🦆 The Duck Pond

A single fixture out on the park this week, and for once the exclusive zero club had absolutely nothing to report. Not a golden duck, not a king pair, not so much as a single nervous nought to log in the honours books. The ducks, it seems, evaded capture entirely. Whether this was a triumph of application, a shortage of hostile bowling, or simply everyone remembering which end of the bat to hold, we cannot say. What we can say is that somewhere out there a Duck Club scout went home with an empty net and a heavy heart. A quiet week for the art of not scoring — but the season is far from over, and complacency has been the downfall of many a fine ducker before. Rest assured, normal service will resume. It always does. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 2009 🏏 🥇 Jamie Ratcliffe — 5 ducks in 15 innings (33.33%) 🥈 Ryan Boyns — 5 ducks in 26 innings (19.23%) 🥉 Richard Piper — 5 ducks in 38 innings (13.16%) 4️⃣ Trevor Back — 4 ducks in 20 innings (20.0%) 5️⃣ Chris Newman — 4 ducks in 23 innings (17.39%) Jamie Ratcliffe leads the way with a fearsome one-in-three strike rate — the kind of consistency that gets a man noticed, for all the wrong reasons. Ryan Boyns and Richard Piper sit level on 5 apiece, though Piper's done it across more than double the innings, which either shows admirable restraint or a stubborn refusal to learn. Trevor Back and Chris Newman lurk just behind, both very much live in the race for Duck of the Year. 🍩 Next fixture, normal transmission resumes — someone, somewhere, will oblige. The nets are out, the scorebook is open, and the 0️⃣ awaits its next volunteer. See you out there.

Two fixtures on the go this weekend, and the ducks kept a low profile, offering the Club just a single casualty. Quality over quantity, evidently — Saturday's lot batted through unscathed, leaving Sunday to do all the work. Sunday 1st XI v Tenterden CC In at number four, Jamie Ratcliffe departed to a catch credited, magnificently, to "Unsure" off the bowling of Richard Pearman — out for nought, his 5th duck of the season and, remarkably, his 5th of his entire LPCC career too. Every single one of Jamie's ducks has come this very year, in just his 26th innings for the club, which puts him 159th of 1377 in the all-time standings. And since we're still very much in 2009, that Duck of the Year 2009 board entry isn't a dusty old honour — it's live, and Jamie's sitting right on top of it. He joins exalted company on that tally: Ron McCormick, a Linton stalwart from 1991 right through to 2009, also settled on exactly 5 career ducks — though it took him 141 innings to get there, one place back at 166th. Jamie's arriving at the same destination considerably quicker, for better or worse. A word for the family tree while we're here — Jamie's sibling Paul Ratcliffe carries a single career duck of his own, evidently the more restrained of the two, at least so far. Week in Summary One duck from two matches — the flock mostly gave the slip this weekend, but Jamie Ratcliffe kept the books open for business. A quiet round by Duck Club standards, though the season race is very much alive. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 2009 - Jamie Ratcliffe — 5 ducks / 15 innings (33.33%) - Ryan Boyns — 5 ducks / 26 innings (19.23%) - Richard Piper — 5 ducks / 37 innings (13.51%) - Trevor Back — 4 ducks / 20 innings (20.00%) - Tom Murphy — 4 ducks / 22 innings (18.18%) Jamie now leads outright on ducks and boasts the highest strike rate at nought of the entire top five — a genuine triumph through adversity as the Duck of the Year 2009 race heats up. 🍩 Roll on the next fixture — the exclusive zero club always has room for one more. See you all out there, and good luck avoiding it (or joining in, we don't judge) 🏏0️⃣

A quiet weekend for the hunters, but the zero club still signed up two fresh recruits to its dubious ranks. 🏏 Saturday — 1st XI v Headcorn CC Joshua Knowler strode out at seven and departed for nought, bowled by Lance Grist. It's his first season duck and, tellingly, his first career one too — from 11 innings, he lands at 528th of 1375 in the all-time table. Neat symmetry there: on this very day back in 1959, S Lusher was doing precisely the same thing against Bowaters CC, also opening his account at duck number one. Joshua's dad Richard Knowler already carries 2 career ducks of his own, so the family clearly believes in leading by example. 🌱 Sunday — Sunday 1st XI v Anchorians CC Sam Boyns came in at nine and went for a duck, caught by S McKechnie off D Thompson — his maiden season duck and maiden career duck from 7 innings, settling in at 616th of 1375 all time. On this exact day in 2003, Christopher Thirkell suffered the same fate against Upchurch CC on his way to 25 career ducks and the 2005 Duck of the Year crown — a fair distance ahead of Sam for now. Keep half an eye on the surname though: brother Ryan Boyns already owns 8 career ducks and currently leads this season's chart below, while dad Alan Boyns sits on a formidable 21. Sam has joined a well-stocked family trophy cabinet. 📋 Week in Summary Two matches, two ducks, one apiece — no pairs, no family doubles this week, just two players quietly opening their 2009 accounts. Modest pickings, but every duck dynasty starts with a single nought. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Ryan Boyns — 5 ducks, 26 inns (19.23%) - Richard Piper — 5 ducks, 37 inns (13.51%) - Jamie Ratcliffe — 4 ducks, 14 inns (28.57%) - Trevor Back — 4 ducks, 20 inns (20.0%) - Tom Murphy — 4 ducks, 21 inns (19.05%) Ryan Boyns tops the table while his brother Sam has just joined the club downstairs — will the Boyns household sweep the board before the season's out? The zero club never closes its books. Next fixture, more victims await. 🦆🍩

A rare and faintly unsettling weekend at Linton Park: three fixtures played across the 5th and 6th, and not a single duck to show for it. The exclusive zero club convened, checked the sign-in sheet, and found nobody waiting. Somewhere out there, elite bowling units will be furious. Eleven-a-side batting line-ups up and down the club got off the mark and stayed there, robbing the honours board of its natural weekly intake. Even Duck Club regulars, usually so reliable in their unreliability, found a way to nudge one off the square. Consistency of a very particular kind, temporarily suspended. We shan't pretend to enjoy it. The art of not scoring is a proud LPCC tradition and this week it simply wasn't practised. Ducks: 0. Matches: 3. Vibes: unnervingly competent. Still, the season race rages on regardless, and the current pack is not resting on its non-laurels. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 🥇🍩 - Ryan Boyns — 5 ducks from 26 innings (19.23%) - Richard Piper — 5 ducks from 35 innings (14.29%) - Jamie Ratcliffe — 4 ducks from 14 innings (28.57%) — the field's most efficient collector by some distance - Tom Murphy — 4 ducks from 20 innings (20.0%) - Trevor Back — 4 ducks from 20 innings (20.0%) Ryan Boyns holds a narrow lead on ducks banked, but Jamie Ratcliffe's strike rate is the number that should worry every new-ball bowler in the league — nearly three in every ten trips to the crease ending in triumph through adversity. Tom Murphy and Trevor Back sit locked together at 20%, a dead heat nobody asked for and everybody in the Duck Club will be watching closely. A quiet week, then, but never fear — form is temporary, and the next fixture is never more than a nervy forward defensive away from restocking the tally. Pads on, gloves ready, and here's hoping the bowlers remember how it's done. 🦆

