XI, who evidently decided one team could shoulder the full weight of the club's dubious distinction. 1st XI 🍩 Saturday's trip to Tovil Nomads CC opened the account: Alan Cridland, batting at five, was bowled by M Taylor without scoring — his 1st duck of the season and 2nd of a career now standing at 18 innings, good enough (or bad enough) for 125th on the all-time list. Fittingly, on this very day back in 1961, Brian Relf was suffering the identical fate against A. Trembeths, en route to a career total of 19 ducks and 14th place in the pantheon. 🍩 Sunday away at Hythe CC brought Stan Wratten to the crease at four, caught off P Ireland's bowling — though the scorebook, in a nice show of solidarity with the batsman, couldn't quite agree by whom. His 1st duck of the season and 28th of a career spanning 272 innings lifts him to 7th on the all-time roll, a proud paid-up member of the Quacking Together club alongside John Ames. On this very date in 1898, C S Smith was doing precisely the same against Sutton Valence School. 0️⃣0️⃣ And then, inevitably, John Thirkell — the club's undisputed all-time No.1 duck-getter — turned Monday and Tuesday into a two-part masterclass in the art of not scoring. Away at Primrose & Len CC he was bowled by S Stephens for his 2nd duck of the season and 59th of his career; barely 24 hours later, at home to Civil Service CC, Kent, he was caught and bowled by J Wood for nought again — his 3rd of the season and 60th career duck, a grim pair to close the week. The 1967 Duck of the Year title looks increasingly his to lose, and he already sits proudly among the Ducks on the Road, Homebody Duck and Lone Duck top tens, with Quacking Together honours alongside both Bob Arnold and William Buck. History kept pace too — on this day in 1965, Brian Relf ducked against Tovil and Bridge, while on this day in 1903, George Champion fell for nought against Town Malling CC. Week in Summary Four fixtures, four ducks, and remarkably one man responsible for half of them. No golden ducks recorded this week — every batsman at least troubled the bowlers before departing empty-handed, which by Duck Club standards counts as admirable restraint. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 🏏 1. John Thirkell — 3 ducks in 7 innings (42.9%) 2. Derek Pantony — 1 duck in 1 innings (100%) 3. Alan Cridland — 1 duck in 3 innings (33.3%) 4. Dick Langridge — 1 duck in 3 innings (33.3%) 5. Stan Wratten — 1 duck in 3 innings (33.3%) Thirkell's stranglehold on top spot looks secure for now, but the season is young and the zero club never sleeps. Bring your bats, gentlemen — or don't, there's always room at the crease for one more. See you next weekend for the next instalment of triumph through adversity. 🦆🥇

A quiet festival of noughts this week, but the 1st XI made sure the honours board didn't go entirely unfed. Three ducks across two fixtures — modest by Linton standards, but every one of them adds a brick to the wall. 🏏 Saturday 28th — The Mote CC (away) Fred Greenfield, in at five, departed b P Stewart without troubling the scorers. His 1st duck of the summer takes him to 11 for his career from 74 innings — 30th on the all-time list, a spot he shares in spirit with fellow member of the exclusive Retirement Duck club, a fraternity of those who bowed out on a nought at some point in their Linton days (Fred's own farewell, should it come, remains safely in the future). Neatly enough, on this very date in 1928 — thirty-nine years to the day — Bert Buckoke also strolled back for nought, against Bearsted CC of all sides. Buckoke went on to a 25-year Linton career (1928–1953), twice crowned Duck of the Year, and sits just four ducks and four places above Fred at 26th overall. History, as ever, keeps impeccable notes. 🏏 Sunday 29th — Bearsted CC (home) Two for the price of one at home to Bearsted. Dick Langridge, also batting five, went lbw to Ian Lambert for his 1st duck of the season — his 15th in Linton colours from 83 innings, good enough for 19th on the all-time roll. A chip off the old block, too: his relative Barry Langridge is already a paid-up duck-club member in his own right with 6 to his name. Batting at eight, Terry Whittaker was stumped — Peter Johnson keeping, Bryan Elswood the bowler — for his own 1st of the season and 21st for his career from 180 innings, vaulting him to a lofty 11th overall. Terry carries two honours on his lapel already: a lifetime member of the Retirement Duck club, and one half of "Quacking Together" alongside club stalwart Brian Relf, a pairing forged over the years rather than this weekend. Both Dick and Terry, as it happens, share their moment in history with the very same man — on this day in 1937, E Hayes made a duck against Charles Arkcoll, one of two Duck of the Year seasons (1937 and 1939) in a brief but fruitful 1935–1939 stint. Two Linton men, thirty years apart, keeping the same calendar appointment. 📊 Week in Summary Two matches, three ducks, zero survivors past the first over of misfortune for any of our three victims worth remarking on. All three fell to catches, lbw or the gloves rather than bowled — proof, if any were needed, that the art of not scoring comes in many disciplines. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard — Top 5 - Derek Pantony — 1 innings, 1 duck (100%) - Dick Langridge — 3 innings, 1 duck (33%) - Terry Whittaker — 3 innings, 1 duck (33%) - Fred Greenfield — 4 innings, 1 duck (25%) - John Thirkell — 4 innings, 1 duck (25%) Early days yet in the 1967 race — plenty of time for someone to pull clear. 🥇 Fixtures continue apace, and with them, inevitably, more additions to the club roll. Pad up, gentlemen — the ducks are watching. 🦆🍩