A rare and frankly suspicious turn of events at Linton Park this weekend: across both fixtures, not a single soul troubled the scorers for nought. Two full matches, and the exclusive zero club gained not one new entrant, not one repeat offender, nothing. 🍩0️⃣ The art of not scoring, it seems, took the weekend off. Whether this was due to uncharacteristically watchful batting, generous bowling, or simply the Duck Club's usual suspects deciding discretion was the better part of valour, we cannot say. What we can say is that somewhere out there, Ryan Boyns, Richard Piper and company will have breathed a small sigh of relief — their season tallies remain untouched, at least for now. Do not, however, mistake this for the ducks being extinct. They are merely regrouping. History teaches us that a quiet weekend is usually the lull before a spectacular quack-up, and with the season hurtling toward its business end, the leaderboard below remains very much live. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Ryan Boyns — 5 ducks / 26 innings (19.23%) - Richard Piper — 5 ducks / 33 innings (15.15%) - Jamie Ratcliffe — 4 ducks / 14 innings (28.57%) - Trevor Back — 4 ducks / 19 innings (21.05%) - Tom Murphy — 4 ducks / 20 innings (20.00%) Ratcliffe still holds the grim honour of the highest strike rate for failure among the leading pack, nearly one in three visits to the crease ending in ignominy — a statistic the rest of the top five will be quietly grateful not to match this week. So, members, treat this as a phoney war. The ducks are out there, sharpening their beaks, waiting for next weekend's fixtures to restore order to the natural universe. Pads on, guard taken, and may fortune desert at least one of you in the traditional manner. 🏏🦆

Saturday, Staplehurst 🏏 The 1st XI's top order sprang two leaks away at Staplehurst. David Castle, opening, was held at slip — ct John Swannick b R Clarke — for his 3rd duck of the season and 43rd of a long and storied career, keeping him lodged at 16th of 1375 in the all-time roll and comfortably inside the Tourist Duck top 10 for miles racked up doing this on the road. Spookily, on this very date back in 1953, J Barclay was also trudging off for nought, against Charles Arkcoll — the calendar has a long memory. Laurie Probert followed him back, bowled Steven Wright, for a 2nd duck of the season and 2nd of his career from 33 innings, sitting at 312th of 1375. He keeps identical company with Castle on the 1953 echo — a fine year for failing to score, evidently. Sunday, Old Elthamians 🍩 The 2nd XI's reply included two early departures. Lewis Burnham was snapped up — ct Ben Daniels b Josh Forde — his 2nd duck of the season and career alike, from just 16 innings, moving to 313th of 1375. He's a fully paid-up member of the Retirement Duck club from a past farewell, though nobody's suggesting today was it. On this same date in 1981, Brian Piper was likewise back in the pavilion against Old Anchorians CC. Jamie Ratcliffe went next — ct Simon Webb b Paul Daniels — his 4th of the season, and 4th of his career from a brisk 25 innings, ranking 183rd of 1375. That's enough to keep his name on this year's Duck of the Year 2009 board, a title he shares no small irony in given his sibling Paul Ratcliffe is himself carrying a career duck. Jamie now sits level on career tally with Iain Cardew (1994–2009, 37 innings) — kindred spirits four noughts apiece. Midweek, Hartley Country Club 0️⃣ Michael Beeney went first ball — a proper golden duck, bowled Simon Clark without troubling the scorers — his 2nd of the season and a hefty 31st for the club, keeping him 29th of 1375 all-time. A veteran of the Diamond Duck board for a scoreless 2002 special and the Only Two Quacks pairing with Ian Brattle, Michael also has a chip off the old block watching on in son Thomas Beeney, who carries 12 career noughts of his own. On this day in 1979, no less a figure than Tim Thirkell — the club's all-time number three duck-getter — also fell for nought, against Old Anchorians CC. Week in brief Five ducks from four matches, spread evenly across bat and ball's usual indifference — no pairs, no family affairs this week, just honest individual application to the art of not scoring. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 1. Ryan Boyns — 5 ducks, 26 innings, 19.23% 2. Richard Piper — 5 ducks, 32 innings, 15.63% 3. Jamie Ratcliffe — 4 ducks, 14 innings, 28.57% 4. Trevor Back — 4 ducks, 18 innings, 22.22% 5. Tom Murphy — 4 ducks, 20 innings, 20.0% Ratcliffe's strike rate for failure is the frightening one on that list. Boyns and Piper still lead the race outright, but the season has plenty left to run. Next fixture, the ducks will no doubt keep hatching — see you at the crease. 🦆

A quieter week in the hunting grounds — just four matches and a modest three ducks — but each one came with a story worth telling. Saturday 15 August 1st XI away at Leeds & Broomfield CC, and Adrian Samson clearly fancied his chances against the middle order. Craig Sands went first, departing at six for nought, caught Daren Hunt bowled Samson 🏏🍩. His second duck of the season and his 12th in an admirably durable Linton career spanning 279 innings — good enough for 80th on the all-time chart. He now sits level on 12 with Thomas Beeney, a fixture of the 2000-2009 sides across 61 innings, himself a paid-up member of the Debutante Duck club and the Ducks on the Road top 10. One place down the order, Ryan Boyns followed him straight back to the pavilion, caught Richard Turner bowled Samson for nought. It's his 5th duck of the season 🥇 — enough to draw him level at the very top of this year's Duck Hunting Season table alongside Richard Piper, though Boyns gets there in a rather more brutal fashion, needing just 23 innings to Piper's 32 for a fearsome 21.74% strike rate. His career tally advances to 8, matching Adam Jackson (2001-2007, 87 innings). Keeping it in the family too — father Alan Boyns carries 21 career ducks of his own, so the eye for a golden opportunity to nick off clearly runs in the blood. Sunday 16 August Sunday 2nd XI at home to Benenden CC produced one further casualty. Gareth Davies fell at number ten, bowled Ben Stone for a duck 0️⃣ — his first of the season and 11th of a 64-innings Linton career, 90th on the all-time list. He now shares that tally with Andrew Moss, a name from the club's 1968-2008 era, who eventually bowed out on a duck himself and carries the Retirement Duck honour for it. Week in summary Three ducks from four matches, with Leeds & Broomfield doing the damage twice off the same over-worked bowler — Samson clearly earning his tea that day. The season race, meanwhile, is heating up nicely at the top. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🏆 1. Ryan Boyns — 5 ducks, 23 innings (21.74%) 2. Richard Piper — 5 ducks, 32 innings (15.63%) 3. Trevor Back — 4 ducks, 17 innings (23.53%) 4. Chris Newman — 4 ducks, 19 innings (21.05%) 5. Tom Murphy — 4 ducks, 19 innings (21.05%) A tight scrap for top spot in the exclusive zero club, and with plenty of season left, nobody's tally is safe. Get down to the next fixture and see who joins the honours board — the art of not scoring waits for no one 🦆

Six matches, eight ducks, and the exclusive zero club welcomed old regulars and one brand new face this week. As ever, the art of not scoring was practised with real commitment. 🏏 Saturday 8th — 2nd XI at Sheldwich CC Nick Cork enjoyed a fine afternoon's poultry farming, accounting for two Linton batsmen in the same innings. Trevor Back was first to go, bowled by Cork for his 4th duck of the season and a formidable 68th career duck — 5th in the all-time standings out of 1,375, and a fixture on the Ducks on the Road, Homebody Duck and Lone Duck top tens. On this very day in 1998, Richard Piper was making his own contribution to the cause against Bearsted CC — good company to keep. Ian Hollingworth followed him back to the pavilion for his 2nd duck of the season and 10th career, drawing level on that tally with Gareth Davies (2003–2009, 63 innings). 🌾 Wednesday 12th — Midweek XI at The Mote CC Ryan Boyns notched his 4th duck of the season, bowled by Jack Field, and moves to 7 career ducks — level with Iain Rawson (2006–2009). A chip off the old block, too: his relative Alan Boyns carries 21 career ducks of his own. 🏏 Sunday 9th — 1st XI at Newington CC A golden duck to open the account — Ray Dixon, bowled by Jim Brock first ball faced, his 1st of the season and 11th career, level with Andrew Moss (1968–2008). Ray already sits on the Duck of the Year 2007 honours board — form is temporary, class apparently permanent. Will Thew made his LPCC debut and promptly ran himself out for nought — a genuine arrival on the Debutante Duck board, his very first innings for the club. On this day in 1964, John Thirkell, the club's all-time leader with 90, was doing exactly the same against Harrietsham. Alan Probert also fell, bowled by Simon Doncaster, his 1st duck of the season and 2nd of a fledgling two-innings career — already a paid-up member of both the Debutante Duck and Retirement Duck honours boards, level on tally with Graham Walker (1998–2007). 🏏 Sunday 9th — 2nd XI at Speldhurst CC Jordan Austin was held in the field without scoring, his 1st duck of the season and career, joining the Homebody Duck and Lone Duck top tens for company. Matthew Taylor was stumped for nought, his own maiden career duck. Both keep company with John Thirkell, also dismissed for nought on this date back in 1964 — clearly an unlucky week in Linton history. 📊 Week in Summary Eight ducks from six matches, headlined by Nick Cork's brace at Sheldwich and a debutant's nought at Newington. Quantity over quality, as ever, in the pursuit of the zero. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Richard Piper — 5 ducks / 30 inns (16.7%) 2. Trevor Back — 4 ducks / 16 inns (25.0%) 3. Chris Newman — 4 ducks / 18 inns (22.2%) 4. Tom Murphy — 4 ducks / 18 inns (22.2%) 5. Ryan Boyns — 4 ducks / 20 inns (20.0%) More opportunities await next week. The ducks never rest — and neither, it seems, do we. 🦆🍩

A quieter week in the exclusive zero club — just four new members processed across five fixtures — but each arrival came with fine company from the record books. Midweek XI 🏏 Tuesday's trip to Bexley CC claimed Tim Wright, stumped by Adrian Wiltshire off Daniel Johnson at number six. His 3rd duck of the season and 4th of a career now 51 innings deep, good enough for 194th on the all-time roll. He draws level on career ducks with Iain Cardew, who took 35 innings across his 1994–2009 stint to reach the same total — and who, rather grandly, sits on the Debutante Duck board for good measure. Sunday 1st XI 0️⃣ Away at Rodmersham CC, the top order took a battering. Richard Piper, bowled by Christopher Colman after three balls at number three, notched his 5th of the season and 52nd for his career — rank 10 of 1372, a Full House man, Duck of the Year 2003, and a permanent fixture on the Ducks on the Road, Homebody and Lone Duck top tens. Keeping it in the family, father Brian carries 23 career ducks of his own and brother James another 8 — a proper poultry dynasty. On this very day in 1944, E- Humphreys was doing much the same against the National Fire Service Overseas Contingent. Moments later Jamie Ratcliffe, caught and bowled by Dan Ansley after a defiant 19 balls, added his 3rd of the season and 3rd of his career from just 22 innings, rank 225 and freshly installed on the Duck of the Year 2009 shortlist. Brother Paul has 1 to his name. He joins Daniel McCarthy, who reached the same tally of 3 in 19 innings during his 2006–07 spell. Sunday 2nd XI 🥇 At home to Nuxley CC, Trevor Back was caught by Gary Reid off Duncan French. His 3rd of the season nudges his career tally to a mighty 67 — rank 5 of 1372, one of the true elder statesmen of the club's dubious distinction, present on the Ducks on the Road, Homebody Duck and Lone Duck top tens, and sharing honours in Only Two Quacks with Allan Cooper and Quacking Together with Jon Harris. Like Richard, he finds himself keeping company with E- Humphreys, on this day back in 1944. Week in summary 🍩 Four ducks, five matches — the art of not scoring showed restraint this week, but Rodmersham CC can claim a rare early-order double. Consistency of a very particular kind continues at Linton Park. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🏏 1. Richard Piper — 28 inns, 5 ducks (17.86%) 2. Tom Murphy — 17 inns, 4 ducks (23.53%) 3. Chris Newman — 18 inns, 4 ducks (22.22%) 4. Glen Rawson — 28 inns, 4 ducks (14.29%) 5. Jamie Ratcliffe — 11 inns, 3 ducks (27.27%) Next fixture looms, and with it another chance for someone to achieve triumph through adversity. The Duck Club never sleeps 🦆