A single fixture on the books this week, and for once the Duck Club must report a genuinely quiet weekend. Every batsman who walked to the crease on the 22nd contrived, by hook or by crook, to trouble the scorers at least once. Not a single nought to log, not one dismal march back to the pavilion for the honours board to feast on. The Club regrets to inform its membership that the ducks evaded capture entirely this week. 🍩0️⃣ Whether this reflects a sudden and alarming outbreak of competence, or simply beginner's luck against modest bowling, is not for this correspondent to say. Normal service — the fine art of not scoring — will no doubt resume shortly. Still, the exclusive zero club never truly rests, and the season standings remain there to be admired, feared, or quietly avoided depending on your current tally. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Derek Pantony — 1 innings, 1 duck, a flawless 100% strike rate. A statistician's nightmare and, dare we say, an early clubhouse legend in the making. - Robert Chance — 3 innings, 1 duck, 33.33%. One in three isn't a habit yet, but the Club is watching closely. - John Thirkell — 4 innings, 1 duck, 25%. Comfortably in mid-table mediocrity, in the good way. - Frank Brattle — 5 innings, 1 duck, 20%. The most restrained of this week's leaders, ducking only when truly necessary. A tidy top of the table for now, though with the season still young there's ample time for reshuffling, ambush and the odd king pair to upend it all. So — nothing to celebrate this week in the traditional sense, but a golden opportunity for someone to remind us why the Duck Club exists in the first place. The next fixture awaits, the bowlers are sharpening up, and somewhere out there a golden duck is surely queuing to happen. Get out there and give the scorers something to write home about. 🦆🏏

A quiet week in the exclusive zero club, but never let it be said the ducks stood entirely still. 🏏 1st XI — away at Rumwood CC, 13th May Batting at ten, Derek Pantony departed caught J Carter bowled P Williams, adding his name to this season's roll of dishonour. It's his 1st duck of the summer and his 13th in an LPCC career now spanning 41 innings — a tally that plants him a very respectable 24th of 821 in the all-time standings. Derek is already a fixture of the honours board, having lifted Duck of the Year all the way back in 1947, so this latest nought is less an initiation than a gentle reminder that some forms of consistency never fade. Spookily, on this very day back in 1961, William Agate (1960–1961) also trudged back for nought — against Charles Arkcoll, no less. The calendar, it seems, has a long memory even when the scorebook doesn't. 📅 Week in Summary Two matches, one duck — the rest of the club evidently kept its head down and got off the mark this week. Quality over quantity from the zero club, but the season is young yet and there's plenty of cricket left for the ducks to make up lost ground. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Derek Pantony — 1 innings, 1 duck (100%) - Robert Chance — 2 innings, 1 duck (50%) - John Thirkell — 3 innings, 1 duck (33%) - Frank Brattle — 5 innings, 1 duck (20%) Derek leads the early charge on a perfect record, though with only one innings on the board there's every chance the chasing pack overhauls him before the month is out. 🍩 Next fixture beckons, and with it fresh opportunity for the club's most dubious honour to find new recruits. Get out there and give us nothing, Linton. 🦆0️⃣