A rare thing this week, ducklings: across four fixtures spanning Saturday to the Wednesday, the Club's exclusive zero club admitted just the one new devotee. Consistency, it seems, took a rare weekend off — though when the nought did arrive, it arrived with the Kent sunshine still out. 🏏 Midweek XI — Tour Match Temptation Facing the touring Ipswich Greyhounds CC's Kent Tour XI on home turf on the Wednesday, Craig Sands walked out at first drop and departed the way so many before him have — caught W Gunson, bowled Nathan Philpott. A tidy dismissal for the tourists, and a tidy addition to the club's ever-expanding membership roll. It's Craig's 1st duck of the 2009 campaign but by no means his first rodeo — this is career duck number 11 in 275 innings, lodging him at a very respectable 89th of 1372 in the all-time standings. That places him level on the exact same tally as Andrew Moss, who plied his trade for the club across four decades from 1968 to 2008 and reached his own 11 in a leaner 135 innings before signing off — fittingly — with a Retirement Duck to his name. Craig has plenty of batting left to beat that rate, but the company is distinguished nonetheless. 📊 Week in Summary One duck from four matches is a quiet return by Duck Club standards — the art of not scoring took a back seat this week while, presumably, actual runs were being scored elsewhere (most inconvenient). Still, one new entry keeps the ledger ticking over nicely, and the season race remains very much alive. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Chris Newman — 4 ducks in 15 innings (26.67%) - Tom Murphy — 4 ducks in 16 innings (25.00%) - Glen Rawson — 4 ducks in 27 innings (14.81%) - Richard Piper — 4 ducks in 27 innings (14.81%) - Matthew Carter — 3 ducks in 13 innings (23.08%) A tight tussle at the top, with Newman and Murphy setting the pace on ducks-per-innings while Rawson and Piper grind out theirs in the long form. Plenty of season left for the standings to be rewritten. 🏏 Looking Ahead Bats out, guards taken — the naughty nought never sleeps for long. Here's hoping (or fearing) next weekend's fixtures bring a fuller harvest for the honours board. Until then, 0️⃣🍩🦆

Eight ducks fell to the trap across four fixtures this weekend — a fine haul for the exclusive zero club. Saturday, 1st XI v Willesborough CC (h) Richard Piper departed first ball, ct Darren Stear b Callum Stuckey — his 4th duck of the season and 51st for the club from 432 innings, 11th on the all-time roll and a proud fixture of the Duck of the Year 2003, Full House and Lone Duck boards. He draws level on 51 with Ian Brattle (1973–2008), who somehow managed the feat in barely a third of the innings — some men are simply born to it. Nor is Piper alone in the family trade: a parent-child pairing with Brian Piper (23 career ducks) and a sibling account from James Piper (8) keep the name well represented. Saturday, 2nd XI v Mersham Sports CC (a) A bumper afternoon down at Mersham — four wickets, four ducks. Glen Rawson (ct Booth b Rose) posted his 4th of the season and 8th of his career from 82 innings, level with Adam Jackson (2001–2007). Will Thirkell (b Rose) took his 2nd of the season and career, a modest opening instalment against the towering family backdrop of Tim (84) and John (90) Thirkell — eight Thirkells now populate the club's duck ranks between them. Jamie Ratcliffe (ct Darlington b Cadogan) banked his 2nd of 2009, a season in which his name is already stamped on the Duck of the Year board. Lee Tidey (ct Douglas b Rogers) reached 3 career ducks, level with Daniel McCarthy (2006–2007). And on this very day back in 2007, Chris Newman was also trudging off against Lord Cornwallis XI — old habits die hard. Sunday, 1st XI v Blue Star CC (h) Tom Murphy (b Holman), opening the innings, fell for his 4th duck of the season and 11th of his career from 69 innings — level with Andrew Moss (1968–2008), who bowed out of his own Linton days on a duck. Sunday, 2nd XI v Boughton & Eastwell CC (a) Daniel Chadwick did the damage twice over: Ben Wells (bowled) and Martin Harris (run out) each notched their maiden career duck. Fittingly, both share the same historical parallel in Jon Harris, who made a duck on this exact day in 1975 — and who also happens to be Martin's own parent, sitting on 89 club ducks and 2nd on the all-time list. The art of not scoring, inherited. The Week in Brief Four matches, eight ducks, and Mersham doing the club's recruiting single-handedly with four in one innings. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Chris Newman — 4 ducks, 13 inns, 30.77% 2. Tom Murphy — 4 ducks, 15 inns, 26.67% 3. Richard Piper — 4 ducks, 25 inns, 16.0% 4. Glen Rawson — 4 ducks, 26 inns, 15.38% 5. Matthew Carter — 3 ducks, 12 inns, 25.0% Three of this weekend's fallen already prop up the top of the table — consistency of a very particular kind. Roll on next weekend — the traps are set again. 🦆🏏0️⃣

Six fixtures, eight ducks — and one West Farleigh bowler who fancied himself chief tormentor this week. The zero club welcomes its latest inductees. Saturday 11 July — 1st XI (away, West Farleigh CC) Ian Prideaux ran through the top order in style. David Castle went first, caught off Prideaux for their 2nd duck of the season and 42nd of their career — 17th all-time, a Tourist Duck top 10 regular, level on 42 with club legend Stewart Morrison (1987–2009). Ryan Boyns followed, caught off the same bowler for their 3rd of the season and 6th career duck — matching the very feat Mike Stephens managed against these same opponents back in 1967. Kin Alan Boyns, a parent, already carries 21 career ducks of their own. Michael Beeney completed Prideaux's hat-trick, bowled for their 1st of the season and 30th career duck — 30th all-time, and a holder of both the Diamond Duck (2002, first-baller) and Retirement Duck honours. Kin Thomas Beeney sits on 12 career ducks, and Michael too draws level with Stephens' 1967 vintage. Sunday 12 July — 2nd XI (away, Bidborough CC) Paul Ratcliffe opened their senior account, bowled for a 1st duck of the season and career alike — joining one-and-done merchant "- Howard" (2006) on exactly one. Sibling Jamie Ratcliffe shares the affliction, also on one. Sunday 12 July — NVKC (home, Glynde & Beddingham CC) James Piper was caught for their 1st of the season and 8th career duck, level with Adam Jackson (2001–2007) — with decorated kin besides, sibling Richard on 50 career ducks and parent Brian on 23. Paul Gibson was bowled for their 1st of the season, 30th career duck, 31st all-time — a Platinum Duck holder from 1991 for a first-ball dismissal — and, on this same date back in 1964, Len Conway was doing likewise at Claributs Circus. Chris Newman made it a busy summer — a 4th duck of the season, 22nd of the career, level with Peter Whyte (1987–2007) — and now sits top of the season leaderboard. Kin Clive Newman isn't far behind on 17. Tuesday 14 July — Twenty20 (away, Hollingbourne CC) Joe Martin was caught and bowled for a 1st duck of the season and 9th of the career, level with Ian Hollingworth (2004–2009) — a fellow paid-up member of the Debutante Duck club from their own long-ago first knock. Week in Summary Eight ducks, six matches, three claimed by a single West Farleigh over. No pairs, no family affairs this week — but Chris Newman's quartet has them leading the race for Duck of the Year. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard - Chris Newman — 4/13 (30.77%) - Matthew Carter — 3/12 (25.00%) - Ryan Boyns — 3/12 (25.00%) - Iain Rawson — 3/14 (21.43%) - Tom Murphy — 3/14 (21.43%) Next fixture, next queue outside the pavilion. The Duck Club always has room for one more. 🦆🏏0️⃣

A quiet weekend for the fowl-hunters by Linton standards — just three ducks harvested from four fixtures — but what the haul lacked in volume it made up for in pedigree. Two proper stalwarts and a rising contender all found their way into the book. Saturday 4 July — 2nd XI away at Staplehurst CC Gez Saunders had the beating of Linton's middle order twice over. First to fall was Trevor Back, caught G Hubbard off Saunders — his second duck of the season and 66th of an extraordinary career, keeping him lodged at 5th in the all-time charts. Trevor remains a fixture of the Ducks on the Road, Homebody Duck and Lone Duck top tens, with shared quacking honours alongside Allan Cooper and Jon Harris — a CV of futility most members can only dream of. Neatly enough, on this very day back in 1973, Cliff Anscombe was doing much the same against Northend Sunday. Saunders wasn't finished. Iain Rawson followed, trapped lbw for his third duck of the season and 7th of his career — pulling him level with his own brother Glen Rawson, who sits on exactly the same tally. A proper Rawson family stalemate on the duck front, and with Glen also propping up this week's season charts, the sibling rivalry shows no sign of a winner. Sunday 5 July — 1st XI away at The Mote CC Chris Newman completed the weekend's set, lbw to Danny Rowe for his third duck of the season — matching Iain Rawson stroke for stroke — and his 21st career nought, drawing level with club legend Alan Boyns, a man who took 205 innings to get there and once managed the rare feat of not facing a ball at all. Chris also carries kinship honours of his own, sharing the surname with fellow duck club member Clive Newman, who has 17 career ducks to his name. The week in brief Three ducks, four matches, and Gez Saunders doing the damage twice in a single Staplehurst innings — a fine afternoon's work for the opposition, a grim one for the Linton middle order. Fittingly, two of this week's victims — Chris Newman and Iain Rawson — currently share top spot in the season charts. The chase for Duck of the Year is very much alive. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Chris Newman — 9 inn, 3 ducks, 33.33% 2. Matthew Carter — 10 inn, 3 ducks, 30.00% 3. Iain Rawson — 11 inn, 3 ducks, 27.27% 4. Tom Murphy — 13 inn, 3 ducks, 23.08% 5. Glen Rawson — 21 inn, 3 ducks, 14.29% Five names locked on three apiece — it'll take a big weekend to break the deadlock. Next fixtures loom, and the exclusive zero club always has room for new arrivals. See you at the crease. 🦆🏏0️⃣

Four fresh entries onto the honours boards this week across six fixtures, as the Duck Club quietly went about its business while the rest of the club tried to score runs. Saturday — 1st XI at Cobham CC, Kent Tom Murphy fell for nought at three, caught Martin Corden bowled Danny Jarvis, his 3rd of the season and 10th of an increasingly distinguished career from 66 innings. That tally plants him 101st of 1372 in the all-time roll, drawing level with Craig Sands, who reached the same 10 in 264 innings across 2002–2009 — Tom got there rather more efficiently, for what dubious honour that's worth. Matthew Carter followed him back not long after, bowled Martin Corden at number 10, his 3rd of the campaign and 20th for the club overall. A paid-up member of the Debutante Duck club since his very first innings, and Duck of the Year back in 2004, though this week's effort is very much a repeat performance rather than a debut. Carter's 20 puts him 57th all-time, level with Chris Newman, who managed the same in a brisker 100 innings between 2002 and 2009. Sunday — 2nd XI v Chevening Amblers CC Tim Wright was caught and bowled by Roy Smithers at four, his 2nd duck of the season and 3rd of his career from 39 innings, ranking 245th of 1372. He joins Daniel McCarthy, who reached 3 in a mere 19 innings during his 2006–2007 spell — Tim's taking the scenic route to the same number. Sunday — NVKC v Fordham CC Ryan Boyns was caught Darren Theobald bowled Jason Harding at seven, his 2nd of the season and 5th career duck from 25 innings, 165th of 1372. A chip off the old block, with father Alan Boyns already sitting on 21 career noughts of his own. Ryan draws level on 5 with Ron McCormick, who compiled his in 138 innings across 1991–2009 before bowing out, fittingly, on a duck of his own. Week in Summary Four ducks from six matches, evenly spread across Saturday and Sunday, home and away, no pairs and no family affairs this time, just steady attritional business for the club's most exclusive society. The 1st XI's Cobham innings alone accounted for half the week's casualties, positions 3 and 10 either end of the order proving equally hospitable to nought. Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 🏆 1. Matthew Carter — 10 inns, 3 ducks (30.0%) 2. Tom Murphy — 12 inns, 3 ducks (25.0%) 3. Glen Rawson — 19 inns, 3 ducks (15.79%) 4. Richard Piper — 20 inns, 3 ducks (15.0%) 5. Darren Styles — 5 inns, 2 ducks (40.0%) Carter and Murphy's Cobham exploits keep them locked at the summit. Will anyone dare challenge them next week, or does the top of the table remain a two-man race to the bottom? 🏏🍩 Roll up to the next fixture, bat first, and give the Duck Club something fresh to write about. 0️⃣🦆

Five ducks took flight across two fixtures this week, with the 2nd XI shouldering the entire burden both days out at West Farleigh and Bearsted. The exclusive zero club welcomes its latest inductees below. Saturday — 2nd XI at West Farleigh CC A rare and treasured ceremony here — a Family of Ducks, as the Thirkell family registered not one but two noughts inside the same innings. Will Thirkell went first, caught Darron Day off John Scott at number seven, his 1st career duck from 11 innings — the surname is no stranger to this honours board, with a sizeable regiment of Thirkell kin already well established on it, so young Will simply joins the family trade. Moments later Tim Thirkell followed him back, caught Mick Goodrich off John Scott, his 2nd of the season and a barely believable 84th of his career — good enough for 3rd on the all-time list, with Duck of the Year 1972 and a Full House (a duck at every position 1-11) already banked, plus residency in the Lone Duck, Homebody Duck and Ducks on the Road top tens. Both Thirkells, fittingly, keep company with Benny Bell, who on this very day in 1970 was falling for nought against Hythe CC en route to a career 30. Two Thirkells, one scoresheet, the same fate. Consistency of a very particular kind. Sunday — 2nd XI at Bearsted CC Three more fell to the cause away at Bearsted. Iain Rawson was bowled by Mark Sandhu for his 2nd of the season and 6th career duck — sibling Glen sits just one nought ahead on 7, keeping the Rawson household honours firmly contested. Ron McCormick was bowled by Alex Keeler for his 1st of the season and 5th career duck, a paid-up member of the Retirement Duck club from a past farewell and evidently still finding reasons to add to the tally. And Jamie Ratcliffe, lbw to Steven Benjamin, collected his maiden career duck from 16 innings — which, board-watchers will note, currently makes him the man to catch in this year's Duck of the Year 2009 race. All three keep historical company with Stewart Morrison, who on this same date in 1987 was walking back against Dimanchians CC, on his way to a career 42. Week in summary Five ducks, two away days, and one entire family swept up together in the same innings — a fine week's harvest for the zero club, even if the 2nd XI carried the load entirely on their own. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇 Glen Rawson — 16 inns, 3 ducks, 18.75% 🥈 Richard Piper — 17 inns, 3 ducks, 17.65% 🥉 Chris Newman — 5 inns, 2 ducks, 40.0% 4. Darren Styles — 5 inns, 2 ducks, 40.0% 5. Iain Rawson — 7 inns, 2 ducks, 28.57% The doors of the zero club never close — see you all at the next fixture, where triumph through adversity awaits its next volunteer. 🦆🏏0️⃣