A single quack rang out from Linton Park this week, but what it lacked in volume it made up for in ceremony. One match, one duck, and a name well known to the exclusive zero club. 🏏 1st XI — Bobbing Court CC Robert Chance strode out at first wicket down and departed rather more briskly than he arrived, caught P Bedelle bowled M Kendall for a nought that will nonetheless be logged with due solemnity. It's his 1st duck of the 1967 campaign and the 2nd of an already storied career spanning 30 innings, easing him to 174th of 820 in the all-time standings — respectable company for a man clearly practising the art of not scoring. Robert also carries lifetime membership of the club's Retirement Duck honours board, a farewell earned in some previous innings entirely and not, we stress, anything happening this week. He's not going anywhere yet — there's more not-scoring to be done. And in a pleasing quirk of the calendar, on this very day back in 1955 one William Blight (1953–1959) was completing an identical ritual, on his way to 10 career ducks and a very creditable 35th of 820 all-time. Some traditions, it seems, are simply written into the fixture list. 📊 Week in Summary One match, one duck — a quiet week by Duck Club standards, but a quality entry rather than a quantity one. Sometimes it only takes a single nought to remind the club why the honours board exists. 🦆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Robert Chance — 1 duck / 2 innings (50%) 2. Frank Brattle — 1 duck / 3 innings (33.33%) 3. John Thirkell — 1 duck / 3 innings (33.33%) A tight scrap at the top, with Robert setting the early pace on percentage alone. Plenty of season left for the chasing pack to make their move. See you at the next fixture, where the bowlers will no doubt be keen to add a few more names to the register. The Duck Club never sleeps. 🦆🍩

Two fixtures on the books this weekend, and Maidstone AKCC proved the reliable source of ignominy, claiming both of Linton's noughts inside the same 1st XI innings on the 30th. 1st XI At number four, John Thirkell fell b R Simmonds for a duck — his 1st of the new 1967 season, and the 58th of a career that now sits, remarkably, at rank 1 of 820 in the all-time Linton standings. The undisputed King of Ducks arrives already a three-time Duck of the Year (1952, 1954, 1955), and with 1967 also inscribed on his board, wears this season's crown besides. Add memberships of the Ducks on the Road, Homebody Duck and Lone Duck top tens, plus twin "Quacking Together" honours shared with Bob Arnold and William Buck, and you have a portfolio most collectors would envy — provided the collection in question is made entirely of zeros. Neatly, on this very calendar date back in 1955, one John "--'s" Taylor also strolled back for nought against West Farleigh CC, 19th on the all-time list with 15 to his name. Two down at six, Frank Brattle followed him back, bowled by Micky Back for his 1st duck of the season and the 29th of his career, good enough for 6th on the all-time chart of 820. A chip off the old block, too — his parent Percy Brattle already carries 5 career ducks, proof the art of not scoring runs in the family. Frank shares his historical echo with his own captain: it was also 30 April 1955 when that same John "--'s" Taylor made his duck at West Farleigh — evidently a fine day for bad batting, whichever era you're in. Week in Summary Two matches, two ducks, both surrendered in the same 1st XI innings against Maidstone AKCC — proof that when Linton commit to the art of not scoring, they prefer to do it as a pair. A quiet weekend numerically, but with the all-time number one and number six both topping up their tallies in the same session, a historically weighty one all the same. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Frank Brattle — 2 innings, 1 duck (50%) 1. John Thirkell — 2 innings, 1 duck (50%) Early doors yet in the 1967 hunt, honours currently shared at the top. Plenty of season left for someone to break clear — or for Maidstone AKCC to come calling again. See you next fixture, when the ducks will no doubt keep on quacking. 🦆🍩0️⃣