A tidy little haul this week — five ducks across six matches, split neatly between Rumwood and Buckhurst, with the club's two great rivals for the current Duck of the Year crown both adding to their piles on the very same afternoon. 🏏 Saturday 13 June — Rumwood CC (away) 1st XI Richard Piper got things underway, caught behind off Neil Dibben without troubling the scorers. His 3rd of the season and a round 50th for the career — moving him to 11th in the all-time list and confirming, yet again, his place among the club's grandest zero-collectors. Piper is a fully paid-up member of the Full House club (a duck at every position, 1 to 11), sits in the Ducks on the Road and Homebody Duck top tens, and remains reigning Duck of the Year from 2003 — proof, if any were needed, that consistency of a very particular kind is his stock in trade. On this very day back in 1971, Graham Abel was doing exactly the same thing against Bobbing Court CC — some things never change. 2nd XI A grim afternoon on the road at Rumwood, with three quacks recorded in the same innings. Glen Rawson fell first, caught off Patrick Hill, his 3rd of the season and 7th of a growing career — sitting him level with James Piper (1998–2009, 131 innings) on exactly seven career ducks. Kindred spirits in nought. Trevor Back followed, caught off the same bowler, his 1st of the season but a chunky 65th for his career — 5th in the all-time standings, a Ducks on the Road and Homebody Duck top-ten regular, and a veteran of the exclusive "Only Two Quacks" and "Quacking Together" honours. On this day in 1971, Graham Abel was again keeping company, this time with two Linton legends for the price of one. And to complete the set, none other than Tim Thirkell himself joined the queue, caught off Ben Powell for his 1st of the season and 83rd of an extraordinary career — still 3rd on the all-time roll of dishonour, Full House member, and a name that appears on the Duck of the Year board back in 1972. The Thirkell name runs deep in these parts — brother, parent and assorted kin between them account for well over 150 further career ducks, a genuine dynasty of the duck. Fittingly, on this same date in 1971, Graham Abel was once more making his own small piece of history against Bobbing Court. 🌱 Sunday 14 June — Buckhurst CC (away) 2nd XI Patrick Hill, fresh from bowling out half of Linton's top order the day before, found himself on the wrong end of the ledger this time, caught off Andrew Sharp. His 1st duck of the season and 2nd of his young career from just four innings — level on exactly two career ducks with Graham Walker, who played between 1998 and 2007. Early days yet for Patrick, but the Duck Club welcomes all comers. 📊 Week in Summary Five ducks from six matches — Rumwood CC proved the deadliest fixture, claiming three Linton wickets for nought in a single innings, while Buckhurst and the rest of the weekend's cricket stayed relatively quiet. No golden ducks, no pairs, no family affairs this week — just honest, hard-earned failure spread fairly across the order. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season 2009 Leaderboard 1. Glen Rawson — 15 inns, 3 ducks (20.0%) 2. Richard Piper — 15 inns, 3 ducks (20.0%) 3. Chris Newman — 4 inns, 2 ducks (50.0%) 3. Darren Styles — 4 inns, 2 ducks (50.0%) 5. Matthew Carter — 8 inns, 2 ducks (25.0%) Rawson and Piper share top spot for now, but with Newman and Styles both boasting a fearsome 50% strike rate of nought, the race is far from settled. 🍩 Same time next fixture, same invitation — the crease awaits, and so does the Duck Club. See you all out there. 🦆

A remarkably restrained week for the exclusive zero club. Four matches went ahead across the period, and the ducks mostly kept their heads down. Only one soul answered the call — but he answered it with genuine pedigree. Saturday 6th June 1st XI vs Selsted CC (away) David Castle strode in at four and departed bowled by Stuart Green — the only duck of the reporting period, and his 1st of the 2009 season. This is not a man new to the art of not scoring: Castle moves to 41 career ducks from 727 innings, good enough — or bad enough — for 19th on the all-time list, and a long-standing member of the Tourist Duck top 10, an honour reserved for those who prefer to fail for nought on somebody else's ground rather than their own. Fittingly, on this very day back in 1967, club legend John Thirkell — the all-time number one, with a scarcely believable 90 ducks across a career running 1943 to 1977 — also fell for a duck, against Civil Service CC, Kent. Some traditions, it seems, keep to the calendar as faithfully as the scorebook. Elsewhere The remaining three fixtures across the weekend passed off without incident for the Duck Club — bats stayed unusually obedient, and nobody else troubled the honours board. A quiet week by our standards, though the season has plenty of miles left in it yet. Week in Summary One duck from four matches is a positively abstemious return for early June. Selsted clearly knew where to pitch it — the rest of the club's bowlers will no doubt be taking notes before next weekend. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 🥇🍩 1. Chris Newman — 2 ducks / 4 innings (50%) 2. Darren Styles — 2 ducks / 4 innings (50%) 3. Matthew Carter — 2 ducks / 5 innings (40%) 4. Tom Murphy — 2 ducks / 7 innings (28.57%) 5. Glen Rawson — 2 ducks / 12 innings (16.67%) A five-way scrap for top spot with everyone locked on two apiece — plenty of season left for someone to break clear of the pack. 🦆 Until next week — keep your eyes on the square and your bat off the ground before the ball arrives. The Duck Club never sleeps, even when the ducks decide to.

Fifteen ducks across five matches this week — the zero club has been positively industrious in the art of not scoring. Saturday 30 May 1st XI, away at Milstead CC: Glen Rawson departed for his 5th career duck, level with brother Iain Rawson (2006–2009, 34 innings) — the family reunion proper comes on Sunday. Ryan Boyns followed for his 4th, joining Iain Cardew (1994–2009, 27 innings) on the same tally, and carries family ties of his own to fellow club member Alan Boyns, up to 21 and counting. Chris Newman closed the innings with his 19th, level with Mark Christmas (2002–2009, 155 innings) — only the first half of his weekend's work. 2nd XI, home to Headcorn CC: four of the five fell under a proper anniversary. On this day in 1993, Paul Gibson (29 career ducks, 1984–2009) made a duck against Underriver CC, and Lewis Burnham, Jason White, debutant Dan Barkaway (run out on his very first senior innings, straight onto the Debutante Duck board) and Lee Tidey (2nd career) all joined that echo. Darren Styles rounded things off with his season-leading 2nd, 15th career overall, level with Kevin Presneill (2001–2009, 130 innings). Sunday 31 May Sunday 2nd XI, away to Lord Raglan: all three ducks landed on the anniversary of Benny Bell's 1969 effort against Tovil (30 career, 1966–1975). Tim Wright notched his 2nd, debutant Michael Hogg opened his account on his first senior innings, and Chris Newman was back for his 2nd of the weekend — 20th career, completing a grim pair. Sunday NVKC, away to Yalding CC, delivered the week's rarest ceremony — a full family production. Glen Rawson returned for his 2nd of the weekend, 6th career, completing his own pair, while brother Iain Rawson fell in the same innings for his 5th. Both land on that same 1969 echo, and together they take their place on the Two of a Quack honours board. Tuesday 2 June — Twenty20 v Bearsted CC Two fell in the same over: Tom Murphy's 9th career duck, level with Ian Hollingworth (2004–2009, 30 innings), and Laurie Probert's maiden LPCC duck, echoing Paul Gibson's effort on this same calendar day in 1995 against Rumwood CC. Week in Summary Fifteen ducks, five matches, two grim pairs and one full Rawson family production. Milstead, Headcorn, Lord Raglan, Yalding and Bearsted all agree — Linton Park do love batting without troubling the scorebook. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Chris Newman — 3 inn, 2 ducks, 66.7% 2. Darren Styles — 3 inn, 2 ducks, 66.7% 3. Matthew Carter — 5 inn, 2 ducks, 40% 4. Tom Murphy — 7 inn, 2 ducks, 28.6% 5. Richard Piper — 10 inn, 2 ducks, 20% See you all next weekend — the zero club never rests. 🦆🍩

Four fixtures out on the park this weekend and, remarkably, the zero club kept its doors all but closed. Only one soul answered the call to the exclusive world of the naught — but as ever, one is quite enough to keep the tradition alive. 🏏 2nd XI — Hollingbourne CC (away) Batting at ten and evidently unimpressed by the whole enterprise, Ian Hollingworth was shown the road lbw to Ian Gutteridge, departing having troubled the bowlers for precisely nought. Not a first-baller mind — he took his time getting there, which in Duck Club circles counts as showing admirable restraint. It's Ian's 1st duck of the 2009 season and his 9th for the club overall, moving him to 105th of 1367 in the all-time standings from 30 innings — a career built on the quiet, unglamorous consistency of not quite getting going. Splendidly, the calendar has form here too: on this very day back in 1959, Basil Sears also fell for a duck, against Gore Court CC no less. Basil played from 1947 to 1975 and finished with 33 career ducks, good for 27th all-time — proof that the art of not scoring transcends the decades, and that 23 May has form as an unlucky date on the Linton fixture list. 📅 Week in Summary Four matches, one duck. A vegan weekend by Duck Club standards — the other three fixtures produced not so much as a nibble. Whether that's a triumph of application from the rest of the club or simply the calm before a storm, only next weekend will tell. Either way, the honours board can rest easy for now, disturbed by just the one gentle knock. 🏆 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 1. Matthew Carter — 2 ducks / 3 innings (66.67%) 2. Richard Piper — 2 ducks / 9 innings (22.22%) 3. Carl Davis — 1 duck / 1 innings (100%) 4. Daniel Jackson — 1 duck / 1 innings (100%) 5. Ian Hollingworth — 1 duck / 1 innings (100%)

A rare and faintly unsettling occurrence at Linton Park this weekend: the ducks went into hiding. Two matches played, two matches completed, and not a single nought to show for it. Every batsman across both fixtures managed to trouble the scorers at least once — a state of affairs the Duck Club views with deep suspicion rather than celebration. The exclusive zero club held no inductions, no re-elections, and no milestone quacks this week. Bats were, apparently, middled. Standards have clearly slipped. Whether this represents a genuine outbreak of competence or simply the ducks biding their time for a bumper week ahead remains to be seen. History suggests the latter — the art of not scoring rarely stays dormant for long at LPCC, and the current top of the table are unlikely to let a quiet weekend slow their pursuit of dubious distinction. 🍩 Duck Hunting Season Leaderboard 🍩 1. Matthew Carter — 2 ducks from 3 innings (66.67%) 2. Richard Piper — 2 ducks from 7 innings (28.57%) 3. Carl Davis — 1 duck from 1 innings (100%) 4. Daniel Jackson — 1 duck from 1 innings (100%) 5. Darren Styles — 1 duck from 1 innings (100%) Matthew Carter continues to set the pace with consistency of a very particular kind, while Carl Davis, Daniel Jackson and Darren Styles sit on a flawless 100% strike rate for futility — one innings, one duck apiece. Nowhere to go but down, gentlemen. 📅 Looking Ahead A blank weekend is no cause for complacency — if anything, it's the calm before the quack. With the season still young and several names already on a hair-trigger for their next zero, normal service should resume shortly. Until then, the Duck Club watches, waits, and trusts in the enduring unreliability of the human batsman. 🦆🏏0️⃣

Only a fortnight into the season and the Duck Club has already opened its books for 2009. Three matches over the weekend, two moments of glorious failure — modest pickings, but quality over quantity, as any true collector of noughts will tell you. 🏏 Saturday — 1st XI v West Farleigh CC Openers take note: going in first means going out first, and Richard Piper discovered that the hard way, caught Greg Snape bowled Senthil Muniyasamy without troubling the scorers. It's his 2nd duck of the young season and the 49th of a career that now ranks 12th of 1,366 all time — agonisingly one short of a half-century that would put him in rarefied company. Piper is a paid-up member of the exclusive Full House club, having now ducked at every position from 1 to 11, a feat of dedication most players would rather not have. A former Duck of the Year (2003) and fixture of the Homebody, Lone Duck and Ducks on the Road top tens, he clearly collects noughts the way others collect fifties — and he's not doing it alone, with brother James (7 career ducks) and father Brian (23) also paid-up members of the family firm. Fittingly, on this very day back in 1959, one Brian Mills also strolled back for nought — against St Lukes Maidstone CC, a duck on his own debut no less. 🌱 Sunday — 1st XI v Wingham CC Tom Murphy fell for the first time this season, caught Richard French bowled Jamie Watkins at number 4 without scoring. It's his 8th career duck from 58 innings, sliding him to 125th of 1,366 all time, and it draws him level with Adam Jackson (2001–2007), who reached the same tally in 87 innings. Murphy's rate of arrival rather puts Jackson's to shame. 📋 Week in Summary Two ducks from three fixtures — a quiet weekend by the club's usual standards of self-sabotage, but early season form is early season form, and both victims fell in eerily similar fashion, caught behind the stumps by fielders doing their jobs rather too well. No pairs, no family doubles, no king ducks — just honest, workmanlike failure. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Matthew Carter — 3 inns, 2 ducks (66.67%) 2. Richard Piper — 7 inns, 2 ducks (28.57%) 3. Carl Davis — 1 inn, 1 duck (100%) 4. Daniel Jackson — 1 inn, 1 duck (100%) 5. Darren Styles — 1 inn, 1 duck (100%) Matthew Carter sets the early pace with a fearsome two-thirds strike rate for failure — someone stop him, or better, don't. 🍩 More fixtures on the horizon means more opportunities for the top order to disappoint. The Duck Club awaits its next intake with open arms and low expectations. See you at the crease — briefly, no doubt. 0️⃣🦆

The 2009 campaign is barely a fortnight old and already the exclusive zero club has five new admissions to process. A full weekend of fixtures, three sides finding the target, and Old Roan CC doing a rather efficient job of it against our top order. Saturday 2nd XI — away to Leeds & Broomfield CC William Dolton, in at 8, fell to a catch the scorebook itself seems unsure of ("ct Unsure b Nick Atkinson") — his first-ever LPCC duck, arriving in just his 3rd career innings and installing him at 629 of 1366 in the all-time table. Neat timing too: on this very day in 1959, Frank Brattle (1937-1971, 38 ducks, 23rd all-time) was doing precisely the same thing. Dolton also finds himself, somewhat prematurely, a card-carrying member of the Retirement Duck club — an honour normally reserved for a farewell innings, so nobody panic. At number 11, Darren Styles was bowled by Dom O'Connell for his 14th career duck from 194 innings, good enough for 72nd on the all-time roll — and, fittingly, keeping Frank Brattle company on this same May date in 1959. Sunday 1st XI — away to Old Roan CC Matthew Carter, at 7, bowled by Ben Pearce, brought up his second duck of the young season and 19th of his career, drawing level at 57th all-time with Mark Christmas (2002-2009, 151 innings, reigning 2008 Duck of the Year). Carter himself is no stranger to the honours board, having ducked on debut and taken the 2004 Duck of the Year crown — a proper season pass to the art of not scoring. Two down the order at 9, Daniel Jackson followed him back, also bowled by Ben Pearce, for a maiden LPCC duck from just 7 innings. On this same date in 1997, David Castle (1982-2009, 40 ducks, Tourist Duck top 10) was enduring an identical fate against Bidborough. Sunday 2nd XI — home to Chelsfield Exiles CC Carl Davis, at 4, caught behind off G Marks, brings up his 8th career duck from 41 innings, level with Adam Jackson (2001-2007, 87 innings) at 111th all-time. Davis too carries the Retirement Duck badge from a previous, presumably more final, occasion. Week in review Five ducks from five fixtures, with two sides keeping a clean sheet. Ben Pearce claimed two of the week's five all by himself in the Old Roan match — a fine advert for line and length, considerably less so for the Linton middle order. Duck Hunting Season leaderboard - Matthew Carter — 2 innings, 2 ducks, 100% - Carl Davis — 1 innings, 1 duck, 100% - Daniel Jackson — 1 innings, 1 duck, 100% - Darren Styles — 1 innings, 1 duck, 100% - William Dolton — 1 innings, 1 duck, 100% A perfect 100% start for the whole leaderboard — plenty of room for someone to actually trouble the scorers next week and spoil the fun. See you on the boundary 🏏🍩0️⃣

Season 2009 is up and running, and the zero club wasted no time reopening its books. Two fixtures on the books this weekend, but the exclusive club of dubious distinction found its victims in just the one — both from the same top order, both against the same opposition. Consistency of a very particular kind. 🏏 Saturday — 1st XI v Sheldwich CC Richard Piper strode in at first drop and departed just as promptly, ct Daniel Ray b Gareth Hill without scoring. It's Richard's 1st duck of the new season and his 48th career nought from 410 innings — 13th on the all-time list of 1364 and showing no signs of relinquishing the spot. A former Duck of the Year (2003), Richard remains a fixture of both the Ducks on the Road and Homebody Duck top tens, proof that geography offers no protection, and one of the select Full House members with a duck recorded at every position 1 to 11 — a batting order tour de force in reverse. The zero-scoring gene runs deep too: elder Brian Piper carries 23 career ducks of his own, with sibling James Piper chipping in a further 7. On this very day in 1982, LPCC great Jim Hall was also walking back for nought, against Chatham Nomads CC no less — Jim went on to finish his 1967–2008 career with a staggering 79 ducks, 4th on the all-time roll. Not to be left out, Matthew Carter fell b David Prior for a duck of his own, his 1st of the season and 18th of a 111-innings career, good for 60th all-time. A paid-up member of the Debutante Duck club from his first-ever knock, and a former Duck of the Year (2004) himself, Matthew now sits level on 18 career ducks with Chris Newman, who reached the same tally in 93 innings between 2002 and 2008. Kindred spirits in nought, several years apart. 📅 Sunday The second fixture of the weekend, mercifully or not, passed without addition to the ledger — a rare vegan affair for the Duck Club this week. 📊 Week in Summary Two ducks, two matches, both noughts falling in the same innings against Sheldwich CC — a full house of failure concentrated in one Saturday afternoon. Early season, and the club's regulars are already finding their range. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard 1. Matthew Carter — 1 innings, 1 duck, 100% 2. Richard Piper — 3 innings, 1 duck, 33.33% Carter leads on strike rate alone, though it's early days and Piper has history on his side. Plenty of season left for the standings to shuffle. 🍩 Next fixture looms, and with it another chance for the club's membership to grow. We watch. We wait. We celebrate the art of not scoring. 0️⃣🦆

A quiet start to proceedings this week, ducklings. One match played at Linton Park and, remarkably, not a single soul could be persuaded into the exclusive zero club. Eleven batsmen wandered out, and eleven batsmen wandered back having troubled the scorers at least once. The art of not scoring, it seems, was simply not practised this weekend. 🏏 The Match No fixture details to trouble the Duck Club's ledgers this time — just the rare and slightly unsettling sight of a clean sheet. Somewhere out there a golden duck went unclaimed, a king pair sat unassembled, and the honours boards gather a little more dust for another week. 0️⃣ The Numbers - Ducks recorded: 0 - Matches played: 1 - Golden ducks: none — nobody even gave the bowlers that satisfaction - Pairs, king pairs, family affairs: not today A statistically improbable outcome for a club built on the beautiful inevitability of the nought. Enjoy it while it lasts — form like this rarely survives a second weekend, and the Duck Club always gets its ducks in the end. 🥇 Duck Hunting Season leaderboard The 2009 season is freshly opened and the honours board stands empty — no innings, no ducks, no percentages to report just yet. A blank canvas, ready for the first brave (or unlucky) contender to etch their name into it. 📅 Looking Ahead Rest assured, this drought is a blip and not a trend — the ducks are merely regrouping. Get out there next weekend, Linton, and give the Duck Club something to celebrate. The zero club never stays empty for long. 🦆🍩